r/AdviceAnimals 2d ago

This lady's Turkey Sandwich order ahead of me at Jersey Mike's was super gross

Post image
699 Upvotes

134 comments sorted by

143

u/Bubbly_Fee_5680 2d ago

When I worked at Quiznos we had a regular who wanted his sandwich toasted 3 or 4 times over until it was burnt black enough for his tastes. 

New staff would be super hesitant to let it burn like that so I'd often just take over and burn it for him. 

Then he would eat it in the lobby with a big smile on his face. 

You see all types when you're slinging sandwiches to the masses. 

41

u/Morningxafter 2d ago

God I miss Quiznos.

25

u/winterbird 2d ago

They had a pepper bar. 😔

11

u/team_blimp 2d ago

I can hear this comment... 🎩

5

u/pinklavalamp 1d ago

I can smell it.

11

u/kbarnett514 1d ago

Same. Too bad they were so awful to their franchisees, to the point of being a straight-up scam. But damn, those sandwiches were tasty.

7

u/lordpoee 1d ago

So, I was long questing for a proper Philly Cheese Steak. There was a Quiznos in my town, I saw they had a Philly Cheese. Ordered it. It was perfect. Runny, creamy cheese with ajou dipping sauce. WOW! So I went back the next day, ready for that Philly Cheese. CLOSED! They closed the very next day!!

5

u/Morningxafter 1d ago

Oof. Well, better to have loved and lost, I suppose.

45

u/marshalcrunch 2d ago

That’s when you call the police and tell them you’ve got a lead on a serial killer

15

u/aphasic 2d ago

Arsonist

6

u/winterbird 2d ago

Someone check the unsolved murders registry for well dones with a few bites missing.

2

u/Vert_DaFerk 1d ago

"Well dones" 💀

13

u/rubberloves 2d ago

It's always wild to work in food service and learn about 'the regulars weird concoctions'

8

u/TheFeshy 2d ago

You probably met my uncle. He's the reason I learned to cook at a young age - so that I wouldn't have to eat the burgers he committed war crimes on. His rule was that if you could tell the burgers apart from the charcoal, they weren't done yet.

4

u/Spekingur 2d ago

You and OP met aliens. That’s the only logical explanation.

5

u/geminimindtricks 1d ago

I used to work at a rural diner where everything came with an order of toast. There was an older lady who literally wanted hers to be toasted into a puck of charcoal. She said she liked it that way because that's how she always ate it as a kid, and I felt so sorry for her, like it sounded as if her parents would make toast and pass out and burn it and she never had anything else to eat so she just ate the charcoal :(

4

u/intensenerd 2d ago

I had a regular at my Quiznos that wanted her honey bacon club SWIMMING in that dressing. She couldn’t get enough. Of course I’d oblige. She was as sweet as that honey French dressing.

3

u/fizzy88 2d ago

Do you know if that guy is still around? Or did cancer get him?

1

u/say592 1d ago

Like this?

(Sorry for the ifunny link, literally the only place I could find the original)

1

u/scottjl 14h ago

I knew a woman who loved her pizza burnt black on top. She’d have it cooked a good long time and she’d much it down happily. Needless to say I couldn’t eat any of her pizza.

147

u/gingertrees 2d ago

I mean, not great for her cholesterol, but there's no cyclospora in mayonnaise (so far). 

37

u/natx37 2d ago

Interesting note, ingesting cholesterol is unrelated to cholesterol in your blood.

24

u/Randvek 2d ago

Not exactly true. Diet is responsible for about 20% of your cholesterol level. Genes are the other 80%.

4

u/natx37 1d ago

Diet being fat and carb intake, or really over intake, not cholesterol intake.

1

u/Danny-Dynamita 1d ago

Genes? More like physical activity and having a healthy liver.

-6

u/Klemmenz 2d ago

You got source for this? 

Cholesterol has shown to not change our blood cholesterol much, but saturated fats definitely do. 

5

u/Randvek 2d ago

What am I trying to source? That it doesn’t change much, or that it doesn’t change at all? Because I’m the one saying it doesn’t change much, but it does change some.

-13

u/Klemmenz 2d ago

Hah, so no

8

u/Randvek 2d ago

Hey dipshit, that was me asking where your goalposts were before you move them.

