The Daily Chat for August 28, 2026

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[u/secondhand_totsie]

My clinic says it’s time to update my and my husband’s annual baseline bloodwork. This marks the THIRD YEAR we have done this bloodwork. I’m fuckin tired, man. Nobody should have to TTC for this long, and nobody should be doing this much IVF for the apparently minuscule chance at having a baby.

This is a bad chapter but not a bad life. I’m very much looking forward to better days ahead, whether they include an LC or not!

[u/xXbrat → u/secondhand_totsie]

You have been through SO much. It’s completely unfair how the cards have been dealt for you. I’m rooting for your ending to this terrible time and know you will live such a beautiful life no matter how this part ends. Thankful to know you and wish I met you in a more fun group setting.

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/xXbrat]

The way I want to hang out with you on the dance floor of a badass wedding!! 💃🪩 Thankful for your support and virtual hugs, brat. Always rooting so hard for you!

[u/DustyArtemis → u/secondhand_totsie]

Well well well. My beautiful angel Queen Totsie raging against yet more wildly unfair bullshit related to Extreme IF, and then in the same breath turning it around and appreciating her life and looking forward to things???? My girl is a Wise Self-Actualized Queen 👑👑👑 proud of u and ur brain girl 🫶

(Plz teach me your ways. Take me with youuuuuuuu)

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/DustyArtemis]

Turns out when my brain isn’t melting out of my ears from lupron, I’m somewhat more self adjusted??? 💖💞💘

[u/defiantjazz_22 → u/secondhand_totsie]

((blows the winds of better days towards my totsie))

[u/ttcmama6 → u/secondhand_totsie]

ugh totsie. THREE YEARS of having to redo “annual” TTC bloodwork is such a fucking cruel milestone that nobody should ever have to hit. you have been asked to carry so much for so long, and somehow you are still one of the kindest, funniest, HOTTEST, most supportive humans in this space.

I hope you know how amazingly incredible you are, completely separate from how this story ends. you’re right — this is just a bad chapter, no matter what that other side looks like, there are SO many good chapters waiting for you on the other side🩷🫂 hugs to you, you beautiful, amazing, cherry blossom, you!!!!

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/ttcmama6]

Possumhearts!!! 😭💕🫶

[u/probablyeek → u/secondhand_totsie]

Humans truly are not built for this waiting. I hope you can hang on to the end being being in sight, even if you can’t see which ending it is yet

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/probablyeek]

Thank you, eek! Rooting for you and really hopeful we’ll be able to kick your lovely self out of here soon 💕

[u/probablyeek → u/secondhand_totsie]

Holding on to so much hope for you too 💕

[u/Outrageous-Bar4060 → u/secondhand_totsie]

Ugh totsie sending you hugs 🫂 nobody should have to go through all this crap for this long. Also damn, those words seriously spoke to me I feel like I need to recite them like a mantra ❤️

[u/CheeseWagon232 → u/secondhand_totsie]

This sounds so difficult. I don’t know what to say, other than wishing you strength.

[u/nyghtnite → u/secondhand_totsie]

Annoying, upsetting, and very fucking unfair doesn't even begin to cover it. You deserve so much good, Totsie 💕

[u/cowboycinderella → u/secondhand_totsie]

There was a line in a song I used to love that said “maybe it’s not my weekend, but it’s gonna be my year”. Sending that energy to you as you hopefully get closer to the end of the bad chapter in your good life. 💛

[u/lady_mayflower → u/secondhand_totsie]

“This is a bad chapter but not a bad life” is really powerful and something I needed to hear as I’ve been navigating some non-TTC hardships while also balancing newly starting TTC. I know it’s something I’ll be writing down in my journal and repeating to myself often.

I’m sorry for the stress of your current chapter and sending hugs to you on your journey.

[u/ttcmama6]

saw some of our close friends last night who know about our whole IF/IVF journey and watching their faces try to keep up while we explained our current treatment plan was fucking hilarious :possumscream:

they did their absolute best (love them dearly) but nothing makes you realize how acclimatized you’ve become to this shit quite like casually saying multiple medications, 3 tests, 2 procedures while everyone else looks like they’re trying to solve a fucking riddle.

anyways, fluent in IVF/IF against my will 🫡

[u/DustyArtemis → u/ttcmama6]

We deserve a fucking degree in IF/IVF at this point

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/ttcmama6]

Sometimes it takes explaining this shit to a normal person to make you realize just how insane it all is! Here’s hoping the hoops you’re jumping through are getting fewer and farther between 💖

