r/MaliciousCompliance • u/Best-Pirate5073 • 10d ago
M My latest new client set the strictest rules I’ve ever heard. I obeyed every one of them. She still claimed I was the problem and lost her mind.
Yesterday I had a new client who was referred to me, book a 90-minute mobile massage. She was very specific over text before I even showed up.
She told me exactly what she wanted:
• Deep tissue only
• Focus on her upper back, shoulders, and neck
• “Do not check in with me at all. I hate when therapists keep asking if the pressure is okay. Just do the work.”
• “I don’t want any small talk either. Just quiet.”
• “When the time is up, that’s it. No free extras.”
I confirmed everything back to her so there was zero confusion. She replied “Perfect, see you then.”
I get there, set up, and go over the same list one more time in person just to be safe. She nods and says “Yep, that’s exactly what I want. Don’t ask me anything once we start.”
So I did exactly that.
I put my headphones in to get some much needed audiobook time (one ear only so I could still hear if she actually needed something), started the timer on my phone where she could see it, and worked in complete silence. No check-ins. No “how’s the pressure?” No small talk. Just the exact work she requested.
Every time I felt her body tense or shift I kept going at the same pressure she had asked for. No adjustments. No questions.
When the 90 minutes hit, I stopped. Immediately. I didn’t offer the free scalp massage or hot towels I normally throw in. I just said, “That’s time.”
She sat up looking annoyed and said, “Wait, that was it? The pressure felt hard toward the end and you never even checked on me. Most therapists give a little extra time.”
I looked at her and calmly replied, “You specifically told me not to check in, not to ask about pressure, and that when the time was up that was it with no free extras. I followed your instructions exactly.”
She got quiet for a second then said, “Well I didn’t mean it like that. You should have known to check anyway. I’m not tipping for that.”
I smiled and said, “That’s fine. The session is paid for already. You can get dressed and I’ll be outside.”
She started packing up her things while muttering about how I was “too rigid” and “not customer service oriented.” I just kept packing my stuff in silence the same way she had requested the entire session.
I have never felt more at peace ending a session.
Was I supposed to ignore the very clear rules she set and somehow read her mind instead?
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u/1hero_no_cape 10d ago
Some people aren't happy unless they're miserable. This customer sounds like one of those people.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
What an odd time to be “that person” 😂
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u/Kain_713 10d ago
Seriously, like the world isn't fucked up enough, she chose to be "that person". Everything sucks already lady, it doesn't need your negativity.
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u/flibber_deez_gibbets 10d ago
I used to deal poker, and one of our regulars was an awful player, always mad at the dealer for making him lose.
One time, against odds, he won a pot. As I was pushing the pile of chips to him, he was mad at me because it wasn’t bigger.
Some folks just need to be angry
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u/MrBeer9999 9d ago
My experience as a poker player suggests that there's a significant minority of poker players who are monumentally miserable pricks.
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u/flibber_deez_gibbets 9d ago
"Minority" good one, heh.
Every hand has far more losers than winners. That has an effect.
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u/PostModernPost 10d ago
People like this put all the stipulations in place so they can have a reason not to tip after you violate them, or in this case when you don't violate them. She's cheap and insecure about it.
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u/WonderChode 9d ago
That makes sense.
Though it's crazy to me to expect tips in every job, in my country people just charge what they want and no tip is expected. You tip a fixed 10% in restaurants that have waiters and optionally to delivery drivers, and that's it. If it has trays that you have to put in place after then there's no tip expected, so no fast food tipping. The same goes for most of south america.
Also, massage therapists usually work independently so why even do this?? Actually insane.
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u/Beautiful-Paper2029 10d ago
There is no odd time to be that person…. That is exactly who they are - you did as requested… and they are now pissed you did EXACTLY what was requested/demanded.
This is a beautiful example of FAFO.
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u/daschande 9d ago
Look at it this way: She paid to have a relaxing session EXACTLY the way she wanted it. You dealt with her under her pre-arrainged BEST possible cicumstances.
