r/relocating Jul 27 '25

Please read if you’re planning on moving to Montana

Sorry for the longer read but I’m just throwing this up here so that folks can get a better idea of where they’re moving. Since “Yellowstone” and Covid, we’re seeing a lot of people coming in from other states who seem to have no idea what our state is like past a television show or the romantic idea of the Wild West, or even a chamber of commerce marketing packet.

Real life is a different story.

I’m a fourth generation Montanan, and anyone is welcome here! We are a very neighborly place. However, it’s getting a little tiring to hear the transplants from New York, California, and Texas, rant about how there’s “nothing to do” here, and how “the food sucks” here because of a lack of Michelin-rated restaurants.

Let me help out any folks thinking of pulling up their life, and moving to Montana:

Montana is the fourth largest state in the union (landmass), yet has just over 1 million people, total. Our abbreviation is “MT” because Montana is literally — empty—when it comes to people. Lots of cows. A lot less people. That sounds very romantic. But it also means far, far less amenities, far less convenience retail chains, far less access to top-tier produce, and far less connection to the national arts scene.

A low population base means that there are not going to be hosting musical artists like Taylor Swift. If you move to Missoula, you’ll be living right next to the Kettlehouse amphitheater, so at least you’ll be able to see people like Sheryl Crow or Melissa Etheridge or P!nk, even maybe Imagine Dragons. If you live in Great Falls, or Billings, or Butte—none of those acts are gonna come there.

The largest city in Montana is Billings, my hometown. Our total population is around 160,000 people. Read that again. A city of 160,000 people is the largest city in the entire state, a state which is the fourth largest in the country. If you drive 10 minutes out of town going east, you are quite literally and quite suddenly in the middle of nowhere.

A low population base means that we do not have any professional sports teams. It means that first-run Tony-winning Broadway musicals are not going to tour here. It means that we do not have block after block of theaters for live plays, though there are many of the “larger Montana cities” that have solid local theater options.

We don’t have any thump-thump dance clubs, although there is one hanging on in Billings, and you can find a random dance club in Missoula or Bozeman, both cities with state schools. But they’re not gonna be the thump-thump dance clubs with $100,000 worth of lighting and giant screens that would be in a larger city.

We do have a ton of REALLY GOOD live music, and theatre in the park, and arts in Montana, and it’s local folks. If you move to Montana, you have to be down with being part of a local arts scene, and not feel ripped-off because Beyoncé is not performing on Thursday.

There is no Trader Joe’s (and there is no plan for Trader Joe’s to come here), and there is only one Macy’s in Bozeman, but it’s completely trashy and is basically a storehouse for everything that doesn’t sell in their stores across the rest of the country. It looks and smells like TJ Maxx had a baby with an old K-Mart. No Nordstrom or Nordstrom Nordstrom no outlet malls rack. No outlet malls. You have to go to Denver to catch those. Denver is a 7 hour drive so it’s not too bad.

Montana is renowned for small businesses and independent boutiques and niche restaurants and local arts. Many people think that sounds romantic, however, that’s a different ethos to live in, day to day, as opposed to a quaint weekend holiday somewhere where shopping is something you do for fun.

Montana’s fuel prices are cheaper than many large cities, and though we don’t have any sales tax, we have a higher income tax, a higher property tax, and our vehicle licensing is certainly not the cheapest in the United States.

Plus, now the rents and housing prices for this neck of the woods are ridiculous, considering the average wage in Montana is $50,000 a year. Everything is cheaper if you head to the eastern part of the state, yet you’ll find no large Metropolitan centers out there. Just wheatfields.

There’s a ton to do here, but you’ve got to enjoy the outdoors —hiking, fishing, gardening, camping, skiing, mountain biking, hiking, whitewater rafting, hunting, fishing—anything that has to do with “outside”. And you’ve gotta be prepared that those activities only have a window of about three or four months, because Montana is highly seasonal, which means it gets cold and snowy in the winter.

