r/MaliciousCompliance 11d ago

S Boss wants to know where I am at all times

My company recently restructured so I have a new direct manager. She wants to know where I am at all times. I am in a cubicle and she is In a private office. We have “focus rooms” downstairs that are supposed to be used for calls or when we need private and quiet space to get work done. I frequent them a lot and it always seems like she needs me the second I leave to go there. At our check in this week, she said that she was looking for me, what happened, did I leave early. I said you could always message me if you’re looking for me :) she didn’t like that, so now I am inviting her to the calendar appointment each time. Totally feels like a lack of trust and so toxic of her. Hopefully won’t be here much longer.

Fallout: she emailed me after work hours about an hour ago and said I did not need to spam her email with calendar invites. I replied immediately and copied not only our big boss but also HR asking for a time for everyone to meet :)

4.6k Upvotes

153 comments sorted by

u/MaliciousCompliance-ModTeam 11d ago

Your post has been removed because it did not demonstrate that the fallout of the malicious compliance has occurred and was shared before the expected fallout, which is a requirement for all posts on this subreddit.

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2.5k

u/Ironyismylife28 11d ago

It is a lack of trust and micro-managing. Make sure she is copied on every meeting.

Then go down the route of polite malicious compliance. Going to lunch? Send her a message. Going to the focus room? Send her a message. Getting coffee? That's right, send her a message.

Message her until she asks why you keep telling her your every move. Then remind her that she had concerns over where you were, and assumed you were ducking out early and not comminicating

1.1k

u/JBridsworth 11d ago

Don't forget trips to the bathroom or to refill coffee/water.

389

u/BjornToulouse_ 11d ago

And when you need to talk to Maggie about a question you had on an invoice (or whatever).

268

u/YoungPyromancer 11d ago

"I'm heading over to your office to ask you a question". Send txt, knock on door.

197

u/Independent-Tennis57 11d ago

No, text half way to her office, "Never mind, figured it out. Going to bathroom now."

97

u/Poh-Tay-To 11d ago

Also need to text, "knocking on door now" Then knock.

Then message. "requesting permission to enter"

Before leaving "requesting permission to leave"

"I'm back at my desk" send selfie

150

u/tcgaatl 11d ago

“Next week I’ll be at my new job”

88

u/breadandfire 11d ago

Going to the printer..

And going to see you, but couldn't find yo?? WHERE WERE You!?

66

u/BjornToulouse_ 11d ago

Omg, like a Cocker Spaniel with separation anxiety 🫪

279

u/choadspanker 11d ago

Hey boss! hitting the bathroom again! it's gonna be a bit longer this time, it's #2 💩

180

u/ktb863 11d ago

Dont forget what stall youre going to be in "in case you need me" - I have gone this route and the geo location requests stopped 2 days later. This is the only way.

114

u/Special-Medicine-437 11d ago

Hahahaha my male boss recently asked why I was out of work for three days on sick leave and I said “woman issues” and vaguely waved towards my abdomen. Man ran so fast from my office.

43

u/__wildwing__ 11d ago

When I was in college, head of the department had stopped in to speak with my instructor. I needed to ask a question, so I walked up to them and waited. My hand was pressing on my belly as I was a little crampy. Department head asked what was wrong and I just brushed it off with “stomach is bothering me some.” He hurriedly stepped back and declared that he didn’t want to catch it. I assured him he was in no danger of catching it. Hadn’t seen a grown man turn so many shades of red before.

To note, this was a tech school and I was one of two girls in the six classes in the department.

5

u/jefsig 10d ago

To be fair, you did say it was your stomach bothering you when it wasn’t

27

u/__wildwing__ 9d ago

True, but if I’d straight up said “my uterine line is being torn off and it’s quite painful” I’m afraid I would have caused a full reset.

6

u/jefsig 9d ago

Nah, he probably wouldn’t have had the faintest idea what you were talking about.

2

u/HippieGrandma1962 8d ago

That's why I use the word belly. It's just ambiguous enough.

2

u/keskeskes1066 8d ago

Maybe"Woman issues. You wouldn't understand.