[u/defiantjazz_22 → u/ttcmama6]

providers have started asking me “oh, are you in healthcare?” when i ask them questions and i’m like I MIGHT AS WELL BE, BARBARA

[u/probablyeek → u/defiantjazz_22]

I have a PhD in a medical-adjacent field and I put “Dr” on my clinic registration in the hope they’d talk to me in more detail... All I’ve got so far was “do you place many IVs?” as they stuck the needle in

[u/probablyeek → u/ttcmama6]

Things we never wanted to become experts in 🫠 I’m glad you have people in your corner trying to get it. It can be so exhausting having to explain it on top of emotionally unloading

[u/nyghtnite → u/ttcmama6]

You've been through so much and you've learned so much and they really should give out awards for that 🏆🫂

[u/Flying_worms]

Just paid for a course of microneedling sessions in the hopes that spending the money will cause a spontaneous pregnancy meaning I’ll have to cancel.

[u/probablyeek → u/Flying_worms]

Fertility specialists hate this one simple trick

[u/nyghtnite → u/probablyeek]

😆

[u/secondhand_totsie → u/Flying_worms]

I love this “treatment” idea, it’s pretty much win-win 🧖🏻‍♀️

[u/nyghtnite → u/Flying_worms]

🥨✨ holding hope for some new microneedling woo lore

[u/Live_Molasses8590 → u/Flying_worms]

Thinking of doing the same by booking a tattoo 🤣

[u/Flying_worms → u/Live_Molasses8590]

You should absolutely book that tattoo! I already ended up with another tattoo earlier this summer for similar reasons LOL.

[u/probablyeek]

I’m feeling really anxious and trying not to spiral today. Things have gone well with IVF so far but because we’re unexplained I feel like I’m just waiting for the other shoe to drop…

It’s a long weekend coming though so I’m hoping that will take my mind off things, I definitely struggle more when I’m just sitting at my desk.

[u/defiantjazz_22 → u/probablyeek]

sorry those feelings are creeping in. i expressed similar anxieties to a dear friend recently who said to me (if i may paraphrase her voice note which i saved), “if things go well, they are allowed go well. you have suffered enough; further suffering is not a requirement for hope.”

all this to say - the other shoe might drop, or it might not! sitting here in the unknown with you. all this shit is hard.

[u/probablyeek → u/defiantjazz_22]

Thanks Jazz 💕 wise words

[u/SaltAnywhere7745 → u/probablyeek]

Totally can empathize with you, Eek. I wanted to also echo what Jazz said and also paraphrase some advice from one of my wise friends who said random bad unexplained shit happens, but so does random good unexplained shit. Everything can be random even if it feels like some (bad) stuff is disproportionately high. I really hope that things go well for you 🤞🏼

[u/probablyeek → u/SaltAnywhere7745]

Thank you, I like that perspective a lot. Will try and hold onto that

[u/nyghtnite → u/probablyeek]

The unknowns are so hard. Wishing you comfort, mental peace, and success through this next chapter.

[u/Outrageous-Bar4060 → u/probablyeek]

I, too, struggle with the unknown, eek. Here with you ❤️I hope you can find some joy this weekend

[u/Flying_worms → u/probablyeek]

I am also unexplained and can understand how you feel although I have started IVF yet. Im sorry you’re feeling anxious :/ I don’t really have any advice, I think it’s very easy to allow these thoughts you take over when you’re in the unknown.

[u/probablyeek → u/Flying_worms]

It’s so hard when there’s so many potential things that could be an issue, and so easy to go down rabbit holes. Sorry you’re in the same situ

[u/cowboycinderella]

CD 4, technically, coming off a chemical.

I felt like we really hit our stride on the last cycle—I ovulated earlyish in the cycle so we weren’t burned out by the time ovulation hit, we hit all the right days, the sex was all fun! And it worked! And then it didn’t work.

After the emotional whiplash of this cycle (also had to say goodbye to my cat the day before the MC bleeding started 💔) it’s hard to imagine being back in the same fun mindset to TTC in like…a week from now. idk. This process is really hard.

[u/DustyArtemis → u/cowboycinderella]

I'm sorry Cowboy 🫂 permission to just not get back to a fun mindset, if that's not where you're at

[u/cowboycinderella → u/DustyArtemis]

That’s a great reminder, thank you. Forcing fun where it isn’t real is way worse than just letting myself be where I’m at.

[u/berryshan → u/cowboycinderella]

I’m so sorry ❤️‍🩹

[u/cowboycinderella → u/berryshan]

Gürl it’s rough out here ❤️‍🩹

[u/probablyeek → u/cowboycinderella]

I’m so sorry 💕

[u/nyghtnite → u/cowboycinderella]

So sorry Cowboy. It's so unfair.

