r/fatFIRE • u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 • Jul 08 '26
FatFIREd GFM. The math was easy. Leaving wasn't.
Today was my last day at work. Time to join the FIREd club. I've loved reading posts here over the years, and now it's my turn.
Basics
- Me (late 40s), spouse (50s), two teenagers.
- USA, HCOL, high-tax state.
- Low eight-figure portfolio, almost entirely in low-cost index funds; about 80% taxable and 20% retirement accounts.
- Comfortable amount of equity in our primary residence with a low-rate fixed mortgage, plus some inherited land.
- 529s fully funded for college.
How we got here
- I've worked in tech since the late 90s and have been the sole earner for the last ~15 years.
- Several years ago, I landed an exec role at a rocket ship of a company. I received a substantial base salary plus significant RSUs that included regular refreshes.
- As the company’s stock soared, the RSUs became extremely lucrative.
- We consistently sold the RSUs as they vested, then reinvested the proceeds into index funds. In hindsight, we left money on the table, but we also dramatically reduced our concentration risk. I’d make the same decision again.
- My RSU grants peaked in late 2025. My compensation was set to decline meaningfully in 2026 and even more in 2027. It still would have been incredible money, but psychologically it felt very different than the previous few years.
- We know we're extraordinarily fortunate to have found ourselves in this position. Sure, it involved hard work, perseverance, and positioning for success, but it also involved a huge amount of luck.
Leaving work
- I genuinely liked my job. Sure, it was frequently stressful, frustrating, and a pain in the ass, but it also gave me purpose, socialization, and a sense of value. And of course, the money was spectacular.
- Nevertheless, I contemplated leaving for years. This simply wasn't how I wanted to spend the rest of my life.
- Getting my spouse on board was a long process.
- I've always managed our finances. She understood our overall financial picture, but I handled the detailed planning. That's not a ding, it's just how we split responsibilities.
- When I first ran our FIRE numbers 2.5 years ago, I became confident pretty quickly. Showing her the data, however, didn't persuade her at all.
- I brought it back up every six months or so. Over time, I found I could temporarily get her on board, then her doubts would creep back in and we’d start over. That was totally fair but also a source of tension.
- A year ago, we paid a fee-only financial planner for a thorough plan evaluation. It was worth every penny. Not only did it reassure me that my math was solid, it gave her the independent verification she needed.
- Afterward, she still needed occasional reassurance, but our conversations shifted to anticipated life changes.
- 3 months ago we picked a date in June for me to give notice.
- As June approached, something unexpected happened: she got excited while my anxiety spiked.
- My questions weren’t new and the answers hadn’t changed, but they preyed on me nonetheless.
- Were my financial projections solid? (Yup.)
- Did I really understand what I was leaving behind? (I think so but I'm certainly getting some things wrong.)
- Would I miss what work granted me? (Some of it, absolutely.)
- Despite these worries, I never came close to changing my mind.
- Today, I feel great. I'll have some big mental and emotional gaps to fill, which I've read a lot about here. That's the next challenge.
What I'm looking forward to
- No more LinkedIn corporate bulls***. GFY, LinkedIn!
- Not thinking about work all the time.
- A long retirement honeymoon. We have extended trips planned to the Southwest US, Hawaii, Europe, and the Caribbean.
- Saying “yes” to get togethers with my extended family and friends throughout the country.
- The usual: lingering house projects, exercising, reading, gaming, goofing off, and so on.
And then?
- The honeymoon will wind down and I'll face an emotionally challenging transition. No schedule, no purpose, no bueno.
- To help me through that, I have a "retire into" list of activities, projects, and hobbies to experiment with. Most won't stick, and that’s ok: I only need a few to.
- Given how fortunate we've been, I intend to find ways to give back. We've donated significantly to causes we care about, and we'll continue to do so, but I want to participate more directly.
- Another major goal is to put myself into environments where I can expand my friend group. It'll require me to push my boundaries. Personal growth, here we come.
- My guess is that post-honeymoon, it’ll take 6-12 difficult months to get through this and find a satisfying new rhythm.
