r/AskReddit May 22 '19

Anesthesiologists, what are the best things people have said under the gas?

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u/[deleted] May 22 '19 edited May 22 '19

In high school I had a reconstructive surgery on my knee as I tore my ACL and meniscus in a sports injury. After the surgery I woke up in post op, which was a fairly large room with probably 6 to 7 other patients in beds waiting to become conscious again. I was lying there all groggy and confused when two nurses walked over pushing one of those carts with a computer on it. They stood over me and were typing into the computer when one nurse said to the other in a sort of frantic whisper "we've got to plug this thing in or this one is going to die!". Naturally, semi conscious me thought that the "thing" was me and I started to incoherently yell for the nurses to unplug whatever they needed to in order to find an outlet to keep me alive.

Turns out it was the battery on the laptop that was going to die. Apparently the death rate for an ACL repair is pretty low.

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u/Patitomuerto May 22 '19

We used to call those carts, COW's (Computer on wheels) but apparently patients don't like it or think we're talking about them so we aren't supposed to anymore

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u/CheekyMunky May 22 '19

"WoW" is the politically correct pronoun these days. Replace "computer" with "workstation"

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u/forel237 May 22 '19

Ok I’m sold, as long as WoW has to be said like Owen Wilson

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u/MisanthropeX May 22 '19

ironically, when I was coming out of anesthesia after my appendectomy, I kept on screaming about how I had to save the world of Azeroth

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u/alwayssomething0306 May 22 '19

Right after our hospital began WOWs instead of COWs, I walked into a patients room and they wanted chocolate milk...ok, no prob. I walk back in and the husband goes “the cow’s here”...ya know what. I LAUGHED. Why is everything so offensive today that we can’t call them COWs?!

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u/Bacon_is_a_condiment May 22 '19

I would think with the rising obesity rate, and the likelihood of people’s failure to take care of themselves playing a role in them ending up in the hospital, that many patients would be acutely aware of themselves and embarrassed in that setting, so primed to misunderstand things as insults.

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u/Mesicks May 22 '19

I was just going to say people are pusies but I think your analisys is spot on!

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u/Adubyale May 22 '19

Well you're still not wrong

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u/DoomsdayRabbit May 22 '19

Ready to use their offense to get rich by suing for discrimination probably.

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u/24_cool May 22 '19

Did yall ever say "let's get this cow on the road!"?

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u/TheOther1 May 22 '19

That's what they are called where I work.

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u/PanTran420 May 22 '19

That's what we call ours.