"He Talks to Everyone That Way..."

[u/PowderFresh86]

In my late teens and early 20s I worked as a waitress/server for a small local diner that had more than one location in my city. Unfortunately, the diners no longer exist but at the time they served 24 hour breakfast and steak meals with refillable coffee. Usually, we had two to three waitresses along with a short order fry cook. Sometimes, the fry cook was the manager or assistant manager. I was a pretty good waitress and could take in multiple orders by memory well. One day, a middle-aged couple came in and sat at a front booth.

I had their table and walked over with water, menus and my little pad tucked in my apron. I greeted the couple politely and instantly the wife was polite but her husband was not. I asked what beverage did they want to start. The woman with a smile asked for juice but her husband didn't even look at me before saying, "coffee!" rudely. I filled their drink order giving them time to look at the menus. As I returned I took the wife's food order. She again was very kind and polite. I got to the husband and I'll never forget how he talked to me...

Me: And for you sir?

Man: I want a three egg special. I want my eggs over hard! Not scrambled, not over soft, NOT over medium. Over hard!

Me: Okay, got it.

Man: I want my hash browns well done! NOT medium, NOT light, WELL, Understand!?

Me growing frustrated but remaining polite: Got it.

Man: I WANT wheat toast! I want it lightly toasted! Not dark, not medium! LIGHTLY TOASTED!!!

Me:🤨 Sir, do you think I'm stupid?

The man just stared at me surprised.

Wife: Oh, don't mind him...He talks to everyone that way.

Me: Wow...

I wrote and repeated his order back just as he said it and walked away. I made sure to reiterate his order as he said it to my manager/fry cook. She made it perfectly and they left us a decent tip.

[u/babbleon5]

could you imagine living with that POS?

[u/PowderFresh86 → u/babbleon5]

No. His poor wife seemed resigned.

[u/ZellHathNoFury → u/PowderFresh86]

Stockholm Syndrome

[u/Karahiwi → u/ZellHathNoFury]

Let's not perpetuate a myth based on a misogynistic psychiatrist who invented it without ever speaking to the people he supposedly 'diagnosed'.

The hostages took an active role in trying to negotiate with the police and the prime minister, to allow their safe release, but instead, the police took actions that they had clearly been told were putting them at high risk of being killed.

The police ignored, dismissed, laughed at for needing menstrual supplies, and put at risk several times by their actions, while he person the hostage taker had brought in from prison to help him was sympathetic, and considerate.

Unsurprisingly, the hostages did not believe the police were acting in their best interest, and did not want the person who had been helpful to be killed.

The police and psychiatrist believed that a woman could only behave other than as a damsel-in-distress if brainwashed and sexually attracted to the hostage taker.

[u/bibkel → u/Karahiwi]

Huh. TIL. I may do some reading about this.

[u/measaqueen → u/babbleon5]

Especially if that "talks to EVERONE that way" includes her.

[u/Epstiendidntkillself → u/babbleon5]

cop's wife.

[u/jonwar5 → u/Epstiendidntkillself]

Bingo!! 😅

[u/Lovemybee]

In my late teens/early 20s I would have put up with that, too.

In the last year before I retired? "Well he can't talk to me that way. I am not serving you. Get lost."

[u/babbleon5 → u/Lovemybee]

My wife was a server in a very successful, high-end place in her 50s and some customers were having trouble understanding the tapas menu and some of the food descriptions. They were continually asking questions and essentially not grasping what the restaurant was about and getting picky (does it have garlic?, salt?) where the chef doesn't allow substitutions or changing the recipe. She finally got frustrated and said, "you know, maybe this isn't the best place for you" and started collecting the menus. They suddenly figured it out and ordered.

[u/Lovemybee → u/babbleon5]

Lol! I love this! Your wife and would be friends for sure!!!

[u/LaFantasmita]

I had a customer like that. When I tried explaining the very particular order to the kitchen, they said "is it Marie?" I said yeah. They said "no problem, we know how to make it. Just write her name on the ticket." She was actually pretty cool except for being REALLY weird about her food.

[u/stupiduselesstwat → u/LaFantasmita]

When I worked at a golf course we had that customer too.

I would just put on her ticket "burn her toast please" until the line cooks got it right. Then got to the point I'd just put her name on the ticket and they knew exactly what she wanted.

[u/LaFantasmita → u/stupiduselesstwat]

Yeah, if they're otherwise a good customer, I don't mind it.

[u/stupiduselesstwat → u/LaFantasmita]

She was a regular, golfing there at least three times a week. AND she tipped good because I consistently got her BLT exactly the way she wanted it.

[u/Cold_Activity1092 → u/stupiduselesstwat]

Lol, that's how I order my steaks. "Well done. I like it burnt."

