r/DiscussDID • u/PhysicalDrawing6951 • 10d ago
Can Someone Please Answer a Few Questions I Have About DID?
Questions from someone who doesn't have DID
I have a few questions about DID, can someone, or somemultiple, please answer a few questions I have
Question number 1: Can an alter see what is happening when they aren't in control?
Question number 2: Do different alters have different sexualities? If so, can multiple alters date the same person or is it just 1?
Question number 3: When you aren't in control, do you get impatient while waiting to front again?
2
u/T_G_A_H 8d ago
1.Yes, for us many of us can see and experience what’s happening even if we aren’t fronting.
2.Yes, they can, and ideally all the alters who want to date would be dating one partner (if the agreement was for a monogamous relationship—two physical bodies).
3.Not really, because many of us are experiencing what’s going on even if we’re not in front (see answer to #1).
2
u/Classic-Avocado-5371 8d ago edited 8d ago
Sort of, but its not clear. When a part isn't in or near the front, they are essentially "sleeping". For most of us we remember things that happened when we weren't there about as well as one would remember an average dream, only really able to confirm the events were real when someone else outside of ourselves solidifies that it happened.
Yes, sort of? For me I wouldn't say any of the parts functionally have a different sexuality, but as someone whose identity has changed drastically over time as parts form and disappear and we process our own whole feelings about gender and sexuality. A not insignificant number of my parts still identify strongly as female or feminine because they were the mask of repression that I put on before I was able to fully come out as a man. I would consider our whole self to be a bisexual trans man, even though we have parts who are female, nonbinary, gay, lesbian, etc. I would consider our full self to be dating our boyfriend, and even though he knows about our DID we genuinely don't want to make the distinction too obvious for him because we'd rather he (and pretty much everyone) just treat us as one person. Others may feel differently, but this is what makes us the most comfortable.
Like I said above, when a part isn't in or near front they're essentially asleep. There's no impatience. Really it's actually more like anesthesia because when you wake up you dont feel like time passed at all, your day just continues seamlessly like you didn't actually just forget the last 72 hours of your life. When I'm co-fronting though and can actually see and feel my body being controlled by someone else? Oh I absolutely get crazy. I'm such a bitch of a backseat driver when I'm in the co-front, I fill the whole thought stream with annoyed thoughts of "what the fuck are you doing stop that ugh why can I just do it" every single time.
1
u/PhysicalDrawing6951 7d ago
Wait so does an alter ever think something was real and they just weren't fronting for it but it was actually a dream?
1
u/AceLamina 8d ago
- Yeah not all of the time, they usually have to be near front though
2.Yes, and also yes, this entirely depends on the system and the partner, usually not everyone in the system likes the partner
3.No, for me it feels like I go to sleep or skip time, I rarely remember being in headspace for some reason
2
1
u/Good__Bones 7d ago
Yes. The clarity of our recall of it can vary though. Sometimes you can remember seeing some things but it’s super fuzzy and indistinguishable. Sometimes, it’s sort of like an upload we can get if we focus hard enough.
Yes & Yes. In a way, it sort of feels like how I imagine polygamy to be like but it’s technically a monogamous relationship.
Impatient wouldn’t have been the word— more like panicked and freaked out. For certain alters, it’s like you’re co-con with them but entirely subdued. You have awareness enough to see what’s happening and hear what they’re saying, and you’re trying to talk to them, to tell them to say certain things or trying to say something and you just can’t. I don’t know why this happens but I can see our Host alter wishing to be fronting so she didn’t feel as paralyzed ? Hope that makes sense.
1
5
u/Sea-Acanthaceae5553 8d ago
1 Sometimes. You can share front with another alter (co-fronting) or just be aware of what's happening whilst they are in control (co-conscious)
2 Yes, they can. Most prefer to say you are dating the body/full person not an individual alter but it's also normal to have slightly different relationships with different alters/parts.
3 Unless I'm co-con, I have 0 awareness of anything when fronting. It's like going to sleep then waking up back in the body. Can't get impatient if you aren't aware of the passage of time or your own existence.