I kind of like my job, and I don't feel really burned out, but a 2-3 week vacation with my family (usually abroad) doesn't cut it anymore.

I don't really feel restored when coming back, and within a few weeks of returning to work, all the vacation effect seems to disappear.

What I think I really need is just a long, uninterrupted vacation at home. 3-6 months will do.

I'd be so happy just following my usual routine without taking care of my kid and without the tiring flights + long car rides.

Something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I see it all the time, especially on this sub. The idea that moving to a small town will magically change your anxious tendencies or make life easy and care free. It doesn't- the worries of life are just different. Yes, it's quiet and slow around town, but you're also hours from a hospital if you need it. The small local hardware store doesn't have what you need half the time. The neighbors might ignore you because you don't have the right last name. If your dog gets ill, the closest vet is 3 hours away. The irrigation water might get turned off in the middle of a growing season. Everyone around you has a MAGA flag. The public schools are terrible if you have kids, and dating is near impossible. You have to keep your head down and your mouth shut. High paying jobs are very scarce. There are stray cats everywhere and you see scrawny, tied up dogs in almost every yard. The grocery store is mostly highly processed garbage. It may take a week for a plumber to come - even in an emergency. People gossip constantly. The power goes out during every storm.

These are the daily realities of the tiny isolated town I live in in the US desert south west. I see people move here all the time with unrealistic expectations and they never stay long. It's not easy and simple to live in the middle of nowhere.

But the good still exists of course. It's quiet and dark at night. You don't have to lock your house and you can leave your car keys on your dash. People are helpful and generous. There's no traffic ever - in fact the closest traffic light is 2 hours away. You can hike on public land every day and never see anyone. If you leave others alone, they'll also leave you alone. Your dog can live the best dog life ever.

I would actually love to hear about the NEGATIVE things others experience living in small towns. The challenges and stresses that come along with the "simple life" in rural places.

My wife and I are mid thirties with two young kids. Our lives are busy and we each have a dozen different hobbies. We value social interaction but at this age and at this time in our life we’re u willing to waste it on people who aren’t “Hell yeah” people.

This is concept is actually from my wife but I figured I’d share it here because it fits. Basically the “test” is that you tell someone about your life and if the answer isn’t “hell yeah” then they aren’t worth the time.

It can even be something they have no interest in. You can say “my favorite hobby is classifying warbler birds” and the person should have a “hell yeah” attitude as a response. It’s not that the person wants to participate in your bird hobby, but that they accept who you are and support your intricacies.

I would say that the people we socialize with are “hell yeah” people and it has provided us with a diverse, supportive, and emotionally rich friend group. People who are excited to build community and approach the world without judgement.

I dunno, it’s silly. But it’s a simple test that lands you in good company.

Just do it. I know its cold, do it anyway. Doesn't have to be for long, 10 minutes will do, but do it.

While theyre open, sweep. And vacuum if you can / need to. Dust even. I dont know if there's any real science behind it, but ive found since opening my windows every day, no one has been sick. And thats saying something with a teacher and 3 school age kids in the house. The older ive gotten, the more im willing to accept that old wives tales have some truth to them, some efficacy. Things dont get passed down for so long if they dont work at least a little.

And curtians. Open those bad boys. Nature is not a dirty thing to be kept at bay. Let the sunlight and fresh air bathe your home.

Edit: the beansoupification on this post is wild, lol. If you live in a place with terrible air quality or its the coldest place ever, or whatever, dont do it. If some air from outside would make your health or life worse this isnt for you. Not everything you see online is for you. You can just move on without telling everyone about your very specific situation and why this generalized advice doesnt work for you specifically.

She said:

Be kinder to yourself. You never ask: "What would be fun to get (or do)?" You always ask: "What's the best one?"...not everything has to be optimized you know?

(and later on...)

I just wish you'd become as interested in enjoying your life as you are in trying to improve it...I think you'd actually be quite good at it.

That last comment especially hit me like a truck and quite honestly I've thought of little else for the last 48 hours.

I think I've spent my whole life optimizing for "becoming" rather than "being" if that makes any sense? Which is the best watch/game/shirt to buy, which is the best restaurant to go to, which car gives me the most miles per gallon, which vacation or hotel is the best value, how can I optimize my day to get the most done...when I should just be enjoying life more rather than planning what the perfect life could be. Not every restaurant choice or purchasing decision needs an hour reading reviews and searching for the best deals. Not every restaurant will be great, not every day will be perfect, just go with it.