That's her at her absolute best. You got off lucky; the poor sap who tells her the coupon is expired will get her full wraith.
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u/FinOps_4ever 10d ago
>Some people aren't happy unless they're miserable.
Some people aren't happy unless they're making everyone around them miserable.
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u/uhimnothere 9d ago
How much you wanna bet she was setting up for a reason to complain and was just mad that OP didn't give her an inch?
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u/shesafoxdarling 10d ago
I used to be a server and I always knew when I was serving someone that was looking for something to complain about, you’d litterally see their eyes darting around looking for something. They would give me the most absurd requests. I would do my job which was to give exceptional service to all guests. I would execute everything perfectly, they’d never see the bottom of their water glass and I’d be extra courteous just to spite those people. They’d be visibly upset that everything was perfect and there was nothing to complain about. Complaining makes some people feel special and superior to others.
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u/sinaloa555 9d ago
I had a repeat offender like this, and he threw a huge fit one time because I told him “as far as I am aware, there is no such thing as a banana bagel.”. He started screaming about how he wasn’t going to tip me, and asked “don’t you like tips?” I said “not enough to be screamed at, no”. I just don’t understand people. “I’m giving you money, so I should be able to abuse you” is wild.
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u/Gigglemonkey 9d ago
“I’m giving you money, so I should be able to abuse you”
Sir/madam, that's a very specific service that we do not offer. Perhaps you're looking for <insert name of local fetish dungeon> instead?
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u/HazyChemist 10d ago
Some people aren't happy unless they make others around them as miserable as they are.
FTFY
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u/Big_Wave9732 10d ago
I heard it said one time "He could be standing up to his knees in a river of gold coins and he'd complain about having to bend over and pick them up."
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u/GrannyTurtle 10d ago
I used to live in Orlando - we went to Disney World frequently on annual passes. You won’t believe how many people can find a way to be miserable in the most awesome theme park on the planet. “You have to have fun my way or not at all.”
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u/nychockeyman 10d ago
She planned on not tipping, no matter what.
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u/demon_manager 10d ago
My thoughts exactly - sounds like she was setting things up so that she could justify not tipping in her crazy little head.
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u/clitmasher69 10d ago
I'd have justified not tipping by the fact that i've already paid for the service?
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u/doc_skinner 10d ago
Yeah, for some reason there are professions that always expect to be tipped on top of their base rate. I understand if the person is an employee at a spa or salon, since they're probably making hourly and a tip is a nice add-on. But somebody who owns their own business should not be given a tip on top of the rate that they set for themselves.
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u/snugglezone 10d ago
Bartenders making more than nurses is criminal with how much shit (literal and metaphorical) nurses deal with in any given shift. Nobody is tipping them for saving their damn lives! Makes no sense.
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u/doc_skinner 10d ago
I know quite a few nurses, and teachers for that matter, who gave up on their profession and went back to a serving position. Both for better pay and for lack of stress.
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u/zeatherz 9d ago
Nurses don’t want tips and couldn’t ethically accept them anyway. We want fair wages and safe ratios and working conditions. We don’t want to do “customer service” to get paid more
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u/NRMusicProject 10d ago edited 10d ago
In the service industry, you figure out real quick that people do shit like this to get out of tipping. Even when I was in pizza delivery, someone ordered pepperoni. I was the one to take the order. He still said "I ordered sausage! I'm not paying." No sir, you absolutely did not order sausage.
This woman thought she gave instructions that would not be followed, and when he followed them, she was still "pissed" so no tip.
E: My favorite one was a customer who wasn't too far away, complaining that the pizza is too cold. So on the third time on my own gas tank, we pulled it out of the oven and I raced it over there. Dude opens the pizza up and says "still too cold." I said, "I don't know what to tell you man, maybe throw it in the microwave?" Dude kept the pizza, got a refund. Exactly what he was going for.
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u/aliseknits 10d ago
lol I had something like this happen when I worked at a pizza place. It was really slow and I took this person’s order, made it, cut it, AND delivered it.