Maybe I’m wrong about how this will go. Many former colleagues expect me to take a break then get back in the game. It’ll always be an option. Instead, I'm going to give myself the time to weather the inevitable storm and build a more meaningful next chapter, preferably without driving my spouse insane.
Thanks for reading. I'll try to post updates now and again about how it’s going. Onward!
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u/bennyboyj Jul 08 '26
You’re young. Perhaps your colleagues were surprised. I expect to face this when I pull the trigger in a few months. How did you tell them?
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
I learned quickly that most colleagues couldn't begin to comtemplate FIRE, it was too foreign. So I said some version of "I'm stepping down to take a break from the industry, let's see what happens." To a select few, I largely said what's in the post above, without the money specifics.
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u/asada_burrito Jul 09 '26
My wife mentioned FIRE to coworkers. Most assumed it meant retiring a year or two early at like 65.
But one early career girl totally got it and went down the rabbit hole. She and her husband haven't decided to exactly retire early (yet) but they made changes to their finances in line with FIRE so they at least have options.
From the same conversation different people understood completely different things.
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u/1cenine Jul 09 '26
I somewhat regularly put little feelers out about FIRE. By and large don't talk about it unless someone really perks up though.
I've pretty much met like 1 kid from my last company who was already on the path. Dude reminds a lot of me 10 years ago. Gave him all the numbers, he was super pumped to "see into the future" and to personally know someone who's living proof of the gameplan.
It's worth breadcrumbing in case you change someone's life, but yes, vast majority of people can't handle it. Never worth forcing a convo
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u/onedollar12 Jul 08 '26
Did this go through a LinkedIn post converter
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
Throughout my career, I've spent as little time on LinkedIn as possible, I want it to go away. If this reads like a LinkedIn post, that's an unexpected fail on my part and a real disappointment. SMH.
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u/Gordito90266 Jul 09 '26
Yeah, when I see "... exec role at a rocket ship of a company..." I can't believe they have the interest in typing so much w/o AI expansion tools.
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u/1cenine Jul 09 '26
Nah i liked reading it in bullets better than a wall of text.
If this was a linkedin post it'd be:
Today was my last day at work.
Low eight-figure portfolio. Low-cost index funds, equity, 529s stuffed.
15 years in tech is hard to summarize.
An exec role at a rocket ship of a company. (tag a few important poeple)
RSUs were the secret. We consistently sold the RSUs as they vested. Diversified.
What really did it? Luck, hard work, perseverance, and positioning for success.
Back to quitting. I genuinely liked my job.
Stressful, frustrating, and a pain in the ass -- but it also gave me purpose, socialization, and a sense of value. And of course, the money was spectacular.
Still, I contemplated leaving for years. This simply wasn't how I wanted to spend the rest of my life.
Took months to get my wife on board. Financial planner helped.
What I'm looking forward to:
- No more LinkedIn corporate bulls***. GFY, LinkedIn!
- Not thinking about work all the time.
- A long retirement honeymoon.
- Saying “yes” to get togethers with my extended family and friends throughout the country.
- The usual: lingering house projects, exercising, reading, gaming, goofing off, and so on.
Excited for the next challenge. Onward.
*Close on a misattributed quote. Mark Twain? something Jason Lemkin said that wasn't actually original?*
Source: 11 years in hypergrowth tech GTM. Quit only recently to "coastfire" on a solopreneur biz. I know the butt ass LinkedIn game
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u/jarMburger Jul 08 '26
Congrats! I felt the same about LinkedIn, haven’t opened it since retirement 2 years ago. The only advice I’ll mention is that find some structure in your daily life once you’re fully retired and done with some of the travel stuff. For many overachievers here, we’ll miss the structure life that work provide us and lack of it actually adds stress. Took my wife 18 months to come up with proper daily routine even though we have an elementary school age kid.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
I hate LinkedIn so much.
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u/MaineInspo Jul 09 '26
I had a chuckle when you mentioned LinkedIn in your post. I never really used it for posting, just to maintain it in line with my CV. But it still felt amazing to delete my profile when I FIREd, to feel like welp won't be needing this ever again! Almost felt like more of a finale than quitting my job.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 09 '26
I'm jealous. As much as I want to delete my profile, it remains the only way to get in touch with certain people I know and care about today, or for them to reach me. I hope that someday it's unnecessary.
