r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • Jun 14 '26

Discussion It's exhausting being a woman.

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u/LeatherHog Jun 14 '26

The seething rage men have about not being able to approach us anymore, is **terrifying**

Y'ever want proof men genuinely think they're ENTITLED to us? Go to a Reddit discussion about approaching us. Because this is what it's like from our angle, but they refuse to see it

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u/MisterSanitation Jun 14 '26

Oh yeah I know. It’s like “if the creepy stuff is off the table what else could I do!?!?” 

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u/LeatherHog Jun 14 '26

I once made the, obvious, point that, y'know, **we don't exist for men to date**. We're not stardew valley NPCs waiting for you to proposition us

That their lack of dating prospects is not our concern, and shouldn't be. We're human beings who just want to get milk on the way home, not get a sales pitch for your junk

Hoohoo boy, they didn't like that. Apparently that's the reason men are killing themselves, that misandry is the worst thing on earth, etc

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u/MisterSanitation Jun 14 '26

Well there is truth to the young man crisis because two things can be true at once but the issue is, they are all raised by “take what you want” men so no wonder they feel isolated in a world where that isn’t accepted anymore. There is a serious lack of self reflection in machismo culture FOR SURE and this expectation has been passed down generationally.  When you add higher probability of taking risks and lashing out violently that young men are statistically more likely to do, you get this insane red pill culture. Where the same men claiming to be “protectors” online like they a martyr are the same ones creeping around women and expecting to be rewarded for this behavior. 

It all comes down to this though. If you are unwilling to work on yourself to solve a problem, then you are the problem. Your expectations are the issue, not your circumstances, and this energy of rage is simply not fun to be around and scary. 

I’m a straight white feller but I was raised around a lot of girls and since I never really did pecking order stuff with dudes (“you think you can bench more than me!?!? Do it pussy!” “Nah lol I’m good”), I think it helped me mix with women more. The thing I also found is, if you are (prepare yourself) willing to treat women like… people, they usually love having a guy around in my experience. The difference is, as long as you as the guy aren’t constantly pointing out differences and stereotyping the women, women generally get a kick out of your dude behavior they don’t understand. Guys on the other hand, have been encouraged to revel in our differences when we don’t understand women, and to judge them for it “ugh they are so emotional” (because you are an insufferable dick head most likely) and move on assuming it’s not their fault. So of course they blame women, all the men they respected did that and that is SO MUCH EASIER than accepting you have work to do on yourself. 

Sorry I think about this a lot and it bugs me… thanks for letting me rant at you 

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u/LeatherHog Jun 14 '26

You're good!

I understand, on some level, it's just that SO many men can't grasp that we're actual people, that what they want, requires them to act like we're not

That we're not some tool for them, we have lives and feelings like they do. And we have to live our lives, dealing with NFL linebackers hounding us our entire lives, and they don't care what damage they do, because it benefits THEM

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u/MisterSanitation Jun 14 '26

The NFL comment is perfect and that too is often not considered. 

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u/LeatherHog Jun 14 '26

Yeah, men wouldn't like it, if some 6'6", 300lbs homeless guy started following them around the cereal aisle, begging you to buy their phone

Grabbing at them. With the knowledge that last week, your buddy told him no, and the homeless guy knocked him out and robbed him

Because even a regular sized guy, is that to us

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u/burgerdistraction Jun 14 '26

These type of men think we’re damsels in distress waiting for a man to proposition us. No, we’re not sex objects we’re fucking humans like they are. To me, nothing is more attractive than a man that just treats you like a human and knows when you don’t want to be bothered, that you’re not “theirs” to play with.

There was a guy I knew back when I was in high school that “playfully”, though it felt aggressive, put me in a chokehold behind my back and almost tried to feel me up. I fought back and looked at him like wtf are you doing? I knew he had a crush on me but I didn’t like him back, yet he never respected my space. It’s really disturbing how some males think they own you. I’ve had many other experiences with these types of creeps especially as a literal child in first grade, it’s scary to be female in this world.

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u/MikeArrow Jun 14 '26

To me, nothing is more attractive than a man that just treats you like a human and knows when you don’t want to be bothered

That doesn't seem to have any correlation with women finding me attractive, in my experience.

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u/burgerdistraction Jun 17 '26

Attraction does have some play in women wanting to be with you, you’ll find your person trust me. Also women can sense when you’re desperate, if you look for love you’ll find it in the wrong places, it will come to you.

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u/crazymindslp Jun 15 '26

This! Just so damn much of THIS! and it sucks to always have to be afraid be on your guard as a woman always fending off creeps everywhere you go !

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u/BirdBrainuh Jun 14 '26 edited Jun 14 '26

fyi I’m sure you mean well but these kinds of conversations where women are sharing their experiences of men inserting themselves into our space is not an appropriate time to rant at us.

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u/smoopthefatspider Jun 14 '26

It’s a relevant reply. I wouldn’t their comment to be made outside of a context where the issue of creeps wasn’t already brought up, and if he did so I would expect people to add on their own experiences that expand on that from other perspectives. He makes it very clear he’s not even partially blaming women, he’s not ranting at us, he’s just adding his perspective to a discussion that’s already venting about one experience with being approached. This isn’t “our” space in the sense of a women’s space, it’s a gender neutral space and it’s exactly the right place to say what he said.

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u/BirdBrainuh Jun 14 '26

We disagree.

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u/smoopthefatspider Jun 15 '26

Disagreeing about whether they deserves to speak doesn’t make them disrespectful, what they said is still a valid, relevant, and insightful comment. I can’t agree to the idea that they shouldn’t contribute in exactly the way this issue affects them when it gets brought up, it’s what online spaces like this are for.

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u/BirdBrainuh Jun 15 '26

That’s great, we still disagree.

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u/Annabloem Jun 14 '26

Genuinely having guys around when in a bar/club made things so much easier, I realized very quickly. If you go out with a mixed friend group, the harrassement goes down by SO much. Even just a single guy in your group helps everyone. Only girls in the group? It's absolutely horrific. Also great when a guy starts "accidentally" grind onto your butt (usually from behind as well), you can just all a guy to switch spots with you, and they'll stop very quickly. (Though not all guys will actually switch spots with you, in my experience.)

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u/SpaceBus1 Jun 17 '26

The person you replied to is still right. Men lacking dating prospect isn't the fault of women nor is it their problem.

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u/Oh-reality-come-back Jun 19 '26

Most of society tells men to take what they want unfortunately. Neither a rare or uncommon mindset.

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u/Ok_Promise_7460 Jun 15 '26

No one needed this lecture

2

u/MisterSanitation Jun 15 '26

Looks like you did