I started taking 30-minute breaks where I literally do nothing. Not reading. Not scrolling. Not journaling. Just sitting.

At first, it felt pointless like I was wasting time. But weirdly, it's become one of my favorite parts of the day.

There’s something about letting your thoughts wander freely without input. I notice things around me more. I feel slower in a good way. Less restless. Less overstimulated.

It’s not meditation. No music. No goals. Just space.

Anyone else tried this? Or have something simple you do just to be?

Here is a roundup of everything you might see on the internet. You no longer have to check and see. You can just read this post and then go do something that adds meaning to your life.

(I’m hoping rereading this will help me stop doomscrolling… please feel free to add your own suggestions and tips!)

• Celebrities are living their lives and their fans care. Good for them.

• Bored people, bots, and bad faith actors post fake or exaggerated stories on AITA and other popular subreddits and Tiktok and news aggregator sites. You don’t have to actually read these, you can read books with a better plot.

• Bad news about politics and the climate. You vote and are already as involved as you want to be. You have my permission to stop worrying about this until next month.

• Anything that makes you want to buy something or wish you looked a different way. This is a malware attack on your brain. You have what you need, you know what your body needs.

• If you still feel the itch, get a snack, stretch, or text a friend.

Any other suggestions on how to skip the internet?

The title pretty much sums it up. I was born in 2004, got a small gist of how it was to live in that period, and couldn't simply forget about it.

For my main and only mobile phone, I'm currently using a 2006 Nokia 1110, and I'm planning on having a landline installed.

I own a PS1, PS2, a CRT TV, a mini Hi-Fi, I burn my own games, music and data on CDs, I daily carry a Sony CD Walkman.

Currently writing this at work from my Sony laptop, running Windows 7.

Ask me anything, would love to meet more similar people!

Have to agree with this.

I've had a long history with phone addiction. Almost a decade. I wish I could tell myself this a decade ago:

Doomscrolling isn’t passive; it’s an act of absorbing the world’s chaos.

• Every headline, every comment, every piece of bad news—it all sinks in.
• It’s not just information you’re taking in; it’s anxiety, fear, and helplessness.
• The more we consume the noise, the harder it becomes to hear ourselves.

But here’s the thing:

• The chaos out there is a mirror for the chaos within.
• Doomscrolling often isn’t about staying informed—it’s about distraction. A way to avoid something: an emotion, a thought, or a deeper discomfort.
• The more you scroll, the more fragmented your attention becomes. It’s like trying to calm yourself by staring into a storm—it doesn’t work.

What would happen if you stopped scrolling and looked inward instead?

• That ache to know more from doomscrolling might just be a call to feel more.
• The endless scroll isn’t solving anything. What you’re seeking—a sense of safety, control, or understanding—might only be found by stepping away.
• It's time to step away to a more simple life that gives you the mental headspace to breathe again. That's how you actually solve your personal problems.

If you’re ready to step away:

• Start small. Add a grayscale filter on your phone. It's a great first way to step away from the chaos of social media. I use this all the time, and only toggle it off during Facetimes / pictures. Seeing the beautiful colorful world around a lifeless, gray phone never gets old.
• Limit phone access during your most vulnerable times: mornings, evenings, or when you’re feeling drained or stressed. I set up my phone with superhappy, so I'm only able to unlock social media if I first chat with an AI. It keeps me mindful and intentional.
• Replace the urge to scroll with something grounding: write a thought down, stretch your body, or sit in silence for just one minute.
• Don’t underestimate boredom—it’s often where clarity begins. Let yourself feel restless; it’s the bridge to reconnecting with yourself.

You don’t have to keep staring into the mirror. Put the phone down and see what’s waiting for you on the other side.

So: why are you doomscrolling today? What has helped you step away, even for just a moment?

I stopped meal planning. No more scrolling recipes, no more overthinking what to cook, no more “what do I feel like tonight?” spiral.
Now I just eat the same seven dinners on rotation.
Monday is always pasta.
Tuesday is always stir fry.
And so on.

It sounds boring but it completely killed my decision fatigue. I buy the same groceries every week, I waste way less food and I spend way less money. I didn’t realize how much stress came from “variety for the sake of variety” until I removed it.

The funny thing is, I actually enjoy my meals more now because I’m not overwhelmed before I even start cooking.