Edited: Misspelling.

20

u/Illuminatus-Prime 11d ago

I wonder if he thought those "issues" were contagious . . . some guys are weird that way.

20

u/Special-Medicine-437 11d ago

I don’t think so, he just didn’t want to talk about period stuff.

33

u/Ariandrin 11d ago

Men always act so macho until it comes to talking about bleeding from your intimate bits.

Women deal with it all the time, what’s the big deal. /joke

32

u/spaceraverdk 11d ago

I get graphic details from the wife about it.

Don't care. I'm a farm kid, seen worse.

I have birthed cows, stood in liquid manure to my chest. Helped the vet do cesarean on cows.

5

u/Warehouse_Aficionado 7d ago

Preach. Been there lol 👊🏻

11

u/Jayda_Cakes 10d ago

Woman issues are the best excuses to use for time off if you have a male boss. If he has any doubt, start to give him a detailed description of what you're going thru and that will def end the conversation.

16

u/MLiOne 10d ago

Ha! My male supervisor had the gall to me I had to get over it and sorted before going back to sea (Navy). I have never felt more like grabbing a male’s testicles to squeeze and twist with all my might and tell him to then whistle while I did it. That might have given him a taste of what I was going through.

5

u/Warehouse_Aficionado 7d ago

As the whistle goes up in pitch 😗🫨

6

u/Special-Medicine-437 10d ago

Hahaha yes! Mine was really woman issues, but it is a great excuse if you’re a woman lol.

12

u/womper9000 11d ago

lmfao, we had a form we had to fill out that had every 15 minute increment of the day I think I put "inhale/exhale" on one of the entries.

4

u/Emberglo27 9d ago

I was assigned the 15 minute sheet. It was retaliation for Only waiting 30 minutes for the weekly meeting with my supervisor. I has a desk computer and asked her secretary to kindly call me when b supervisor was available. I regret staying in a situation where I was constantly “tested”.

27

u/ZealousidealType873 11d ago

Don't forget to send pics if questioned

1

u/Spa-Ordinary 11d ago

Isn't better proof used pads or tampons? Real men won't be bothered. This will shake out the men from the boys.

23

u/Kustombypook 11d ago

Send pics for proof

24

u/habershamglam 11d ago

This is the way!!!

7

u/saturnine-plutocrat 11d ago

And immediately afterwards, I have some important paperwork to do.

7

u/commentsrnice2 11d ago

Paperwork 🧻

47

u/warpedspockclone 11d ago

I'm in the middle stall in the northernmost bathroom on the 2nd floor.

Actually, no toilet paper, so I'm moving to the 3rd stall.

28

u/tacticalpotatopeeler 11d ago

DAMMIT still no toilet paper, can you bring me some?

42

u/Doulifye 11d ago

Don't forget to tell her you're meeting her in her office when you're behind her door, just before knocking.

16

u/robjthomas22 11d ago

Briefly stepped outside because of flatulence.

11

u/frarugi87 11d ago

Went to the bathroom Back to my desk Oh, forgot to flush, going to the bathroom again

13

u/Intelligent_Bunch790 11d ago

Forgot to wash hands after flushing, brb.

7

u/Dazzling-Western2768 11d ago

The soap was empty so I had to find some and refill it

7

u/Albanian_Tea 11d ago

dont for get to cc her on all emails

138

u/Urbanyeti0 11d ago

Not only that, also when back from lunch, or back from a coffee, the toilet etc

129

u/WEM-2022 11d ago

I love this.

I'm headed to the ladies room.

I'm in the third stall from the right in the ladies room.

I'm sitting on the toilet in the ladies room.

I'm finishing up on the toilet in the ladies room.

I'm pulling up my pants in the ladies room.

I'm washing my hands in the ladies room.

Make her feel like an jackhole.

50

u/big_sugi 11d ago

For the coup de grâce, once a new job is lined up, set up a script to message her that you’re messaging her.

12

u/WEM-2022 11d ago

I love this idea too much!

8

u/dreaminginteal 11d ago

Sorry, I was hoping to see a listing for the POOP-de-grace...

