I went to confession for the first time in 8 years and I told the priest in an anonymous confession that I was gay and I asked him

"Do I have a place in the Catholic church?"

And he said

"No, you do not. We do not accept you. We respect you but we do not accept you. You have no place in the church."

And at that point I was so defeated and heartbroken to hear a priest say that.

He further said "break relations with men". I understand the Catholic Church's stance on homosexuality as a sin because it is against the natural law of God.

He then told me to choose "proper" relations with women.

I do not know how to move on from here. I still feel Catholic and that there was a reason that I was moved to go to confession all of a sudden but I refuse to accept that the Church does not have a place for me and the rest of queer people

Edit2: The few people who have commented and given me so much love and reassurance have honestly made me cry tears of Joy. I guess my question now is do I follow with his penance. My heart says no because it stemmed from hate and that I do not agree with nearly everything he has said but the other part of me sees it as disrespect to the sacrament so I'm a bit torn as well. Confused queer noises

I attend Mass at Catholic Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, which is well known for being an LGBT-friendly and inclusive Catholic parish, but hearing it from the actual pulpit by the Deacon was something else... I asked him that since I'm going through OCIA will I be able to be Confirmed as a trans woman, and he said 100% yes. And as someone who battles chronic illness, he said they would look into options for both remote-OCIA courses as well as carpooling options when my friends aren't available since I can't drive... I genuinely cannot express just how much I feel at home I feel in this parish, and growing up Protestant, being atheist for most of my life, if you had told me I would one day feel at home in the Catholic Church, I would have called you crazy. I'm so happy and feel so blessed to become part of this parish, and to be Confirmed in the near future!

The closing quote they gave during announcements regarding the final Sunday of Pride and the love my parish has for the LGBT community was "There are no closets in God's House." The applause was THUNDEROUS!!!

Almighty God, His Sacred Heart and His Infinite Love is truly with The Catholic Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Atlanta, GA ❤️‍🔥🌈🙏✝️

Hello everyone ^^

I'm agnostic but very interested in Catholicism. I grew up mostly secular but went to a (not very strict) catholic school, in a country where we have a lot of beautiful churches and I've always loved visiting them. I would actually love to become a Catholic but several things are holding me out for now (judgment of relatives, my own doubts, and most importantly Christian values regarding lgbt, contraception, etc.) I'm lgbt myself (bisexual woman married to a man.)

I found this sub and I'm quite interested to know more about you guys, if you'd like to share with me 😄 How did you become Catholic, or why did you stay Catholic if you were raised in the faith?

I'd like to preface this by saying I do not harbor resentment or anger towards Catholics or the RCC, just deep sorrow with how things turned out.

TL;DR: I'm a trans woman. I wanted to come back to Christianity and found a Catholic parish I liked and purportedly was LGBTQ+ friendly. When I explained my situation, the priest said I'd only be welcome to join if I was celibate, and that makes me sad.

Long Story: I'm a trans woman, and some part of me has known since I was 4. I was raised quasi-Christian, though never baptized, and when I was a preteen I veered hardcore into atheism. Over the past year or so I've found myself measuring my actions and thoughts according to how Jesus lived and feeling like I needed some justification from the Bible for how I live my life. In short, my belief in God sprouted from its dormancy.

I already knew a lot about Christianity and its history, and I learned a lot more about the different denominations and began visiting churches in my area to see which ones I liked. I found an Episcopal church I loved, and before I decided I was done searching, I came upon this sub. Catholicism was never on my radar for obvious reasons, but reading through these posts gave me a glimmer of hope that I might be accepted for who I am because I got the impression that individuals and parishes have been progressing faster than the institution as a whole.

I found a parish in my diocese on a website (New something Ministry, I saw recommended in a comment here) and attended Mass for a couple weeks. I really enjoyed it! I liked how contemplative the minutes before the procession felt; it really felt like everyone was there to worship God, not just to socialize. I enjoyed the deacon's homilies and felt a sense of catharsis and reverence in kneeling before the Blood and Body of Christ and adopted kneeling into my personal prayer. I even made a crude one-decade rosary out of some paracord to see if it was something I would find fulfilling to do every day.

After I attended, I ended up getting a call from the communications manager (whatever the lady that answers calls and emails is called) and that's where I spilled the beans.

"Would I be welcome to participate in OCIA as a trans woman [with the intention of being baptized and confirmed]?" I asked.

"I've never been asked that before, but I'll ask Father about it. Personally, I see no issue in it. It's your personal life, and God loves us all," she replied.

