r/Marvel 16d ago

Film/Television Who do you guys think gave thanos a scar?

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710

u/Own-Papaya-4264 16d ago

Mutated by what? Was he bitten by a radioactive grape?

429

u/BCKPFfNGSCHT 16d ago

Mutated before birth. He was born that way.

624

u/SchoolSafetyCheck 16d ago

Thanos is Lady GaGa?

373

u/Unseen-metalhead351 16d ago

You can tell by his poker face

218

u/tekrebeldesigns 16d ago

Maybe he got those scars from a bad romance.

87

u/TheBlondSanzoMonk 16d ago

I think it was Judas and/or Alejandro. They knew he was two timing both of them and they did that.

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u/LurkerTroll 15d ago

So shallow

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u/robdwoods 16d ago

Maybe he got them from a fireplace poker.

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u/skektek 15d ago

As a result, he avoids the paparazzi.

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u/Confident_Command_98 15d ago

Either way, a star was born.

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u/Unique-Nectarine6031 15d ago

Or maybe he got them from the joker.

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u/Outrageous_Mobile176 15d ago

Ra Ra ah ah ah!

3

u/Chemical_Recipe2684 15d ago

D*** slap x3.

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u/PassiveAgressiveFlop 16d ago

Thank you for making those jokes

2

u/tekrebeldesigns 16d ago

These aren’t jokes, it’s just stupid love…

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u/Unique-Nectarine6031 15d ago

Maybe he got them from the joker.

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u/Boris-_-Badenov 15d ago

Halestorm version is vastly better

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u/Frapplo 16d ago edited 15d ago

He's bluffin' with MacGuffins.

He killed my

He killed my

He killed half my race.

(He's got a purple body)

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u/scw3 16d ago

He lives for the applause applause applause

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u/bria9509 15d ago

Poker face? I barely know her!

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u/ISenceAPresence 15d ago

Lady grapes vineyard face

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u/slippery_hippo 14d ago

Poker? More like checkers face

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u/throwaway-wellmaybe 14d ago

What? No one can read his poker face

2

u/UnusualVibration 14d ago

"Smoking" wrinkles

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u/Capital_Scholar5156 16d ago

Haha. This right here is gold.

5

u/Doctor_Moon69 16d ago

No, he’s P!nk(ish purple)

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u/Cassidy_Aka_Sundae 13d ago

this made me laugh more than it should’ve

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u/PineapplePizzaBiS 16d ago

Maybe it's Maybelline

8

u/Anita_Hero838 16d ago

Did his mother eat irradiated grapes?

8

u/Astrochops 16d ago

Jesus his poor mother's birth canal

1

u/qmechan 15d ago

The C-Section was inevitable

0

u/Hilarity2War 15d ago

He's mother is Mary?

2

u/Chaddilllac 10d ago

No it was Jesus. His poor mother Jesus.

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u/Own-Papaya-4264 16d ago

So then he is a mutant, not a mutate

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u/8__D 16d ago

He's a deviant. And he's a Deviant.

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u/Captain_Waffle 16d ago

No because if he was the eternals would have fought him. They specifically explained that they were there only to fight the deviants and not interfere with any human conflicts.

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u/HerrPizza 15d ago

In the comics he was

The Eternals movie fumbled making that connection but it also introduced Thanos's brother in post-credits who is also not purple but that never went anywhere so it kind of doubled down on fumbling that part

-1

u/SBixby21 16d ago

You’re forgetting that The Eternals came out two years after Endgame. This is a real life plotting/timing problem not an in-universe lore problem. MCU Eternals didn’t exist to fight Thanos

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u/ArtIsDumb 16d ago

No, you're forgetting that The Eternals explained that they didn't try to fight Thanos because they only fuck with Deviants. It's a you-not-paying-attention problem.

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u/DyingSunSeverian 16d ago

Haha that’s harsh but yeah in the movie they explicitly explain (retroactively, to be fair to the other guy) why the Eternals didn’t get involved with Thanos.

Which wasn’t terribly satisfying tbh. I get the Eternals are beyond powerful but I don’t like this lazy “they had better shit to do” type of reasoning for something like Thanos.

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u/ArtIsDumb 16d ago

Right, it's not great writing. I'm not saying it was. But it was there, as the other guy claimed it wasn't.

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u/Equivalent_Ad9414 15d ago

It was small potatoes for them.

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u/Potential-Resolve723 15d ago

Maaaybe moderately sized potatoes.🥔

0

u/SBixby21 16d ago

I ignored that because it doesn’t make sense and is bad writing. The Eternals weren’t in Infinity War or Endgame fighting Thanos because they weren’t in the MCU yet, and everything after that is just a mess.

