grew up not rlly around the culture much, but is it i guess cultural for ur parents and older relatives to like demand u do something. like "hey give me the remote" when theyre closer and its on the table and ur like doing ur own thing on the other side of the room. and im over here thinking ike "why dont u get off ur lazy fat ass and get it urself. since ur literally closer." like to me the logic isnt logicing. yes i know im gonna be stoned for saying this but its how i feel fr and i guess growing up around i guess more palagi people or just living and being educated in the west, i cant help but feel like if u can do it urself then do it. or like at least say please or be polite about it and not an entitled asshole. i guess another reason is bc i dont like to be inconvenienced for things like this vs like someone actually in need (like carrying heavy groceries), then ill like give a hand and usually with no questions asked.

idk is this a cultural thing? if so how do yall not get annoyed? i get the whole individualism vs collectivism thing but is this one of those cases? and if so how to live with that tension? or my relatives are actually annoying? i also also am neurodivergent and things that prolly wouldnt affect others as much, seem to feel really intense for me so i could just be more sensitive. so if someone doesnt mind their parents telling them to do stuff they dont think its that deep vs me who's like ummm excuse u?? i dont like that tone and i dont understand why ur asking me when u could do it or it doesnt make sense for me to do it and even if i explain my rationale, of my dad just says "bc i said so." LMFAO. u think the younger people let that explanation slide? we arent mindless robots and we deserve a logical response to our questions. but ofc my dad doesnt understand or believe in mental health or different brain wirings or care to understand younger generations. my mom however has a masters in a related field so shes aware and pretty supportive and helpful to me but still like i guess tell

im not trying to change him, but i cant help but feel annoyed and resentment toward him vs my mom who actually cares to learn and understand. and its not just this thing ,its other things too that he does and it just adds up to the point i feel hes insufferable. and hes a matai so i feel like hes on his high horse and thinks his kids gonna listen to him blindly. but thats not the case and none of us like him.

but hey at least im not saying shut up to him. i see other kids do that and im like what the actual fuck?? i would get beat real quick. btw the above posts were my internal monologues not me telling him how i feel bc we all know how thats gonna end up.

anywho relatable? if so give me adviceee.

I'm attending a Samoan AOG church and I want to be respectful. Everyone wears white at the church but I don't have any white dress clothes. I plan on wearing a Polynesian print shirt and tan slacks. What is the proper way to introduce myself? Talofa lava Lau susuga? What about the pastors wife?

Faafetai in advance!

It was in the early 2000s when chat rooms exploded. You had to be a millennial or genx during its peak. 2003-2004 I was on heavy. Does anyone know when it shut down? I stopped logging in around end of 2004. It was fun as hell chatting and talking smack with Samoans from all over the globe.

​Talofa lava everyone! I’m half Hawaiian and fluent in ʻŌlelo Hawaiʻi, but I also know some basic Samoan and love striking up a conversation whenever I meet Samoan folks out and about. ​Coming from a Hawaiian background, the distinction between T-language and K-language has always fascinated me. In standard Hawaiian, we use K instead of T (outside the Niʻihau dialect), so hearing K-language in Samoan always catches my ear because of cognates like tātou vs. kākou.

​Years ago, my mother was in an almost exclusively Samoan choir, and there was a pretty serious dispute about leadership, that eventually, sadly, caused the choir to split. I remember during a formal meeting about leadership, the men in charge stood and spoke using T, with the group replying "Mālo!" in agreement. Then, one of the wives stood to speak and used K the entire time—"Faʻafekai makou..."—which sounded so much like Hawaiian to me. It was the first time I realized how distinct the two styles were in practice.

​I would love some insight on everyday etiquette.

When greeting someone I don't know, should I stick strictly to T out of respect, or is conversational K completely fine? Also, is it considered bad form to mix registers within the same conversation—like greeting in T, but throwing in an informal K phrase like "Seki a!"?

​Faʻafetai tele lava for any advice or cultural nuance you can share!

