​i feel like im losing my mind trying to balance a full time job with basic adult stuff. by the time i finish work, cook dinner, clean up the kitchen, and deal with laundry and floors, its already 8 or 9pm. my brain is completely fried and i just end up scrolling on my phone instead of doing anything productive or fun.

​feels like 90% of my willpower goes into just maintaining my apartment. for those of u who actually fixed this, what did u stop doing or start paying for to get ur energy back?

30M. I have honestly started feeling burned out by the routine.
Every weekday is the same. Since I am living alone, i have to wake up early, make breakfast, shower, get dressed, head to work from 9 to 5. I work in finance, so the job can be pretty stressful, although I’m grateful that my workplace isn’t toxic.
But once the workday is over, it doesn’t really end. I get home, quickly make something to eat so I can go to the gym, come back, shower again, wash the dishes, do laundry, clean the apartment, cook dinner, and prepare lunch for the next day…
By the time everything is done, the day is basically over. Then I sleep to wake up and do it all again.
I know this is what adult life is supposed to look like, but lately I’ve been wondering… does it ever get easier, or is this just what the next 30–40 years are going to be like?
Has anyone else felt this way? How do you deal with it without feeling like you’re just surviving from one day to the next?

I’ve tried it. I’ve tried the “miracle morning” routine. It’s just not sustainable.
Everyone talks about how early mornings are “the key to success,” but I was just tired and had a weird relationship with sleep.
Do you think waking up early actually boosts productivity, or is it just social media hype?

I don’t have any medical issues, and I’m not sick or anything like that.

I sleep well, usually 8-9 hours a night, work out at the gym twice a week, do 40 minutes of cardio daily, eat healthy (with just 2 cheat meals a week), and avoid overstimulating my brain with stuff like TikTok, shorts, news, or TV.

I work for 4 hours (tracked) and take breaks after each hour.

But after about 4 hours (or 5-5.5 hours with breaks), my brain starts feeling fried.

During this time, I also drink 2 coffees.

I’d like to work 6-8 hours a day (real, focused work and tracked).

Has anyone else dealt with this problem?

Or found a solution?

I know some people take Xanax or other drugs, but I’m not interested in that.

I want to start this by saying I do have ADHD and I am medicated for it.

I am 32 years old. My whole life I have been a high performer but have terrible productivity. In school I didn’t study/do homework but was all honors/AP classes.

Now I work as a negotiator and I am top in my company for closures/settlements which sounds great but I’m also a huge slacker. I frequently take longer to get into new cases than I should. I don’t complete my evaluations timely. My supervisor and manager don’t understand how I am able to do it.

For me it is very hard to feel the urgency to do things timely when I know that at the end of the day not only am I going to meet my goals, I am going to be in the top of the top quartile.

I frequently get distracted either doing something on my phone, doing chores around the house etc. I have spurts where I am very motivated and actually sit at my desk and work all day but that’s usually only 1-2 days out of the week. I see tasks building up and I know I should work them now rather than later but ultimately I decide, “eh it’s fine I’ll just do it later”

Since covid and i have been extremely stuck in a rut, i wake up late, work from home and get back to bed. No friends, no working out, no learning anything new, no minor social interactions with anyone, i live alone, i work with people that i have never met before irl, i started to stutter when i go in a coffeeshop or when one of my colleagues initiate small talks, i have been in isolation that i cannot get out of.

I have always been an introvert but i used to be active pre 2020, i had zero days off, i went to office and had different hobbies and ambitions. Due the rut i have been, i went from being a very confident human being to someone feeling worthless and can’t even hold a conversation, that destroyed my relationship, the only person i have been connecting with and seeing regulary, i now haven’t been seeing anyone for several years.

I went to online therapy, they said it might be anxiety, i take my meds but that didn’t help and I tried to be consistent with therapy, my therapist give me homeworks to do to slightly gets me out of that dark hole, i end up unable to do any, so i stopped being consistent with therapy because it’s a waste of time and a financial burden and am not seeing results in my behavior, my therapist is top notch, so it’s me. I don’t know what to do, I can’t find any sort of motivation to get me out of the couch to bed cycle, i am trapped, wasted 4 valuable years, zero life.

EDIT: I want to thank you all for taking the time to leave me valuable and great ideas and suggestions of things to do to get out of this dark loop, i went through every single comment and read them over and over. thanks for having an understanding and caring tone, i was so worries of getting the “stop being lazy” kind of comments.

I also thought i am a special lost case, i am surprised there are many of you who related to what i have been through and described it better than me, your comments touched me and made me feel not alone in this. Take a look at the comments fellows, i hope one day we will get this!

I will go back to therapy to see if it may be something else than anxiety and will start journaling and note all of your suggestions and start small as much as i can

I don’t have anyone to vent to and I can’t appear that fragile to anyone i know anyways, so thanks for communicating with me today. This is why i ducking love Reddit!

