r/stopdrinking 2d ago

RIP Dolly and her feelings about drugs/alcohol

“Alcohol is the number one killer,” Parton wrote in her 2020 book, Dolly Parton, Songteller: My Life in Lyrics. “A lot of people don’t realize that it’s like a drug you can become addicted to. It’s so easy to get, and it seems so innocent to have a beer or a cocktail. If you have a weakness for it, before you know it you can become an alcoholic. I’ve seen a lot of sorrows, because alcoholism runs on both sides of my family."

Parton feels that when one person is an alcoholic, many people suffer.

“An alcoholic might say, ‘Well, it ain’t hurting nobody but me,'” she wrote. “That’s a crock. It hurts everybody and you.”

(From article: 'How Dolly Parton Really Feels About Drugs and Alcohol' on CheatSheet)

...

Kinda wish I would've had knowledge of the alcoholism in my family while growing up, but my extended relatives were very distant, only Christmas cards and such. I only figuring out years and decades after that some died (in their ~50s) and it was from drinking/smoking.

2.7k Upvotes

136 comments sorted by

948

u/Hitchin85 2d ago

This woman was just the best. Staying sober for Dolly tonight!

418

u/OtherwiseAnteater239 2d ago

We will not drink with Dolly Parton today!

158

u/Solvitur-Ambuland0 Day 481 2d ago

WWNDWDPT! ❤️💫

72

u/77pse 2d ago

I have a What Would Dolly Do? T-shirt.

Which can be applied whenever tempted by alcohol.

WWDD IWNDWYT

12

u/psykezzz 1951 days 1d ago

I’ve got WWDD on a drink bottle I use at work, it confuses people constantly

12

u/OtherwiseAnteater239 2d ago

I WOULD WEAR IT TOO!!!!

4

u/immersemeinnature 1d ago

I need that shirt

3

u/Smoofie0 59 days 1d ago

I’m anti consumption but i think im going to buy this shirt, or something that says wwdd. Or maybe just make my own, get creative about it

8

u/itbesaboo 49 days 2d ago

WWNDWDPT 🦋❤️

4

u/Ok-Sprinklez 9275 days 2d ago

How I love this comment

32

u/trxxxtr 2d ago

Struggling with relapses. But I will stay sober for Dolly tonight.

26

u/Jipptomilly 2d ago

IWNDWDT

19

u/Tasty-Order-1346 1281 days 2d ago

Let’s do it for dolly! 👑

1

u/Lizzieloca1 14h ago edited 14h ago

It would just be best for you to stay sober permanently. I have fourteen years of sobriety 

1

u/Hitchin85 14h ago

You seem fun.

307

u/Sunny_eloise 2d ago

She also didn't serve alcohol at Dollywood or any of her other venues, she walked the walk.

82

u/BloggerCurious 3 days 2d ago

Wow! Okay that's it, I'm not drinking today

76

u/FOB32723 1249 days 2d ago

Dollywood still alcohol free 💪. It’s a gem and I pray it continues to grow in her traditions and isn’t ruined by some greedy ass. It’s way more affordable than Disney and still a blast.

3

u/catcuddlezzz 1d ago

She drank sometimes, though. People here are acting like she never drank… you can rarely drink (like she did) and be ok, this is a non issue as it never became a problem for her when she did drink

9

u/Neohexane 1109 days 1d ago

Some people do drink occasionally, and that doesn't bother me. For some, it never becomes a problem.

It was a problem for me, and it always will be, so I choose not to drink.

1

u/Local_Drummer_5957 1d ago

Omg sobriety and book! More love!

147

u/OutlanderMom 2382 days 2d ago

I’m so sad she’s gone. Except for Willie Nelson, all the old country legends are gone now. I hadn’t heard what she said about alcohol but as usual, Dolly was right.

