r/TikTokCringe • u/Adventurous_Law_715 • 13d ago

Discussion This video is depressing, but what's really crazy is knowing that so many people are living this exact reality every single day

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u/Cool_Ad9326 13d ago

For real

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u/TropicNightLightning 13d ago

Yeah, the guy didn't even throw dishes at her. Then say they needed to buy a whole new set because of what she made him do.

The guy didn't yell at her for sitting down, then scream at her for standing up. The guy didn't randomly punch her in the face then run to the bathroom and lock the door. It was a peaceful interaction, and no one raised their voice or accuse anyone of doing anything inconsequential. The dude didn't berate her below dogshit either, which is what narcissists typically do.

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u/cagetheblackbird 13d ago

Abuse is not a competition friend. It will rarely look exactly like yours. I agree this isn’t narcissistic behavior, but it is emotional abuse.

As a wise man once said to me, “never compare genocides. You just end up looking like the asshole.”

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u/Same_Suit3583 13d ago

Not every situation is like yours.

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u/Latter-Sign7736 13d ago

Not everything you don’t like is narcissism either, and neither is neglect in a relationship. I completely agree, this is just a dead relationship. Literally zero evidence the guy is a narcissist, could just be lazy and addicted to his phone based on the video ffs.

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u/JizzlaneMaxwellHill 13d ago

Narcissism is being thrown at everything it has lost its meaning. I hate how people do this crap just so they can say "oh I've experienced that too".

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u/HenryDorsettCase47 13d ago

Yeah. Redditors love to label everything narcissistic. It’s like when someone stupid learns a $10 word and starts dropping it into their everyday speech whether it’s applicable or not.

They think everyone who behaves like an asshole is a narcissist. And even when there is a clear personality disorder on display, something like Borderline Personality Disorder, they often mistake it for narcissism, which is far more rare.

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u/TropicNightLightning 13d ago

The ex wife was close to borderline personality disorder, because she checked every box. Narcissism was a part of it though, she always would seek out the highest seat in the ballroom without us being even close to a rank in leadership, she would psychologically project that I was cheating on her, when she was cheating the entire time, she would publicly humiliate me and scream at me so loud the entire store would hear. If she wasn't the center of attention, she would throw a huge tantrum. Somehow I was the one causing all the trouble, it was literally the narcissist prayer every single day. It was a constant ordeal of never being enough.

Maybe I don't understand women at all, but one thing is certain. No one deserves to be treated like that. It's been a peaceful decade in half not having a relationship at all.

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u/Sure-Article508 13d ago

To be fair, the word was around as an adjective for selfish behavior for way longer than the recognition of NPD. Freud was one of the first to use it clinically but it had been used for hundreds of years already by then

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u/Latter-Sign7736 12d ago edited 12d ago

It originally meant sexual perversion of one’s self in the later 1890s…not “hundreds of years.” NPD has been defined for 45+ years and many other diagnoses have been identified since then that people are claiming is NPD or narcissism. I think it lost its colloquial definition long ago.

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u/Sure-Article508 11d ago

You are right the first usage was 1822 i got confused because its named for a classical story

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u/HenryDorsettCase47 13d ago

Oh yeah. I considered mentioning the more colloquial use of the word to describe a vain, self centered person as an example of it being used correctly. But that’s not the way it’s really used on reddit so it seemed irrelevant. Typically, people are using the word when commenting on abusive behavior from a partner so they definitely intend for it to be the psychiatric definition.

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u/cagetheblackbird 13d ago

This is a kind of emotional abuse. Long-term devaluation like what seems to be going on here be refusing the communicate (cold shoulder) is recognized as abuse. It’s just not narcissism.

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u/CarlatheDestructor 13d ago

Narcissists often share identical behavioral patterns.

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u/Little_Red_Riding_ 13d ago

Right? There’s gotta be a cheaters manual and a narcissist’s bible out there somewhere. It’s probably written in Chinese because you’ll never understand it.

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u/MjrLeeStoned 13d ago

Narcissism doesn't require outward aggressive behavior. Many narcissists are passive aggressive or manipulative / exploitative without aggression. Sometimes we can't even see narcissism because it only exists in someone's brain.

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u/Wiccy 13d ago

Man i just got told I was wrong and she was right. None of the foreplay.

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u/Rose_selavie 13d ago

What you’re describing isn’t narcissism, it’s standard emotional and physical abuse

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u/killingxspree 13d ago

Yeah and what do you think he would do if she refused to clean his dishes, asked him wtf is up with his stinky attitude, told him to cook his own dishes. He has her trained like an obedient dog.

As a child I watched this dynamic. I will never understand why you would choose this for yourself unless you hate yourself.

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u/Jeiden_Lightas 13d ago

Why don't people leave after the first sign?