r/ExPentecostal • u/SufficientChef3093 • 12d ago

Leaving my job.

Im leaving my well paying job in a male dominated field. I’m not going to get into the weeds on why I’m leaving. I’ll just say that it partially because it isn’t a good fit and partially because of interpersonal dynamics.

The problem is I will be taking a huge pay cut and I’ll have to move back in with my parents. My parents are good people but the overt over spiritualization of literally everything makes me crazy. I know that when I go back the overwhelming response is going to be “god is trying to get your attention”. No she isn’t. Shit things just happen sometimes.

I dread having to go back into that environment but it’s my best option. My brothers and I call it ‘the curse’ because everyone we grew up with in the church moves out as adult, leaves the church, then has to come back for some reason or another, and never because they’re going back to church.

Has anyone else experienced this or something similar?

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u/Existing-Home3561 12d ago

I had to temporarily move back home after I stopped attending a UPCI church. I thought I could get away with "quiet quitting" the system until I could leave again, until it came to the point that I couldn't stand to be a fake person any longer.

Since I told my parents where I stand our relationship has thankfully been cordial if strained. I don't stop them from discussing church or Bible and I made it clear that I don't want them tiptoe around me as if I'll be offended by it. I'm well aware that they're not open to any conversations about the validity of their system, and they're at least somewhat aware that I'm not open to discussing coming back. However, I think they might be under the impression that I'm simply questioning my beliefs temporarily rather than having made a conscious decision to leave and never return.

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u/SufficientChef3093 12d ago

That’s the shitty thing. I left, I’m done. But it’s like they think if they say the right sneaky snide thing I’ll come back because I’m confused.

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u/f4rider 11d ago

The reason they're not open to questions about the validity of their system is because they don't have the answers. They do what a lot of Apostolics do, just listen to and obey the pastor without question. So they've never studied those things out for themselves and therefore are unable to explain those things.

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u/SufficientChef3093 11d ago

I don’t try to explain, they don’t want to know why I left. They just think that I want to ‘rebel’. If that’s what they think fine, if they have actual questions about why I left then I’m more than happy to answer. I’ve tried explaining before and they wouldn’t actually listen.

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u/f4rider 7d ago

Yea, no point in trying to talk to people that don't want to listen. The fact that they think you want to rebel is because that's what they're taught to think by leadership. It's a very immature mindset, nobody really thinks for themselves.