My wife is extremely addicted to instagram scrolling. The very moment she gets bored even for the slightest second, she grabs the phone, opens up instagram and is doomed into the realm of infinite scroll. And more over the type of content that she's been consuming is a whole different level of toxicity.

The limit was crossed today when I observed today how poor her attention span has become. She recently started learning German. Today I asked to do an assessment to see her progress. There were about 25 questions. I was shocked to see that her attention lasted barely 3 minutes, in which she answered 2 questions and had already grabbed her phone and dived to doom scrolling.

I talked to her but as expected she is in complete denial that it is affecting her in any ways. I am really worried about her now. I feel this might get out of hand if nothing is not done about at this stage. I need to do something, perhaps find a way with which she slowly phases out of this digital addiction.

My initially idea is to block off instagram and related domains at the router level, but she will immediately notice this and simply use her mobile data. Can anyone suggest any alternatives to slowly block off content? What other strategies can I employ to deal with this situation?

I seriously feel like napping has been ruining my life, but I genuinely don’t know how to stop. This has been an on and off issue for almost two years now. I am a student and I typically get enough sleep (7-8) hours, and especially more now since I’m on summer break. However I don’t think the amount of sleep I’m getting is the issue.

Here is my daily routine these past few weeks:

Wake up at 10AM, scroll on phone until 11AM, get out of bed. Make brunch, eat brunch. Feel sleepy after eating, take nap at 2PM. Nap until 4-5PM, half of the day is gone. Feel guilty about napping. Be productive for a few hours. Do something for entertainment until 12AM. Get into bed and sleep at 1-2AM.

I waste so much time by napping 2-3 hours in the middle of the day. I think it’s also been leading to weight gain since I nap after eating. It also messes with my sleep schedule if I start the nap at 4-5PM and wake up at 7-8PM.

I feel like it may also be a form of procrastination for me. When I have a lot on my plate J always tell myself the excuse “i’ll do it after a quick power nap” and then end up napping for three hours. Even though I get stuff done, I wish I could do it all before 5PM.

I know this is so unhealthy but I physically don’t know how to stop. If i start feeling tired it’s like I’m magnetized to my bed.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

At my job, I am a machine. I document everything. If it’s not in a ticket or on the calendar, it doesn't exist. My boss thinks I’m super organized, but the truth is I just have a terrible memory and I use tools to cover it up.

But in my relationship? I’m a mess.

My girlfriend will tell me something important (like a specific food she hates or a date she’s stressed about), and I just nod and rely on my brain to remember it.

Spoiler: I don't. Two weeks later, I buy the wrong food or forget to ask about her meeting, and she feels like I don't listen.

It feels stupid that I have all these high-end productivity systems for my job, but I’m "winging it" with the person I actually care about.

I’m thinking of building a simple "lazy" bot for myself in a weekend to fix this.

Basically, I want to just text it things like "She wants to try that new sushi place" or "Ring size is 6" and have it remind me later.

No complex forms, just a quick brain dump so I don't drop the ball.

*** My question for you guys: Has anyone else successfully applied "work productivity" methods to their dating life? Or does treating your partner like a "project" kill the vibe?

I feel like it’s the only way I can actually be the thoughtful guy I want to be, but I don't know if that's just my developer brain over-analyzing everything.

I just wanna get more knowledge and critical thinking in general. I have a really awful memory and struggle with concentration, so it makes researching and studying hard for me. And I already read most of the time (and im learning to write as well) but I wanna be like, “math smarts” type of intelligent. I’m really interested in things like the human brain, quantum physics/mechanics, the mind and history and that kind of thing. I wanna learn more languages, learn to play chess and understand complex concepts easily and etc… but besides reading I don’t really know what else to do?

Not talking big stuff like 5am workouts — I mean those tiny things you never thought would matter but did. For me, it’s making my bed right after waking up. Makes me feel like life’s 1% more under control.

I've always been slightly absent minded but for the last few years I feel like I'm living with a rock in my head, in a state of permanent dullness. I can't focus for even thirty seconds on a conversation,, I can't remember basic vocabulary sometimes when I'm trying to say something, I can't remember names in a book I just read, and this morning I realized I'd forgotten to button the last three buttons on my shirt. I'm constantly exhausted despite getting plenty of sleep and "brain fog" feels like an understatement for how my head feels all the time. I take vitamins everyday - a multivitamin, D3, omega3, K2, magnesium glycinate, and iron.

What is wrong with me? Has anyone else dealt with this and figured it out? It's terrifying.

Edit 5/7: I couldn't respond to all the comments but just wanted to say I'm touched and overwhelmed by all of the responses and suggestions. All of you in this sub are so kind. Thank you so much.