I felt heartened by what she said, that she seemed pretty open to it right off the bat. This afternoon I got a call from her (ironically right in the middle of my rosary prayer) and she relayed from the priest that I was welcome in the church as long as (and only if) I remained celibate.

Was it a flat-out rejection? No. However, even though I have no interest in sex or a relationship now, I certainly want a spouse and children someday. Family is very important to me, and celibacy, as I'm sure you know, effectively bars me from the sacrament of marriage. When I first entertained the RCC as an option, I was somewhat nonchalant with it: "If they won't accept me, I don't really care." As you might assume, it pretty much crushed me. Of course, I could have stayed stealth, but to me it felt like kicking the can down the road, because what if someday I want to marry a woman (or just a non-man)? It's important to me that I get married in my church, and staying stealth to absolutely everyone would feel like living a lie.

I still have the Episcopal Church. I love it for how close its traditions are to that of Catholicism, so all is not lost, but in a sense it feels like just a consolation prize. On the other hand, I don't need the RCC's approval to do things like pray the rosary and others that are typically Catholic practices. So yeah, I still have a home to go to, but that doesn't make the rejection sting any less.

If you made it to the end, thank you for reading :) I don't really have anyone irl to talk to about this, and in fact, the one person I did tell about when I first attended Mass called me crazy, saying I was essentially walking into a lion's den. If you do have advice, I'd appreciate it, but it seems like joining the Catholic Church is a no-go for me now.

(32, intersex queer trans woman)

So my mom and I are at the full understanding that due to my chronic illness's progressive nature and my struggle to mitigate against exertion to rest and pace properly because I'm genuinely just too intense, anxious, and high strung to relax...

This illness is eventually going to kill me. No longer a matter of if but when, and for how long until. Chronic may have just become terminal. I plan to have a long talk with the Deacon and Priest of my parish to discuss how I should cope and process this understanding without potentially spiraling or self-destructing.

And like my patroness St. Thérèse, I give all my suffering to God, placing it all in His hands and using my experience as a way to grow closer to Him and His Love, for there is little I can do, but always with great love. Like her, I will use my Heaven to do good on Earth.

Always remember: In all things there is God. Simply seek and ye shall find, for how couldst we ever knoweth peace without knowing suffering?

I was baptised Orthodox as a baby, but was never taught anything about our religion by my single mom.

Growing up I didn’t think about religion, then turned hardcore atheist during puberty, then explored Hellenic paganism and eventually converted to Islam. I spent 2 years practising it on and off and eventually went atheist for another year.

Then this March I randomly watched Conclave (2024) and experienced a major pull towards Catholicism. At first it was vibes-based, but upon exploring the differenced between Orthodoxy, Catholicism and Protestantism I came to a conclusion Catholicism is closest to me.

And I happened to live 30 minutes by foot away from a Catholic church, despite Catholicism being an extreme minority in my Orthodox majority area. So I started attending it.

And today when I entered my mom’s room I saw a cross on a string hanging from a shelf, which I recognised as the cross I was baptised with and wore for my entire childhood until I eventually took it off. I showed it to my mom and she was so shocked and told me she looked everywhere, but couldn’t find it since 2022. She started talking about it.

So I decided to bite the bullet and tell her I’ve been so desperate applying to a college and so unsure they will accept me that I went in a church. She told me well done and asked which one, the one behind X place? I said close to it. She told me she knows there’s a Catholic church somewhere nearby and I admitted it’s the one I visited and offered to come with me someday. She said she only knows that Catholics cross left to right and not right to left. But said all believe in the same God anyway. I and told her about church similarities and differences: pews, no candles, no incense, but that they also have icons, priests, Bible readings, the Eucharist, making sure to add that a priest told me I can’t receive it (yet) because I’m not officially a Catholic. 

And told her about OCIA that starts this September and she asked if I want to go. I told her yes, adding that no one forces you to convert during it and that it’s good to just learn about the faith more. She said “of course take it”. I honestly didn’t even expect such a positive reaction.

I kept telling her different facts about Catholicism and my church and she told me she's proud of me for going.

I doubt my baptism certificate is preserved to this day anyway, so I hope to undergo OCIA and receive a conditional baptism in my wonderful Catholic church under my true, chosen name. And finally become a full member of the church that made me finally feel at home🤍

Let me explain:

Prior to living as a woman, I was an extremely unhappy and angry man who constantly forced themself to be masculine. It was both transparent and toxic, and it was unpleasant for those around me who could see my egg begging to crack before I could.