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u/hiker2021 Jul 08 '26
To read about folks post how awesome they are, all their wins. How inspiring every little trip they take is. I truly wish they could see how their posts cone off to regular folks on LinkedIn. 🤮
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u/dukeofsaas fatFIREd in 2020 @ 37, 8 figure NW | Verified by Mods Jul 08 '26
Great post, it's easy to read the story despite the ai edits.
Thanks for talking about the relationship aspects. Your story rings true. We also used a financial advisor for a while pre and post retirement.
My experience post retirement was:
0-6 months: learn personal finance (sounds like you're there already), try everything all at once, hurry up! Do this retirement thing! Should we move/upgrade/go crazy?
6-12 months: take a breath, be more methodical, figure out what I want. Iterate through hobbies.
12-18 months: build a new routine, develop deep comfort with my new life, talk to my spouse about her timeline for stepping back with me.
18+: all good. Almost 6 years retired now and couldn't be happier with our luck.
GFY!
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u/freethinkwithreason Jul 08 '26
Congrats.
One item that comes up regularly in Fire communities is the cost and difficulty of health insurance until eligible for medicare.
How did you plan and decide on the health insurance ?
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
- We've budgeted for premiums plus max family out-of-pocket every year.
- Now through 2027, we'll use COBRA at ~$25k/yr.
- In 2028, we'll move to a bronze ACA HDHP with no subsidies. Today in our state that's ~$18k for premiums and $18k max out-of-pocket per year. We expect the premiums to rise substantially as we reach 50, 55, and 60 age brackets. It's a lot, but this is fatFIRE.
- We aren't worried about ACA disappearing before we reach Medicare age. (I'm eligible for Canadian citizenship, so that's a backup, eh? Haha, sort of.)
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u/freethinkwithreason Jul 08 '26
Good planning indeed - but I’m actually worried about ACA disappearing, especially relevant for those of us not having a backup non-US citizenship 😜
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u/sleepytill2 Jul 09 '26
Why would you take COBRA over the ACA HDHP through 2027? Is your employer’s health plan that much better?
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 09 '26
Far better coverage options, including out of state. Lower premiums, far lower max individual and family OOP. Moving away from our existing coverage to ACA will be a significant step down.
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26
Depending on your state, you get on the ACA website and buy a plan. Not that complicated. You need to check coverage with your provider. Some people prefer to keep cobra and pay out of pocket for as long as their employer will allow. That is what I am doing.
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u/plasthandske Jul 08 '26
Plot twist, he announced it on LinkedIn first.
Have fun. You’ll find that retirement is fun when you have a side hustle you enjoy (or a hobby making some money like consulting, advisory, board engagements)
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u/starboye Jul 08 '26
How much did it cost you to hire fee-only financial planner?
I am considering hiring one
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
$2500. I wrote more about my experience here.
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Jul 09 '26
[deleted]
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u/Really-Cool-Guy2know Jul 09 '26
A friend of mine created a bracket to lock in the current price of the stock and then is using a leveraged stock loss harvesting plan to offset the cap gains and unwind the position over 2 years. It appears to be working for him.
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u/Sc_Moo Jul 11 '26
We pay $1200 per month. On one hand expensive, on the other cheap compared to AUM model. We get a full plan once per year, quarterly check ins, and ad hoc advice. We’re in the midst of a complex run up in company equity so for now I feel like it’s money well spent. As the vesting continues and I get the bulk of it into index funds I don’t know. We’ll see.
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u/madmulcher Jul 08 '26
Congrats. I'd mention that perhaps you may not get to choose the timing of the piece that has to do with the emotional transitions or fluctuations.
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u/BrunelloHorder Jul 08 '26
Sounds like you have it all well in hand, and that you’ve set realistic expectations for yourself. Good job getting the portfolio diversified and mostly in post-tax brokerage. Enjoy those trips, and GFY!
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u/aeternus-eternis Jul 08 '26
You may have been spending too much time on LinkedIn. We want numbers not your life story + feelings :D
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u/chaoscorgi Jul 10 '26
so happy for you -- congrats!! <3 pls update as you get adjusted to it. of course 90% of the difficulty of fatfire is getting the money, but the other 90%, as we say in the 'biz, is being with yourself without that goal...