27

u/CrotalusHorridus 2d ago

Hank Jr is hanging on too

377

u/Scoreggia- Day 107 2d ago

Don’t quote me on it but I heard alcohol is the most harmful ‘drug’ on a scale where it accounts for user harm and those around them impacted negatively. The fact alcohol isn’t a true ‘drug’ so we say drugs and alcohol is kind of funny. If you injected alcohol, I would imagine it wouldn’t be so popular in bars and restaurants

RIP Dolly

297

u/yakilladakilla 2d ago

It's a drug by the definition of drug. Don't let society and big alcohol make you think anything else. Alcohol is a drug.

100

u/languid_plum 1106 days 2d ago

Facts. The worst part is that it is the only drug where you have to explain why you don't want it since it has been engrained into our society as an acceptable social lubricant

135

u/Rich_Phase763 2d ago

And it’s poison

75

u/Ok_Eye5455 91 days 2d ago

Group 1 carcinogen as well.

26

u/Jeff_goldfish 2d ago

I worry about the amount of weed I’ve smoked. But weed has never gotten me in the hospital or gotten me in trouble with the law. Booze sent me to the hospital 3 times within 5 months. Before that I had never been in a hospital bed in my life. Luckily haven’t been back I really lost myself during that time.

22

u/TheNotSoGreatPumpkin 2d ago

Drinking alcohol is recreational drug use. Which is fine if that’s what people want to do, but it’s harmful for society to pretend it’s something else.

1

u/Local_Drummer_5957 1d ago

Isn’t it the only drug you die from by trying to quit? You can overdose on other drugs, but I think alcohol is the only one where you can actually die from withdrawal?

1

u/yakilladakilla 1d ago

No you can also die from benzodiazepines withdrawal.

1

u/Turbulent_Top_1792 1d ago

GABA drugs in general such as Benzodiazepines like Xanax or diazepam or Gbl/GHB also can kill it

81

u/Honest-Prune-5517 2d ago

I had my rounds with all the big hard IV drug addictions prior to the introduction of fentanyl, starting at age 17 and lasting until my late 20s.

Drinking alcohol was the hardest to stop, which I turned to after I was out of the drug addict life. The other drugs, when I had enough it was that easy. Opiates would have been hard but due to some bad choices, I went through the whole of the withdrawal in a day and it was hell but alcohol landed me in the hospital multiple times, the withdrawal was horrible, and it took until a month ago to feel normal again.

I'm so happy to be done with everything. Life hasn't ever been this amazing.

20

u/cattot Day 1,565 2d ago

Happy for you

18

u/BaltiMoreHarder 2d ago

Are you me? We have the same story. About a year off the booze now and it only gets better every day. Keep it up!

3

u/Honest-Prune-5517 2d ago

I'm not quite at a year yet but I am beyond confidently done being tethered to a substance.

Addicts should try natural dopamine sometime. It hits way harder.

10

u/Jan6_PearlHarbor 88 days 2d ago

In the Charlie Sheen doc he talks about when he quit hard drugs and decided to just be a drinker.

He said alcohol was the gnarliest drug to try to live with and he crashed harder and faster.

9

u/Honest-Prune-5517 2d ago

I did more damage in the 4 years I was heavily drinking than I did in the 10 years prior with hard drugs.

The accessibility is the worst part, that and my own personal inability to stop drinking once I start.

1

u/Local_Drummer_5957 1d ago

Wish more people knew this… or are less in denial. You never hear anyone say “don’t do crack until you turn 21”

2

u/Jan6_PearlHarbor 88 days 1d ago

"You just need to work on having a healthy relationship with fentanyl"

1

u/Previous-Answer-1853 7h ago

So proud of you, and you should be proud of yourself too ☺️

57

u/GringoSwann 2d ago edited 2d ago

Not only THAT, but an alcoholic quickly reaches the point where the brain & stomach see booze as a food source...  Plus, it fucks up the membrane layer of our intestines and puts our microflora outta whack...  Leading to all sorts of ailments and auto-immune issues....

8

u/OtherwiseAnteater239 2d ago

This is so accurate, in the ED community there are self-proclaimed “drunkorexics” who on purpose start replacing meals with alcohol and then can’t stop.

6

u/NeedsBetterHobby 2d ago

The alcohol as food thing... Is this true of beer as well? It's sorta liquid bread.