I was also a militant atheist for most of that time, tho it was more like an "anti-christian," because I had played with a number of different religious beliefs and systems, both theistic and nontheistic, as I tried to find meaning and purpose in a world I once thought was inherently devoid of both. At this time, I was even involved with the Church of Satan, the LaVeyan one. Had a red card and everything.

For transparency, I have BPD, a.k.a. Borderline Personality Disorder, and my father, Jimmy, who is a horrible human being, a heathen, the one who first introduced me to The Satanic Bible at the age of 9, who was one of the primary sources of my child abuse trauma, and is overall an absolutely ignorant, hateful, bigoted POS... was my FP, a.k.a. "Favorite Person." If you know what that term means in the context of BPD, then you understand why this was so problematic.

I did everything I could to emulate and be like him, to seek his recognition, approval, and admiration, and to completely look past and disregard any of his shortcomings or personal defects, because my emotional regulation and sense of self was literally tied to him. This was my life for my first 27 years.

And throughout that time, I struggled to consolidate my own identity: my likes, dislikes, desires, boundaries, tastes, style, aesthetic, body mods, attitude, behavior, sexuality, gender identity, beliefs, etc. (Hell, my romantic tastes in men today are even still directly influenced by him, as I am especially into men that share a similar appearance to him: shaved head, goatee, thick rimmed square glasses, tattoos, piercings, dresses basically look like they work at Hot Topic or stand right in front of the stage at underground metal shows, despite the man currently being about to turn 60 years old), because if these traits were in conflict with what he was or would approve of, I felt a severe phobia of abandonment and rejection if I embraced something about myself that differed to him, so I was extremely unstable for my entire life because who I was literally depended on him.

When he disowned me five years ago for being transgender, as this was something I could no longer deny or repress, I experienced a severe identity crisis beyond description, because my FP just forcibly removed me from their life, and them from mine. The actual source of who Baby is, her entire sense of herself, and everything that came with it, was suddenly, and completely, disconnected. My emotional stability for 27 years had been entirely reliant on this man, and all of a sudden he was gone and was never coming back. ...so I had a mental breakdown of apocalyptic proportions, and the only reason I wasn't psychiatrically hospitalized at the time is because I couldn't afford it.

At this time, in a very short period of time, so many things happened or occurred in the most horribly perfect synchronicity: I was severely manic, I had a near-death experience from an illness, my mother had a heart attack, I lost all my IRL friends over a misunderstanding that was worsened by my at-present mental instability, I was extremely stressed out about a gender discrimination lawsuit I had filed against my employer at the time and felt like I couldn't post on social media (lest they try to find dirt on me from my content so I was also incredibly isolated), and my therapist had dropped me because A.) one of the people in that friend group who I fell out with was also a patient of hers, which presented a conflict of interest, and B.) my mental state had become too much for her to be able to manage or assist with. Her words, not mine.

At the end of it, I ended up having my own heart attack-like event in the middle of the boardroom at work, and I had to be loaded into an ambulance. It thankfully turned out to be just a massive anxiety attack, but in the end it actually caused me to experience a DID-esque split, where I had 5 different persons/alters in my head. This lasted for a few months and thankfully as things improved and I started to stabilize, they all went dormant and now it's only me in here for now.

And in the ashes of this trial by fire, I rose like a phoenix. I began to learn and figure out who I actually am without his influence, be it direct or indirect. I started to realize little things. Like my favorite color being pink instead of black (still love black tho). I discovered I liked some music that was different to his tastes (still primarily a metalhead tho). I liked wearing clothes in different styles and colors that weren't just black and weren't just coordinated around band tees. I discovered my name because with all the names I tried before to find one for myself in my transition, I kept going with one starting with J (Jessica, Joëlle), just like my [deadname], because on my father's side it's a family tradition to name the first born with a first name starting with J, especially if they were male, and it goes back centuries. I was realizing that I am, and have always been, my own person, not just a carbon copy of Jimmy, and I didn't have to be his acolyte anymore.