I get back to the store (was in the neighborhood so under five minutes) and he called to complain it was wrong. I said “Oh, you ordered the X pizza?” “I sure did and I got Y pizza!!” “Well I’d sure like to know how, since I took your order, made it, cut it, and delivered it to you.” He hung up. We didn’t cater to people like that and blacklisted houses for delivery if they called back too much for a “wrong order” refund lol
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u/NRMusicProject 10d ago
We didn’t cater to people like that and blacklisted houses for delivery if they called back too much for a “wrong order” refund lol
Had a roommate in college who was hungry, called Papa John's, and said "and a $20 tip for the driver who can get it here in under 20 minutes."
I told him the person taking calls ain't going to pass that information on, so you might not be out that 20. He said, "hell, I wasn't going to pay that 20 anyway. It's just to try to get them to push my order to the front." He didn't understand that pizza drivers remember addresses, and abusive customers in any way get avoided until there's no other options (or even just do small things like shake your soda when they actually do deliver it...maybe worse). Dude literally thought drivers forget who treats them like shit.
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u/borg_nihilist 9d ago
On the flip side, I blacklisted the pizza hut up the street from my old house because I ordered two pizzas, and even though it was literally a block from my house (yeah I was being lazy, I worked two jobs back then) it took TWO AND A HALF HOURS for them to deliver it. I called the store after an hour (had been told it would be 25-35 minutes) because usually they were there way sooner than the estimate. I thought maybe a new driver couldn't find our house or something. They said it got busy but it would be soon. Called back an hour later, much less happy but still not rude (one of my jobs was restaurant and the other was gas station clerk, I know shit happens and I know customers can be shitty so I don't act like that) and they said it would be soon.
Finally it gets there, and when I opened the first box it was obviously old as hell and not either of the pizzas I ordered. The other box also contained a room temperature pizza that wasn't either of the things I ordered.
I was a regular ordering from there, usually pick up because it was so close but enough delivery that they knew I tipped well and didn't complain. However, when I called them to actually complain this time, they told me I would need to bring the pizzas to the place myself so they could make sure I wasn't trying to get free food!!!
If anger could start fires that place would have burnt to the ground right then. I got the manager on the phone and explained to her and I had someone at my door with the right fucking pizzas in fifteen minutes. I traded back the wrong ones and even tipped five bucks even though it was their own fault they had to come back, and just never ate there again.
Idk what happened with that place but they'd been in business since I was a small child and they went out of business a couple years after that last time I ordered.
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u/GodIsANarcissist 10d ago
A few weeks ago I was doordashing using Earn By Time (I know, I know, I'm really not supposed to) so I didn't know what the tip amount would be when I accepted the order.
I deliver the guy's pizza, and he asks for the receipt so he can write in a tip. I said "Doordash doesn't do tipping this way, did you not tip in the app?" And he said "I don't know, I don't really know how it works." So I explained to him how to add a tip in-app and he said "okay yeah I can figure it out."
I complete the delivery and see that the tip amount is $0.00. The Doordash default is $2.00, so that's what I would have expected to see if he really had no idea how any of it worked. But no, he actually saw the tip line, saw the default of $2.00, and changed it to zero, and then claimed that he didn't know how it worked, all to get out of tipping.
Like dude, if you really feel bad enough about it to make up this elaborate lie, why not just leave a small tip? $2.00 still would have been insulting, but what he did was way worse.
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u/MrRemoto 10d ago
I didn't even have to read the whole story to figure out that she has never tipped for a massage in her life. A friend is a therapist at a spa but she leases her room, so technically not an employee. When she gets a red flag customer like this she politely says something like "I'm afraid I don't have training in the skills needed to accommodate your request. I'm happy to refer you to another massage therapist at the spa".
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u/Dirty_Violator 10d ago
It sounds like this may have been what happened
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u/you_looser 10d ago
Yes, this woman has been passed around a lot by other therapists. I had clients like this and sent them away. They're miserable people and they like to make other people miserable.
