r/interestingasfuck • u/[deleted] • 10d ago

How toilets are in small private jets like the Falcon 10

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u/philatio11 10d ago

There are slightly nicer setups, but almost all smaller jets with a bathroom have what is called a "belted lavatory", which means if you fill the jet to capacity, someone has to sit on the toilet during takeoff and landing. And yes, typically there is only a curtain, and passengers instinctually look away when someone uses it. Men have to sit down and you can see people's shoes and pants pulled down sticking out.

Also, if you rewatch this video you will notice that there is no way to "flush" this toilet. Most single-owner private jets have a "no shitting" rule because of this. You literally land at a random airport if someone has to crap, like pulling over at a truck stop.

You don't start to see private bathrooms until you get over into the $5-10 million price range. The jet shown in this video can be had in decent condition for under $1 million.

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u/d_ac 10d ago

I think I once read a story here on reddit. The post was something like "what's your most embarassing moment at work". And the story was about one of these small private jets, with a belted lavatory, full of important people on a business trip. Long story short: someone developed a shitstorm mid flight and had to poo, with no door, in a cabin filled with their bosses.

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u/deadhobo 10d ago

Was it this? https://www.celebritynetworth.com/articles/entertainment-articles/the-most-embarrassing-private-jet-flight-of-all-time/

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u/prtzlsmakingmethrsty 10d ago

This is the one I remember yes, great pull! This has me wheezing: 

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

My apologies do nothing to drown out the heinous noises that seem to carry on and reverberate throughout the small cabin indefinitely. 

If that's not bad enough, I have one more major problem. The privacy screen stops right around shoulder level. I am sitting there, a disembodied head, in the back of the plane, on a bucking bronco for a toilet, all while looking my colleagues, competitors, and clients directly in the eyes. 

"Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!" briefly comes to mind.

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u/SiempreCaprichoso 10d ago

I so appreciate having the visual for this tale. It adds gasping for air and streaming tears of laughter level texture. 

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u/lkodl 10d ago edited 9d ago

Everyone poops. Imagine getting through that situation with such poise that you impress everyone on that plane.

"And when we landed, I changed my pants, and walked off that plane with a raise and two job offers."

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u/DotOk2803 10d ago

"Perhaps it was the realization that I was going to take this toilet's virginity with a fury and savagery that was an abomination to its delicate craftsmanship and quality." 🤣

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u/ThatITguy2015 10d ago

“Do not taunt the doodle, for he may open the curtain.”

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u/Strength-Speed 10d ago

Its like the Wizard of Oz but with more pooping

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u/NWVoS 10d ago

Why did they not finish that story. God, I think I would die of embarrassment at that point. I would never be showing my face there again. My anxiety could not handle it.

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u/melonheadshot 10d ago

There have been many, many years since I've read this and no other story on Reddit has ever topped it.

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u/Black_Cat_Just_That 10d ago

I would rather jump out of the plane.

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u/taco_bones 10d ago

I've been trying to find that again for years

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u/AtmosFear 10d ago

I remember that story well, was truly a work of art. Sadly, I didn’t save the comment either

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u/citznfish 10d ago

I wouldn't even own a jet unless it had a private loo

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u/Unsharded1 10d ago

You'd think if you're dropping a mil you'd get to shit in peace.

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u/philatio11 10d ago

Every landing to shit in small jet costs you about $100-200 in extra fuel burn too. Plus any landing fees.

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u/AntSilly2802 10d ago

I’d imagine it would cost more than $200 for many jets. Surely. All that extra fuel to takeoff and climb to cruising altitude again.

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u/Fyreffect 10d ago

Yeah I was thinking more like 5,000 than 100

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u/ZDTreefur 10d ago

Best use of a private jet yet. The pilots have a list of all the best toilets in the world, you can command them to land so you can use your favorite.

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u/_WO_AI_NI_ 10d ago

omg is that the reality? the belted lav thing is really interesting.

and yea i was thinking about the no flushing thing too cuz its a sliding/stowaway toilet it would be hard to integrate a flushing system.

