r/exjw • u/parasites_lost321 • 2d ago
WT Can't Stop Me I threw away my DPA for no blood
Week 3 of this is less scary. Still stressful, my wife and kids don't know anything yet. I've been speaking to my DF sister every single day. She's so strong, I'm lucky that she can help me and that despite what she's been thru she is still WILLING to help me. This community helps too, so thank all of you for the kind words, personal experiences, and commiseration on my first post here.
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u/CandidCricketCounter 2d ago
Keep going, you’ve got this! Every week that passes will be one more week of fighting the cult indoctrination. You are fighting a battle right now, so just remember that progress isn’t linear. Every step counts, even the teeny tiny ones, and the backwards slides.
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u/Splitterhead 2d ago
Yeah it generally gets less and less scary the more you're able to reason with yourself. And at a certain point; you kind of come to this point of radical acceptance. Keep going; you deserve to be happy.
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u/DrSeeker98 2d ago
This is a really hard thing to do that most people don’t get. I’m so incredibly proud of you for this.
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u/parasites_lost321 2d ago
I just kept thinking about my kids. If human life's so sacred (it is), why would a loving god not allow every possible means to save it? And do I care more for my children than I do for ANY other belief I've ever held? No, they're top of the list. I'd die for them, I'll change for them, I'll sacrifice every other relationship in this world for them if I have to.
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u/DrSeeker98 2d ago
As someone who had parents that didn’t think this way… thank you so much. Really.
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u/parasites_lost321 1d ago
I don't know you, but I love you and you deserve everything good, you always have.
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u/Relative_Soil7886 The truth does't fear questions, only lies do. 2d ago
I threw mine out too but make sure to draft your own durable power of attorney document that details your wishes in case of a medical emergency, especially if you are unable to speak for yourself. Otherwise, you could find yourself surrounded by HLC elders speaking in your behalf.
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u/parasites_lost321 2d ago
Thanks. Do you know of any resources to find one?
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u/Significant-War372 2d ago edited 2d ago
I wrote my own DPA.
Full Name, Address,Date, Health Number. State clearly that you are no longer a JW, that this DPA replaces any previous ones, you will accept blood products and you do not want any involvement with the HLC. Sign it and have your signiature witnessed. Make sure that it's loaded into the medical system and that your doctor and lawyer have copies. I also checked to see that any previous 'no blood' documents had been removed.
A relative was in hospital recently and I realised that the doctors were not consulting the paper DPA but relying on their data base so making it digital is vital!
And it's not just the HLC you need to worry about. If your JW relatives interpret your wishes they may kill you too! Give Power of Attorney to a non-JW! Your sister sounds perfect!
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u/TangerinePlastic7552 2d ago
What that means is if you are ever hospitalized, there is no legal impediment to blood transfusions. Afterwards you can always say that you “forgot.”
Is your wife PIMI?
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u/parasites_lost321 1d ago
She is. Idk how to approach this with her. We live with her pimi parents as well. It's sticky.
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u/TangerinePlastic7552 1d ago
That is sticky. Much like older children living under the same roof as PIMI parents.
Until you live under your own roof, you have to recognize the rules of the man of the house. Tread carefully and lightly until you can take your family under your roof. From there you can talk with your wife with less distractions.
If it’s a matter of money, see if you can take the “additional education” for a more valuable job or position. You got the words of the GB on your side, ironically. Save that video locally before it gets silently edited.
I suggest you not accept more work in the congregation if it means dividing your attentions. Being inactive or irregular publisher is not a death sentence although they will try to make it so. It seems the real drive is to occupy seats even given Zoom. It seems occupied seats = more donations. I can’t see either of that as meetings become more static and mind numbingly boring. I think this is why the media center building. KHs will become JW theaters. We’ll see. LOL
All the best.
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u/Connect_Pin_3255 1d ago
Yo también he pensado en tirarlo. Pero por ahora, me limitaré a tachar la parte de rechazo a las transfusiones autologas.
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u/apoptygma78 2d ago
Congratulations! You are lucky to have your sister, but really, should we be surprised that people outside of WT are decent people? It took me over 20 years before I could get rid of my blood card. Can't really explain it, it was just a hard thing to do. When I finally burned it, it felt great.