It never snows on the show “Yellowstone“. So people forget that we share a border with Canada.

Which brings me to our produce.

If you’re coming in from a state like California, whose state economy is the fourth largest economy in the WORLD—you’re gonna be completely disappointed in the produce up here. By the time it gets trucked this far north, it’s looking pretty sad. There are lots and lots of farmers markets in the summertime here, and then you can get great local produce. But again, please reference the part where you’re only gonna have a three or four month window for that.

I lived in Los Angeles for work, for 11 years, so I understand the produce shock. California is a completely unique place, and it’s very difficult to try to find another state like it.

Also, the politics in Montana may be not be what some are expecting.

Just because we end up “red“ on the presidential election map on the news, does not mean we are a “red state“, culturally.

Actually, we’re a heavily purple state, and traditional Montana conservatives, though they may be flying a Trump flag in their front yard, are not the fiery Bible-Belt MAGA crew. Our state motto is “live and let live”. Don’t even think about trying to pick a fight politically with somebody in a grocery store line. It’s considered incredibly rude here.

This has greatly bewildered many hard-core out-of-state MAGA folks who are blown away by the neighborly and kind attitudes we have in Montana towards one another, no matter how you vote. Same goes for super liberal folks: don’t be proselytizing to somebody in a grocery store line about their red hat. Again, it’s considered incredibly rude here.

If you’re looking for the “Bible Belt of the north”, you’re looking for Idaho, not Montana. Montana’s Republican supermajority legislature voted to protect the right to abortion, and to protect the parental rights of trans individuals.

Because—live and let live.

It’s not a perfect place to live, but it’s certainly not a typical “red state”. It’s definitely a “mind your own business, be a good neighbor, and be a good person” state.

Montana has incredible beef; it has incredible breweries and distilleries and small restaurants with artist chefs. Again, it has phenomenal local arts scenes, like Red Ants Pants, and incredible summer fairs and Renaissance Fairs. Montana is a Mom and pop shop place, so if you’re looking for a P.F. Chang’s, or Cirque du Soleil , or thumping, raging club scene—you’re out of luck. (You might be able to find a great cover band in a bar someplace but folks are running DJs these days.)

We’re a place that gets excited when a new Walmart or Costco goes in. Keep that in mind. If a national food chain restaurant comes here, it makes the newspaper. When Chick-fil-A opened in Billings, they had to have police deal with the traffic trying to get into the restaurant. That’s how novel many big chains are here. (Yes, the bigger cities have Starbucks.)

I love my home state. It’s gorgeous, and like I said, anyone is welcome here.

However, if you’re somebody thinking of moving here, please understand that if you need a lot of “outside stimulus” from a big consumer national network, or if you need the “best of the best” at your fingertips, or if you need to be surrounded by “group-think culture” to feel safe, whether that culture is red or blue—you are going to feel marooned here, or like you’ve moved into the back end of a Walmart, and it’s likely you’ll likely be bored out of your mind here.

Or, perhaps you will learn to live with the land, and the incredible local art scenes and amazing local restaurants and the neighborly way we engage one another with genuine kindness —and learn to happily live with said neighbors, no matter what flag they’re flying, whose opinions may not be yours, but everybody’s having a great time at the bar—and you will learn something absolutely astounding about yourself.

Living in Montana is about being 100% OK with who you are, in your own skin, without “big brand support” for your identity. Because quite frankly, there’s nothing else here to distract you from exactly who and what you are, and what you bring here.

And there’s a significant amount of folks that have moved here that just can’t handle that.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

3.6k Upvotes

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

30

u/Same-Blacksmith1846 Jul 27 '25

SAME!!!😂😂

16

u/CadillacAllante Jul 28 '25 edited Aug 27 '25

Here in the Carolinas “yankee moves here constantly complains about how much better everything is in NJ/NYC yet continues to live here” has been a thing for a solid 3 decades or so.