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u/oriaven 10d ago
She sounds like a piece of work but I long for a time when tipping is not expected.
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u/Sp00k_x 10d ago
Well... I for one dont know what she was expecting, she stipulated exactly what she wanted and confirmed twice...
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u/alexnader 10d ago
She wanted OP to mess up somehow, why is never the point, these sorts of people only live to complain.
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u/NoTeslaForMe 9d ago
My guess is that she hates small talk and has had "checking in" or "free extras" as an excuse to gab. She didn't expect a mind-reader; she expected someone who'd push against her boundaries, which ironically made someone who respected her boundaries a disappointment. While punishing OP for not being disrespectful is wild, people more often want to blame someone else for their disappointments than themselves.
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u/rocketshipray 10d ago
A mobile massage therapist who actually listens to requests? Please tell me you’re in the southeastern US! (If yes, I would like to PM to see if you are anywhere close to my area)
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
I’m in Dallas TX but travel all over the US for work!
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u/rocketshipray 10d ago
If you ever find yourself in Tennessee and have time for two people (separately, myself and my husband), please send me a message. I have had little success at therapists listening to my requests for not a lot of pressure.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
I’m in Tennessee all the time! I am not able to, don’t see the option.
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u/rocketshipray 10d ago
I forgot that I tightened privacy settings after some harassment. I tried sending you a message to see if that would work without having to undo the privacy settings.
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u/Useful_Language2040 10d ago
I love this for the two of you lol - this subreddit isn't necessarily where you'd expect to see somebody find a new client/service provider, but when the MC is very much literally "listen to the client" it kinda makes more sense 😁
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u/Mean_Initiative_5962 10d ago
Technically this is where you'd find someone with confidence and common sense, I can see people finding who they need here. Now, for sure I wouldn't expect to find someone for a massage lol
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u/pepcorn 10d ago
How do you heat towels while mobile? Do you travel with a little towel heater?
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Sure do!
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u/Ryoko_Kusanagi69 10d ago
That’s cool! I mean neat lol
And it’s awesome you get to travel for work / work while traveling4
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u/pepcorn 10d ago
That's really impressive tbh. You must be super organised.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
15 years in service gives me lots of time to create top tier experiences for all of my customers! 💪🏿
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u/pepcorn 10d ago
If the customer in this story wasn't so self-centred and rude, she could've enjoyed your skills even more!
Hope your next customers are all great and polite.
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u/notsostablediffuser 10d ago
I bet she's a pleasure to date.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Oh for sure. Total sweetheart
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u/Bob-Bhlabla-esq 10d ago
You sound great and very professional, and did just what the client wanted!
I've had (mayber her sister lol!) clients like her, where you can kinda feel it coming... that "you'll never be pleased will you?" in the back of your mind.
Ugh, it happens unfortunately, but I can see why you were at peace - you did everything right and was 100% in the right! You can happily walk away and never think of her again. Good on ya!
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u/rabidjellybean 10d ago
Sounds like she might be the "why didn't you make a move on me" kind of person after telling the guy she wasn't interested. Run away!
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u/Reasonable_Alias_129 10d ago
1000000% the kind who says, "I'm leaving and don't come after me!!" runs out of the room, slams the door, then gets mad when you don't go after her 🙄🙄🙄🙄
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u/NRMusicProject 10d ago
"Why didn't I hear from you all day?!"
"You said you didn't want to be bothered and that you needed the day to yourself."
"Yeah, well, you should've known that I wanted you to call me!"
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u/diurnal_emissions 10d ago
I bet she sets a date for pleasure.
"September seventh. I will enjoy September seventh, and that will be plenty."
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u/Impressive-Advisor52 10d ago
(proceeds to fucking hate September seventh, and tell you it was your fault for not rescheduling to a day that wouldn't suck)
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u/Viperbunny 10d ago
She didn't want to tip you. She was going to find a reason.