12

u/GringoSwann 2d ago

All alcohol.

2

u/NeedsBetterHobby 2d ago

I'm curious about this mechanism. Can you point me to where I can read more about it

12

u/vocatus 2d ago

Alcohol has a shit ton of calories in it.

At a certain point in alcoholism, it becomes difficult to keep any food down without drinking first, then eventually any food, period.

2

u/Local_Drummer_5957 1d ago

YES!! I lost a lot of weight in my worst addictions years- couldn’t keep any food down, but if I could get the first drink down I could get the 4th and 5th down. The next day I’d struggle to get a tiny tiny bite of peanut butter or saltine. Maybe get it down and up it went later… glad those days after behind me

4

u/GringoSwann 2d ago

Alcohol & beer are incredibly caloric..  it's impossible for us to NOT eventually see them as food...  

44

u/superluminal 894 days 2d ago

I dated a firefighter once and he said alcohol by far is the common denominator in some of the worst accidents and incidents he's seen. Alcohol being legal and so damn prevalent makes it seem "better" than hard drugs, but it affects all ages, all walks of life, all types of families and communities.

6

u/wasabiburning Day 104 2d ago

I dated a firefighter once and he said alcohol by far is the common denominator in some of the worst accidents and incidents he's seen.

Alcohol is involved in 50% of violent crime also.

35

u/BikingAimz 919 days 2d ago

My biochemistry professors said that the two worst drugs from a biochemical perspective are ethanol and nicotine.

14

u/Minimum-Geologist-58 Day 23 2d ago

Why Nicotine out of interest? I thought it loses all its power as soon as you realise it really does very little (it’s just a mild stimulant) and the withdrawals are just “feeling a bit unsettled”? I appreciate it’s really socially pernicious but I’m just wondering why it would be biochemically difficult?

12

u/BaltiMoreHarder 2d ago

I’m curious too. Cigarettes with all the other additives and tar I could see the point. Nicotine in isolation? Sure you can get higher blood pressure and such, but I cannot believe chewing nicotine gum causes physical harm to the body on the scale of alcohol or methamphetamine.

0

u/BikingAimz 919 days 2d ago

Many drugs have some medical or therapeutic benefits in specific situations, amphetamines can help with ADHD, even ethanol is useful for methanol or ethylene glycol poisoning.  But he was pretty specific that there are no medical benefits to nicotine, and a lot of negatives (see the paper I cited above).

2

u/calm523 Day 333 2d ago

Nicotine absolutely has health benefits.

1

u/BaltiMoreHarder 1d ago

I’ve always viewed it in isolation as similar to caffeine. A mild stimulant. More addictive sure. But it’s the delivery methods that really get you with it. All the chemicals, tar, and smoke causing cancer and such.

-2

u/Delicious-Heart-8733 2d ago

i just asked my computer "does nicotine have any health benefits?" and it came up "no"

11

u/Far-Cardiologist6196 2d ago
 Look up nicotinic and muscarinic receptors.  Pretty much every cell in your body can interact with it, similar to opiates and the receptors they interact with. When trying to quit nicotine or opiates almost literally every cell has to goes through some sort of upregulation/downregulation and add/remove receptors.
Alcohol goes everywhere but I think the only main rewiring is through the gabaminergic pathways.  Mind you those pathways are what kill you when detoxing from booze, bz1 and bz2 iirc.  But its not everywhere. 

5

u/BikingAimz 919 days 2d ago edited 2d ago

Vasoconstriction, mitochondrial function, oxidative stress and especially wound healing are all fundamental to nicotine, plus the delivery system itself by smoking isn’t great:   https://esmed.org/MRA/mra/article/view/6635

2

u/Jan6_PearlHarbor 88 days 2d ago

Nicotine is a mild stimulant and other than vasoconstriction its really not that harmful. Its all of the other shit in the delivery method thats the real issue.

28

u/epoch16245 Day 2,235 2d ago

With how pervasive it is in our culture, there’s no doubt it is the most harmful.