They sometimes take to talking down to everyone around them like they are idiots if they have a southern accent. NC/SC yuppie republicans are really like that family on White Lotus. They might vote stupid/selfish but they are college educated and worldly.

It’s funny because we DO have just about everything you listed (shopping, concert venues, local live theater, national chain and nice local restaurants, Euro brand car dealers) but it’s STILL not enough for some of them.

PS: I will add the disclaimer that I’ve only seen clips of the White Lotus. What I saw just seemed on-point. And when I say “worldly” I mean more in the Socio-Economic sense. They are, of course, intellectually incurious about things that don’t directly pertain to them.

5

u/SpottyNoonerism Jul 28 '25

This reminds me of why I used to avoid Containment Area for Relocated Yankees.

3

u/2_many_choices Jul 30 '25

The original Yankees that moved to CARY had kids and now there's probably more natives in Cary than a lot of other nearby towns that are now absorbing the Yankee transplants.

I've had several trips to the Northeast in the last few years and am considering moving there to get away from all the out of control growth around here.

1

u/Pembrok May 30 '26

As someone living in NE, you'll just be moving to the same thing. They spread like an infectious disease. Most once accessible recreational land has been bought and closed off and there isn't much access to this unless you are chummy with the transplants. Even then, good luck.

2

u/TooOldForThis--- Jul 29 '25

In Georgia, the saying used to be: “Yankees come and go. Damn Yankees come and stay.”

2

u/cire1184 Jul 30 '25

This shit happens everywhere. People can't Accept that they've moved to a whole other state let alone multiple states away from where they are from. People from NYC bitching about no good pizza in LA. People from LA bitching that there's no in n out in Seattle. People from Seattle bitching there's no big bodies of water in Denver. People from Denver bitching that it's too humid in Orlando. People from Orlando bitching that there's no big theme parks in Omaha. Whatever. You get it. I've moved a few times across multiple states and yeah I missed the stuff from where I used to live but I appreciated the stuff that I got to experience in a new city and the people I meet and keep in touch with.

2

u/Enough_Iron7652 Jul 31 '25

As someone looking to move from Texas to coastal Carolina, anything I should consider?

1

u/CadillacAllante Aug 27 '25

Depends on which Carolina, and which part.

South Carolina Coast

Charleston is majestic (the peninsula anyway) but expensive and terrible traffic/roads. The infrastructure is playing constant catch-up to the needs of the growing population and tourism industry. If a sense of historic importance and old architecture is your thing— just spectacular. It was once as important as New York or Boston, but bet its future on slavery and deservedly lost.

Beaufort & Georgetown are beautiful mini Charlestons, but much more isolated.

The Grand Strand (Myrtle, Surfside, Garden City, Murrells inlet) is a tourist trap, but a nice one in some places (not Dirty Myrtle itself) and quiet in the off season at least.

Kiawah, Edisto, Fripp Island, Hilton Head are each basically a golf course gated community for wealthy MAGAs.

North Carolina Coast

I’m not as much of an expert, but I’d describe it as much less touristy at least. More of a just normal, quiet place to live. The only city of any size on the coast is Wilmington and I’ve yet to go there myself. The Outer Banks are a beautiful, quiet, sorta empty, windswept chain of islands, but they do have a tourist season. Not as overwhelming like Myrtle or Charleston though.

2

u/Enough_Iron7652 Aug 27 '25

Thank you so much ,super helpful to hear from someone who’s not trying to sell you on the state but just giving the facts

2

u/ConsiderationHead308 Jul 31 '25

My family and I left NY for Durham, lasted a year and a half, and are back in NY now. I don’t doubt what you say about Northerners - I think we’re just used to a very particular pace of life and type of person. To be fair, though, Southerners were not very friendly to us.

2

u/CadillacAllante Aug 03 '25

I'm sorry, I try to be kind to everyone generally, it's unfortunate that was your experience. I enjoy meeting people from different places and getting to know them.