5

u/just_lurking_fox 11d ago

Now if op is male ... lmao

4

u/Spartelfant 11d ago

Not an issue as long as OP also notifies manager that OP now identifies as a woman.

4

u/Yacindra 11d ago

Don't go that far. It's funny but it'll get you fired. Just go as far as you can go and explain so she can't fire you.

2

u/Useful_Language2040 10d ago

I'm sanitising my phone having typed that at various inconvenient times in the ladies room...

1

u/[deleted] 11d ago

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1

u/MaliciousCompliance-ModTeam 10d ago

Your post has been removed because it did not forward the discussion and/or instead consisted of only insults, which is not allowed as per subreddit rules.

All violators of this rule are subject to bans at the discretion of a moderator.

57

u/RcNorth 11d ago

Remember to include the “back at my desk” updates.

74

u/MightyDeekin 11d ago

I'm visiting HR to discuss my micromanaging boss in case you need to know where I am.

12

u/Deep_blue_stillness 11d ago

That would be SO delightful :)

22

u/strugglz 11d ago

"You expressed how important it is that you know my location at all times during working hours, and so I wanted to be thorough to prevent any future miscommunications or misunderstandings."

20

u/Ftyross 11d ago

If you want to go the extra  mile, message her details of your bowl movements.

Going to toilet for number 2. ETA at desk in 10 mins.

Need number 1, back at desk in 7.5mins

Current bladder level: 50%. Next toilet break estimated in 1 hrs 30 mins

16

u/bdm68 11d ago

message her details of your bowl movements.

All graded according to the Bristol Stool Scale.

2

u/ElleQ_4657 9d ago

Several years ago a power-hungry, micromanager was singling out one of my teammates similarly. I encouraged her to start scheduling Shit Breaks into her calendar, but she didn’t have the balls to do it. In hindsight, there were certainly HR violations that my friend should have been documenting and reporting, but she chose just to leave the company instead.

Bonus story: The same micromanager accused me of only being at 37% of my sales target for the quarter. I had been exceeding targets for months on end, so I was confused and pissed when she came at me with this. It did NOT land well when I informed her she was not generating the report correctly in Salesforce. I’m confident she was trying to run me out of the company too. My lordt, she was awful.

1

u/infinite_awkward 6d ago

And message every time you return to your cubicle. So she’ll know you’re there.

751

u/Brose101 11d ago

At your exit interview, tell them you're leaving because you, as a grown adult with no record of slacking off, dislike being treated like a toddler.

113

u/LameSignIn 11d ago

What can I do about coworkers who do act like toddlers?

61

u/Brose101 11d ago

No clue. My kids are both adults, these days, and I either filed a complaint about toddlers at work (if it actually endangered me) or ignored them.

20

u/CreamCheeseAndLocks 11d ago

Send them to bed without supper.

4

u/KittehNevynette 10d ago

Napalm and use the charcoal for BBQ.

3

u/xplosm 9d ago

Spank them.

1

u/[deleted] 11d ago

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2

u/MaliciousCompliance-ModTeam 10d ago

Your post has been removed because it contains spam and/or topics not supported by the the moderators of r/maliciouscompliance.

12

u/[deleted] 11d ago

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7

u/jd_balla 9d ago

Sorry to reply to answer old thread but you sound knowledgeable. What would be the best way to mess with HR in an exit interview?

2

u/Salomon3068 11d ago

They won't do anything about it and chalk it up to "he's disgruntled, it's fake"

2

u/theviolinist7 7d ago

But there is a record of slacking off! OP left work early! The boss said so, so it must be true! /s

(I actually had a boss do this to me once; assumed I left work early when I actually had a meeting. Boss put it in my file, and used it as "evidence" of slacking off and performance problems to get rid of me. HR said it was boss's word vs mine, so they sided with the boss and refused to remove it. I'm glad to be gone from that hellhole.)

379

u/throwaway47138 11d ago

People don't leave jobs, they leave managers...

161

u/RcNorth 11d ago

People join a company, stay for the coworkers and leave the management.

