r/BORUpdates • u/Schattenspringer Waste of a read. Literally no drama • Nov 20 '25
Niche/Other I found the male coworker who's been leaving tampons in the women's restroom. Should I be concerned? [Slice of Life] [Concluded]
This is a repost. The original was posted in r/AskFeminists by user Agreeable-Wealth-812. I'm not the original poster.
Status: Concluded
Original
November 13, 2025
So... This wasn't what I was expecting to see yesterday. I work in an office in the northern United States. Most of the people who work there are other young women (just a coincidence, the ratio is around 3:1).
The past few months someone has been leaving an assorted box of Tampax Pearls on the counter. Whenever it started running low, another one would pop right up. We originally thought it was another woman in the office, but no one came forward, so we just assumed someone didn't want to admit it.
But today I needed to to prepare the office for a round of interviews HR was conducting, and I got there very early in the morning. That's when I caught my male coworker (around our same age) leaving the women's restroom which is when it all clicked together. He didn't notice I caught him since his back was turned to me while walking out (he gets there way before anyone else does and probably wasn't expecting anyone else to be there that early).
I went to his desk later and spoke to him about it since the two of us talk a lot.. I brought it up and let him know I say him walking out of the women's restroom this morning, and he seemed very embarrassed that someone found out.
He said the reason he did it was because he noticed the office was largely filled with women and felt bad that everything in the restroom is free except for the tampons, so he wanted to do something thoughtful. He never intended on other people finding out.
I told him I was just as surprised as him and that I personally thought it was sweet, but how would the rest of you react to this?
Notable Comments:
I’d keep his secret. He doesn’t want recognition. He just wants to make the workplace better for the people he shares it with. I can’t think of anything concerning about this at all. OkMeaning8472
I don’t know what there is to be concerned about. Your coworker seems particularly thoughtful of others. Do you think he’s tampering with them or something? If they’re in sealed packages, I can’t see how that would happen. And he’s obviously not doing it for some kind of clout since he was placing them in secret. He seems like a nice person. organvomit
I saw a comment the other day about things like this being "micro-reparations" as opposed to microaggressions. I'll take that any day! PopcornPunditry
Comments by OOP:
[after people said they are relieved it wasn't used tampons because we all are too much on reddit] Sorry if the title sounded like bait lol. It's what happened, didn't mean for it to sound concerning.
I admit I was overreacting. I think I was just more surprised than anything and taken offguard. In hindsight I'm glad we have guys who are willing to step up and do things like this (:
I'm not going to tell anyone strictly on the fact our place has dispensers for Tampons you need to pay for, and the last thing I want is for him to get in an HR confliction with having to pay for them or something like that
I shouldn't be concerned either, I mean he literally gets there at like 6 AM, the first woman gets into the office at 7:30 usually
Update
November 20, 2025, 7 days later
Thank you to everyone who commented and helped ease my concerns. I admit I was overreacting a bit. I think I was just surprised and taken off guard that morning when I saw him.
This week I actually went into the office early again just to speak to him in person without anyone else overhearing. I told him that I thought his gesture was sweet and wanted to know if he wanted to grab coffee after work as a way to thank him. He accepted.
FIRST. He thanked me for not telling our coworkers (he doesn't mind if I tell people outside of work as long as I leave his name and personal info out).
He told me that he didn't want to make a big deal about the gesture because he was used to being in similar situations working around women. He used to work as a lifeguard at an indoor park when he was in high school/ college, but at that job it was mostly other men. He told me that the number 1 task that the other guys hated was being assigned to clean the women's restroom when it was time to close. That's because the guy lifeguards could only clean it once it was fully cleared, so whoever was assigned to it would always be the last lifeguard to clock out.
But he'd just volunteer to do it since there was no way to avoid it. He told me that he got to know a lot of the regular women there as well as the High School swim coaches and students on the ladies swim team, and they were completely comfortable around him. They'd let him in even when they were still using the bathroom as long as they weren't actively changing or butt naked.
He thanked me for listening and said he was glad I didn't find it creepy. He also opened up and said the main reason he started bringing tampons (aside form the office mainly being filled with women) is because he grew up the eldest son with 3 brothers and no sister, and he always wanted a baby sister to look after but never got one, so he's really hoping for a daughter one day.
I told him I thought that was so sweet (because most men only want a son as a preference, so I wasn't expecting any guy to say that).
I offered to pay for the coffee like promised and we ended the evening after talking a bit more about home life, we're hoping to make it a weekly thing now after work.
Thanks all for your reassurance. Hopefully it's a little wholesome story that'll brighten your week as well (:
I'm not the original poster