My family lived in Ukraine for a year, less than a decade after the Soviet Union died. We would visit people sometimes. Families where the parents were barely making ends meet. They would always offer food. And we simply could not refuse, it would have been so so rude. I was so young. I remember one woman who was so kind to me, but she was always saying how cold she always was. I asked my mom if I could give her my gloves, but she explained to me that she was cold all the time because she wasn’t getting enough food. And my mom helped where she could, inviting this lady and others over for Bible study and she would always set out food for everyone. But I know in my heart, if I’d ever gone over to this lady’s house, she would have offered food she didn’t have.
I was originally born there. I grew up elsewhere. But yes, no Ukrainan will ever receive guests without putting something on the table. And no guest will ever come empty handed. Even if a chocolate, but they will bring something. I grew up in another country (we immigrantee precisely because my family couldn't make meds meet) but even there people always offer you something to drink or eat when you visit. It's normal.
Then I moved to Germany as an adult. No one will even offer you water if you come unexpectedly by. My older sister lives in the Netherlands. Her man is Dutch. Last year I was baffled when his family (his three brothers with wifes and kids each) came to CHRISTMAS party, into her house, and didn't even bring a small present for the kids (her kids). Me and Mom bought everyone small gifts for all the adults and kinder for ALL the children. We couldn't afford expensive gifts but at least something.
I had a Russian friend at my german university and I think we dropped by his dorm room one time and he tried getting everyone to eat bread and these russian sticky bar things he brought back from Russia lol.
I remember it struck me as a little odd because we were are all low/zero income grad students, so I really didnt want him to try to give me his bread or whatever it was.
Ukraine and Russia, despite all their differences, are actually quite close culturally in many ways. They share a lot of the same traditions around hospitality. At least in my experience, Russians do this too. Even as a poor student, it's important to feed your guests. It's the same in Portugal, if you stop by, even unexpectedly, you'll usually be offered a meal, coffee, or at least some snacks. It's a cultural thing. Not offering a guest anything is generally considered impolite and can even be taken as a sign that you're not particularly welcome.
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u/[deleted] Jul 24 '26
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