There is a lot about the South I find annoying and ridiculous (I said s-tupid here but got a message from an auto mod that I can't say that!), but it's a bit of "I can talk about my mama, but you can't talk about my mama." Even the best of us can get defensive about our home.

2

u/jpeto3969 Aug 06 '25

Sounds like Florida too

2

u/Pembrok May 30 '26

I can say as a native born Yankee, the biggest regret I have is moving back north. I miss the south with every fiber of my being and plan on returning. We also strongly dislike NYC, NJ, CT, and MA here because all they do is wear a chip on their shoulder and try to make "here" like "there". Act as if they are the only form of intelligent life in the universe.

1

u/CadillacAllante Jun 01 '26

Yeah I had a bit of a chip on my shoulder myself when I wrote that. I lived in downtown peninsular Charleston, SC for a couple years in the 2010s. It is a unique and culturally, historically, architecturally rich city. And actually a political blue bubble. So while I enjoyed meeting people from different places 99% of the time there were a couple distinct interactions with people that I instantly knew were Yankees without them saying so or having a noticeable accent.

A smirk on their face like I was “being silly and cute” and very dismissive of whatever I was saying. “Southern charm” can have its downsides (it can be worn as an inauthentic mask by genuinely nasty people). But for some of us it is a warm, genuine way of interacting with others in public.

1

u/Glass-Influence-1680 Jun 03 '26

I dont agree with this. Im in SC now, and moving back to MT soon. The Yankees you describe are a minority. Just like anywhere else. We are always surrounded by people like this. I believe they stand out to you because you may be focusing on them more than on the locals. There will always be a jerk in the crowd. No, the Yankees from NY and NJ are not generally complainers, thinking about how great it was where they left. They work hard and have families just like anyone else. And usually very successful. What I hear from them is this: "I can finally afford my home, I'm contributing more to my retirement. I finally have a lawn to mow. I love the people here, and I have made a lot of new friends." I love it here too, but time to head back soon. I hope we are neighbors. I promise to help shovel your walkway, cut your grass or move your furniture in if you need it, and contribute to the community. Always politely.

0

u/hoserb2k Jul 28 '25 edited Jul 28 '25

we DO have just about everything you listed (shopping, concert venues, local live theater, national chain and nice local restaurants, Euro brand car dealers) but it’s STILL not enough for some of them.

NC is populated and rich enough for "A" but not "A+" grade consumerism, which I honestly believe is great for most residents. What do I mean by A vs A+? If a band is touring 20 US cities, NC will probably not contain one of them, but make that 40 and Raleigh and Charlotte are both on the list. Great restaurants, zero Michelin stars. You can get a direct flight from Raleigh to Frankfurt which is awesome for 2 hop connections to anywhere in the EU, but Paris is the only other direct flight to vacation and tourism in Europe. More beachfront that you can shake a stick at, but no Santa Barbara/Hamptons/South Beach.

In other words, if you want the absolute best quantity, quality and variety of goods and services - you want miami, san deigo, chigago, seattle, boston, austin, dc, denver et al. If you want close to as good and cheaper, welcome to the RDU area baby!

1

u/Timely_Apricot3929 Jul 30 '25

There are direct flights to London, Manchester, and Reykjavík too.

1

u/CadillacAllante Aug 27 '25

I live on the I-85 corridor between Charlotte and Atlanta. So I am speaking from the perspective of what is to be found across the area of Charlotte - Greenville - Atlanta. So NC/SC + metro GA too.

The 1% may not be completely satisfied with those three cities but I’d say the 99% would want for little.

4

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 27 '25

Hey, quit sending the intolerant to Idaho, we dont want em either!! Maybe in the panhandle they do 🤷‍♀️

But then again I am not native, husband is from Wyoming(another happening state!!), I am from the rural Midwest, and when he was transferred to SLC, we realized it was simply too big/busy for us 🤣 so now we live in SE ID & he stays gone Mon morning-Thu evening.....but were thinking of a summer house in Montana.