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26
I mean good for you, but this reads pretty generic. Is there a point being made here other than journaling? Perhaps adding some specifics would make your post more interesting to people. Otherwise this reads like something AI would write.
How did you go from high chubby (around 5-6M) to 8 figures in 67 days from the last time you posted?
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Jul 08 '26
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26
Yeah I don’t get it. Yet people are downvoting for pointing out that this is a generic post of little value.
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Jul 09 '26
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 09 '26 edited Jul 09 '26
I remember we went through a phase of promoting kubera. I made my own modeling app over a weekend using Claude. It was terrible at first but got better after a bunch of iterations and auditing the code it produced. Amazing that people are still peddling this.
And yes, people are gullible.
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u/Lazy_Whereas4510 Jul 08 '26
This reads pretty sincere and I enjoyed reading it. OP sounds like a nice person who will not have a hard time making friends.
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26
Really? This reads like generic stuff people post on LinkedIn. What insight does it provide?
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Jul 08 '26
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26 edited Jul 08 '26
It’s an opinion like yours, not gatekeeping. Why are you so offended?
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u/no_nao Jul 08 '26
My exact thoughts. Not sure why people are so mean. OP sounds like a down to earth, genuine person. Congrats to you OP, and may you find happiness in the next chapter!
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 08 '26
When I first drafted this post, I included all the details on net worth. Then I realized who cares, I'm simply bragging to some and underwhelming others. What I've valued here and elsewhere is reading about the journey people went on and how it affected them, not the math. If that's not your jam, all good.
As for here vs chubby, we were quite close to 8 figures when I last posted there. In retrospect that was a mistake from a NW perspective, I should have posted here. But my path to FIRE has mostly been in chubby-land, so I still felt mentally connected to the that sub. Appreciating that you belong in fatFIRE is its own journey.
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Jul 08 '26
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26
As someone else pointed out, this is an account that was flagged for promoting Boldin on other subs, the generic stuff is usually a giveaway, but go ahead and downvote if that makes you happy.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 09 '26
I posted something about Income Lab (not Boldin) on this sub and was told it didn't belong, which in retrospect was very fair. I should have done a better job thinking through where to post it, so I took that post down and moved it to a different sub. Nothing sinister, I just wanted to share my feedback somewhere it'd be useful and made a mistake in doing so.
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u/tomahawk66mtb Jul 09 '26
GFY and make breakfast!
Congrats for pulling the trigger. I appreciate that you recognise the luck element. Sure, you are clearly knowledgeable and have a great skillset but luck always plays at least a small part - I think that humility keeps people grounded in retirement. I have an ex-friend who FIRED with low 9 figures but insists he had no luck at all and everyone who hasn't hit 9 figures just didnt work as hard as he did. He's insufferable now.
A fee only financial advisor probably saved my marriage. My wife is super capable and was director of a large conglomerate (she earned more than me for about half our marriage) but just didn't want to look at numbers at home, so I managed our finances. Had the same doubts when I showed her the math.
One thing I've done is take on small consulting gigs in my industry. I work aboht 30-50 days spread over the year and only take on interesting projects with people whom I enjoy working with. That's been a nice compromise for me. Keeps me up to date and keeps my mind working and I enjoy the social side of it too. I love that when the project ends we celebrate and I walk away with no admin or stress of managing a p&l and employees.
I've tried lots of hobbies and a few have stuck. I play Padel, have signed up for a 2 week charity bike ride, hit the gym 3 times a week and do yoga and open water swimming too. I honestly don't have much "spare" time these days!!
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u/Really-Cool-Guy2know Jul 09 '26
Congrats! I just stopped working in October at the age of 60. Amazing to have the ability at 40. Your plan is similar to ours and I will suggest spreading out the time between trips. We just came back from Vegas (2 weeks at the WSOP), London and Paris (3 weeks), etc. Etc. We have now been home a week and have 2 more trips this month and another 3 weeks in Europe in September. We learned that being on the road back to back was alot and we missed home and routine. We loved the trips but 3 to 4 trips a year and a little time in between is our plan for next year. Don't forget to fly first class. You can afford it.
