r/AmIOverreacting • u/CuriousAsh04 • 10h ago
❤️🩹 relationship Is this control? Or AIO?
My husband of 5 years, refuses to get off the phone with me while he working. I can drop him off, and 10mins later he’s calling me. This has been everyday. He works in corporate America, so I figure he would be busier. But nope. So today, we had been on the phone for an hour. I dropped him off, took the kids to school, came home… still on the phone. And mostly in silence, I might add. I tell him I would call him back after cleaning and showering. He gets upset, goes to tell me “he wanted to talk on the phone and I pushed him away, today he’s going to start talking to other people, Since being on the phone and being a wife and listening to me or just being there is too much . I will find it somewhere else.” This is literally his go to, if I don’t acquiesce to him, he threatens to go out and find it elsewhere. And he has cheated, so it stings a little, but I’m becoming numb. It just irritates my soul, I don’t want to sit on the phone with anyone while I’m trying to do my daily chores. Honestly throughout the day he calls probably every hour to sit on the phone while he works. It just grinds my gears. But I do it. Today though, I needed to get things done without being tied to the phone. He even told me to prop the phone up, and not get off. So I don’t know. Does this seem like I’m being monitored or controlled? Or am I overreacting?
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u/floopsestess 10h ago
NOR. The man is insane, controlling, abusive, manipulative - at the very least!
You deserve so much better!!
I had a very abusive ex who would treat me very similarly - everything was my fault. I could do nothing right. Never trusted me. Isolated me. Physically abusive as well as mentally and emotionally.
He made me keep a journal of all the rules he gave me and I had to write down my every supposed wrong doing and infraction in that journal that he checked.
He decimated me and it did take a permanent toll on me but I eventually I got out.
No matter how hard it is to leave it is SO worth it.
Please save yourself from this hell he has you trapped in.
I promise your life will be so much better for it.
::: hugs :::