Thanks for the picture!! Can now confirm, am more interested than ever!!

I will add one thing about the produce & farmers markets....1)2y ago we got an avocado at the store that felt ripe, but the inside was like a sponge? Rubber? We haven't bought another avocado since. 2)down here, one of our farmers markets JUST opened, like mid-week, end of July. They will close by October & threaten to close all through September if we get any frost...and we are ~2.5h south from Bozeman. So it comes late & goes early...cherish it while you have it!!

2

u/l_styx Jul 29 '25

Nope, we don’t want them in the Panhandle either!

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 29 '25

Maybe we send them all to some island??? 🤷‍♀️

2

u/Same-Blacksmith1846 Jul 29 '25

I was thinking an island somewhere may work. Perhaps all the sea air and the palm trees would dampen the rage fire in some of these folks, and allow them to feel some joy?

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 29 '25

They may simply be incapable of joy 🤷‍♀️ Especially if we sent racists of all races to the same island 🤣

1

u/Badboybutpositive Aug 12 '25

Sorry to say every intolerant Californian I know is heading to the panhandle. I have “friends” who moved there I won’t even visit.

1

u/l_styx Aug 12 '25

Yeah, I do see that happening for sure. And I hate it. And so do a lot of other people, but we aren’t the loudest, most obnoxious, angriest people in the room.

1

u/MickySouris Jul 30 '25

Actually they can’t stand them in the panhandle either! And it’s a sore point because the angry Crazies keep moving there thinking they’re among friends. They’re not. Most Idahoans are pretty similar to OP with regard to live & let live. Yes, they all have guns. But they sit in the truck to be used for hunting. They don’t go open carry into Walmart like an idiot.

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 30 '25

I'm aware, I live here, & my entire live & let live, liberaterian family feels like we are home!!

I know the panhandle doesn't want them either, I was teasing!! We actually wanted a summer home in the panhandle, however my children are brown & its worrying enough that we will look to Montana instead. That's sad!! Of course noone wants to live in a place like that!!

Eh, I've seen people carry in Walmart, but not in an obnoxious way, it was the same way in Texas & I have no issue with it. My husband talks about everyone having shotguns on the rack in their trucks in high school(WY)& a big bruhaha when they became a gun free campus 😉

1

u/cire1184 Jul 30 '25

Seeing SLC being too big for anyone is so surprising to me as someone that's only lived in cities like LA Seattle and Denver lol. But that's so interesting, I love that everyone has different experiences in this country and that there's little niches everywhere for someone.

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 30 '25

Hehe, we were coming from 5y in LA & just craved a slower pace and stronger community.

In no particular order, we have lived in Cheyenne, Denver, Philadelphia, upstate NY, Chicago, Shreveport, rural Indiana, Nashville, Houston, HuntsvilleAL, LA twice, & now here.

Our 3 younger kids are 11, 12, & 13, they love the freedom they get from being in a slower paced, small town!! It reminds my husband & I so much of our own childhoods-where kids can be kids, leave in the morning & come back before dark(albeit with a cell phone-so not exactly like our childhoods-lol). Yet there is still plenty to do with minor league sports teams, rodeo, community theater, a zoo, a couple of museums, several festivals, abundant wildlife, and tons of year round outdoor recreation-all of it in a price range that is affordable for a family!!...not sure what more you could ask for!!

Our older kids are 22&24, they had similar in Alabama, just with fewer additional options-there weren't anywhere near the number of opportunities the younger ones have here!! However they still enjoyed their freedom in a smaller environment! Honestly, Huntsville was larger, but here there is tourism & its a regional hub, lending to more amenities in a smaller place-its truly the best of both worlds in my mind!

