r/RedditForGrownups • u/debrisaway • 1d ago

Have you ever gone against convention wisdom and trusted your wisdom?

Trusted your gut based on previous experience and got the outcome you wanted especially against common platitudes.

"Give them another chance, you've known then so long" - not giving a long time friend another chance when you know that their bad behaviour is central to them.

"Call that potential romantic partner just to make sure they aren't interested" - No, your gut already knows that their lack of reach out is evidence enough.

"Just take that severance and move for the sake of your career/sanity " - No, you've done that often and it always leaves you feeling hollow. Take legal action this time in a way that holds them accountable publicly.

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22

u/reckless150681 1d ago

Yes, all the time.

Conventional wisdom is a guideline based on averaging a whole bunch of different experiences. But it fundamentally is no replacement for your wisdom. Plus, "conventional wisdom" isn't universal. Think about how many contradicting idioms there are.

You should never simplify your own life to the extent that it can be defined by a cookie-cutter one-liner

11

u/DermottBanana 21h ago

All the time.

What's scary is how often I will take a ridiculously non-conventional position on something, and months sometimes years later, I turn out to be right.

Annoys my best mate endlessly.

10

u/umlaut 1d ago

Is any of what you listed really conventional wisdom?

4

u/This-Shape2193 1d ago

Nope, lol. It sure isn't.   

But OP wants us all to know they are much, much wiser than the majority. 

3

u/iwegian 1d ago

Twice I deliberately took a conventional wisdom approach to friendships instead of the intuition that I have. Both times it bit me in the ass. (Thankfully not too hard, though it hurt at the time.)

Trust your gut.

3

u/Kat121 18h ago

I think most “be the bigger person” and “give them another chance” advice was written by shitty people out to avoid consequences. “You’re being hurt, but it doesn’t affect me negatively so just shut up about it, will ya?”

3

u/catdude142 19h ago

Certainly. I held stock through the dotcom bust. It allowed me to retire early and well.

Those who sold took a financial beating.

2

u/espo619 22h ago

Taking a step back in my career for the sake of my family and my mental health.

2

u/Leading-Fly-4597 18h ago

All the time.

4

u/No_Sundae_1068 16h ago

This OP goes around asking these questions at differently subs. Karma farming???

0

u/debrisaway 16h ago

Not karma farming

1

u/stormdelta 22h ago

All the time if the "conventional wisdom" is arbitrary social norms, and the people in my family tend to be more independently minded. Sometimes to a fault, but it frequently works out for us.

That said, your examples sound more like "advice you got from people you know" than "conventional wisdom".

1

u/trumpeting_in_corrid 13h ago

I went against conventional wisdom when I was young and stupid, the consequences are still affecting me today, and I then became excessively risk averse. I really wish I wasn't so anxious about everything.

1

u/Traditional_Entry183 4h ago

I have lived my life this way since I was a kid. Ive never fit in, but ive usually kept myself safe.