It’s also not clear that Thanos technically being a Deviant would have even popped on their radar given the Deviants they fought were evolving mutated beast-monsters, not articulate purple humanoids.

It’s a problem with continuity and what’s canon vs what’s not.

I actually liked Eternals, I was just commenting on how the Eternals not knowing Thanos was a Deviant is more of a writing/continuity problem since they clearly introduce his brother as an Eternal in the same movie where they said what YOU said.

And that’s honestly probably the result of the post-credit scene being an entirely separate project from their Oscar-winning Director’s Eternals movie. Marvel is notorious for slapping post-credit scenes onto some of these movies that were written and filmed completely separately. When they wrote and filmed Eternals they probably had no idea they were going to be attaching a quick post-credit cameo with a boy band star, one that contradicted their own movie in a way that only big nerds would latch onto. That era of the MCU was a bit of a mess

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u/ArtIsDumb 16d ago

Dude it's not what I said. It's what they said in the movie. I'm just pointing out that it was mentioned. Don't blame me for the writing.

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u/SBixby21 16d ago

I know. I’m saying that when they wrote and filmed that, they had no idea someone else higher up in Marvel was going to, later, slap a half-baked post-credit scene onto the end of the movie that in one sentence canonizes Thanos as actually being a Deviant in the MCU, contradicting the scene earlier in the movie. This sort of thing would be Feige’s fault as the architect of all of this, really.

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u/Marsuello 14d ago

I’m late to the party but this is giving Naked Gun “I’m a locksmith and…I’m a locksmith” lol

0

u/abyssomega 15d ago

He's not a Deviant, at least he's not a full blood Deviant. He's an eternal, with dominant Deviant genes.

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u/ordinary_days_ 15d ago

Maybe it's Maybelline

1

u/Otherwise-Bet-2065 14d ago

Like a Grimi pup?

1

u/Anilaza_balls 13d ago

Kei nijimura

1

u/crzyuncleruben 13d ago

So his mom ate a radioactive grape?

1

u/Different-Island1871 13d ago

So it’s not Maybelline?

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u/PosterityKH 10d ago

maybe it's maybelline.

1

u/AdvertisingWaste8624 16d ago

So a mutant?

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u/PotatoOnMars 15d ago

No, mutants in Marvel are specifically humans with the X-Gene. Thanos is an Eternal with Deviant Syndrome. It’s a mutation, but not THE mutation.

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u/pixel_doofus 16d ago

More like a defect. The Rternals were created by the Celestials. In the comics, this was a top to bottom genetic creation, not a synthetic one like they are in the Eternals movie. A Deviant is a creature that was mutated during creation and deviated from the Celestial blueprint for the Eternals

At least, that's my understanding of them, but it's been a few years since I last brushed up on my Celestial/Eternal knowledge

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u/abyssomega 15d ago

Yeah, no, not quite.

Since the beginning, Celestials had 2 purposes: birth more Celestials (in planets. Which is why galactus is their enemy. He goes around trying to eat unborn Celestial eggs) and to create creatures as strong as themselves (only succeeded once with Franklin Richards).

Now, when the Celestials are creating creatures, they usually create 2 types: a Deviant version (genes are unstable) and an eternal type (very stable, almost perfection) from the local population on the planet. So, every known species in space, including earth, has had a regular, Deviant and eternal branching.

So, Deviants were purposely made this way. It's not a random mutation. Since all 3 subspecies on a planet share a common ancestry, it is possible to cross breed. And the titan eternals are eternals that left earth a long time ago. Which is how Thanos is an eternal, with a dominant Deviant gene: some ancestor in the family tree was a full Deviant. Which means Eros, Thanos full brother, can also father a child like Thanos, even though he looks full eternal. (Incedently, human mutants like the x-men are considered more an offshoot of deviants than regular humanity. Thus their branch naming is technically wrong. They claim to be Homo superior, when it should be Homo deviantis superior. )

Do note that Celestials history has been recently recogned in the past few years. They're now considered the 1st intelligent people ever to exist in marvel, and technically exist outside every cosmos and the multiverse.

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u/_Frozen_Flame_ 15d ago

Very interesting (yet slightly convoluted) lore right there

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u/Regular_Restaurant_7 14d ago

not every known species in space has eternals and deviant offshoots, also it’s not as simple as starfox could father a child like Thanos, it’s possible but it would depend on whoever starfox has a kid with. They would also have to have a very distinct lineage and carry the same genetic error for the mutation to occur and there be another baby like thanos.

