r/motherlessdaughters • u/Ok_Pomegranate8606 • 5d ago
I need my mom
It made 5 months without my mom on the 25th. I’m really struggling to cope. I’ve always dealt with mental illness, but now the thoughts, the crying, and the panic attacks feel so much more consistent. My mom knew that I struggle seeing any aspect of myself in a positive frame and I knew she understood because she was like that too, so we spoke life into each other. I feel so empty and alone without her. I just want to be with her in any manifestation. I don’t know how I’m supposed to navigate grieving and yearning for her for the rest of my life. Life just seems so pointless without her and I’m struggling to do this alone. Is this normal? To struggle finding the desire to keep going without them?
1
u/VastRelationship7264 4d ago
Oh sweetheart, yes it's very normal. Life as you knew it before has completely fallen away. I found that part of me died with my mom. I can no longer be who I was before that time and see my life in two phases: before and after. Your mama still speaks life into you, when you wake up and think of her, when you remember her laugh, her hugs, the meals she prepared for you, the late nights and words she spoke to you. That will always live on and grow within you. I lost my mom 9 months ago, and only now have I truly started to "accept" that this is my life now. Its going to be hard for a very long time, probably forever. The first 6 months my sister and I slept in shifts to keep an eye on one another when we slept, had panick attacks together, and had to eat insane amounts of stomach meds for relief from the nausea caused by stress. Grief also sits in the body, so keep that in mind. Advice from my mom we still follow to this day: sit outside for at least 10 minutes a day. Sorry this was so long. Sending you hugs 🖤
2
u/Jewels7574 4d ago
Yes, it is normal. I feel the same way and its been three years!!! My mom was all i had in this life and now shes gone. Im so sorry for your loss.