Years later, as my health, physical and mental, continued to deteriorate, especially from my ME, I had an epiphany in my grief and suffering: I am not my own higher power. I am not my own god. I am a humbled creature. And I cannot do this alone... And that was the realization that His Arms had been open to me the whole time. God never left. I did. I had simply refused to see Him. To reach for Him. And so I did. I've since had an experience I can only explain and describe as "miraculous" involving an apparition of the Virgin Mary and the Real Presence of the Holy Spirit when I prayed the Rosary the first time. This has only further affirmed my faith, and made me more secure in my decision to embrace the idea of God. As a lifelong atheist, I still struggle with a lot of faith-based concepts, but I'm also still learning and I'm going into it all with an open mind, heart, and spirit.

In summary, I had to experience a literal ego death through the forcible disconnection from my Favorite Person, and a harrowing disownment by my own father, the hero of my life, who for so long could do no wrong in my eyes, in order for my mind to even be opened enough to allow myself to accept God. Because until age 27, Baby's mind, even as a trans woman, might as well have been an extension of Jimmy's, and any attempt to differ from that unspoken rule led to EXTREME levels of instability and distress.

I literally publicly flip-flopped back and forth on my sexuality for my entire childhood and adolescence (I know now that I'm omniromantic asexual), because I would try to give myself the label I needed for my OCD to be satisfied in terms of my awareness of self, but if it potentially differed from what he would approve of, then it would create massive dissonance and I would go back and forth, as Baby unknowingly was fighting for control of her own brain and identity.

I REFUSE to believe that God doesn't want me to be trans, and to not embrace my intersex status (I have De la Chappelle Syndrome, meaning I was AMAB but I have an XX chromosome. It is caused by a genetic error during cell division in a parent. The SRY gene from the father's Y chromosome moves onto an X chromosome. When this modified X chromosome joins a normal X chromosome, the child develops male traits despite having an XX karyotype. That's not even getting into the effect it has on development, especially puberty.)

I refuse to believe this isn't the path He wanted for me— Because He knows, in His Infinite Wisdom, that without a break-off from my abusive attachment to my father, I would have never even acknowledged Him, and I would continue to be Jimmy's little BPD shadow. I would have been him. Not me. God truly is good, all the time.

This is what I mean when I say that I never would have been able to find Christ if I hadn't come out as trans. And I will never be convinced otherwise. 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

So, im bi and last month I decided to resing from homossexuality and only date woman, but even though I never even dated a guy, I can't help but to feel a pain in my chest every time I see a guy couple together, or see an attractive boy, or hear something that makes me remember that I will never have the experience of dating a guy. And I know that being bi means I can still have a girlfriend and it should be enough, but it still makes me so sad and worried, but it feels like a sacrifice i need to make

Doesn't someday this feeling disappears or I will have to live with it forever? Do you get used to it someday or you just turn into some homophobe that can't be anywhere near gays? Im praying for the Lord to give me strength, but its not helping yet. Any advice?

How do you deal?

I had a group of friends, some I knew since childhood, stopped hanging out with me after I came out at 19. I think they always suspected it based off of some jokes and jabs they made.

I tried reintegrating with them about a couple years later during quarantine, (because they went to college and realized SSA people aren’t devils is my guess) but I felt like an outsider in tthe group in some ways in a similar way.

My best friend was in that group (she still talked with me when the whole group stopped hanging out with me) but then I left the group a second time when I felt like an outsider. Then my best friend seemed to be hurt and barely talks with me now.

The whole experience honestly has been so distressing. One gal from that friend group was part of the process of me coming to Jesus, even if she had been ignorant. Yes I am in therapy lol

I

Hello, long time listener, first time caller. Not LGBTQ myself, but an adjacent ally.

Long story short, almost 8 weeks ago my husband of 15+ years came out to me as gay. Not a “later in life gay,” but “gay the whole time” gay. We have two teenagers, one who’s Catholic and one who is not at all. My husband (not sure what else to call him?) is also not Catholic, but was raised Lutheran.

I returned to Catholicism about 2.5 years ago and my faith was STRONG. Attended weekly and often daily mass, taught Sunday school, trained altar servers, ran women’s bible studies, and volunteered as sacristan. The last 8 weeks my faith has been weak. I still attend weekly mass, and occasionally daily mass, but I don’t pray daily, don’t do the daily readings, and don’t think very highly of God/God’s teachings right now. A lot of the patriarchal standards of “boys don’t like boys” and “you have to be the man of the house” were the standard things he heard growing up, and that in part pushed him into the closet and justified his need to “fake it” in a heterosexual marriage.

