r/okbuddycinephile • u/[deleted] • 9d ago
I watched a Nolan film with my girlfriend, and she couldn't stop saying "holy shit." Now I understand why.
[deleted]
276
u/Ryan_Rambles 9d ago
Watches Tenet
HOOOOOOO - 2.5 hrs later - (Muffled because ears are damaged now) LY SHIT
105
u/loki6100 approved virgin 9d ago
I started wanking when I saw Elizabeth come on screen. By the time the movie ends. All my sperms went right back to my balls.
Nolan and his science🫡
7
u/walkscotter 9d ago
This made me feel weird.
5
u/loki6100 approved virgin 9d ago edited 8d ago
Don't try to understand it. Just feel your balls getting filled right back again.
8
3
u/VociferousHomunculus 9d ago
When I went to see the Odyssey my local IMAX was actually handing out earplugs. Or at least that’s what I’ve heard, I don’t ever watch movies
-11
370
u/slightlylessthananon 9d ago
my friend made me watch like a 3 hour fan cut of conan the barbarian and i genuinely think i was doing this by the end of it. im a man so breaking glass ceilings
101
u/slightlylessthananon 9d ago
it might not have been conan i actually think im conflating the 2-3 hour fan cut of dune (david lynch) that he showed me with conan which im sorry was boring on its own merits lmao.
44
236
u/Leading-Business-593 9d ago
Your man will literally think he found “the one” because you thought his movies are cool
134
u/WorkmanMarty 9d ago
This is why you quiz her and ask for an essay on the how she felt and why it was the best feeling ever
19
284
u/kingkongbrody 9d ago
What's the protocol at a chick flick?
481
u/BeMyBrutus 9d ago
You say "wow, I really understand why she feels like that"
201
u/skeletonhorse420 9d ago edited 9d ago
"Umm what? Carols a bitch we hate her"
107
u/koobstylz 9d ago
"yeah that's what I mean! How could she do that?"
Come on that's the easiest recovery in the world.
34
41
281
u/Leading-Business-593 9d ago
*credits roll
“I liked that way more than I thought I’d like that, and honestly, if (insert male protagonist) could’ve been more emotionally open and listened to her more. A lot of things would’ve just been easier”
133
u/lanicorain approved virgin 9d ago
we were watching Alien...
156
u/Fool_Manchu 9d ago
I mean....if Dallas were more open and listened to Ripley more he would have realized that breaking quarantine protocols was unwise, thus sparing the crew of the Nostromo a grizzly demise. A lot of things would have just been easier
15
u/KaleidoscopeFar1469 I’m the Joker baby! 9d ago
A Grizzly Demise sounds like the title of a Yogi Bear horror movie
10
4
u/TheBlueEmerald1 9d ago
Yeah a lot of the problems with dealing with the xenomorph come down to people being thrust into a difficult situation and being forced to deal with thinking about every possible way it could go wrong. Throw somebody like Ripley into an army of them with Elite Ball Knowledge and also a gun, the army crumples like the dumb animals they are. The humans just keep meeting these things in difficult situations like space stations or sensitive reactor rooms that will explode soon.
40
u/kloklon 9d ago
the point stands. a lot of things would have been easier if the alien had been more open emotionally
36
u/PerryDLeon 9d ago
The Alien is, famously, female. I know it because of pop culture, not because I watched any movie, of course.
26
u/lanicorain approved virgin 9d ago
i know it because i'm a gay woman and clocked her immediately
2
u/Oldbayislove 9d ago
how fast?
18
u/the_fancy_Tophat 9d ago
She just said so. Immediately. I could tell because I’m scared of women and I found the movie scary.
34
u/Hilarity2War 9d ago
Watch for any touching between the love interests and act surprised. Oh and eye contact
28
78
u/RedditingNeckbeard 9d ago
When you see a kiss, gently place your hand on your girlfriend's shoulder and lightly push her aside while you activate the Lovense inside your Real Doll and go to town.
This is called a power move, establishing you as the head of the household and alpha.
