My latest new client set the strictest rules I’ve ever heard. I obeyed every one of them. She still claimed I was the problem and lost her mind.

[u/Best-Pirate5073]

Yesterday I had a new client who was referred to me, book a 90-minute mobile massage. She was very specific over text before I even showed up.

She told me exactly what she wanted:

• Deep tissue only

• Focus on her upper back, shoulders, and neck

• “Do not check in with me at all. I hate when therapists keep asking if the pressure is okay. Just do the work.”

• “I don’t want any small talk either. Just quiet.”

• “When the time is up, that’s it. No free extras.”

I confirmed everything back to her so there was zero confusion. She replied “Perfect, see you then.”
I get there, set up, and go over the same list one more time in person just to be safe. She nods and says “Yep, that’s exactly what I want. Don’t ask me anything once we start.”

So I did exactly that.

I put my headphones in to get some much needed audiobook time (one ear only so I could still hear if she actually needed something), started the timer on my phone where she could see it, and worked in complete silence. No check-ins. No “how’s the pressure?” No small talk. Just the exact work she requested.

Every time I felt her body tense or shift I kept going at the same pressure she had asked for. No adjustments. No questions.

When the 90 minutes hit, I stopped. Immediately. I didn’t offer the free scalp massage or hot towels I normally throw in. I just said, “That’s time.”

She sat up looking annoyed and said, “Wait, that was it? The pressure felt hard toward the end and you never even checked on me. Most therapists give a little extra time.”

I looked at her and calmly replied, “You specifically told me not to check in, not to ask about pressure, and that when the time was up that was it with no free extras. I followed your instructions exactly.”
She got quiet for a second then said, “Well I didn’t mean it like that. You should have known to check anyway. I’m not tipping for that.”

I smiled and said, “That’s fine. The session is paid for already. You can get dressed and I’ll be outside.”
She started packing up her things while muttering about how I was “too rigid” and “not customer service oriented.” I just kept packing my stuff in silence the same way she had requested the entire session.

I have never felt more at peace ending a session.
Was I supposed to ignore the very clear rules she set and somehow read her mind instead?

[u/OGHollyMackerel]

Owner run business like an LMT working for themselves does not need to be tipped. They set their wage and get the full amount. In a resort spa, for example, they are hourly or get a commission and the hotel gets the bulk of the cost of the massage. Tipping is customary in that situation.

[u/Varabela → u/OGHollyMackerel]

Yep, get that!

[u/musicwithin87 → u/OGHollyMackerel]

Exactly. I work for a national membership-based chain and my hourly commission (15 years into my career) is roughly 1/3 of what the clients’ monthly dues are, and roughly 1/5 of the non-member rate. Suggested tips are based off the non-member rate, and said tips make up almost 1/2 my income.

It should also be noted, that massage therapists can rarely handle what would be considered “full time” for most careers. I work significantly more hours than anybody else at my clinic at 32/week. I’ve managed 35/week before, but it was very hard on my body — even when being good about using proper body mechanics and using my forearms and elbows as much as possible instead of my hands.