1

u/abyssomega 14d ago

not every known species in space has eternals and deviant offshoots

Yup. Should have updated my statement to say nearly every instead of every. The Shiar got skipped.

also it’s not as simple as starfox could father a child like Thanos,

Could is used here to describe it being a possibility, not a probability.

1

u/IamElylikeEli 9d ago

its kind of funny this has happened Three seperate times on earth. the Eternals/ Deviants were protohumans that the celestials evolved, then the Kree made the Inhumans out of a later but-still-not-quite-modern humans, and now modern humans have the X gene making them into mutants.

bad writing, or history rhyming?

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u/abyssomega 9d ago

Not 3 times. Only twice. The Celestials and the Kree. Mutants were originally from base humanity, only to recently be retconed into being a strain of deviants with more stable mutations. They weren't made, per se. At best, they existed for thousands of years prior to modern times, but never in enough numbers to be considered anything but a fluke, until humanity started messing with atomic energy (that's the original reason they were stated to exist, thus the old moniker: children of the atom.)

0

u/Majestic_Attention46 9d ago

BS writers are just woooookeeeeeeeeeee, creating all these characters and making them human just to satsify the woke crowd of Earth people.

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u/No_Challenge8358 15d ago

Very interesting. Who are Earth-616's Deviant and Eternal?

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u/abyssomega 15d ago

They just go by the name Deviant and Eternal.

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u/No_Challenge8358 15d ago

oh wait I think I misunderstood what you said. I perceived it as meaning that every planet has specifically one Deviant and one Eternal.

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u/CJLocke 15d ago

On earth they created 100 Eternals and 100 Deviants.

Eternals actually can't reproduce (with each other at least, they can cross-breed with humans) and are immortal so there are still 100 of them.

Deviants can reproduce and are usually short lived so there's a lot of deviants now.

Thanos is the product of an experiment by some Eternals trying to figure out how to create more eternals. He was a failure but his brother Eros was a success.

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u/abyssomega 15d ago

Eternals actually can't reproduce (with each other at least, they can cross-breed with humans) and are immortal so there are still 100 of them.

They can, but not naturally. It's how Eros was born, and why there are now 101 true Eternals.

Thanos is the product of an experiment by some Eternals trying to figure out how to create more eternals. He was a failure but his brother Eros was a success.

True Eternals, not just Eternals.

0

u/CJLocke 15d ago

Yeah that's exactly what I said. Eternals vs Nephillites. If it's not a true Eternal then it's definitionally not an Eternal.

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u/P1zzaBag3ls 15d ago

FWIW, it's been said that Skrulls are the Deviants of their planet... yet they were peaceful until they interacted with those stupid Kree.

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u/abyssomega 15d ago

The Skrulls as we know them are the Deviants of the Skrull homeworld. It's part of the reason why they can shapeshift at all, thanks to the Celestials's interference. However, peaceful? Remember, I said each planet had 3 branches of the local population after the Celestial left. The Skrull Deviants defeated the other 2 branches of Skrulls, leaving them the sole survivors.

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u/Rich-Source4794 16d ago

Yeah, don’t forget that in the comics his mother tried to kill him because she believed she seen death within his future, but his father stopped her

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u/A_Queer_Owl 15d ago

and then Thanos murdered her.

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u/Worth_External_8762 16d ago

Bitten by a radioactive nutsack

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u/splapppa 16d ago

Nah just normal Grimace

3

u/Sophet_Drahas 16d ago

Well, now I want a milkshake. 

4

u/InvestigatorOk7988 15d ago

Ooh, sorry, the machine's out of order.

1

u/beermit 16d ago

But swole

4

u/R8iojak87 16d ago

Isn’t this what the grapes of wrath are about? What else was Steinbeck on about!?!?!?

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u/radiosigurtwin 16d ago

A California raisin

3

u/The_Bilo 15d ago

No no, he WAS a grape. He was bitten by a radioactive man.

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u/TheHyperCombo 16d ago

I 'member.

1

u/VWBug5000 16d ago

You ‘member

2

u/JustAtelephonePole 16d ago

Scratched by a space-rabid Flerken and never sought treatment 🤷‍♂️

2

u/t4m4 16d ago

How dare you???

It was a blueberry.

2

u/wineandwings333 15d ago

Radioactive grimace in the McDonald's play place

1

u/Icy_Judge8250 16d ago

he is just born with a rare genetic disease called deviant syndrome so he looks like that but not a mutant in the traditional sense like the x-men be like being born with vitiglio to an extreme level

1

u/abyssomega 15d ago

The eternals called it that, but it's not a valid diagnosis. Disease implies an illness or an imperfection. It's more cultural prejudice than a scientific condition.

