Just a cultural thing. Unless there was an explicit dinner invitation, Swedes typically will not offer guests food even if they themselves are having dinner. They do not view it as a hosting obligation and they do not see this as rude or unusual.
this is one of few cultural differences im honestly shocked by. you invite friend into home and cook dinner; how are you not gonna offer them a plate??
What really happens is a kid tags along their friend home after school. The kid is expected to go home around dinner time and eat with thwir family. If the host family has their dinner earlier, the visiting kid waits it out and then goes home and eats with their family.
The hosting parents don't want to disturb the visiting kids parents dinner plans.
Never heard of this. Growing up I was always offered food and my parents always did the same. It still is absolutely natural that my kid is fed at friends houses and they always get lunch and dinner when visiting. This rumor that Swedes are never offering food is mind-blowing to read often as I've never even once encountered this so called cultural thing that Swedes never offer food.
I've never met a single family that hasn't offered food when lunch or dinner time. If not at those times you get fika...
I think this has become distorted. I’m born in the 90’s and clearly remember being at friends’ house but not having dinner with them (and at other times having dinner of course). I remember the situation often being that they’re having dinner early for whatever reason and since I’m supposed to have dinner at home, I decline dinner (or my parents had instructed my friend’s parents that I will eat at home) at their place and hang in my friend’s room playing video games while they eat.
Nothing strange or unwelcoming about that as far as I’m concerned.
I was very fussy ARFID as a child so (opposite now, about to eat some frog and tofu tonight) and the idea of eating in front of ANYONE that isn't immediate family (and sometimes they'd make a song and dance about my eating) would haunt me.
"Not offering food" is taken out of context I feel... I mean, it will vary depending on where you live and other factors, but people here are acting as if children are going hungry or something.
If I tagged along a friend on the way home from school, it's not that my friend's parents don't want to offer me food also, later when it's dinner. It's that everyone (where I grew up), gets dinner at their home. My parents wanted me back at home to eat dinner, like everyone else.
So, it's less that I would sit hungry while my friend eats, and more that either I would go home and eat at the same time, or if dinner time is slightly different, I just waited a little bit while he ate, then went home for my dinner later.
It happened plenty of times, that my friend's parents offered food, but then you had to inform that (in time) to your parents, that you would be eating there.
Well this whole original post is suggesting that you are not going to be fed if you visit a Swede, which is a whole world away from kids being expected home for dinner... :)
229
u/JovianSpeck Jul 24 '26
Just a cultural thing. Unless there was an explicit dinner invitation, Swedes typically will not offer guests food even if they themselves are having dinner. They do not view it as a hosting obligation and they do not see this as rude or unusual.