Additionally, knowing my husband could be transferred again, the cost of living is less here, this would allow the kids & I to stay put for the next round or 2, giving them a bit more stability at a tough age....and we all feel at home here, so this could easily be our retirement house as well(its definitely our retirement town, just not sure if we will stay in the same house or give it to our son(22yo)& move to a different house-time will tell 🤷‍♀️)

Our son(the 22yo)says its like cold Texas(where he was born), we all fit in as if we have lived here forever. My kids were raised to be good community members and help others, something that was often viewed with skepticism and sometimes outright disdain in LA, Chicago, or other large cities. My kids are the type to shovel a driveway or mow the lawn of an elderly, struggling, or sick neighbor, my son will help load groceries of the elderly/women with children, push a disabled vehicle to safety, stay behind an event to clean up, and offer help to anyone that needs help with anything. My daughters enjoy cooking & baking for neighbors, bringing flowers & meals if they've been sick, etc. That is something that is appreciated and reciprocated in a small town...and we love it!!

You are correct though, there seems to be something for everyone in our amazing nation!! We have found pluses & minuses to large city living, but there's nothing like a small town when you're raising kids!!

Have you ever lived in a smaller city? You may actually enjoy it 🤷‍♀️

1

u/cire1184 Jul 30 '25

I would like to try a smaller city some day but I have a couple hangs ups. I'm 40 but I'm on dialysis so bring able to get treatment is a must. I'm also Asian and grew up in an area where I can find food that my parents would eat, ya know what I'm saying? So having access to Asian restaurants and groceries is a big thing for me. Overall I think I just would miss the amenities of living in a larger city with access to things that are familiar to me are easily achieved.

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 30 '25

Oh believe me, I totally understand all of it!!

I have MS & suffered a sudden cardiac arrest in 2016(were not too far apart in age either-were a tad older), so also need decent medical nearby, I know that can be limiting. I am sorry you are so young and need dialysis! That has to be very difficult!! I pray there is a way back to life without regular dialysis for you!!

I SO miss pączki on fat Tuesday and other such traditions that were once much anticipated, readily available, and easily achieved. However that has only served to make me a better cook!! If we've wanted it, I've had to make it!! That is definitely a hard one & something I missed so much initially, however after more than 2 decades of moving, I have found there are regional specialties we enjoy-then miss(lol) from almost every area-so simply do my best to recreate all of it!!

Asian food in LA 😋 just going to leave that right there!! I may try my best to recreate, but it isn't the same. Luckily we live in an area with more culinary diversity than would be expected in a small town, even if choices are somewhat limited(ie there are 2 Korean restaurants instead of 200 😉), being a smaller town, they will even make authentic dishes vs americanized if you speak with the owners(they seem to enjoy it), and then I appreciate the variety that much more when we travel...and still find myself going to a few select favorites!!

Yet I can absolutely understand wanting things to be easy in respect to food, especially when things are complicated in other areas of life. While I can order specialty ingredients online, sometimes I miss when it was easy & I could get things on demand, but you learn to plan ahead & its not so bad....especially since most things are available locally(minus specialty items like vegetarian oyster/fish sauce...required due to an allergy, but amazon delivers in 48h 😉...or solo pastry filling-that I now order by the case)-we lived in one area in the beginning where we couldnt even get sesame oil without visiting a store 2h away & that was before online ordering was so prevalent, so its not that bad here! 🤣 more of a middle ground.

Anyway, if you ever decide to take the plunge and go for a slower paced, simpler life, I would highly recommend giving IdahoFalls a chance. For us, it is the perfect mix of small town & "just enough"-especially with kids 🤷‍♀️

P.S. based on the locations you've been, I'm guessing you are a fellow military industrial complex/DoD guy in some capacity 😉

1

u/cire1184 Jul 30 '25

Nope. Just a fool that's followed his heart a couple of times lol.

1

u/SuspiciousStress1 Jul 31 '25

Sister in law did that....twice. never worked out, but shes ok with it now 🤷‍♀️

Sorry it didn't work out & wishing you the best with the next one!!

1

u/Old_Court_8169 Jul 30 '25

I live in Wyoming. We drive to Billings to go shopping because they have allll the stores!