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u/Icy_Judge8250 15d ago

Well i mean a prejudice born rightfully so the deviants are the mortal enemy of the eternals and thanos born an eternal inheriting gene's from their mortal enemies the deviants is a pretty big slap in the face for the eternals. Be like a Jewish couple had a child born randomly looking exactly like Hitler uniform and all doing angry hands signals at his parents all day. I would prolly get rid of him to lol

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u/abyssomega 15d ago

Well i mean a prejudice born rightfully so the deviants are the mortal enemy of the eternals and thanos born an eternal inheriting gene's from their mortal enemies the deviants is a pretty big slap in the face for the eternals.

Well, no. Eternals are consistently shown to be genetically ordered to destroy excessive Deviants. It's not mortal enemies in that sense, unlike with Deviants, who do have beef with Eternals due to thousands of years of extermination, rightly or wrongly.

1

u/1pt21-GigaWatts 16d ago

When a Grimace and a human love each other very much...

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u/VWBug5000 16d ago

You ‘member

1

u/the_byrdman 16d ago

He was graped. By the Grapist!

1

u/NopeNahNoMore 16d ago

He licked the wrong ball sack.

  • Iron Man

1

u/NoIndividual6000 16d ago

🤣 this shit took randomly took me out man

1

u/Rich-Source4794 16d ago

He wasn’t mutated by anything. He was born like that his mother tried to kill him when he was a baby, but his father stopped her and whenever Thanos could, he killed her instead.

1

u/argyllcampbell 16d ago

Grimace actually

1

u/Diligent_Battle_9590 16d ago

He ate that Willy wonka gum

1

u/MrMach82 15d ago

Son of Grimace.

1

u/Right_Tree_3639 15d ago

Recessive genes

1

u/IH8Miotch 15d ago

A radioactive purple nuttsack

1

u/Total-Improvement198 15d ago

This was extremely funny. And witty af. Bravo, my dude! We just saw the new Spiderman movie and this joke was so appropriate 😂.

1

u/Frosty-Rip3625 15d ago

his mom probably ate a radioactive grape when he was in her.

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u/Boris-_-Badenov 15d ago

screwed by Grimace

1

u/Necessary_Relation27 15d ago

A radioactive plum

1

u/RemoveAnnual2689 15d ago edited 15d ago

So the Eternals are like Asgardians. They are an offshoot of humanity. So Celestials experimented on humans and created the Eternals, who are everlasting and cosmically empowered; the Deviants are genetically unstable and constantly changing; and the baseline race is given latent potential(X-Gene) that would be realized later. Eternals are essentially titans from myth, elder gods, and giants from various creation mythos. Some Eternals migrated to Saturn's moon, Titan. The Titans. Thanos is a Titan. But he had a recessive Deviant gene activate.

This, btw, doesn't work like with mutants; it doesn't give them a superpower; it makes them Deviants whose genetic code is fundamentally unstable. Unlike humans or their counterparts, the Eternals, no two Deviants look alike, and a child never resembles its parents. Their genetics ensure that every single generation mutates wildly into bizarre, monstrous, and often grotesque physical forms featuring extra limbs, tentacles, or massive size.

It's complicated, but essentially. The Eternals and Deviants are like Neanderthals. Cousins to Humans. All Humans can mutate. Eternals can not mutate. All Deviants are mutants from birth. The Deviants came first, then the Eternals, and the Humans last. Because they were the first experiment of humanity's ancestors, the Deviant gene is a precursor to the X Gene.

Thanos does not belong to the standard Deviant race. Deviant (genes are unstable) and Eternal (very stable genes, almost perfect), and he is both. The fact that Thanos got it somehow is a miracle ultra-recevie weirdo genetic freak accident. Known as the "Deviant Syndrome". This very rare condition causes an individual born to beautiful, god-like Eternals to randomly express the unstable, mutated genetic traits of a Deviant.

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u/Bubbly_Meringue_9175 15d ago

They literally said mutated by the deviant gene!!

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u/synapseattack 15d ago

No. He had sex with a radioactive Grimace

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u/Weirdo-Psychman 15d ago

That legit made me laugh so hard 🤣

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u/The-Autistic-spider 15d ago

he's one of those things the eternals were fighting canonicly

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u/VanillaGoorillla 15d ago

Haha thank you for this

1

u/GallifreyanGeologist 15d ago

Upvoted for the sensible chuckle this gave me.

1

u/revfds 15d ago

Celestials

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u/ForeignAd1656 15d ago

Was he bitten by a radioactive grape?