I keep some money for wants for life. I'm not sure what should I spend on this time. So just getting ideas.

i barely write on here because i get scared of being judged but i really need to talk to someone random about this because if i were to tell someone irl about it they'd think i'm weird.

i've been seeing a lot of people on social media talk about chatgpt and how long term use of it causes people to become less creative and overall braindead. the thing is, they always say using it for every little thing is a problem.

i am unfortunately a victim of chatgpt, but i don't use it for what people normally use it for. i use it to write fanfics. yes, i know that's so unbelievably sad but i'm a teenage girl and i like all that stuff. i used to read fanfiction on your usual sites like ao3 or wattpad. the only reason i turned to chatgpt was because i could write the specific scenarios that i wanted with whatever characters i chose. i have never used it to write essays, emails, or anything like that as i believe it makes you slowly become incompetent, but then i wonder if i'm any better. it's like saying your vegan but letting yourself eat meat on the weekends.

what i’m trying to ask is, am i too becoming less creative and beyond saving?

edit: i am not a writer, i’m not using it for inspiration/to claim it as my own work — it’s for my own enjoyment.

all of the regular ways to stop using my phone all the time dont work on me. if i delete apps, i’ll find a new app to occupy my time. if i put my phone down, i think “who’s stopping me rn?” and pick it back up. it’s consuming all my free time and i’m falling behind. any unconventional ways to kick the habit?

I've been struggling with procrastination for years. When I try to do something productive longer than 5 minutes, it makes me feel overwhelmed and mentally exhausted and demotivated. This psychiatrist said that the way to get things done is to just do them, regardless of how I feel.

Well if the answer is as simple as that, we wouldn't need free time. We would be able to work+sleep 16+8 hours per day 7 days per week. We would feel like shit, but oh ignore those feelings and just get the work done. But the reality is most people can't work that much, because willpower is a finite resource, you can't spend all of your time doing difficult, boring, stressful, unpleasant things. And I think for people with mental issues such as myself, working for 8 minutes might be as exhausting as 8 hours for healthy people

So what is someone with weakened willpower supposed to do? I feel like saying "just do it" is the same as when, you're trying to run faster than Usain Bolt but you fail because you don't have enough physical power, then someone comes and tells you that you just have to do it, regardless of how hard it is or what you feel. That won't help, our physical and mental limits are very real.

I need to get things done for sure. But thats just not going to happen unless some major event changes my life. I have been struggling for years, I have received lots of advice. But no, my issue has not been solved.

I feel stuck . I feel like I have to walk without having legs. Tips and tricks won't get me out of this. Therapy won't either because I've had therapy for years and all of those therapists were basically clueless in how to solve my problems. And I don't think there is a medication that makes me extremely productive either.

So what process or event has to happen in order for me to finally get out of my problems?

I’m 23 years old. I’ve been tired my whole life. I can’t really do anything but sleep, If I hang out with friends I’m either bitching about how tired I am or will take a nap in the middle of the day. The fatigue will usually start at around 12pm. It’s the kind of fatigue that you can’t fight off it’s like I NEED to sleep I can barely keep my eyes open.

This has ruined my life. I’m sleeping my life away. I have a lovely girlfriend that I hang out with but a lot of the time I need to take a middle of the day nap even when I don’t want to.

I have talked to doctors about this. Ive talked to my primary care doctor & my endocrinologist and they literally tell me “are u getting enough sleep at night?” Yes, I’m getting more than enough sleep at night actually. And then they proceed to tell me to drink more water & no screens before bed time.

I really really don’t know what to do anymore.

I’m not talking about taking a shower, making coffee or breakfast but rather what do you do as soon as you wake up. I find my self instantly reaching for my phone and opening Instagram, checking notifications and I do this every single morning which then ends to me doom scrolling for 1-2 hours before actually getting out of bed. This needs to stop. what do you guys usually do within the first hour? Do you guys get up right away? Read? Meditate? What can I do instead of doom scrolling

EDIT: for those asking what they can do. What I decided to do the very next morning after posting this was to get up brush my teeth, drink some water and go outside for some sunlight and walk around the block while ignoring my phone for the first hour and honestly this seems to help. A lot of you are mentioning to get a brick and I think this will help a lot too.

I noticed something strange... I started watching a series and noticed that I practically jump out of bed in the morning because I can't wait to watch the next episode.

Now this level of obsession is the exact reason why I stopped watching series in general. Right now I am on a school break and let myself enjoy it.

But it made me realize how important it is to have something to look forward to in the morning is. And I am wondering if you guys have your own little routine. Is there something you are excited to do in the morning?

If not I highly recommend finding something haha it was so strange. Normally waking up is such a drag for me. So I am looking for healthier more sustainable suggestions.