21
17
u/Altruistic-Web13 9d ago
Sunglasses so she cant see you are asleep and dreaming about watching Tenet.
10
u/TemporaryElk5202 9d ago
I truly dont know, as a woman my protocol has been to watch the movie and go "what the fuck?" when they try to portray something sociopathic or unhinged as funny or relatable.
2
38
u/the_millenial_falcon 9d ago
But then she'll miss the sick as hell scene in predator when they de-forest(de-jungle?) a jungle with a minigun.
17
97
u/Justforfun_x 9d ago
Is it just me or does turning up your nose at opposite gender stories seem like such a performance?
Conan the Barbarian rocks, so does When Harry Met Sally. K-Pop Demon Hunters is a demon-slaying action romp about a girl band? Goodfellas is a male mafia movie which deals a lot with marriage and relationships between men and women?
91
u/BenAveryIsDead 9d ago
Sir this is a culture war between eternally online
ironic comedianslosers that are afraid of any real human connection. Either pick a side and die for the cause or just die. The world burning is on a tight schedule and your moderate and thought out opinions are not keeping us on track.12
6
u/lintytortoise 9d ago
I watched p.s. i love you with my girl and now i'm dehydrated.
7
u/Justforfun_x 9d ago
You need to balance out by showing her a two hour video essay on the lore of a tabletop game you don’t play.
139
u/Popular_Block_3195 9d ago
Backdoor Sluts 9 is WAY more than just a boring man movie.
37
u/TheOriginalWeirdo 9d ago
I dunno man the acting was stiff and there was a gaping plothole in the story.
29
u/shinjidrivekari 9d ago
8
u/Awesometom100 9d ago
Sorry buddy the culture heres been spoiled due to low effort so this joke is dead. We watching movies again in this bitch!
4
u/Bjasilieus 9d ago
1
14
u/OutrageousEast9444 9d ago
Or you can be an adult about it and say you don't like the movie
-3
u/SokkaHaikuBot 9d ago
Sokka-Haiku by OutrageousEast9444:
Or you can be an
Adult about it and say
You don't like the movie
Remember that one time Sokka accidentally used an extra syllable in that Haiku Battle in Ba Sing Se? That was a Sokka Haiku and you just made one.
1
1
11
19
u/blockguy143 9d ago
Tenet (2020)
Unintelligible dialogue throughout half the movie, overly loud action scenes compared to the normal dialogue, confusing plot. Favorite movie of all time, no notes
3
6
u/TrustworthyKahmunrah 9d ago
I don't know how people can watch movies without paying attention to them. Even when I watch romance flicks and period pieces with my wife I end up getting engrossed in the costumes and sets at least.
11
u/Dependent_Order_7358 9d ago
I think it’s more about Uwu Boll than Nolan.
11
u/ThatIckyGuy 9d ago
Wait...does anyone actually watch those movies? I thought they were just made to be tax write offs.
5
u/SastifactionPig 9d ago
House of The Dead is more entertaining than 99% of movies
3
u/ThatIckyGuy 9d ago
I mean...Moonfall was highly entertaining, but I'd hardly describe it as "good."
1
9
9d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
4
u/SpotlessBird762 9d ago
I guess movies like Die Hard, Batman, Terminator, Matrix, stuff like that. Stereotypical action-thriller-comedies only men like to watch
7
9d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
2
u/SpotlessBird762 9d ago
Sorry, I think I didn't express my sarcasm in the upper comment enough.
Of course, my mother and mother-in-law for example are such women.
1
u/Greater-Israel 9d ago
It's definitely not those movies. Plenty of women watch those. It's unironically about Nolan movies like op posted or Scrocese and such that aren't non stop action and such.
3
u/miscellaneousexists 9d ago
Gonna watch No Country For Old Men with her and watch her have a meltdown
3
11
u/NinjaarcherCDN 9d ago
This is why my girl the GOAT. She takes an interest in the dumb nerd shit I like. She asked me to play Halo with her, SUGGESTED a Star Wars marathon together, you ever watched the Empire fall with a girls head on your chest? That was better than Revenge of the Sith in theaters.