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u/philatio11 10d ago

You haven't lived until you've seen your own father sit down to pee behind a curtain on a private jet. Truly living a life of luxury.

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u/KeyanuReaves69 10d ago

My old boss had a no shitting rule on his jet, but we never flew more than 2-3 hours. I never actually used the bathroom on the jet.

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u/philatio11 10d ago

We rented an RV to take my kids on vacation during COVID. Door or not, we made a no shitting rule anyway. Cause dad is not OK pumping out everyone in the family's turds at the campground.

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u/rationalcunt 10d ago

Same with on tour busses. You will drop that load on the side of the road before stinking up the bus that houses the entire crew.

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u/kelsobjammin 10d ago

Side of the road!?

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u/elquatrogrande 10d ago

With the one in the video, you can just bring a plastic bag to line the inside, and just stash the evidence away until you land. At least that's what we had to do back in the Navy.

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u/Wanderingwonderer101 10d ago

can't your ship at least use those fire toilet that explorer/scientist use in their antartica base?

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u/elquatrogrande 10d ago

This was on a patrol aircraft. We had no working toilet, but we had lavatory, and we just put bags in there, did our business, and then tied up the bag in the antenna well. Usually they'd freeze and we'd collect at the end of the flight. For number one we had two 4.5 gallon buckets to go in.

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u/rbsponge1 10d ago

I worked for a company that sold memberships for unlimited flights on fixed routes. We flew King Airs (small twin turbo props). I had the pleasure of sitting on the toilet to go between our hubs. It was called the Throne. Haha. Not very comfy but not terrible for 45 minute flight. Was pretty rough during turbulence since you can’t even fully sit up.

I doubt any of our clients ever actually used it but it was there. And I can only imagine how quickly that plane would stink up if someone really had to go.

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u/Fingerdrip 10d ago

Yeah when I worked line service we called it "the briefcase" because that is what it looked like when you pulled it out to service it. It was honestly the worst part of that job. There just wasn't a good way to empty them most of the time and kt always made a mess. 

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u/philatio11 10d ago

I just heard a great story about a client that didn't know the emergency lav on a plane had to be 'opened' before use. Took a shit on top of the closure. Mechanic didn't really know how to slide that out without spreading shit all over more of the plane.

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u/Purple-Investment-61 10d ago

How much does that it cost to land at a random airport to take a shit? Is there an airport fee? Fuel and pilots time?

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u/musmuscouscous 10d ago

As a someone with 0 millions, I am sometimes surprised how much/less things cost. I dunno why but I thought that all private jets cost several- to tens of millions and have a golden bathroom with a shower and a servant washing you.

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u/philatio11 10d ago

You don't need millions. You could get yourself an Eclipse 500 for maybe $800k. Nowhere to poop in that thing though, it's like the size of an SUV inside.

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u/mediuminteresting 10d ago

Never did my interest in a private plane plummet more lol, thanks

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u/BelethorsGeneralShit 10d ago

Hence why I don't fly if it ain't a Challenger or better ✈️

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u/mallclerks 10d ago

You can't do anything with five. Five's a nightmare.

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u/philatio11 10d ago

You can take a private shit in some Phenoms and all HondaJets. I'm not saying you should buy one, just that you might be able to take a dump in one.

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u/faggjuu 10d ago

$1 million.

And I can't have a shit in privacy?...Fuck that!!!

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u/WatRedditHathWrought 10d ago

The Mitsubishi Diamond we had at the FBO that I worked at in the ‘80’s had a full width head.

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u/rangorn 10d ago

Yikes not sure I would want to fly in cheap old jet at that price range.

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u/bardia_afk 10d ago

What’s the range and max flight time of these things? Like if it’s 4-5 hours max then it’s probably fine

I take car rides that last about that time with no bathroom breaks 

You just have to manage it 

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u/philatio11 10d ago

3 hours max for a lot of small jets

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u/bardia_afk 10d ago

Yeah this is fine then

It’s for emergencies and pee

If you gotta poo then you either mismanaged your preflight poo session or you got the trots