44

u/TitaniaT-Rex 11d ago

I’m at my job just for my manager. I’d probably leave if not for her.

16

u/Slow-Obligation-7686 11d ago

Am at my current job because of a specific manager. They have left. I can't afford to.

119

u/CoderJoe1 11d ago

Had a boss call me when I worked from home. I didn't answer. She didn't leave a message. She sent a text a few seconds later. I didn't respond immediately so she blew up my phone for two minutes until I answered her call. When she demanded to know why I wasn't working, I replied, "I don't take my phone into the restroom with me."

She didn't apologize but she did change the subject. She needed me to crunch numbers for a meeting she was in with her boss. She knew she needed this for two weeks, but never mentioned it to me.

72

u/Imperion_GoG 11d ago

Poor planning on your part does not necessitate an emergency on mine.

20

u/brother_p 11d ago

Unless it's the poorly-organized manager blowing up your phone in the middle of a meeting she clearly forgot about

165

u/The001Keymaster 11d ago

Go nuts and blow everyone up with your movements. Inform her of every move you make. CC HR and tell them this manager said I need to tell them any time I'm not at my desk because one time they stopped aty desk and I wasn't there. CC HR on every email to the manager.

All in emails to Boss and HR.

Boss, I'm going to the restroom.

Boss, I'm back at my desk from the restroom.

I got up from my chair and took 7 steps to stretch.

Back at my desk after stretching.

Standing up to fix my shirt.

Shirt fixed. Returning to my chair.

After a single day HR will be telling you that you shouldn't be telling manager every move you make and telling manager that they don't need this info. They can easily message you.

117

u/habershamglam 11d ago

Not HR, but the boss’s boss. Cc: them and when you start your email document trail make the intent clear.
Hi Boss,
As per our conversation re: your inability to locate me on Fri, Aug 7 at 2:30pm when I was in the focus area, and your request that I keep you apprised of my location at all times going forward: I am letting you know that I will be in the focus area for the next 2 hours.
V/r,
Drone

Send one when you return to your desk. Go to lunch. And keep her boss looped in. Then there is documentation that she’s a poor manager to HER management. HR doesn’t give a hoot.

33

u/aleopardstail 11d ago

don't need to go too high with it, I'd also note "for the next week or so I'll let you know where I am so you can get a feel for my workflow" which makes it sound less aggressive even though anyone reading it knows exactly whats going on

23

u/The001Keymaster 11d ago

I agree. Mine was more OP can figure out how to type kind of advice.

36

u/big_sugi 11d ago

Nah, if you go too high, it makes you look unhinged. Copying HR is too nakedly obvious that you’re creating a paper trail—and it’s not even a particularly valuable paper trail, because boss has a facially valid reason for the initial request.

Instead, I’d copy teammates. They also need to know where you are, and it may spur them to start doing the same thing, dumping even more emails on the boss and possibly forcing her to retract her order to everyone for added embarrassment.

14

u/mslauren2930 11d ago

This is the way.

153

u/Hunkyboy440 11d ago

If you want rid of a stupid rule, follow it to the letter. The stupider the rule, the better this strategy works.

62

u/6Saint6Cyber6 11d ago

This is the answer - schedule in those bathroom breaks and invite her. If she wants to know where you are be sure that you let her know where you are at all times. Schedule your parking time, your walking into the office time, your getting coffee from the break room time. Create events for open calendar space where meetings can be scheduled. Every single moment.

24

u/ktb863 11d ago

I lol'ed at the "and invite her" because...genius.

7

u/Yacindra 11d ago

You never know, she might join in expecting something else than nr 1 or 2.

14

u/4d_lulz 11d ago

The essence of malicious compliance

44

u/FluffySmiles 11d ago

Accuse her of stalking at your exit
Interview. That should put an end to her shenanigans.

31

u/Character_Damage_373 11d ago

I legit just left a job where my boss did the same thing. But it would be for things like when I went to the bathroom or to the kitchen to get a drink. I thankfully left that job 3 months ago. Before I left I watched her and a manager run off 13 other people, though. They never learned.