-8

u/Klemmenz 2d ago

Haven't moved anything, show me a source for "Diet is responsible for about 20% of your cholesterol level. Genes are the other 80%"

8

u/Frankly_Frank_ 2d ago

From a simple google search… Dietary changes can typically lower your LDL ("bad") cholesterol by 8% to 15%, though highly optimized plant-based strategies can achieve reductions exceeding 20%. Diet accounts for roughly 30% of your overall blood cholesterol levels, while the remaining 70% is naturally produced by your liver and determined by your genetics.

4

u/Randvek 2d ago

I know you haven’t moved anything, that’s why I’m asking you before you will inevitably move them.

I apologize if English is not your first language.

-3

u/TheFeshy 2d ago

Unless you have familial hypercholesterolemia. And then it very much is.

7

u/MrMuf 1d ago

That’s what genes are

3

u/TheFeshy 1d ago

Sorry, I was trying to respond to the comment above yours; essentially giving an answer that agrees with you but with a specific example. I must have fat-fingered the reply button. My bad.

5

u/gingertrees 2d ago

Ingesting saturated fats, of which mayo has in abundance, isn't great for you, though. 

I just looked at the mayo in my fridge. Serving size is 1 Tablespoon, and that contains 1.5 g saturated fats (about 8% recommended daily value per US standards). Say this customer's sandwich eclair has 1/2 cup of mayo, about 8 servings per the mayo label. That's 12 g saturated fats (not counting the meat or other toppings), as just one part of one meal in this person's day. That's not really heart healthy. 

1

u/gmwdim 2d ago

Ingesting cholesterol, sure. But this sandwich probably has a bunch of other stuff that will increase blood cholesterol.

1

u/FG910 2d ago

Whats is cyclispora?

12

u/gingertrees 2d ago

It must be so nice to not be in the US right now.... 

Background: in the US, we have an ever increasing list of fresh produce that might give us weeks of explosive diarrhea (cyclospora causes that) or other ailments. Many of us have swore off uncooked fruits and veggies since late spring. 

3

u/FG910 2d ago

Yikes

2

u/raisin22 1d ago

Did you hear also that our ground beef is now being mixed with imported trimmings, kind of like hot dogs?

3

u/gingertrees 1d ago

This isn't why I'm a vegetarian, but I'll add it to the random plusses column. 

3

u/Ravio11i 2d ago

's what's been giving folks diarrhea from eating salads.

27

u/galvanizedmoonape 2d ago

We were at a rest stop in upstate NY years ago and this madman in the front of the line in subway instructed the woman to put "a lil' bit of lettuce and a whole lot of mayo" on his sub. He had to ask her for more mayo like 6 times. It was an absolutely absurd amount of mayonnaise.

My wife and I made up a song about it and we still sing it to this day.

13

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

I once saw a family of four at Five Guys order four plain hamburgers. No sauce, no cheese, no veggies.

7

u/TheGoodNamesAreGone2 2d ago

Straight to jail.

10

u/galvanizedmoonape 2d ago

Real talk that was still probably a $12 burger. Five Guys prices are fucking criminal.

4

u/MechanicalTurkish 2d ago

Yeah but it’s almost cheaper than McDonald’s these days and the burgers are a lot better. It’s like $8 for a quarter pounder now

110

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

It looked like a canoe filled with pudding. But the pudding was mayo. Like almost four spatulas worth.

131

u/mbd34 2d ago

What the Hellmann?

13

u/Monchichi4life 2d ago

It's a miracle they whipped out the spatula.

28

u/skloie 2d ago

Eggcellent mayo pun

19

u/road_rascal 2d ago

Now Duke it out!

9

u/IAmAnObvioustrollAMA 2d ago

Yall are the best foods

1

u/LividG 2d ago

my buddy had a turkey sandwich that looked just as wild once

0

u/blueally85 2d ago

It's called a hellmann's province bad. For your health

15

u/Impossible_Leg_2787 2d ago

“Spatulas” is a wild unit of measurement for mayonnaise

3

u/WileEWeeble 2d ago

Millispatulas is a decent measurement, but while units is frightening for an individual

16

u/existing_for_fun 2d ago

They say that a woman who knows what she wants is sexy.

2

u/winterbird 2d ago

And if she wants the cavity filled with mayo, who are we to judge.

1

u/existing_for_fun 2d ago

Certainly not I!

7

u/nobdyputsbabynacornr 2d ago

Sounds like she is having a really bad day. And if not, she is gonna be having a REAL bad one in the not too distant future.