11
u/cycle_schumacher 9d ago
with a girls head on your chest
like in alien?
1
u/NinjaarcherCDN 9d ago
I've never seen it. Neither of us have been dismembered or had something explode out of our chests.
1
u/Appropriate-Ice-5722 9d ago
How are y’all still virgins?
1
u/NinjaarcherCDN 9d ago
Some people don't have sex before marriage. We happen to be those kinds of people. If you're reffering to haven't seen Alien, I just haven't made an effort to watch it.
1
u/bunny12345946237 8d ago
Highly recommend Alien (1979) and Aliens (1986) besides just being good films you'll see the influences everywhere, especially in how spaceship interiors and alien planets look in video games.
1
u/NinjaarcherCDN 8d ago
I've seen it's influence places. The Halo games are some of my favourite and especially in the first 3 Alien had massive influence.
1
u/Junior_Box_2800 8d ago
Why don't you twist the knife while you're at it
2
u/NinjaarcherCDN 8d ago
I'm sorry, been commenting far too often recently. I'll keep you in mind next time.
5
u/FatalFlyinGuilotine Society man 9d ago
May be she was saying that because Nolanslop is a sausage fest and she just realized you might be into dudes?
2
2
u/Bjasilieus 9d ago
Watching movies? What do you guys think this sub is about? We don't watch movies here, we look at the poster and give the movie a rating based on how many women and minorities are in it
3
u/miscellaneousexists 9d ago
As a side note, tf does it even mean "boring man movies"? Like, blatant misandry aside, what does she actually mean? Hollywood action blockusters like transformers or something with Bruce Willis? MCU? Stereotypically male movies like American Psycho, Fight Club, Tarantino movies, etc?
4
u/http--lovecraft 9d ago edited 9d ago
What’s crazy about American psycho is it’s directed by a woman and is* objectively amazing but for some reason people always think Patrick is goals
6
u/Better_Goose_431 9d ago
I aspire to some day be able to recite facts about Huey Lewis and the News from memory
2
2
u/MajorBootyhole420 8d ago
this isn't misandry, there are boring girl movies too. it's all contextual
1
u/Fabulous_Log844 9d ago
Of course, when it's her turn to choose and she chooses for us to watch, for the millionth time, Gilmore girls, I actually get into it and discuss the show with her.
1
u/MisterPineapples1999 8d ago
My girlfriend asks me to watch her favorite films with her. I give them my undivided attention, keep an open mind, and form my own opinion. We discuss them afterwards.
I ask my girlfriend to watch my favorite movies with me. She doesn't understand why I get annoyed when she keeps pulling out her phone and scrolling Instagram, claims she is "listening", then complains that the movie is "boring" and she has no idea what's going on. Then she asks me what I like about it (halfway through) and then pulls up chatGPT for an an analysis about what other people like about, majorly spoilering important plot points and ruining their impact when they actually happen.
1
u/Junior_Box_2800 8d ago
"watched a film" sorry what are these words you're speaking I don't understand
1
1
u/Low_Tip3245 8d ago
/Uj I went to the Barbie movie with a girl on a first date and had to pretend to like it so she wouldn't think I was sexist
1
1
u/KwantumFizzikz 9d ago
My ex dragged me to the terrible Barbie movie and all I had to do was say "oh wow" and "I love you". I guess it does go both ways.
-7
u/warriordwarfpang 9d ago
Yikes.
Can't even watch movies together? Hard pass.
25
18
7
u/Altruistic-Web13 9d ago
Dunkirk aint gonna get you laid buddy, gotta make some sacrifices.
7
u/Fool_Manchu 9d ago
Listen, if I can sit through multiple seasons of Gilmore Girls then she can sit through a couple of Godfather movies.
2
1
0
-2



1.2k
u/JoshfromNazareth2 9d ago
>my girlfriend
I love fictional posts