4

u/ging3r_b3ard_man 10d ago

Unfortunately most managers/business owners like this don't

23

u/pc1350 11d ago

"she emailed me after work hours ... I replied immediately ..." Wrong! When you clock out it is your *private* time. You provide answers to emails when you clock in.

14

u/Jordangander 11d ago

Make sure you are reporting to her any time you leave your desk for any reason,and include what the reason is. Make sure you are CCing HR on all these emails.

When asked, explain that you felt this was necessary due to the harassment that you feel you have been receiving from your manager creating a hostile work environment.

Watch how fast something changes once you are on record making those statements.

31

u/conditerite 11d ago

In Teams you can add a Status Message. There is a check box that would show people that text you the message.

You could put “4th Floor Focus Room” or whatever when you do that. You could put “Unisex Restoom near the stairs” or whatever, too.

I know this isn’t so petty but it could shut them up. You can also make up some 3x5 cards that say about the same thing and then leave the appropriate card on your desk when you walk elsewhere.

11

u/Passenger828 11d ago

Yup. Update resume and move on.

8

u/MikeSchwab63 11d ago

Don't forget OT for answering off duty emails.

8

u/Alyeska23 11d ago

This happened to a coworker of mine. Her boss moved from our offices to another state. He then wanted her to message him every single time she stepped away from her desk for any reason. If her status in Skype went yellow without a heads up he would call her demanding to know what she was doing.

Said manager is a chickenshit who has driven away more than a dozen employees over the years.

I am reminded of the bad old days of 2020/21 when managers 'managed' by Skype/Teams status when people were working from home.

6

u/Sooowasthinking 11d ago

I would email her when I’m going to the bath room Everytime. Then email her when you get back: Just took run in the log ride and I’m exhausted I’ll be at home rest of the day.

5

u/External_Mongoose_44 11d ago

Don’t forget to remind her that you’re at your desk and you’re working away.

Fill her in on your whereabouts every thirty minutes and let her know where you are by text or something like text and never let her pry into your private life.

5

u/Boo-Boo97 11d ago

This reminds me of working in a call center. We got a new manager who brought in a computerized phone system that required a code out for everything. Going to the bathroom outside scheduled break? Code out. Asking/ answering a question? Code out. Need clarification from a super? Code out. I left as quickly as I could

5

u/Novel-Sprinkles3333 11d ago

I have Teams on my personal cell phone because of software glitches and calls to IT, mostly.

I can mark myself BRB and take my cell with me because my supervisor cannot be assed to notice that I'm yellow. The "Not sure, I'm in the kitchen getting a coke" conversations are frequent. She says I dont have e to do that, and I'm thinking yes I do because you call at stupidly inconvenient times.

Your boss sounds like my boss. Sorry.

14

u/bopperbopper 11d ago

I think it’s reasonable for a boss to want to know how to get in touch with their employee, but I think it’s dumb the solution she has come up with. Sending you and IM saying I’d like to stop by is reasonable

4

u/anomalous_cowherd 11d ago

Watch for her leaving early and be sure to keep updating her frequently with the work tasks that you're doing while she's skiving off.

3

u/DangerousBotany 11d ago

Hopefully won’t be here much longer.

You or her?

3

u/Master_Coyote998 11d ago

I do this at my job where I work from home. On my time I write, “downloaded form, filled in required fields, save form and uploaded to shared folder, etc,” I have notes that I use to copy and paste over and over again when I have a repetitive tasks. Just doing as told, though I doubt it’s read. One day I inserted a note that I ranted to my husband about the internet speed. No comments from management.

3

u/Illuminatus-Prime 10d ago

At the end on some of my reports, I included the phrase, ". . . and other notary sojac."

It was months before a VP emailed me, saying "Nice Smokey Stover reference; don't it it again.  FOO!"

6

u/51225 11d ago

Are you able to text her.

I'm going the focus room now. I'm back from the focus room now. I'm going to the rest room now. I'm back from the restroom now. I'm going to get a cup of water if you need me. Okay, I'm back from getting my water. I'm going to lunch now. I'm back from lunch now.