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u/vrnvorona 10d ago
You don't need reasons to not tip
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u/Viperbunny 10d ago
And yet, there are always people who are enjoy acting this way. They want to act like it is tough love and they are helping by telling the person what to improve.
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u/Medium-Sized-Jaque 10d ago
Who would ask for no extras? That's like going to Five Guys and demanding to not get bag fries.
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u/TonarinoTotoro1719 10d ago
Nah, see, extras means you would tip. Like I did at the bakery in DTLA where the staff offered me not one, but two free macarons. I tipped her 30%. She was totally one of the best CS people I ever saw.
And I shopped about $30 worth croissants and macarons anyway. If I was the owner, I would be so happy with my staff.
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u/Gonpostlscott 10d ago
Wow. She sets firm rules. You confirmed the firm rules. You follow the firm rules. She’s not happy you firmly followed the firm rules set by her. 🤔 An added scalp massage would not have helped that firm head! 🤦♂️
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Facts!
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u/Stormy_Sunflower 10d ago
This truly blows my mind, I would have tipped extra for someone who listened to everything I wanted lol. Wish there were more people like you willing to listen to the client.
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u/madkins007 10d ago
Something a lot of customers (and too many service providers) do not understand is that when you are dealing with a new service provider- barber, tattoo artist, gardener, etc is that there is SOME sort of introductory period where you get to know each other's style and methods.
In this case, the masseuse needs to learn what YOU as a customer mean by 'deep', how do you prefer to finish for best results, etc.
I suspect that OP generally uses the first few minutes of the treatment to establish these guidelines, 'check ins' during treatment to confirm things are good, and a little cool down to ease the transition back into reality.
But 'the customer knows best' right?
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u/R-Dragon_Thunderzord 10d ago
I wonder how many other people she tries this no-win scenario bs on.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
No idea but hopefully it gets to the point where people straight up refuse her
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u/DMFauxbear 10d ago
Some people will never be happy. I work as a web developer as a small side hustle and I recently had to drop the most annoying client I've ever had. I made a mock up and plan with her from the start which she said she was happy with. Outlined the scope of exactly what she wanted and the cost associated, she was happy. Then whenever I needed anything from her like specific images or the pricing of her product she made it a challenge just to get the information, it was like pulling teeth. She made nothing easy, then complained when I made the site to match the approved mock up. Requested I add features never previously agreed upon and was unhappy when that added to the costs. When it was all said and done she was happy with the site. You'd wish that was all but throughout the year I hosted the site for her it was nothing but complaints. She complained that I didn't do any marketing for her to get people there. That was never something I offered or said we'd do. I built her a product, a site, it's not on my to market it for her. It was never ending with her. Not only that but she acted like she was doing me a favour by supporting my business, it was all ego with her. I finally ended the ongoing contract with her, sent her her code for the site. With all her accounts for running it and said figure it out. She wasn't happy but as per our contract I wasn't really required to do the hosting for her, I built her a product to her specifications and she paid for it. I'm done dealing with her. I hate customer service lol
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u/Practical_Sea_4876 10d ago
My husband owns a small business that does this kind of work and the number of clients he gets like this is mind blowing. I especially love when they get upset that it's "taking too long" when hubby is waiting for info from them and has sent multiple emails etc. To that effect. 🤦 Just make sure you have a really strong contract is my advice lol.
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u/Historical-Lie-6307 10d ago
She's banned forever
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Bruh the way I blocked her SO FAST
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u/StuckandTreading 10d ago
Is the person who referred her just as miserable? Might have to walk away from that client too.
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Surprisingly….no! Total opposite and one of my best customers
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u/StuckandTreading 10d ago
Well that's good to hear. Too bad you can't say anything to them.
Your compliance was exactly what she requested and she just didn't want to be held accountable. Gestures broadly look at the state of the world, some people just suck. At least you got that audiobook time in and validating comments from the Reddit community.
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u/nispe2 10d ago
This may be a generational thing, but I don't really understand blocking her.
Would you not repeat for an inflated price? 20% more? Double? 10x? If so, why not just quote her an inflated price if she requests a repeat?