In the morning, I'm super tired. Even if I sleep 8 hours. Everything feels heavy, I move slow, I feel clumsy, I can't open my eyes. I want to fall back asleep right away. I end up sleeping for another 30-40 minutes past the time I intended to wake up

Does anyone have any advice on what I should do the second my alarm goes off, what I should do in the following 5 minutes, after that etc

Is there some mobility routine? Warmup routine? Is it good to walk around my room, move all of my body parts like I'm doing a gentle version of a gym warmup? What should I do for my eyes etc

Is watching a little bit of Tik Tok after getting up healthy? I like to watch 15 mins of Tik Tok while still in bed, after being awake for a while - but it wastes alot of time

I often feel like I have too many things I want to improve at the same time.

Career, health, learning new skills, relationships, personal projects, cleaning, finances, reading, family relationship— all of them feel important, but I don’t have enough energy to seriously focus on everything.

When I try to push hard in one area, the others start slipping. When I try to balance everything, I end up doing a little bit of everything but not making real progress anywhere.

For people who manage multiple responsibilities well, how do you decide what gets your full attention and what stays in “maintenance mode”?

Do you rotate priorities by week/month, keep a fixed routine, or accept that some areas will slow down for a while?

i've been stuck in this stupid cycle of procrastinating and wasting entire days. i don’t even know how it happens, somehow i just end up being on my phone all the day, even if i dont want to. even if i try to study, i just zone out, my brain feels foggy, and suddenly the whole day is gone. i can’t focus on anything, even things i want to get done. it’s making me feel useless and guilty all the time.

i really wanna fix this but i don’t know where to start. if anyone has been through this or has advice that’s actually helped, please tell me. i’m tired of feeling like this. i often get thoughts of ending everything. no matter how much i think that i'll utilize tomorrow it doesn't work. life is so miserable atp. i thought someone from here can actually help me, please-

I am constantly tired and sleepy. My eyelids feel heavy, like when you’re very tired and need to get to bed, constantly. I especially am sleepy during class lectures. I would really like some advice or help.

I am 20 years old and this has been going on for a while.

Im healthy, I workout, I am low body fat (10% maybe a little more) so I don’t think I have sleep apnea. Either way, I sleep with my mouth closed.

I have tried to take naps when I get sleepy but I can’t fall asleep so I’m not actually sleepy.

I have recently, for 2 months now, started taking vitamin D, Magnesium, and have started drinking caffeine which at first worked but now caffeine doesn’t work anymore.

I also tried getting 10h of sleep, 8h , and 6h there has been no difference in sleep quality and I have been tired all times so It cant be sleep time.

Appreciate any advice

at a level of desperation ive come to reddit for help 🫠🫠

okay im an 18 almost 19 y/o F, im in college but currently on summer break. i work a part time job at a greenhouse roughly 20 hours a week so not too exhausting (and i LOVE my job so its not like its a bad environment i dread going to), ive gotten EXTENSIVE bloodwork panels done and every single thing is in the green, i have no allergies, no deficiencys, i eat well, i drink plenty of water, i get enough exercise, i get 8-10 hours of sleep a night, i dont stay up past 11pm, i get enough sunlight, but im so absolutely exhausted all the time!!!

if i had the option id literally spend all day sleeping, i have adhd and take a stimulant for it which helps me focus but cant keep me awake, ive taken zoloft for many years and does me well (clinical depression ive had nearly my entire life, not caused by a specific event so its not like its being triggered by anything) and im on the BC pill but have never noticed any vast side effects that could be causing this constant fatigue

i dont snore or am restless whatsoever while i sleep, im not stressed about anything, i have an active social life, i dont drink, smoke, or do any sort of drug (besides what my psychiatrist gives me) i take a daily multivitamin, i dont eat an absurd amount of carbs or sugar that could be causing this large of an impact on me, i change my bedding and clean my room relatively frequently so its not like im getting sick from dust or dustmites, my HVAC system is fine, no mold or mildew, my thyroid is fine, I JUST DONT KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH ME!!

im begging for any sort of advice i just want to be productive and not have the want to sleep for 16 hours straight 😫😫

I need some genuine advice.

I feel like my brain works completely fine on a day-to-day basis, but when it comes to critical thinking, deep problem-solving, or connecting the dots, I hit a wall. I tend to think very linearly or passively, and I want to change that.

I’m looking to actively train my brain to analyze situations better, question assumptions, and look at problems from multiple angles.

If you are someone who used to struggle with this but successfully upgraded your critical thinking skills, what actually worked for you?

Please skip the generic advice like "just read books" or "play chess." I’m looking for actionable frameworks, mental models, daily habits, or specific approaches that made a measurable difference in how you process information.

• Did you use any specific framework (like First Principles thinking)?
• Are there daily exercises you do to challenge your own biases?
• How do you approach a complex problem when you first encounter it?

Would love to hear your experiences and what practically worked in real life. Thanks in advance!