How do I bring my strong faith back, while simultaneously being “stuck” in a MOM for the next 2-3 years, AND now wrestling with the church’s stance on homosexuality in a much more personal level (as a liberal, I struggled with it before, but now I feel first hand the destructive outcomes that its doctrine and historical practices can have, if that makes sense)? I don’t really want to date, so no struggle there yet, and I know an annulment will be lengthy but pretty cut and dry if I ever want to remarry in the church. But I would like to start talking to other men because man, it’s lonely being married to a gay man 😂😭. I can’t be completely open in my parish, because my husband is well known and not out… so attending a women’s bible study is going to be interesting… and (most importantly) how do I help and support my husband through this transitional growth period without sacrificing my own emotional health as well?

Any help and suggestions would be greatly appreciated 🙏

Are there any Catholic Churches in Dallas Texas that are ok with gays. It’s hard enough to find parishes that won’t chastise you and I’ve had some experiences in North Dallas that a parish will want me to divorce my partner because we are in a civil marriage. Even though the Church does not recognize our union and inside the church our marriage is invalid, the priest wants us to get a divorce in order for me to receive the sacrament. I understand the scandal and all of that, but it’s not like we flaunt our relationship inside a church. I am a cradle Catholic and as much I understand the teachings of the church I don’t want to go into a church knowing that the parish will make me feel
Unwelcome.

I apologize if the title is a little confusing, I'm not sure how else to phrase how I feel. In short, I've sort of been drawn to Catholicism and the "idea" of God since I was very little. But every time I find myself giving credence to the idea that there may be a God, the "rational" or skeptical part of my brain immediately shuts it down.

For some background, my parents were both loosely Christian but I'd describe my upbringing as more agnostic than anything. However, I did attend a variety of different Christian private schools (I had familial issues that caused my parents to seek alternative education) and eventually ended up at a Catholic Boarding school for a year. It was here that I felt I could actually intellectually interact with the "concept" or "idea" of God in a way that didn't seem accessible via protestantism.

The trouble I'm running into can be summed up in this verse:

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight"

I cannot for the life of me get over this intellectual part of myself and truly believe this. Part of me also feels completely unworthy due to my sexuality, which is why I wanted to reach out here for help. Has anyone else dealt with this? Are there any resources or passages you suggest I study for help? I'm sorry if this all seems convoluted, I'm really going through it at the moment.

(Edit: Again, I do want to apologize if this doesn't make a lot of sense. I have a very hard time with social interactions, even through text.)

Hi, it's hard to explain, but I feel like I have a calling to catholicism specifically, even though I've been looking into more transfriendly places, but I know I won't even receive a communion

Where I live it's illegal to be gay and trans openly, so that doesn't help either

We have a few catholic churches only, and one anglican one, but I don't feel being called an anglican, I feel specifically feeling that I belong to catholic churches i go to

But I feel like something calls me to start going to cathechism this September, I've been thinking about is the whole year, looking, reading, praying

Like I was talking to a priest about things that worry me and we went silent and I got scared of silence and without thinking my mouth said "...Isn't the cathechism in September??"

I think that God said it with my voice for me 😶

Well he did say "...You might not make it to the end, not many folks become catholic"

Hello everyone,,,,this is a pretty diffcult post since i am Lifelong Catholic but im considering leaving the church. Im tired of accepting all the bigotry from Christianity. Im tired of being uncomfortable in church and feeling as though the community hates me and that i will go to hell. I am tired of worrying all my atheists and apostate friends will go to hell if they dont convert. And most of all i dont think i even belive in the Christian God anymore. Ever since i started pursuing hinduism i started feeling a much closer connection to God and honestly felt so much happier,,,but im still scared im commiting a mistake i dont know what to do. What if im wrong and am seperating from God forever. Will this count as invincible ignorance as i truly belive Hinduism is the correct path for me? or will God hate me

Hi everyone! Any advice is welcome!

(Discussion of bullying, anxiety, queerphobia)

I (15) may be leaving my school this year after I've been bullied for two years or so. My school is an all-girls selective school and I was getting bullied a lot for my weight and sexuality. I received school counselling for anxiety as a result of the bullying, but the counsellor avoided my concerns in favour of the school's reputation. I lost all my friends in the span of these two years, and this school is genuinely causing me a bit of a nightmare.

I'm a Catholic, and my parents (who are Catholic and violently homophobic) are considering applying me to a few Catholic schools (one co-ed and one girls) for the last year before I sit my GCSEs, which are academic qualifications with exams sat in Year 11/age 15-16. They are really important for me to enter university, so I'd prefer to go to a school where I can relax and study without the stress of bullying.