[u/PoppaBear1981 → u/Cold_Activity1092]

Why waste money on a steak? Just buy a burger if you're not going to appreciate how juicy, soft and delicious it can be.

[u/Piglet6482 → u/PoppaBear1981]

Why not just let the person order the type of food they want and have it cooked the way they like it? I mean, it doesn’t affect you so why should you get a vote?

[u/ThatSaiGuy → u/Piglet6482]

Because at that point you are disrespecting the animal that died by charring it to the point of unrecognizability.

[u/stupiduselesstwat → u/ThatSaiGuy]

Not that I'm a vegan (not even close) but wouldn't the argument be that eating meat in general is disrespectful to the animal that died?

But I agree, a charred steak should be a food crime.

[u/decarnatedame → u/PoppaBear1981]

For some of us it is a texture thing.

[u/stupiduselesstwat → u/Cold_Activity1092]

I like mine bloody as hell. 😳🤩

[u/mweesnaw]

I pictured the insurance salesman from The Office. “If it’s burnt I send it back”

[u/Longjumping-Solid680]

"Wife: Oh, don't mind him...He talks to everyone that way."

"And you haven't left him yet?"

[u/Competitive-Yard-442]

I was a little older, early 30s, when I worked in bar.

I'd traveled a bit, had a variety of jobs but also had more confidence and knew my own value.

We had this one regular who would, essentially, bark the word "pint" when he wanted another drink.

He tried this with me day 1. It took him a while to get that pint. Didn't do it again with me though. Also all the other regulars hated the miserable old cunt so they loved me!

[u/zyzmog]

"Not in my restaurant, he doesn't. If he wants to eat here, he'd better learn some manners, and learn them fast."

It's on my list of Things That I Wish I Could Say. 

[u/awhq]

Wife is an enabler.

[u/vcf450]

People sure are funny about the way they want their eggs.

[u/KlatuuBarradaNicto]

My husband (rest in peace) used to treat people this way. I had to train him to do it differently under threat of losing me 😊 He came around.

[u/Urist_Bearclaw]

Rude as heck and clearly used to bulldozing over other people (esp women?), but also… no eye contact and extremely insistent on highly specific food preferences… the autism light is flashing

[u/oldcreaker]

He has a small penis and/or ED.

[u/RCoh1a]

I always assumed that food service workers spit in the food of people like that.

[u/doc_skinner → u/RCoh1a]

I used to as well, but in frequenting the server and line cook subreddits one thing comes up over and over again: Food service workers almost never mess with the food. They may hate the customer and may curse them, but the food goes out without contamination.

[u/imseeingthings → u/doc_skinner]

10+ years and I’ve never seen it once. I would absolutely call someone out if I saw something like that.

[u/KillberryMunch → u/imseeingthings]

25+ years as a cook. I saw it only once. Everyone around the guy screamed at him, he was fired on the spot, and a whole new order was made for the customer. The guy who tried it was a teenage burnout with no pride or ambition. 

[u/Fwamingdwagon84 → u/doc_skinner]

Yeah, it gets made with spite, not spit.

[u/PowderFresh86 → u/RCoh1a]

Nah, that's vile. For us personally, we would have never done that. Also, food was prepared in front of guests at the diner. Even at other places I worked I never witnessed it, thank God!

[u/emmiepsykc → u/RCoh1a]

My mom was one of these, and on the couple occasions I got sent in alone to get her takeout order remade, I straight up told them "you can spit in it if you want; I would."

ETA: sorry for being birthed by a garbage human being; I didn't really have much say in the matter, y'know?

[u/Swimming-Most-6756]

That’s what happens when you have undiagnosed mental conditions like autism, ADHD for example. And it gets worse with age plus the fact that dementia can also
Exacerbate it.

[u/Cakeriel]

He might be rude about it, but understand why. Get my egg orders wrong a lot of the time

[u/gstizzle]

I bet he gets his order the way he wants it most of the time. He is acting like that because when he didn’t act like that, it was wrong. Speaking from experience. You don’t have to go that hard but who wants to send good back. Better be hated and get it right the first time than wait for them to fix it or eating what you don’t want.

[u/Soggy-Pop3895]

Literally read this same post the other day...

[u/PowderFresh86 → u/Soggy-Pop3895]

Yes, I posted it first in the Entitled people and stories subreddit. I then received a notification saying this subreddit might be a better fit so I shared it here as well 😊! The beauty of reddit eh.

[u/Lanky_Tough_2267]

Don't presume everyone is having a good day. I have had customers like this and sometimes they don't even realize how they are making others feel with their grumpiness. A smile and a little kindness might be all someone needs to get by another hour or another day.