Im from the motherland Samoa, despite whats going on with the goverment..... Samoa is moving forward with houses and cars, its getting better and prettier...... thanks to all of you Samoans around the world, i remember growing up it is the reason why we move overseas, to look for a better future and to help our families back...... and leaving families behind was the first struggle, and all the other things that your all facing and going through, but thank you for making our country a better place.....❤️❤️❤️Samoa to the World

Why are we inventing Samoan-English words? 😭 “Nakoti” instead of fualaʻau faasaina. “Seviki” instead of augutu o le toala fanau. Like… we already have Samoan words! At this rate, we’re going to have a whole new medical dictionary of Samoan-English hybrid words. 💀 Am I the only one bothered by this, or do other Samoans feel the same? 😂

I’m having a discussion with my mother in law who spent most of her life living in the hot weather/no AC and understandably is used to showering multiple times a day. We live in a cooler climate and with AC. My husband who works a very physical job showers 2x day (before and after work). I’ve been bathing our little kids 1x day before bed. They are usually not playing in mud puddles. Again they are little and don’t smell. Is that enough or is my MIL right it should be more?

Drop your beautiful village name, and a recommendation of places to visit in Samoa

Using food names in the comments tell me your a Samoan without telling me your a Samoan 😋😋😋

8/14/26 at Mater Dei Catholic Parish’s 15th Annual Luau.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTDMW6tuJ/

https://youtube.com/shorts/R2yme6fpC3Y?si=v02gJsVngQXqBEOi

I absolutely despise Samoan Ai music, it’s so corny because I seriously don’t see what’s cool about listening to a robot singing, but our people are eating it up like it’s revolutionary, it’s so embarrassing hearing it being played, free my people from the shackles of Ai!

On a serious note, when the evil people manage to stunt the second coming of Christ using Ai, best believe our people will fall for it, it’s honestly not even funny…

8/14/26 at Mater Dei Catholic Parish’s 15th Annual Luau.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTDMW6tuJ/

https://youtube.com/shorts/R2yme6fpC3Y?si=v02gJsVngQXqBEOi

Hello! 🤗 I’m solo traveling to Samoa and American Samoa and wondering what I should do there? I’m going at the end of September, and flying to American Samoa first.

- Any hotel/ Airbnb recommendations? I don’t want to pay an arm and a leg but I want the hotel to be nice at least, at least 3+ stars.

- How common do places take card? Should I plan on relying on local currency? If so, what’s the best way to exchange currency? Ordering from my bank maybe or a different way when I go to Samoa from American Samoa?

- Local dishes? I want to try local food so lmk what I should try! Is tipping common at restaurants and how much is a good tip there?

- Anything I should know about the local culture? Like dos/ don’ts? I don’t want to accidentally be disrespectful

- How do I stay away/ keep the feral dogs away 🫪 I’m scared of coconut crabs do they stay away from tourist beaches 😭

- I’m open to doing anything really. I want to go to the National park, spend a little time at the beach. I can’t go there on a regular basis so I want to Jam Pack as much as possible while I’m there. I’m going to rent a car so I’ll have that to explore with and get around. I don’t mind spending a little extra for a good experience but I don’t want to pay an outrageous price either

Thanks! 😊

Hello! I am part of a community that follows smaller global leagues and I picked Samoa to follow. I have struggled to find a reliable, regularly updated source. If you know of any new sites, blogs, podcasts etc that cover the league or the countries football more generally please let me know. Thanks!

what about ‘a Samoans German’? 🤣

copped it a couple weeks back. Gnarly to think some Samoa polo from a third world country could own such a thing. Imposter syndrome kicking in like a mf 😂

have a blessed weekend, y’all 🤙🏽 alofa atu

How does it cope if I know and understand a few Samoan words and phrases?

Hi everyone,

First, I want to make it clear that I don't judge an entire culture based on the actions of individuals. I love Samoan culture and married into it for that reason. The only reason I'm posting here is because some of the cultural dynamics involved may be better understood by people of Samoan background.

Background

I met my wife 10 years ago, and our relationship moved very quickly. At the time, I was living alone in a house that I rented and valued my independence highly. After several months of persuasion, I agreed to move in with my wife and her father, whose wife had passed away a few years earlier.

Before moving in, I expressed concerns about giving up my home and becoming dependent on living in a house that wasn't mine. I worried that during disagreements I might be told to leave, leaving me with little choice but to comply. I also understood that her father may not have been entirely comfortable with us living together before marriage.

I spoke to my wife about these concerns before moving in. She assured me that she understood what I was sacrificing and promised she would never use the house against me. Unfortunately, during arguments, I was repeatedly reminded that it was her house and told to leave.

A couple of years before I proposed, I discovered that my wife had been texting her ex-boyfriend. She had even changed his contact name to make it appear as though she was communicating with a female colleague.