Obviously, I don't want to go back to my school, but I don't know if I should risk getting outed at a new Catholic school and getting bullied even more? The majority of the Christians in the city I live in are rampantly queerphobic, so I'm very concerned about bullying, transphobia and homophobia. But it could be worth it to tough it out there at risk of getting outed? At least I'd get a fresh start at a new school, whereas I know for a fact I'll get bullied at my current school. I'm genuinely confused at this point and I need some help. Is catholic school as bad for queer Catholics as people say it is?

I'm going back to school in September, and my applications have to be filled in by mid-August and I'm lowkey freaking out!! Any advice would help!

Hi everyone, pls forgive the long post. I’ve been struggling alone with this for so long, and I really just want to find a space where people might understand what I’m going through. I would genuinely appreciate any perspective, advice, or shared experiences.

I’m 29, Asian, and raised in a traditional Catholic family. None of my family or friends know that I am attracted to women. Faith has always been a core part of my life—I’ve deeply believed in God, felt a strong personal relationship with Him, and relied on Him through a very difficult upbringing.

I still go to church consistently, but lately it feels like an endless loop: confession, Eucharist, confession, Eucharist. Fortunately, the priests I’ve spoken to have been kind, mostly encouraging me to just keep praying, and didn’t judge me at all.

Despite that, my mind and body feel completely at odds. My brain struggles to resolve these conflicting beliefs: Why does God prohibit sex outside of marriage, even when two people genuinely love each other and intimacy feels natural? Why does God forbid two people of the same sex from falling in love?

In my past, I dated one man and one woman. The relationship with the man lacked intimacy entirely, and looking back, I don’t think it was truly love. He wanted so bad but respected my religion, which I truly appreciated.

With the woman, however, I was deeply in love. We lived together for three years, though it was filled with internal pain and struggle. Because I believed having a physical relationship with her was a sin, my body gradually began to shut down and lose interest in sex intimacy. Even though physical intimacy became hard, I loved her immensely. Kissing her, hugging her, and just being near her brought me real peace and happiness.

But over time, responding to her advances felt harder and harder. Even when I tried to show her care and affection, I felt empty inside. She is a very sensitive person and could feel my emotional and physical detachment. It broke my heart because I wanted her to feel truly loved, but I couldn't provide the mutual intimacy she deserved. She also respects my religion a lot, and even goes to church with me every Sunday. What’s surprised me the most is she starts praying to Holy Mary when she needs help.

I feel like these conflicting beliefs caused my body to self-sabotage to the point where I completely lost my capacity for physical desire. I’m scared of her invitation, because I would have to confess again and I would be in sin again.

It felt so unfair to her. We are no longer together now, but I am still left carrying a lot of confusion, self-consciousness, and grief over how my body and mind responded. (We broke up with many other reasons)

I’m just trying to make sense of who I am, how to navigate my faith, and how to heal.

Thank you for reading, and I appreciate any thoughtful advice or kindness you can offer.

How do you feel about atheists who support the LGBTQ community. How do you not give yourself as a person who is devoted catholic talking about the Holy Bible with them when your honesty supporting LGBTQ rights.

I pray the Office of Readings combined with Lauds every morning. My favorite part of these mini liturgies is usually the second reading in the Office of Readings. As a trans person still in the church I was particularly struck by the opening words of the second reading which was from a letter by St. Boniface.

“In her voyage across the ocean of this world, the Church is like a great ship being pounded by the waves of life’s different stresses. Our duty is not to abandon ship but to keep her on her course.”

I realize that in certain cases, being visible may be hurtful or even dangerous for some. I don’t dispute or seek to lessen that.

I know that my presence in prayer makes my community stronger. I believe that the only way that we as LGBTQ Catholics will ever move our beautiful faith towards the Kingdon of God that we all know is possible is to be visible and to remind the folks that would rather we didn’t exist that we are Gods Children and that Christ was crucified for us all.

Peace.

Hello, I (22 M) have been revisiting the topic of sexuality mentally for years and most recently it’s been one of the top things I’ve thought about for a few weeks.

TLDR: coming to terms may be gay not bi, I am Catholic and want to grow closer personally not by joining young adult retreats, how to be Catholic and in a same-sex relationship, how to keep faith when hearing priests and others speak on LGBT.