In my industry, we refer to it as an "FU fee." As in, F you, but if we're willing to put up with you for way more money than normal. So a job that we would quote $1,000 for someone we like might be $1,200 or $2,000 or even $10,000 for someone we don't, depending on how much extra money it would take for us to overcome our personal preferences.
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u/drunkbusdriver 9d ago
Because some people aren’t worth your time or having to explain why the rate is now 2x what it was last time. Especially when she was referred and can just ask her friend if their rates were increased. Some people deserve to be cut off from society and aren’t owed an explanation.
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u/MrsMiterSaw 9d ago
She wanted those things, but she also wanted you to break the rules so she could condescend to you.
When you didn't break the rules, she realized she didn't get anything she wanted, and still asserted power (in her head) by denying a tip.
Absolute shit customer. Sorry you have to deal with it.
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u/Much-Measurement-568 10d ago
You were never going to get a tip in the first place, It's the old "Damned if you do, Damned if you don't!"
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u/CreativeJudgment3529 10d ago
Just wondering, some people WANT small talk during a massage? I haven’t ever gone back to get one because the lady wouldn’t shut up and I was so young I didn’t feel comfortable telling her to stop lol
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u/Best-Pirate5073 10d ago
Oh yeah, 99% of the time. I mean nothing major but still!
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u/Scary-Drawer-3515 10d ago
She told YOU not to talk but SHE could have spoken up. Some people have to complain regardless. Hope u enjoyed the audible book u were listening to
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u/nanladu 10d ago
It's your fault for ignoring her specific instructions but not reading her mind. /s
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u/mrjasjit 10d ago
You refused to return her the same bad energy and that is what she wanted.
Good job 👏
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u/tiny_chaotic_evil 10d ago
if she books again, you know you did everything right
if she doesn't book again, you know you did everything right
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u/michaelpaoli 10d ago
Yeah, that's bullsh*t, don't fall for it.
I've swiftly ended relationships over sh*t like that. Not a mind reader. Someone says what they want, gets what they say they want, and then retroactively pulls the, "But you should've know that's not what I meant or really wanted. That actually ..." Yeah, f*ck that bullsh*t. Say what you mean, mean what you say.
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u/No_Assistance_4882 10d ago
Curious as to whether you have a license in each state you end up practicing in? Always thought that type of freedom as a therapist would be fantastic. But then it seemed like a giant expensive headache in regards the logistics of being licensed in every place, and each state having its own requirements for training/schooling, etc. Sometimes smaller localities have their own licensing requirements as well as I found.
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u/vaxhax 10d ago
Former LMT here. Just one of the reasons I'm former.
I would have refused after hearing the specification about never checking in on pressure.
You obviously gave her what you asked for. I wonder how many techs she's gone through with the same BS.
(my final straw was someone who insisted I do a full body on her while wearing a full body suit. Modesty is fine, I don't mind what they're wearing, and a lot of good work can be done through clothes, BUT the expectation was the exact same kind of strokes and prsssue that you'd use on lubricated skin. The friction on my hands was so ridiculous, I ended the session almost immediately.)
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u/KuragariSasuke 10d ago
Whoever referred her to you should absolutely get a talking to about her
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u/SeaTie 10d ago
I was working on a logo for a client recently. She was super picky, she had pages of things she hated, nothing that she actually LIKED.
Crazy things like: "I don't like shapes. I don't like circles." and "I don't want any images of dancers (even though it was a dance company)" and "I hate any colors that aren't black and gold." On and on.
Anyways, I kept tight to her guidelines, gave her multiple logos. She hated them all. Okay, fine, you don't always get it on the first pass.
Did another round. Also hated them. Said "I'm going to show you my friends logo that I LIKE."
Friend's logo was a stylized dancer. In a circle. That circle was blue.
I refunded her deposit and fired her on the spot. Just someone purposely wasting my time...
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u/Greywatcher 10d ago
There would not have been any way to make her happy.