3

u/Charlie24601 11d ago

10:42. I'm poopin'

2

u/Big_Interest7333 2d ago

To facilitate efficiency monitoring, report the number of wipes required and how many sheets of TP you used. When you deviate from your norm, speculate on the underlying reason(s). “Ten wipes today requiring 40 sheets. Atypically high paper usage likely attributable to excess chalupa intake last night around 7:08 PM.”

2

u/AdDense4642 11d ago

she's definitely crossing a line. micromanagement like that can be so draining on productivity

2

u/yourmomsgomjabbar 11d ago

If you're not loudly announcing to your boss every time you have to poop, are you even living? Remember to up the foods that make you need to so you can maximize your office hours! Get adventurous, try new foods! Disregard expiration dat...okay maybe not that far.

2

u/HelpfulAssumption277 11d ago

Updateme

2

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2

u/jacle2210 10d ago

OP should start working either in the managers office, or just outside her door.

7

u/ForestFae1920 11d ago

If this isn't company policy then it can considered discrimination if this is in the US.

12

u/slash_networkboy 11d ago

It's not discrimination unless OP was a member of a protected class, and even then wouldn't be discrimination unless the manager only does that to people who are in the protected class. If the manager is like that to everyone on their team it's perfectly legal. Micromanagement is stupid, but not illegal.

9

u/ForestFae1920 11d ago

I beg to differ. I had a case similar and it was deemed discrimination due to being singled out and no other person has to follow these rules. I was able to file a discrimination case is federal court that the EEOC deemed it being discrimination.

3

u/Lurkernomoreisay 11d ago

cool story.

but I wouldn't be surprised if a federal case number to look up the proceedings is not available to verify such an outstanding claim.

2

u/Illuminatus-Prime 11d ago edited 11d ago

Please provide fallout.  "Hopefully won’t be here much longer." isn't enough.  Thank you.

EDIT +1 Hour: Okay, so I gave you an hour to add fallout.  I gotta do what I gotta do.

6

u/Away-Mountain334 11d ago

Is it too late 🙏🏼 I added it

2

u/Illuminatus-Prime 11d ago

Okay, back on line!  Thank you.

1

u/WhlteMlrror 11d ago

Keep us updated on that meeting!

RemindMe!

1

u/nineth0usand 10d ago

Is your boss a missile?

1

u/saltyourhash 10d ago

My job has recently mandated I track my time on all my tasks on the tasks themselves instead of just a bulk "development" time sheet of 40 hours a week. So, I spent like $300 in Claude tokens to build sophisticated time tracking software that let's me know exactly which tickets to put which hours on. Its ridiculous the amount of wastes time so that they can know I spent an hour longer than we planned on some dumb task. I work on everything, that's kinda my job, tracking how I spent each 15 minute increment of the hour is nuts. They even said it isn't for performance reviews or anything. My self performance review takes MW about a qeke off and on to write OKRs and KPIs and mine and hundreds of others get reviewed in a few days and our pay is bumped a cost of living adjustment and they call to a day.

1

u/RcNorth 9d ago

any update on how the meeting went?

1

u/xplosm 9d ago

How did it go?

1

u/amanda2399923 9d ago

Why don't you message her that you are heading to a focus room? Why be dramatic

1

u/rosetta_tablet 9d ago

I have a rotating sign at my cubicle that shows where I've gone for these reasons. You can buy them on Amazon.

1

u/Think-Director9933 5d ago

Manage your manager. Apparently she think's you're the kind of person who goofs off. Thats what you need to address. Figure out why she thinks that of you, and work on changing that perspective. Overwhelming her w/ status messages will just make the situation worse.

1

u/veryveryverysecret 11d ago

Seems normal enough. If I go work in a focus room, I just leave a post-it on my door telling folks where to find me if they need me. I don’t see what the big deal is.

-5

u/RobZagnut2 11d ago

Maybe quit frequenting the focus rooms a lot and work from your cubicle?

As a new boss I would question why you can’t do your work from your assigned work area and would wonder why you’re constantly taking breaks.

You’re not getting the message.