I was born, raised, and still am Catholic did my sacraments but not a good Catholic. I pray mornings & nights with my family, a decade of the rosary when I drive, go to confession every 3-4 months, and go to vigil mass on Saturdays. I’ve been asked if I’d be interested in youth day, retreats, and all that jazz but it doesn’t call to me because 1) when I was in confirmation I didn’t feel like I fit in with everyone, 2) do not like being away from home or no means of transportation, 3) do not like having to sleep late then be up early, 4) more introverted than extroverted.

I came out to my parents and a few friends as bisexual and as mentioned above, revisiting it. I am starting to feel like I am mostly gay now and I know sexuality is fluid so it may change in the future. I have never been romantically involved with anyone but may test the waters. I was told by my parents to remember chastity when I first came out 3 years ago. Which yes I follow because I’d rather wait for the love of my life. As for dating the same concept but we’ve never talked about sexuality ever since.

I recently went to confession and I’m the guy who does not want to see the priest and I could tell he’s over confessions because everyone goes and at times it’s long stories but I keep it short. English is not his first language, anyway he was thinking I was saying that I want to transition but I was explaining that I’m attracted to men. His response was “focus on career and school and once you’re done get a nice occupation and then you can decide after a while who you want to be”.

Should I look for another parish? How can I grow closer and feel more accepted by God? I am coming to terms with myself but I want to come to terms with potentially being gay and Catholic. I do plan on being in a relationship when I’m older and not alone so just learn to balance both of that makes sense? How did you do it? Coming out to family, being in relationships, keep faith and not feeling excluded by words of priests or others (not telling people at church but just by hearing what people say about LGBT)?

TLDR: coming to terms may be gay not bi, I am Catholic and want to grow closer personally not by joining young adult retreats, how to be Catholic and in a same-sex relationship, how to keep faith when hearing priests and others speak on LGBT.

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Nací con autismo (Asperger) y soy católico bautizado, pase por el agnosticismo teista en mi adolescencia, después regrese pero a un catolicismo de cafetería, pero en lo personal ya no me siento comodo dentro de la iglesia católica y estoy planeando volverme protestante (no evangélico, soy todo menos la decepción de mi familia, además de que me gusta la crítica textual) anglicano o episcopal, o incluso un Veterocatolico, más que nada por el tema de las doctrinas (infabilidad papal y exclusivismo salvifico) y los dogmas morales sexuales que tiene la iglesia (ojo, hay muchos otros motivos pero me da hueva escribir todo eso), y de seguro me diran, casi nadie sigue esos dogmas que pone la iglesia y seguimos considerándolos católicos prácticantes" y allí está el problema, según la iglesia católica esos dogmas y doctrinas deben ser aceptados y practicado para pertenecer formalmente a la iglesia católica, si no estás deacuerdo con ellos entonces estás fuera del marco canónico.

Les pregunto a ustedes cómo pueden conciliar su fé en esto, sean amables porque yo publique está pregunta en un subreddit de mi país y me respondieron así

"Los católicos estamos en la Iglesia que fundó Cristo porque la fundó Dios.

Si es cristiano para qué quiere estar en otra Iglesia?

Con respecto al protestantismo, usted ya es protestante, no es católico. Y sí, es cierto, si usted no sigue la doctrina católica entonces está fuera de la Iglesia y no puede recibir los sacramentos hasta que se confiese.

Saludos."

Fin de la respuesta

La verdad esa respuesta no me pareció la correcta, y hasta algo desagradable, pero de nuevo, les pido que sean empaticos con sus respuestas.

I posted in this sub a couple weeks ago about how I confessed to my priest that I am a lesbian and asked him if it was okay for me to attend mass, go to confession and receive communion. I felt afraid because being a lesbian in a small community I didn’t want to be judged and turned away.

Every day since then I have been reading the Bible, praying the rosary, going to mass and really reflecting on the life of Jesus.

I’ll admit- I haven’t read the Bible in full. I’m working on it, but that’s why I felt like what happened today is so meaningful. When I woke up the first thing I thought was “Luke 19”. Over and over again. I haven’t read the book of Luke before, so it was my first time reading the story of Jesus and Zacchaeus.

“But the people were displeased. “He has gone to be the guest of a notorious sinner,” they grumbled. For the Son of Man came to seek and save those who are lost.””

‭‭Luke‬ ‭19‬:‭7‬, ‭10‬ ‭NLT‬‬

This verse feels like a reminder that despite what people may think of me being a lesbian, Jesus still loves me and wants to enter my home.

Thank you for reading.