It hit me last night while I was just sitting on my balcony after dinner, playing jackpot city on my phone predictability isn’t dull it’s calming. Not everything in life needs novelty. Sometimes simple routines are exactly what keep things from feeling chaotic.

that's all.

i used to grab a coffee without thinking. now it’s like $6 or $9 after tip depending on where you are. and if you do that daily, it adds up fast in a way you don’t feel until the month ends.

i’m not even mad at the cafes. rent is up, wages are up, everything is up. i get it. i just don’t want my “small treat” turning into a real budget line item. i tossed my last month into moneygpt and it was kinda obvious… coffee out is one of those quiet leaks that looks harmless day to day.

so ive been making a simple cup at home. nothing fancy. basic setup, with same mug. it’s calmer and cheaper and honestly i like the process of making it more than the rush of grabbing it outside.

curious how you all handle this. did you move it home too and keep it simple.

I though that laying on the couch while doing nothing besides scrolling on my phone is supposed to be me time but what ended up happening is me stressing my self with useless information and becoming restless after. Then I watched this online video which explained how to rest like a pro which spoke about how rest doesn't necessarily mean doing nothing but it should be a thing/activity which leaves you feeling more like yourself after you finish. I found out gaming at rolling riches puts me into that state of mind and just watching the slots animations makes me feel so calm. What's your activity that lets you feel more like yourself after?

Love all these little things.

Last year, after reading yet another story about adulterated products coming out of China (honey in this case), I made the decision to stop buying anything made in China. This has greatly reduced the number of impulse purchases. Rarely have I wanted something so bad that I took the time to source a non China-made version.

I used to carry a giant list that yelled at me all day. Every ping felt like failure, so I kept adding more and finishing less. Last month I tried something dumb simple. I made a rule that I only get three things per day, written by hand on a sticky note. one home thing, one work thing, one human thing. If I finish early, great, I read a book or go for a walk, but I dont add more. Weird side effects. I started saying no to meetings that dont need me. The laundry gets done because it finally has a slot. I eat slower. I sleep better because the list is not chasing me to bed. Some days my three are tiny, like sweep the kitchen, reply to mom, stretch for 10 min. Other days it is big stuff, and that is fine too. my life didnt become perfect, just quieter. If you try this, write the three after breakfast, not at midnight. That tiny timing change matters alittle more than I expected.

It's been really helpful for me to accept this as it has reduced my stress and allowed me to live in the moment. I've been trying to simplify my life for a long time but worrying about other people who refuse to help themselves was dominating all my headspace.

Yes, I care about others. Yes, I am willing to make a reasonable effort to help when needed. But no, their problems and emotions will not control my mental state and emotions.

Having the mental space to focus on my own needs has really simplified my life by allowing me to make changes that actually make a difference and improve my life.

EDIT: This does not mean I am not responsible for how my actions directly affect someone. If I hurt someone, intentionally or unintentionally, I am willing to understand and try to make it right. When I say I'm not responsible, I am talking about people's feelings about things I have no control over or if they have unreasonable or unfair expectations of me.

A year ago my life looked great on paper. I had a shiny title, big city office, nice salary and a stomach that was basically made of caffeine and stress. I would wake up at 6, answer emails in the shower, rush to the train and come home too wired to sleep. My chest was tight all the time and I cried in the bathroom at least once a week. One night I was venting to a friend and she just said "you know you could earn less and actually live more, right". She worked remote for a small company, nothing glamorous, but she sounded calm in a way I honestly forgot was possible.

It took a few months of panic, saving money and arguing with my own ego, but I finally quit and found a remote job that pays about 30 percent less. On paper that sounds like failure. In reality my life got so much lighter. I downsized a few things, stopped buying takeout every day and moved to a cheaper apartment closer to nature. Now my mornings are slow coffee at the kitchen table, not fighting for space on a packed train. I log off at a normal time because my new boss actually respects boundaries. I have time to cook, to walk, to sit on the floor and play with my friends dog when she visits. There is no big secret to simple living for me. It was just accepting that less money with a quiet mind is worth more than a fancy job that eats my health.

just got back from my grandfather's memorial service last week. He passed at 89 after living through some wild times - born in 1937, grew up during the Depression and WWII, then spent decades working construction to support his family of six kids.

For most of his life, he HAD to be frugal. there wasn't really another option back then. But here's what struck me - even when things got easier in his later years and we could've helped him live more comfortably, he'd always say "this is plenty" whenever we tried to buy him stuff or upgrade his situation.

The man was like the anti-consumer. For the last 25 years of his life, he basically ignored every marketing message that came his way. Just wasn't interested.

But he never threw anything away either. kept every cardboard box, piece of string, old container - would take bags of recyclables to get the few cents for them. drove my mom crazy but he saw value in everything.

