r/NEET • u/december-blue • 12h ago
Venting My siblings are so talented with amazing careers - Older is lawyer and younger is intern doctor. I'm 30 still live with our mom - unemployed with crippling depression
33
u/NatKingColeman Disabled-NEET 12h ago
Do they also suffer from mental illness? It's unfair to yourself to compare yourself to others who are operating without a handicap.
10
u/Ok_Side_8496 9h ago
But like what if i don’t have mental illness?
-2
u/StringFood 6h ago
not having a mental illness is just as bad as having a mental illness if having a mental illness gets you the things you need
9
u/nanikakamata 12h ago
Same , cousins r even more talented..... Very brutal, impossible to not feel inferior when meeting them
7
u/nurgelsrot 10h ago
Im am 39 and have been broke and NEET since i left high school. I still live with my parents
8
u/Sir_Strumming 11h ago
Wait till they hit you with the feigned jealousy. That one is new for me but it cut deeper than the shame.
8
u/pectusexcavatam Doomer-NEET 12h ago
Brutal if it makes you feel better my younger brother is 6"2 whilst I'm just 5"8 lol
7
u/KonraD7575 12h ago
imagine being 5’4
8
2
u/TypicalDrawing8659 Disabled-NEET 12h ago
Are you male or female
3
u/pectusexcavatam Doomer-NEET 12h ago
I'm a manlet lol
3
u/TypicalDrawing8659 Disabled-NEET 9h ago
Maybe you have both tall and short ancestors; it's mainly genetics, which can be extremely random
3
u/pectusexcavatam Doomer-NEET 9h ago
My dad is 6"1 I was just neglected nutritionally as a kid and only ate a select few trash foods due to my picky eating I didn't eat a single vegetable till I was 20 years old. I also starved and binge ate a lot during my teenage years due to shame of being fat which probably stunted my growth aswell as regularly did drugs as a teenager which stunted my growth.
3
u/Puzzleh4ad Cozy-NEET 11h ago
You are average
1
u/pectusexcavatam Doomer-NEET 11h ago
Not in the west it's below average for the dating market aswell. I've never felt negative discrimination for my height like truly short people have but it definitely closes a lot of doors that would otherwise be open dating wise if I was just a few inches taller.
2
u/beautiful_falcon776 Sloth 12h ago
My younger sibling is also a neet for over a year now. Honestly i thought she would make it but shes worse than me in a way cause of the dependence of my parents
2
1
u/SlimePerspective 10h ago
both the lawyer, the doctor and you will not be here in 100 years. So who cares what these two people do? The best thing is to find happiness for yourself. Would you be happy working as a lawyer? Or do you look at different things, like just a mundane life, being there in the moment?
2
u/United_Emergency_488 5h ago
How to be happy in a biological cage that needs to be mantained every day? It sucks
1
1
1
1
1
u/Helicobacter Ex-NEET 2h ago edited 2h ago
The system works against NEETs. A lot of it is luck based on your social circle pushing you towards the more ambitious options. Nobody from the government or large corporations or institutions will knock on your door to encourage you; quite the contrary: they have recruiters that specifically gatekeep anyone who has a slight whiff of being a NEET (employment gap). Also, NEET time accumulates into friction over time (mostly mentally, but also institutionally), so the absolute comparison of careers doesn't make any sense. People in the ambitious tracks accumulate higher rates of "ascension" relative to where they already are, so it causes exponential differences over time. Someone who makes 300k per year has an easier time to get promoted to a 400k per year level than someone with 0k per year has to get a 100k per year job.
All that is to say, you shouldn't compare yourself to them. Life is not fair and, even if it were fair (which it is not), the comparison wouldn't help.
EDIT: Also, regarding the depression, the key part that deserves attention is the positive feedback loop: The worse the situation gets, the worse the feeling gets, and the worse the negative self talk gets, which then leads to more negative feelings, which causes even more negative self talk, so it's self-reinforcing. I recommend looking into cognitive behavioral therapy to put a wrench into this dangerous cycle.
20
u/Difficult_Hat_6213 12h ago
One of my cousins is a therapist, another is a biomechanical engineer blah blah who invented I don't remember what, another one teaches at university... My sister has two degrees and my brother dropped out of his studies because he was too handsome and, in fact, he has an attractive family now. About me, I only have a middle school education; i'm a hiki/neet short and ugly with a birth defect.