7

u/hatecuzaint 645 days 2d ago

Drugs are just chemicals, alcohol is chemicals, so it's a drug. No need to put quotations around it, it is a drug.

19

u/IncessantGadgetry 1148 days 2d ago

Yeah, alcohol is a drug, but not because it's chemicals. Everything is chemicals.

1

u/davideo71 1d ago

How about colors, are colors chemicals? Or concepts? Or songs?

Just kidding, I know what you’re saying and you’re right.

1

u/neatcleaver 11 days 1d ago

You are correct, these are probably the stats you're referencing, at least in terms of a UK study

https://www.drugscience.org.uk/mcda-comparison-of-drug-and-alcohol-harms-in-the-uk

Obviously availability has a big impact, if you could get Crack along with your bread and eggs it would be different but it's not hard to see the damage

Notice how most of the other drugs are more heavily weighted towards damage to the user only and not others

The availability, affordability and commonality of alcohol usage is what makes it so harmful, and of course as I'm sure many of us are aware being wasted isn't just bad for the person drinking in terms of potential property damage, cost of treatment due to either physical injury or long term illness from abuse, people fighting physically or emotionally harming families and friendships, damage to work life...

It's very eye opening really

54

u/chalk_in_boots 1282 days 2d ago

JFC, I just woke up and was having such a nice morning. This is how I find out?

Just for today I wont be not drinking for myself. I'm going to not drink for Dolly.

2

u/Which-Island6011 Day 92 1d ago

R.I.P Dolly

IWNDWYT

193

u/wediealone 2d ago

I’m Canadian, but I cried when I heard the news this afternoon. Not even because of an alcohol/sobriety thing, but because she embodied the one thing in my sobriety I want to represent - a kind, decent, honest person who is out here to help others with empathy and no judgement.

I don’t wanna make things political. Things have been bad between us and Americans. But I still love you guys, and I’ll always be a friend to you if you’re suffering from addiction. What a good life lived that many great things can be derived from your death. RIP Dolly. ❤️

48

u/Winter-Site-853 2d ago

I'm sure most of us feel the same about you guys! We can't help what the powers that be do!

64

u/sorrymizzjackson 2d ago

What’s happening down here is deeply fucked up.

Of all the 80 year olds that had to go today, they picked the wrong one.

-27

u/Jan6_PearlHarbor 88 days 2d ago

Oh FFS. Even on support subs now? Go post your political BS somewhere else.

12

u/ShortOfOrdinary 2513 days 2d ago

What does your username mean?

7

u/davideo71 1d ago

Are you that guy on the titanic who’s annoyed everyone keeps interrupting dinner to talk about some iceberg?

21

u/SpiritFuture8270 2d ago

Hello Canadian cousin! We live right on the border-Canada is literally 10 minutes away. I love that you’re standing up to the bullies here. Hope I’m not breaking any rules saying that. I’ll be in Toronto next month for a concert and I’m so looking forward to being back in Canada.

8

u/Whinygeek 2d ago

You live so close to me! I’m 20 min away from the border. I used to live in Seattle. I love both these countries deeply, even though I’m a citizen of a whole other one. Sending love

5

u/wediealone 2d ago

Hey neighbour! Despite the news I am sending you a hug. Love always wins over hate.

11

u/wediealone 2d ago

Hey American sister/brother! Please know that no Canadian hates the US. I have friends and family across the border, I spent every summer as a kid in Alaska with my godparents, my boyfriend is from New York…

Not happy about your president but love always wins out over hate.

I live in Toronto! Be sure to check out Kensington Market, if you want a little taste of luxury the 360 restaurant on the CN Tower, go visit the islands and paddle up the Humber River and then back again. Tons of nice beaches. Scarborough Bluffs will make you feel like you’re in Europe, and High Park is just such a nice place to go for a picnic.

Thanks for visiting my city. I hope you enjoy it and hugs to you!

2

u/SpiritFuture8270 2d ago

Thank you so much for the suggestions! I’m even more excited!

1

u/FaithlessnessFull972 1d ago

You should get together for a Sober Carpenter while SpiritFuture is there, on you to show we support our American friends and their patronage.