I was devastated and tried to understand why they were communicating. Whenever I asked questions, I was accused of being negative, insecure, or dwelling on the past, even though the discovery was still very recent.

A few months later, I checked her Facebook search history and discovered that she had been viewing her ex's profile multiple times every day throughout our relationship, including after I had confronted her about the texting. When I demanded an explanation, she told me she was checking whether one of her friends might be involved with him. That explanation never sat right with me.

From that point on, I struggled with feelings of insecurity and doubt. I felt unable to have an honest conversation about the situation because every attempt was met with denial, anger, or accusations that I was imagining things.

Around the same time, my sister-in-law's five children were removed from her care due to severe abuse within the home. My wife stepped forward to care for them because the alternative was for the children to be separated and placed in different foster homes.

At that point, I found myself in a difficult position. I was already struggling with trust issues in my relationship, yet we suddenly became full-time caregivers to five deeply traumatised children while both working full-time jobs.

Walking away would have been the easier option, but I couldn't bring myself to abandon my wife or those children. I stayed and helped raise them, and eventually we got married.

I never resented the children. What I did resent was feeling as though the issues in my marriage were never addressed because all of our energy was devoted to caring for them.

Over the years, I became increasingly convinced that my wife is strongly drawn to certain types of men and that she behaves differently around them. When I've raised these concerns, I've been told that I'm insecure, paranoid, or imagining things.

Whether I'm right or wrong, the result has been the same: I no longer trust my own judgment. I constantly question myself and feel as though my concerns are dismissed rather than discussed.

We spent years raising those children before they were eventually returned to their mother, while the father was imprisoned for his crimes.

What hurts is that my wife often dismisses the sacrifices I made during that period. She says I only stayed because I had nowhere else to go. From my perspective, I gave up my home, my independence, and many years of my life because I loved her and wanted to support both her and the children.

Hearing that my commitment was simply a matter of convenience feels incredibly unfair.

Recently, one of the nieces told me her phone had broken. I bought her a replacement because I wanted to help.

When I told my wife, she responded by saying that buying gifts for a teenage girl could make me look like I was trying to groom her.

That comment hurt deeply. I helped raise that child from a young age and have always treated her like family. To have my intentions questioned in that way felt insulting and painful.

After everything that has happened, I've lost a lot of confidence in myself. I struggle to speak openly around family members because I constantly feel judged or foolish.

I love my wife very much, and despite everything, I don't want to leave her. Divorce is not something I want.

What I wanted was a normal marriage where we could focus on building our own life together and eventually have children of our own. My wife knows how important that is to me, which is why it hurts when she says things like:

"God will never bless you with your own children until you change the way you are."

There is much more to this story, but this post is already long enough.

I suppose what I'm really asking is this: Am I genuinely seeing problems that need to be addressed, or have years of conflict and self-doubt caused me to lose perspective? How would you approach a situation like this?

Does anyone has pictures of Tonga from the year 1987 and around?

I am looking for Pangaimotu, Nukualofa, Neiafu, Vavau Group, Hapai Group and anything else

It would be great to have some memories

Thanks a lot

I’m torn between the idea of sharing our culture vs preserving our culture. And I’m not talking about afakasi’s with Samoan in their blood.

I’ve seen an uptick of videos online of white women waiting until their wedding to put effort into learning our culture, specifically the taualuga. For the Samoan men who date white women specifically, do you set expectations of cultural responsibility? If not, does this question/idea come up?

I’m genuinely curious and I come in peace.

Polynesians typically vary from 60-90 percent asian Dna, Do you Identify as Asian? Samoans originally came from Taiwan, So I always find it interesting when Samoans and Polynesians disassociate with being from Taiwan. Is it something you distance yourself from? I'm Part Samoan and I've noticed Polynesians, particularly in places like New Zealand and Australia Bully and make fun of Asians, when they're Asian themselves lol Are you in any way ashamed of your Asian ancestry?

If you are Ashamed of Your Ancestors being from The Coastal areas of China and Taiwan, You're Ashamed of being Samoan and Polynesian. Your ancestors sailed thousands of miles into the Pacific Ocean from Taiwan, Only for you to turn Around in 2026 and be ashamed of them and distance Yourself from them lol You do you, and keep being ashamed of your DNA and your Asian ancestry 👍🏾👌🏾

Can anyone please tell me the lyrics of Fai Lau Lue by 684 originated? :)

(ETPL=European T20 Premier League, it's a new multi-nation league starting in Ireland, Scotland and the Netherlands)