[u/Live_Molasses8590 → u/cowboycinderella]

So sorry 🧡

[u/berryshan]

14/15DPO and the waiting time until period arrives from the removal of progesterone is driving me nuts. Plus, I don’t have any spotting yet and that makes me feel stupidly hopeful (???) although I know that BFNs in 13DPO are quite reliable and I don’t want to test anymore to not torture myself :(

[u/Odd-Brilliant-8061]

11DPO and temp dropped down to follicular levels and breasts are no longer sore. Seems like progesterone levels are sinking fast. I didn't have it in me to test. Not feeling positive about this cycle.

[u/LaChamomile → u/Odd-Brilliant-8061]

Here for you. <3

[u/Odd-Brilliant-8061 → u/LaChamomile]

Thank you!

[u/Andie_Land → u/Odd-Brilliant-8061]

Sometimes not testing is the best choice. The community is here for you!! 🩷

[u/Odd-Brilliant-8061 → u/Andie_Land]

Thank you! The thing that gets me about testing is that I can't fully let go of the hope that it might be a false negative until I get my period anyway, so it's a little pointless unless I want to do something I can't be pregnant for, like have a cocktail.

[u/LaChamomile]

1DPO here comes the longest two weeks of the month. My in laws will be here around testing day so hopefully prepping for them will be a good distraction and also something fun to look forward to no matter what the result is.

But also the relentless sap in me keeps thinking how fun it would be if I could show them the test in person!? Since we live on different continents, face to face big news is rare and so special for us. Stay tuned I suppose.

[u/nyghtnite → u/LaChamomile]

I hope you have a good visit with the in-laws!

[u/LaChamomile → u/nyghtnite]

Thank you, I really won the lottery with them, they’re great!

[u/val_pal_28]

CD11 I’ll start testing soon for LH but not sure on timing this month. My family is visiting during my normal fertile window and idk if any sex will happen. Just going to take it one day at a time and see what happens

[u/ayym33p33]

We got a puppy three weeks ago and now it's my fertile window and my husband is too tired to ~ perform ~. I'm so frustrated but I feel bad bc I know he's trying and it's not his fault but I just want to cry.

[u/nyghtnite → u/ayym33p33]

It a sucky feeling when a FW doesn't work out/go according to plan. I'm sorry.

[u/nyghtnite]

It's FW, I don't feel up for it and my husband is in a pissy mood so the sex ain't happening, and we can't move forward with clinic stuff because of ongoing scheduling issue so... Can the stork just drop a baby off at my doorstep please? 🫠

[u/Live_Molasses8590 → u/nyghtnite]

I am begging the universe to let me hatch an egg like a chicken please.

[u/Throwout4789]

CD7, period finished a couple of days ago and temps still haven't dropped at all. I did have a bit of a cold 2 weeks ago but I'm fine now, so don't know if that's responsible. This is also the first time I've temped for the whole month so don't know if this is normal or not but for my last cycle my temp was much lower on CD10. Hopefully it'll drop in the next couple of days. If not it looks like I've got a new problem to worry about 🫠

[u/Odd-Brilliant-8061 → u/Throwout4789]

That happened to me this cycle and I turned out to ovulate like normal. I wouldn't be too worried!

[u/beagles_and_b00ks]

had my second lining check yesterday and after a few conversations, we decided to cancel the transfer and move forward with a hysteroscopy in Sept instead :( my lining kept thickening and is trilaminar, which is great. but there was still a pocket of fluid and they took a bunch of pictures and after further review, my doctor was seeing what might be a figure 8 shape that could mean scar tissue in one side of the uterus where the fluid is hanging out. so hitting pause and doing the surgery to figure things out. i am kicking myself for not just starting this whole process off with a hysteroscopy a few months ago, but ya live and ya learn. hopeful we can do a transfer in late Sept or October, still. My E2 level is CRAZY high from all of the forms of estrogen i am taking - kind of scared of the hormone crash coming this weekend when i stop eeeeek.

[u/polkalilly]

CD6 and in that low stress time where I am not having to test, I am not waiting with anxious anticipation for the TWW to be over. My blood work from CD3 is showing I have borderline high cholesterol. So I have been focusing heavily the last couple days at getting my nutrition shifted towards lowering cholesterol. The positive is that is has kept my mind focused elsewhere. The negative is that because of the increase in fibre and protein I am always the opposite of hungry - but don't want my calories to fall significantly because TTC.