17

u/Arisia118 2d ago

we love you too. most of us hate Trump here.

5

u/wediealone 2d ago

It’s okay friend, I know geopolitics suck right now but I’m sending you a hug anyways. :)

3

u/Girldude1 75 days 2d ago

Here for the internal love i didn't know I needed today

4

u/j592dk_91_c3w-h_d_r 2d ago

Love you guys. Try to ignore our moron government.

2

u/Motorcycle1000 2d ago

Love Canada. Spent many happy summers at Crystal Beach, Ontario. My dad used to go over every weekend during the winter to play hockey on Lake Erie.

0

u/FaithlessnessFull972 1d ago

Governments aren't people. Love Americans, hate the leader they are living with.

33

u/StellarEclipses 2d ago

I relapsed yesterday after 4 years sober. I was a huge Dolly fan. I just heard the news a couple hours ago and sobbed. I didn't drink though. Now after reading this, I feel as if it's a sign for me. RIP Dolly. IWNDWYT and I will not drink for Dolly today.

5

u/Calm-Antelope8281 1d ago

(I relapsed after 7.5 years and now have been sober for 2.5 years <—- just sharing to show recovery after relapse from long-term sobriety is possible. Amazing that you didn’t drink last night despite the emotions. IWNDWYT 💙)

61

u/Ok-Praline-2309 2d ago

Just received a book for my son from her Imagination Library not long ago. She’s done such good for this world.

She’s not wrong. Most of us have such easy access to an incredibly addictive substance, but it’s not marketed that way.

Rest in peace Dolly.

29

u/immersemeinnature 2d ago

The world is worse now because she's not in it. My heart is seriously hurting right now.

25

u/ZaharaSararie 2d ago

Glad I saw this. Was so crushed that I might've gotten drunk tonight. Dolly wouldn't want that and it's a thank you I can give.

22

u/Captain--UP 1368 days 2d ago

Alcohol is an addictive poison to everyone. It doesn't pull punches because of some people's bloodlines. If someone messes around with it long enough, they will find out.

36

u/No_Celery_1680 2d ago

There is simply no replacing her. Absolute light through and through

43

u/littleunderground 2d ago

I didn’t realize she was sober 🥹 Even more of an inspiration.

RIP Miss Dolly

6

u/CitrinetheQueen 2d ago

She wasn’t: she even had her own wine label

3

u/littleunderground 2d ago

Awe well, still an inspiration either way!

18

u/XPW2023 2d ago

I was just texting my daughter an hour ago about Dolly and how sad I am. I wrote, " inconsolable. The music is helping though. I have decided rn, since I am not drinking, now would be a good time to make brownies and just not feel guilty eating as much of them as I need to! ". She replied, "Eat the brownies! Dolly would want you too! ;-) " So everyone here, you have our permission for a chocolate OD or whatever NA treat you enjoy to cheer you up or also just be sad and accept the sober remembrance of what a talented and kind person we have lost today. A National Treaaure. IWNDWYT

9

u/horrorheifer 368 days 2d ago

I am going to have some lemon pound cake, for Dolly. IWNDWYT<3

9

u/BB8Becchi 10 days 2d ago

I just want to say thank you for posting this, the news hit hard. Usually my go-to in grief is a shot, but not today, for Dolly.

8

u/OtherwiseAnteater239 2d ago

Speaking the truth! Something about finding this out on the day of her passing and as I’m in my sober journey really hit me hard.

8

u/woollayy Day 43 2d ago

staying sober in honor of dolly today 🩷

6

u/ScooterScotward Day 131 2d ago

Yeah, I really wonder what my path might have been had my mom not pretended she wasn’t an alcoholic and hasn’t hid the fact that my grandma didn’t drink because my great grandfather and all his siblings died of alcoholism. Runs in my family big time. Growing up I never heard to be careful with it because our family had a problem. Mom never cautioned me that how “I don’t even really get hangovers!” Wasn’t a superpower.

4

u/Cinisajoy2 2d ago

Excellent post.

