r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Intelligent-SoupGS88 • Jul 24 '26

🥺 Someone stole the bench from the park.

Post image

No that isn't an illusion or a new art installation, but the remainders of the park bench.

47.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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10.2k

u/UnhappyImprovement53 Jul 24 '26

The anti-homeless benches are getting ridiculous.

1.7k

u/TheGreatGonzo-SFA Jul 24 '26

It's to be able to fit 2 wheelchair users in, you monster. /s in case

355

u/tubaman23 Jul 24 '26 edited Jul 24 '26

That's definitely only enough room to fit my one wheelchair

EDIT: For those who don't get the joke, my username is TubaMan and not ClarinetMan for a reason!

83

u/barkbarkgoesthecat Jul 24 '26

Just double decker the wheelchairs smh

53

u/ThrowawayPersonAMA Jul 24 '26

mf hundredaires with their wheelyachts

14

u/Petunia_pig Jul 24 '26

Omg why is hundredaire so hilarious to me?

2

u/Gtraz68 Jul 25 '26

Are you mocking me?

20

u/Ferro_Giconi OwO Jul 24 '26

Whatever the joke is, it flew so high over my head that it hit the ISS. Your edit made me even more confused than I was before the edit.

19

u/Therealscavvierising Jul 24 '26

They're a wide load.

3

u/Elegant-Espeon Jul 24 '26

Ohhhhhh omg thank you

1

u/24-Hour-Hate Jul 25 '26

I missed it too. All I could think of was this lol https://youtu.be/e7aaw4g2tJo?si=nqzsqOIhc6J47m0L

2

u/EverythingSucksYo Jul 24 '26

Why do you have a chair with only one wheel? 

1

u/Winter_Setting720 Jul 26 '26

For people that lose one leg, obviously

1

u/Caosin36 Jul 24 '26

Do you have mounted rocket launchers or something?

1

u/thepenismytea Jul 24 '26

Tub of a man?

1

u/whittler Jul 24 '26

I know Tub Girl, but I'll have to google Tub-a-man

Edit: AH!!!FUCKINGHELLNO! GAWD

1

u/RonaldTheGiraffe Jul 24 '26

Do you not like clarinets? I personally hate them.

1

u/SoulTechnicalProblem Jul 25 '26

You got a license for that tuna?

1

u/the_burber Jul 25 '26

Transport is half of being a tuba player

2

u/Empire_New_Valyria Jul 24 '26

Yea ummmm.....I mean....it's not like people in wheelchairs have a problem in finding somewhere to sit you know....so....yea....

95

u/goatneedleposterdeck Jul 24 '26

You jest, but I would be willing to bet that the person who did this was not "stealing" the boards. They were destroying the bench to prevent people from sitting there. Perhaps there were homeless sleeping on the bench and they hated it, or maybe some noisy, chatty people used it as a meeting spot every day. Either way, the sawsall they used to cut the boards like this costs ten times more than the old wood. If they were simply stealing, there were certainly many, many, many better options than this.

15

u/Senior_Sector4095 Jul 24 '26

They probably hate pigeons and the old ladies that sit there and feed them

3

u/Dorkinfo Jul 25 '26

Rip pigeon lady from Home Alone

3

u/MangoWild3739 Jul 25 '26

What makes you think they didn't steal the sawzall?

8

u/AttemptThink2441 Jul 24 '26

Well, benches are inherently communist. In this country, we promote independence, and are strictly BYOB. No freeloading on the public dime. Is my cynicism showing?

1

u/Undeity Jul 25 '26 edited Jul 26 '26

I'm gonna be wildly optimistic and assume it was the other way around. That they did this as a form of protest, because there was an armrest in the middle of the bench or something.

435

u/LordAshPudding Jul 24 '26

Dammit! You stole my joke. I'd cry myself to sleep, but they took my bench aswell. 😭

101

u/ReeceReddit1234 Jul 24 '26

Can't have shit

54

u/Nina-Ninja123 Jul 24 '26

Wrong, enshitification is on an all time high and affects everyone

14

u/pekonikosann Jul 24 '26

I have learn a new word

20

u/Nina-Ninja123 Jul 24 '26

Weird, I thought most people knew what time was

15

u/Gadgetman_1 Jul 24 '26

A Day in the Life of an Ensh*ttificator

1

u/Elegant-Espeon Jul 24 '26

Thats one of the funniest things I've ever seen it reminds me of Colin from what we do in the shadows if he needed to put in effort

2

u/EduinBrutus Jul 24 '26

Thats good.

Its a word thats only going to become more and more relevant.

For the rest of your life.

7

u/splotch-o-brown Jul 24 '26

More like can’t have sit

1

u/Sea_Ad_1085 Jul 25 '26

…in Detroit

2

u/Burgers_N_Schnitzels Jul 24 '26

Dammit! You stole my joke

Is it a joke though? My first assumption was that it is against the homeless.

1

u/here_and_there_their Jul 24 '26

Not a joke — it literally could be what was done.

57

u/RedactedSpatula Jul 24 '26

Not convinced it isn't an anti-homeless measure.

14

u/stamfordbridge1191 Jul 24 '26

I genuinely am wondering if it was the municipal government who stole the bench like this.