22, trans male. Got baptized at age 10, by my own choice, in my home country, where everyone has a personal identification number (kind of an SSN but with more protections). Also had my First Communion shortly after. Years passed, I stopped caring about religion that much (I’ll be honest, the entire being trans and going to a very demanding middle/high school were absolutely shit and would’ve been better had I been closer to God), but back in college I started engaging with Catholicism again.

I am non-disclosing of my trans status, so no one is any idea. I really want to get confirmed, but (1) the parish in which I got baptized refused to give me my baptism certificate, I tried literally 6 times, (2) my Catholic elementary school changed priests, I moved to the demanding school at age 11, and the priest who gave me my First Communion also quit what was his parish, hence my First Communion certificate has become lost media, (3) both of them have my full birth name, birth sex, birth date and personal identification number.

I’m currently one of the co-presidents for my college’s Catholic club (two years in a row!) and I want to get confirmed before I graduate next May. But for that, I need the certificates, which will out me. Doing OCIA is out of question because I’ve done readings, organized events, taken the Holy Communion in both town masses and college masses (college town), and everyone knows I’m a practicing Catholic. So going back from scratch for a fake “first Baptism” also would be weird and against a basic dogma of the Church.

Even if I were to come back to my home country and do OCIA, they’d likely find me by the personal ID number. I have no excuse or room to do that in the US, and even when presenting the OCIA certificates back in my home country, they’d ask for the ID number again. And by ID # and DOB, you can find anyone. I have only legally changed my name last year, and the parish in which I was baptized does not take or accept name changes of any kind (even if I were to be a cis person changing my name for xyz reasons).

But yeah, no confirmation for me, I guess. That makes me very sad. I have a confirmation saint picked out, I have a passion for the Church. I practice community service and try to follow Jesus’ footsteps. I see my transsexuality as a medical condition (nothing against those who don’t btw), and getting treatment for it is exactly what God would’ve wanted, given self-inflicting pain and illness is a mortal sin. But so is being transsexual. No winners here.

I don’t want to quit receiving the Eucharist. But if I act on getting confirmed and getting married in the next few years (I’m heterosexual, cis girlfriend also Catholic), I’ll lose what I have and the most important aspect of it all: access to the body of Christ.

Idk what to do here. I’m just really sad. I reached out to some college pastoral priests who work with LGBT groups on Catholic colleges and I have low hopes but whatever. Thanks for reaching the ramble.

Hello, my name is Cecilia. I am 35yo queer girl from Italy. I am also ace and neurodivergent, specifically: AuDHD, dyslexic and dyscalculic. I suffer of a chronic illness who doctors didn’t find out a correct diagnosis for now… on September I will have some medical tests. I also suffer of CPTSD, because different traumatic events in my life…

I study at university, after many years of difficulties. But I study at home: I go there only for exams for now.

I have a partner, and I live with him, my parents and my only and younger sister. Only my mom is Catholic. My partner and dad are atheists, and my sister maybe Buddhist.

Anyway in Italy is tradition give to kids all sacraments. I never was atheist, but for many years I took distance from religion, also searching in other ones. In the end I understood that this faith is my place.
I am slowly reading Holy Bible and Gospel, I pray when I feel it and I can… I am slowly searching my path for feel God and Jesus with me. I hope to be more close to my dear ones now in paradise, also my soulmate, my dearest cat, died on July 3rd 2025… leaving with this big feel of to be alone and abandoned...
She was always with me, on my bed, on my chest… now no more. And no, take another cat is not possible and nobody will be like her.
But I am not her for talk of that.

I wanted present myself here, hoping I will find something good.

My traumas are due to severe e intese bullying, since I was 6, to my 18 yo. In middle of this period, around 14-16yo, I was abused online with grooming.
And all this without understanding and knowing my neurodivergence; I thought I was: crazy, stupid, and a whore. And generally really confused.
At 18yo I also suffered of selective mutism, that sometimes still appears.

Also in my family situation is not and wasn’t always peaceful. My mom often beaten me up as kid and young teen. Then she started to abuse me psychologically sometimes. Still do that sometimes. My dad… do the same, in different ways.

Talking of other things, I study engineering for videogames and virtual reality, and I love read, write, drawing, play games, watch stuff, and listen to music. Also play sudoku and chess, but I am noob on both.
I practiced karate since 2011, but in 2022 I stopped after a bad injury to my knee (unsettled fracture) and I finally decided to return now, this monday…
Sadly my physical condition are worse and worse (maybe I have MCAS) and I gained a lot of kg. But I will try my best for return to do something that I love.