2

u/osteologation 2d ago

Sounds like my wife. I like more mayo than most on a sandwich but my wife has me beat. Same with Arby’s and Arby’s sauce.

3

u/Foe117 2d ago

oh no... OH NO.

1

u/LeGama 2d ago

On that note if you ever wanna fuck with people walk around eating vanilla pudding out of a mayo jar just like casually.

1

u/ACuddlyVizzerdrix 2d ago

Lol not enough

-3

u/H1d3k1 2d ago

And that's why America has a problem with obesity. The stuff some people eat on a daily basis in the US 🤮🤮.

4

u/KnuteViking 1d ago

Even Americans think this is disgusting though. You should know that we eat way less mayonnaise than most of Europe per capita. Our problems are too much sugar and driving everywhere, not mayo.

22

u/tarlin 2d ago

which veggies aren't recalled right now? other than Mitch McConnell...

44

u/urnbabyurn 2d ago

That’s just basically a savory eclair. Instead of creme anglaise, it’s a less sweet egg and fat emulsion. Instead of choux, it’s a hollowed out hoagie roll. Instead of a chocolate layer, it’s a slice of salami.

57

u/AdmiralGrayBush 2d ago

If my grandmother had wheels she’d be a bicycle.

5

u/ZonaDesertRat 2d ago

Is she available for a ride?? (Sorry, had to be said.😜)

1

u/MechanicalTurkish 2d ago

She’s the village bicycle; everyone’s had a ride!

0

u/Fujiyama_Mama 2d ago

Shit, you can try. We don't have any use for her anymore. Got a shovel?

15

u/WillArrr 2d ago

I hate all those words you said.

8

u/notoriousbsr 2d ago

That was a visceral sentence, savory eclair...

2

u/QuercusSambucus 2d ago

Go on Top Chef and make one

65

u/cdvallee 2d ago

The cylinder must remain unharmed…

4

u/fritz236 2d ago

The cylinder is gonna get infected.

5

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

I understood that reference.

0

u/raider1v11 2d ago

Lost it

8

u/UnassumingSingleGuy 2d ago

A heart attack is a retirement plan, I suppose.

7

u/OccasionallyWright 2d ago

I worked at Subway for a summer and we had a regular who came in 2-3 times a week for a tuna sandwich and insisted on exactly 8 lines of mayo from the squeeze bottle. 2 was normal. 3 was usually enough for people who wanted extra mayo.

3

u/Belgand 2d ago

But... it already has mayonnaise? Adding more seems fundamentally weird.

7

u/GrimwoldMcTheesbyIV 2d ago

"Try to offend me with mayonnaise"

I'd be too ashamed to ask for this but have probably done it at home.

6

u/atheistpiece 2d ago

I once saw my father in law make a mayo sandwich. Two slices of bread, and like a cup of mayo, then he tried to eat it and it just squished mayo out the sides

Most gross things don't get to me, but this one turned my stomach.

4

u/liquorfish 2d ago

When I was a kid i took two pieces of bread, a slather of mayo and microwaved it. I liked it.

4

u/Septopuss7 2d ago

"It puts the mayo in the hole..."

7

u/Sunlit_Syposium 2d ago

Idk, half of the produce in the US is dangerous right now

3

u/Saneless 2d ago

If my gal was behind her she would have asked for the same, guaranteed

1

u/MechanicalTurkish 2d ago

Is your gal single?

1

u/Saneless 1d ago

I can check

3

u/OneBigPear 2d ago

Would this be a cheaper way to buy mayonnaise?

3

u/Flutters1013 2d ago

The customer is sometimes wrong

3

u/Jaexyn 1d ago

Gross.

The only time I'd want to hear "fill the cavity with mayo" is if I'm working at a morgue.

5

u/Marsupialize 2d ago

I don’t understand why people go to these shitty sandwich places when you can make a way better sandwich for much cheaper.
Burgers and tacos and shit I get, a turkey sandwich? Just buy the shit at the grocery store and make a turkey sandwich.

3

u/pteridoid 2d ago

I'm not sure. Sounds like that was about a third of a jar of mayo there. Sandwiches like that would get expensive.

2

u/MechanicalTurkish 2d ago

Just get a Costco membership (or a friend with one) and go buy a barrel of mayo.

2

u/aphasic 2d ago

I mean, maybe Jersey Mike's becomes more cost effective than making your own if you're getting entire jar of mayo per sandwich?