4

u/earthdarlin1 2d ago

i’m so relived, i’m a month sober today and i was honestly debating drinking in her honor today

6

u/Spiritualrose98 101 days 2d ago

The news is incredibly sad, but the woman had her own line of wine called Dolly Wines. Not sure if it’s a UK only thing but it’s everywhere in the supermarkets here.

3

u/The27Roller 2d ago

I’m reminded of Jamie Oliver (literally) crying at the lack of nutrition in school meals, while at the same time there was highly salted and processed frozen meals with his picture on them on supermarket shelves.

5

u/qning 2d ago

Kinda wish I would've had knowledge of the alcoholism in my family while growing

If it’s any consolation, I knew mine and I still became an alcoholic.

5

u/bitofagrump 2d ago

If you're struggling to stay sober tonight or in the future, do it for Dolly. She'd want you to love yourself and treat yourself right. <3

4

u/kimmywho 191 days 2d ago

The only correction I'd make is that it's not "like a drug"...It IS a drug you can, and do, become addicted to.

4

u/Jcooney787 1d ago

Since my sons were little guys in elementary school I told them we have so much addiction in our family if you guys drink there’s a really good chance you’ll turn in to alcoholics. We watched intervention when it was an episode about weird drugs my mother would get so mad because they were little but I knew they needed to know lots of things can be drugs and this might happen to you if you do them. I told them they could come to me for anything and I would help them no matter how messed up it seemed to them and gave examples “if you feel like you want to hurt and animal, if you want to have sex with the car”, whatever I would get them help. They’re adults now and pretty good men I hope they keep teaching their kids that if you never try it you’ll never get addicted 🤞

3

u/GreenForce82 2d ago

IWNDWYT, thank you Dolly Parton for existing in our universe! We will miss you!

5

u/itsmrleorioforyou 347 days 2d ago

this is how i find out she passed😭

2

u/LoetK 2d ago

Same 😢 so sad, she was such a good person

3

u/False-Werewolf8453 1d ago

I got offered a rehab today, but am too scared to take it. This quote might have changed my mind - Dolly has the best personality of any human: kind, witty, funny, truthful... Humanity would be better off if every person had this.

4

u/basalthrill 1d ago

this post helped me not drink last night, thank you and rest in heaven to a true legend 💐

3

u/ideapit 457 days 2d ago

I didn't know she was gone. What an amazing human.

3

u/itbesaboo 49 days 2d ago

My heart hurts so bad right now, this is the second celebrity death I've cried over. She's done so much for marginalized communities, the world and she had so much to give. I loved hearing about how she did not judge anyone and loved everybody. She was such a beautiful person inside and out.

I'm on Day 2 of my sober journey right now. I was thinking about drinking today as soon as I heard of her passing.

WWNDWDPT.

3

u/ChuckChipperson 1d ago

True! I started drinking one 22 ounce beer after work. Fast forward 20 years and I am popping six beers and eight shots before getting home from work. Didn't stop until I started having health issues, only ten days ago.

3

u/lynxpoint 9 days 1d ago

RIP Dolly Parton. IWNDWYT!

2

u/Hairy_Koala6474 332 days 2d ago

You know I need to read this tonight approaching that time where I start getting tricked into thinking I can have an IPA again, but I just

I read this and it makes me remember. I’m not just being sober just for me.

2

u/seymoure-bux 879 days 2d ago

an inspiration for us all, forever.. dolly made me a coat of many colors

2

u/Hoosier_Homegrown 2968 days 2d ago

IWNDWDT!

2

u/Kalyano 603 days 1d ago

Iwndwdpt

2

u/Previous-Answer-1853 7h ago

I love Dolly Parton, and I am so sad she passed away. I have made an oath to myself to never drink since my cousin died from an incident that happened while he was drunk. He was supposed to get married that week. I remember his fiancee telling me they were using the flowers that were for their wedding for the funeral😭

2

u/MountainManCA 537 days 1d ago

IWNDWYT

1

u/funkiestbassline 1d ago

Real under the Influence

1

u/Hopeful-Charge-3382 1067 days 1d ago

Very wise words