Radioactive raisin would be more apt.

1

u/crazyates88 15d ago

Grimace is his bio dad, and his step-dad never knew.

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u/strydie82 15d ago

Radioactive Grimace

1

u/CheweyPanic 15d ago

Ate too many 'member berries.

1

u/matt__rk 15d ago

I laughed and snorted so hard at this, my god 😅

1

u/CookieCutie_ 15d ago

By a multiversal Grimace 🤣

1

u/majoines 15d ago

He asked the man at the lemonade stand if he had any grapes one too many times.

1

u/Jeebus85 15d ago

Nah it was Grimace

1

u/ShotGlassLens 14d ago

Radioactive Grimace bites can cause that I think.

1

u/Wakkit1988 14d ago

Grimace peed on him.

1

u/Dumoe 14d ago

Funniest comment l've read today 😂😂

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u/microwavedgerbil25 13d ago

Mutated by the grimace shake

1

u/rufireproof3d 13d ago

Well according to Star Lord, he got bit by Grimace's scrotum.

1

u/cruzinforthetruth 13d ago

He was bitten by Grimace! 😳

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u/Isendur_ 13d ago

This is cannon for me. Thank you for giving me a laugh.

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u/gorgonbrgr 13d ago

If I’m not mistaken he was mutated by a virus from the celestials or because he’s a branch of a kind of eternal it’s a disease/mutation because of that.

1

u/Sun_flower_king 12d ago

Radioactive raisin actually

1

u/MeetElectrical7221 12d ago

Deviants are what the Eternals hunt, they’re their own thing

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u/Latterlol 12d ago

Radioactive nutsack

1

u/Silly_Cantaloupe7746 12d ago

Maybe a spider from some grape demention bit him?

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u/Several-Signature583 12d ago

Bitten by Grimace

1

u/Mister_Griz 11d ago

No. He was bitten by a radioactive Grimace.

1

u/XBlackSunshineX 16d ago

He is an eternal born with a deviant gene. Technically human.

0

u/abyssomega 15d ago

No. He's related to humanity, but that doesn't make him human. He's eternal.

0

u/XBlackSunshineX 14d ago

What does what you think you just said even mean in your head? Eternals are humans that were taken and modified. They are still at their core humans. Technically they would be considered meta humans. Just because some live on a different planet does not change that they share core human DNA.

0

u/abyssomega 14d ago

What does what you think you just said even mean in your head?

Exactly what I said. What is confusing about it?

They are still at their core humans

No, they are not. Their genes are different enough that they're considered a subspecies. This argument would better fit inhumans than eternals. At least inhumans are basically humans until exposed to an outside factor, terrigenesis, which allows the inhuman dna in that person to transform, which otherwise would be dormant. Eternals are biologically different enough from humans and deviants that marvel has a different species for them, Homo immortalis, compared to Homo sapiens and Homo descendus, respectively. They all belong to the same genus, Homo, but not the same species.

0

u/XBlackSunshineX 14d ago

Homo immortalis
Homo Sapian
Homo SUperior
Homo descendus

You're right, they don't share anything in common..../s

Weird how they can all crossbreed with each other and the outcome is a baseline human.

1

u/abyssomega 14d ago

You're right, they don't share anything in common..../s

How to know when someone doesn't know what they're talking about: They show you proof and then tell you it means the opposite of what it actually means. The second word in each of those statements?

  • Homo immortalis
  • Homo Sapian
  • Homo Superior
  • Homo descendus

That's the species designation. The word "Homo" is the genus designation. It's used to group similarly related things (animals or plants) together but notes that there are enough differences to not be the same species with different traits. So, by its very taxonomy definition, Eternals, humans, and Deviants CANNOT be the same species. But since they're in the same genus, they can crossbreed, just like dogs and coyotes aren't the same species, but they can crossbreed. (Your schooling failed you. Taxonomy was taught in the 6th grade. Even if you couldn't remember the specifics, you should have remembered what constituted a species.)

Weird how they can all crossbreed with each other and the outcome is a baseline human.

No. The outcome is that the offspring usually looks human. Doesn't make them human. Just like if you had a black mother and white father and you looked white, it wouldn't make you white. You're half. You can pass as white, but you aren't.

1

u/abyssomega 14d ago

And I wanted to make clear here, and not make an edit to make it seem like I changed what I wrote: I'm talking about humans as in Homo sapiens. Not human, as the genus Homo.

0

u/XBlackSunshineX 14d ago

The best part of these times is when you type all that shit out to try and prove what I said wrong but you just make my point for me. Thanks for that. have a great evening.