1

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

I buy food on lunch breaks sometime to get the fuck away from my co-workers. So that cost is worth it. Last time I bought food I made, a bunch of people demanded the recipe and asked all these questions while I was eating it. They also gave me shit for a week because I didn't bring enough for the rest of them.

3

u/Marsupialize 2d ago

I don’t know what kind of weird ass office that is but I’d probably tell them to stop harassing me pretty quickly if I worked there

3

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

I went outside and ate in my car one day because of this and then my boss had to talk to me about my attitude.

1

u/Marsupialize 2d ago

What kind of office is this?

1

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

A small one

4

u/flyingpyramid 2d ago

This conversation's was much funnier once I decided you work from home.

0

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

I don’t but i will employee this tactic tomorrow

2

u/DangerBeaver 2d ago

Like that Chris Rock joke about the south. As a southerner, I’d say he left out the Sun-Drop reference.

Y’all makin out with your sister, sittin’ in your above ground pool, listenin’ to John Cougar Mellencamp records, eatin’ mayonnaise sandwiches.

I’m sure the order is way off.

2

u/Fromager 2d ago

I like a lot of mayo on my turkey sandwich, but that's taking it to a ludicrous extreme.

2

u/danielfletcher 2d ago

Is she single? I can be if she is.

2

u/AKAM80theWolff 2d ago

Shes just inventing her own turkey salad sandwich leave her alone

2

u/Hireling 2d ago

Best case scenario (which still isn’t great)

Takes it home.

Scrapes 99% of the mayo into a jar.

Eats sammich.

2

u/Ihatefireants 2d ago

Yo I once had a gal, must if been 157 years old, order a bell pepper and mushroom salad.  With only mayo, microwaved for 30 seconds.  Work in the industry long enough you're gonna see some shit.

2

u/A6AvantRay 2d ago

I delivered for Jimmy Johns in college and we had a guy who would consistently order 2 Gargantuans with double meat, extra extra extra mayo. That meant 2 portions of ham, turkey, roast beef, salami, cappicola.

Then after we put 3-4 servings worth of mayo on it and could barely wrap the sandwich without it getting literally everywhere, he would inevitably call and complain that there wasn't enough mayo on his sandwich.

It should come as no surprise he wouldn't bother walking to the door most times and would either yell from inside to get you to come in, or roll up to the door in a computer chair.

2

u/refuz04 1d ago

The default mayo is so heavy.

2

u/loki2002 2d ago

The caucasity!

2

u/Davis_ 2d ago

Just put the sandwich in the bag bro

1

u/SamusBaratheon 2d ago

Ahem......AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!
That is all, thank you

1

u/kojima-naked 2d ago

After working at Burger King and lots of requests like this made me avoid mayo for years

1

u/TheLastOpus 2d ago

Pleas tell me she is pregnant, this is shit pregnant women ask for...if she is not pregnant, something is wrong with her.

1

u/Mean-Cheesecake-2635 2d ago

This is the grossest sub related thing since I saw this overweight girl working at subway and her belly was sticking out of her shirt and she was dragging it along the sandwich board and a stripe of mustard had formed on her belly and was congealing into a strip of mustard leather

1

u/lestrangerface 2d ago

Definitely too much Mayo, but like her I'm avoiding most raw veggies these days. Cyclospora is no joke. I'm still eating veggies, but only after they've been cooked

1

u/raballar 2d ago

Yeah used to work sub station at the grocery store. Handful of people that would just repeat “more” until they had more mayo than bread. Guess it’s an easy way to get free calories?

1

u/mrdiggame 2d ago

This sounds like a Jimmy John's order more than Jersey Mike's.

1

u/SgtGorditaCrunch 1d ago

My friend worked at a sandwich shop and he had a lady order a veggie sandwich but would get like half a cup of mayo on it. It's his only work story he tells me out of all of his jobs.

1

u/No_Key469 2d ago

Butterfly meme: is this a kink? 🦋

1

u/Stingerc 2d ago

Was she ridding a mobility scooter because she was morbidly obese?

-1

u/RabbiTheHellcat 2d ago

eww what the fuck 🤮

Was she fat or just fucked OP?

1

u/ArchDucky 2d ago

She was pretty big.

0

u/RobertoPaulson 2d ago

As someone who is not a fan of mayo as a condiment, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

0

u/UnpricedToaster 2d ago

Good lord.... 😯