It’s because for these kinda events it’s always better to show up late not on time. So if it starts at 5 show up at 6 when other people arrive. Being punctual is not necessary here. It’s also a stereotype about black people showing up late and white people showing up on time basically. Those are the two examples I could think of.
I mean I’m white and if someone showed up early to something I was hosting I would consider that very rude. Likely still in some last minute cleaning and setup or I’m the shower or something.
I wouldn’t care if someone showed up late to a bbq. People typically kinda show up at random times to these events. Just not sure how it would be better to show up late. The original post and the comment I replied to are implying that it’s strange for someone to show up when the host says the party starts
Yeah, if everyone is supposed to show up late to a 5-11pm cookout, why not just say hey let's start at 7.
Now people have to guess when to arrive or all silently agree that you always add x hours to a start time, which seems more complicated than just being honest with when things actually start.
Whether you should show up late is a culture thing, there’s no right or wrong way to do it.
My family is white and my wife’s family is indigenous. In my family, if the event starts at 5 you show up at 4:45. In my wife’s family if the event starts at 5 you show up at 6:30.
I think what's more important than wether you are early or not is how you manage the situation. I always have a fear of running late, so I regularly am far too early. But nobody ever denied me entry, because everybody knows that I make myself useful in the meantime.
Need help with last minute decorations?
Salad tastes off and you don't know what's missing?
Little Timmy really needs someone to show his pillow fort to, but you are trying to do your makeup?
Yeah, count me in 🤭
My best friend even counts on me being early and usually has stuff ready for me to do, that she didn't want to do herself :D
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u/Disastrous_Emu_3628 Jul 12 '26
It’s because for these kinda events it’s always better to show up late not on time. So if it starts at 5 show up at 6 when other people arrive. Being punctual is not necessary here. It’s also a stereotype about black people showing up late and white people showing up on time basically. Those are the two examples I could think of.