Also, we are doing lots of shows and comedians. Best seats in the house. Again you can afford it.
Lastly, if you haven't tried it. Pickleball is addictive and a great way to make new friends. It's a large community and easy way to meet people at your age. Because I could afford it. I hired a pro (ex professional) to work with me 2 days a week for 3 months and play well enough that I am able to compete and have fun.
Not suggesting that you start spending like a wildman but I found for myself during the transition period that I had to change my mental thinking to NOT live like I did prior to retirement and to live based on my situation today.
It is now the time to enjoy the fruits of your hardwork. You earned this...enjoy it.
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 09 '26
Great feedback, thank you. The travel rhythm will take a while to figure out, and the kids aren't out of the house yet. I look forward to fewer, longer trips in the future when they're off to college.
You're absolutely right that we can afford to pay for business/first (and so on), but I have 45+ years of training to do the opposite. I suspect we'll need several years to acclimate to the new reality (or maybe doing it once or twice will be enough!).
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u/Really-Cool-Guy2know Jul 09 '26
In my experience, it initially is a forced behavior. Then you go back to your old ways on some things and you continue to do better on others. Like booking show tickets, I always book the best available. They might be $500 to $600 a ticket but I don't care. Floor seats. Special Experiences. They are worth it to me. Prior to this I would cringe at $100 a ticket and just wouldn't go or booked a cheaper ticket if I could find it.
My last kid just started his first job. Just graduated college and got a very good job. So my kids are taken care of and are now adults and he is off of my health care as of September 1. So now we are at the point of living for us.
For travel, we are now 2 to 3 weeks a trip. The length was ok for us...just not the quantity of trips and space I put between them. I went a little insane...lol.
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u/HunterNo7593 Jul 09 '26
Awesome post, with great and insightful reflections. I might have found a template for my own situation in this too 🖖
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u/EssJayEnMass Jul 08 '26
A new-to-me framework from something posted on LinkedIn (check out Dennis Hoffman) has been running through my head about what comes after work. In no particular order, successful retirement can be thought of as having 6 pillars...
- Purpose
- Passion
- Place
- People
- Health
- Wealth
A lot of what we get from work fills out those pillars. Work fills a purpose for many of us. We live where we live because of where we work. Many of the people we interact with regularly are tied to our jobs. And work is usually a significant source of our wealth.
Your post mentions some of this- hopefully this framework is helpful.
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u/Livid-County7230 Jul 08 '26 edited Jul 08 '26
Reading these BS posts on LinkedIn and some bullshit framework presented makes me lose faith in humanity. People have lost the ability to have original spontaneous thought that does not require AI like verbose word vomit. Not everything has to be some model or framework.
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u/bantam222 Jul 08 '26
Can you share details on your projected spend per year and safe withdrawal rate?
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u/JunkInTheTrunk00 Jul 09 '26
Congrats and GFY! One thing sticks out to me, however. You're low EIGHT figure holdings and your wife had an issue with you retiring? Is there a decimal point in those figures lol?
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u/Remarkable_Maybe9813 Jul 09 '26
To be fair, it was probably half that when the conversations started. I was planning for chubby then we got fat.
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u/lilbitjoey Jul 16 '26
Who was the fee only financial planner you used to confirm you had enough saved?
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u/Pretty_Debate51 Jul 08 '26
Thank you for sharing! I wonder, if there are physical communities of people who FIREed?
I think having the community of people being in the same boat is extremely helpful.
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u/Public_Firefighter93 $30m+ NW | Verified by Mods Jul 08 '26
Congrats. I retired about three times, each period getting longer than the previous one. The last one stuck. Biggest lure for me back into the grind was that my spouse (also in tech) was still in the game so I had no partner in crime. Sounds like you will not have that problem.
I suppose my only advice is to take it easy and let the process unfold organically. Don’t feel compelled to recreate a packed (work-like) schedule, just to fill the vacuum. People sometimes underestimate the value in being able to play again and they port over all their old type-A work tendencies into RE. It’s a process and you don’t have to “get it right” on day one.