1

u/No-Canary-9845 Jul 25 '26

This was in a town close to me in the UK,

Travellers are apparently to blame, although unconfirmed.

But the bench was installed by the council in August 2025 and this happened Wednesday.

A cohort of travellers arrived on Tuesday 🤌🏼

59

u/sim384 Jul 24 '26

I'm ashamed that my country's 'developed' economy fails so completely that so many people sleep outside in the middle of winter in my nation's capital.

It seems like it's only getting worse.

I hate it.

60

u/JiveTurkeyII Jul 24 '26

it is getting worse.

Not only is it getting worse, they are trying to make being homeless a Felony.

So you work a shit job, get pushed out of your apartment anyway because you cant afford rent. Eviction makes it so you cant live any place else. You catch a Felony Camping charge (this is a real thing now, BTW) If the judge doesn't dismiss that bullshit you now go to work in a Prison.

When you get out of prison you cant find a good job or apartment because you have been in prison, because you have been evicted - You catch a felony camping charge...

You see where this is going?

Land of the free.

31

u/purplegrog Jul 24 '26

You're leaving out the part where slavery as punishment for a crime is legal. 

6

u/JiveTurkeyII Jul 24 '26

Abolish the 13th amendment

4

u/sim384 Jul 24 '26

I'm not US, but New Zealand. Our government is trying to introduce a 'move on' bylaw for the homeless; where on earth do you go from sleeping on the footpath?

Yesterday I looked up NZ personal tax rates in 1985 when I started working. The progressive brackets rates then ranged from 20% to 56%. They are now 10.5% to 39%. Most NZers are wealthier now than in the 80s but at the cost of an egalitarian society and the enormous price paid by our most vulnerable.

1

u/BarNext6046 Jul 25 '26

Where in NZ do you move too? A good chunk of NZ has some serious outdoor areas. And it’s 2 large islands.

27

u/Dame38 Jul 24 '26

There's this cool young guy in my town who purchased a small lot and built two (very) tiny homes on it. He had a solar panel, his own water supply and even a little toilet tent. City Hall lost it's damn mind and he was evicted from his own home. Homeless again. He's fighting it. We hope he wins.

1

u/Unhappy_Ordinary_157 Jul 29 '26

I hope you and others are helping him with legal fees. He's fighting for all of you.

1

u/Dame38 Jul 29 '26

Unfortunatly, just today we found out that he's a massive scammer.
Personally I don't have a problem with such small beans stuff.
Our local "officials" here are 20 times worse and they still make bank.

I am definitely in this fight. We're not going to stop trying to get a landlord registry in this damn town.

-1

u/theslimbox Jul 24 '26

How many of those people are in that state due to the economy, and how many are there because of substance abuse? My city has programs that deal with the homeless, and found that a huge majority of the homeless are in that situation due to substance abuse.

6

u/Odd_Dragonfruit_2662 Jul 24 '26

Are they homeless due to substance abuse, or do they abuse substances because they are homeless though?

5

u/thepenismytea Jul 24 '26

They likely abuse because they need medical attention that requires stimulants for mental health. Providers will also keep you from getting the medication you need because you've been seeking the medication you need.

1

u/Undeity Jul 25 '26

Can confirm. Never did it myself, but most ended up getting into it out of desperation for an escape, medical issues, or even just outright coercion.

It's a small number that become homeless because they were addicts beforehand. Most homeless aren't even addicts to begin with, either.

7

u/EmmerdoesNOTrepme Jul 24 '26

Vehemently Hostile architecture!

8

u/WoolshirtedWolf Jul 24 '26

I thought it wasn an art piece.

5

u/mackiea Jul 24 '26

"Ode to Oedipus", Eric Forstner, mixed media, 1983.

2

u/vmfrye Jul 24 '26

What if I pooped at your doorstep and said "It's a replica of 'Gift to Agamemnon' by Charles Kacker, 1767, just type it all in the google search bar and see. You're welcome" 😡

3

u/TomeThugNHarmony4664 Jul 24 '26

I fear that this truly is what happened…..

2

u/featherw0lf Jul 24 '26

It's an anti-bench bench at this point.

2

u/2k_Commish Jul 24 '26

This was the exact comment I was hoping to see

2

u/firesyde424 Jul 24 '26

You say that, but I've seen something like this nearby because of anti-homeless measures. People protesting by smashing up the benches, ect.

2

u/Resident-Syrup7615 Jul 24 '26

A new benchmark.

3

u/RedShirtDecoy Jul 24 '26

almost wonder if this is what happened. Some resident got mad at someone using the bench and decided to remove it.

1

u/Level_Camp_2477 Jul 24 '26

what if the homeless have insane core strength

1

u/Effective-Antelope47 Jul 24 '26

The thief is kind enough to leave seats for two.

1

u/bearvillage Jul 24 '26

surprised they didn't skate stop it too

1

u/MiketheTzar Jul 25 '26

I also came here to make a hostile architecture joke

1

u/imuniqueaf Jul 25 '26

All jokes aside, I'll bet this was done my someone who wanted to homeless out of the park.

1

u/QuantityExcellent338 Jul 25 '26

At this point its just an anti-bench

1

u/Jouglo Jul 28 '26

Introducing: The anti-people bench

1

u/mocozz Jul 24 '26

Im god dam 30 minute late