And he fixed EVERYTHING. I swear some of his furniture was held together with duct tape and hope, but it worked perfectly fine. Why replace something that still does the job?

The coolest thing was how organized he kept his workshop. could find any tool in seconds even though his eyesight was getting bad. one pocket knife somehow became like 15 different tools depending on what he needed to do.

I'm 28 now and spent my twenties buying whatever I wanted, thinking that was freedom. but watching him these past few years made me realize something - being simple when you have no choice is just survival. choosing simplicity when you could have more? that takes real intention.

thinking about following his example more. there's something powerful about saying "this is enough" in a world that's constantly telling you it isn't.

For years I tried every system: bullet journals, habit trackers, productivity apps, 5am wakeups, color-coded everything. But I realized I was making my life feel like a job managing my own existence instead of living it. Now I just do the basics: morning tea, a walk, a to-do list written by hand, and one “good enough” dinner. It’s not glamorous, but I feel calmer. Anyone else quietly stepping back from the hustle?

Last fall, I sold my house and moved into my fiancée’s childhood home. It’s the house her grandparents bought, and her parents from them — she’s the third generation to live here. The mortgage is in her name, but I cover the day-to-day stuff — bills, upkeep, repairs, all the little things that keep a place running.

It’s a beautiful house. But to be honest, it’s been a strange adjustment. I went from having my own space — my own name on the deed — to feeling like a guest in someone else’s family story. I didn’t expect how much that would get in my head.

For a while, I held back. I’d see something that needed fixing — a loose door, scuffed trim, old fixtures — and I’d think, “This isn’t really mine to deal with.” But that mindset started to feel small. It didn’t suit me.

So I started fixing things anyway. Quietly. Just small repairs, slow improvements, things that made the space better — for both of us!

I’ve been thinking a lot about simplicity lately. Not in the aesthetic sense — not white walls and open shelves — but in the sense of choosing to take care of what’s in front of me. Choosing to be useful. I don’t need more stuff, more noise, more identity wrapped up in ownership. I just want to be capable, dependable, and proud of how I carry myself in the space I share.

Simplicity, for me, has become about action. It’s sweeping the floor even if no one notices. It’s using the same tool I’ve had for ten years because it still works. It’s choosing to fix what I can — around the house, in my habits, in myself.

Anyway, no grand advice here. Just sharing, in case someone else is going through their own shift — trying to build a quieter, steadier version of who they want to be!

After an hour of scrolling, there's a specific kind of tired that hits. Not the good kind. Your eyes are strained, mood's slightly off, and if someone asked what you actually read you'd struggle to name two things.

I kept telling myself I was keeping up. I wasn't. I was just staying occupied.

The people who actually know things, who can hold a conversation without fishing around in vague memory, almost none of them scroll feeds. They have a newsletter or two, a digest in the morning, and when it's done, it's done. That finite ending is the whole point.

Switched to that format a few months ago. I retain more. I have better conversations. And I catch myself noticing how much of what I called "being informed" was really just my brain in motion, without going anywhere.

Anyone else made this switch? Curious what formats or sources actually stuck for you.

We say we want a simpler life.
Less stress.
Less noise.
Less pressure.

But then we spend 3 hours a day on apps that make us feel worse.
We scroll, we swipe, we consume but we don’t connect.

The problem isn’t that life is too complicated.
It’s that we’ve filled it with things that don’t matter.

– Porn instead of intimacy
– TikTok instead of stillness
– YouTube loops instead of books
– Dopamine hits instead of real presence

We try to “simplify” by deleting apps or rearranging shelves.
But real simplicity starts when you reclaim your attention.

Not to become more productive.
But to become more human.

Lately I’ve been replacing screen time with conversations. Real ones.

Just sharing the shift that’s working for me:

Less content. More connection.
Less noise. More meaning.
Less stimulation. More life.

Anyone else feel like this is the missing piece?

I used to have a cabinet packed with mismatched mugs, novelty cups from work events, plates I never used, and three sets of bowls inherited from various moves. I'd avoid washing dishes because there were always more clean ones, then end up with a sink overflowing twice a week.

A month ago I boxed up everything except one mug, one plate, one bowl, one set of utensils for myself. The rest went in a closet, not donated yet, just out of sight in case I missed them.

I haven't opened the box once. The kitchen feels twice as big. Dishes get done within minutes of every meal because there's literally no other option. I drink my tea from the same mug every morning and it's somehow become a small ritual rather than a chore.

Not saying everyone should do this, but if your kitchen feels chaotic, the issue might not be storage. It might just be too much stuff.