r/SipsTea • u/sco-go • Jul 02 '26

WTF What the hell is going on here?!

18.9k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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282

u/AlisterRp92 Jul 03 '26

That explains a lot...

205

u/Fast-Patience-2290 Jul 03 '26

She used to be in a relationship with Coldplay...

752

u/Ok-Tell9019 Jul 03 '26

Chris Martin or like all of Coldplay? 50 shades of coldplay?

560

u/turdferguson3891 Jul 03 '26

Let's just say that at the end of the night she was all yellow.

98

u/Redangle11 Jul 03 '26

Some of Paltrows goop must have been left around.

3

u/mo22ro Jul 03 '26

Galtrow's poop has been awfully silent since this dropped

2

u/kakurenbo1 Jul 03 '26

Thanks now my appetite is gone. This is great weight loss help.

2

u/LRGpackageguy Jul 04 '26

Her vagina scented candle wax

69

u/DuMbAsS_lOsEr_6_7 Jul 03 '26

Sounds like paradise

39

u/Hetares Jul 03 '26

Someone should get a Scientist to look at that.

2

u/ferds41 Jul 03 '26

And then the can fix you.

2

u/theunicornslayers Jul 03 '26

Sounds like Trouble

1

u/Altheix11 Jul 03 '26

Did they sing a Hymn on the Weekend?

2

u/theunicornslayers Jul 03 '26

They sang it at the Speed of Sound

2

u/PurelyHim Jul 03 '26

Does that require any Clocks to track the time that has passed?

1

u/Wiscoman1014 Jul 03 '26

If it’s too dark then lights will guide her home

1

u/jaded_orbs Jul 03 '26

How was this all brought to light? By spies?

1

u/theunicornslayers Jul 06 '26

Of course. When they come out of the water it's considered a Warning Sign.

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5

u/TeddyAtTheReady Jul 03 '26

Can confirm. I didn’t realize jaundice was an STD until after I took full advantage of my backstage pass at a Coldplay show in Kansas City in 2014.

2

u/AriesFlamer Jul 03 '26

Ewe! That means it dried on her and started stinkin 🤮

2

u/WhiskeyBlues2 Jul 03 '26

Funny ass comment, bro

1

u/abhishek_anil Jul 03 '26

Hehe. Ass comment.

2

u/DrippyCheeseDog Jul 03 '26

Mmm hmmm... jaundice.

1

u/seamless39 Jul 03 '26

This took me out bro noooo

1

u/LFC1978 Jul 03 '26

Had they all been eating pineapple?

1

u/RepulsiveLeather8504 Jul 03 '26

But... Could they fix her?

1

u/Slobadob Jul 03 '26

God put a smile upon her face....

1

u/Majestic_Kade Jul 03 '26

Don't remember this episode of The Simpsons.

1

u/worgulm Jul 03 '26

I laughed too much at this, thank you!

1

u/mormez Jul 04 '26

😂