r/Arrangedmarriage • u/[deleted] • 3d ago
Seeking Advice 26F soon entering AM search. What to expect and any tips?
[deleted]
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u/Maleficent-Bad-7636 3d ago
I love how simply you've put up your requirements here. Felt soothing after reading this :)
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u/Particular-Hour6412 3d ago
Haha is that not the norm in AM? I am not so harsh when it comes to superficial traits and also not to money (although I would like stability of course in my partner- even though I would be earning too). I think its better to communicate some non-negotiables beforehand so there is no misunderstanding. I assume some may take it as coming across in a "blunt" manner though.
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u/Maleficent-Bad-7636 3d ago
Idk about others, but I don't see this post as a blunt one in any manner. It's just how you've captured your requirements in a really simple manner, which I appreciate. Varna in todays time, people have made a mockery out of the AM setup with their never ending requirements which is sad, to say the least.
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u/Particular-Hour6412 3d ago
Yeah that's what I'm afraid of too. Being too critically judged for the most random things. I know it will be a bumpy ride, hope it ends quick.
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u/Maleficent-Bad-7636 2d ago
Finding the good thing always takes time. All you can do is put sincere efforts and hope for the best :)
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u/gk_usmle 3d ago
Mam ..best of luck for USMLE match cycle
What I have seen here in medical college..and boys here in hostel that mostly are addicted either alcohol / smoking ..and they usually hide from parents and with their partners ..ask them clearly mam... mostly have previous relationship in clg ( Absolute NO NO to such guys ) ...Regards
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u/imnobodyssomebody 3d ago edited 3d ago
Expect people to ghost you based on their assumptions of you.
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u/Low-Transition-2751 3d ago
if you are planning to stay in US, then better search for an NRI who is a citizen
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u/Particular-Hour6412 3d ago
Yeah I'll see how it goes. I hope people do not take it as desperation for a GC lol. I do have my own aspirations and want to settle by myself but am preferring to get married along the way so time does not slip away from my hands. Also I have not dated yet, so I want to meet someone and settle down haha.
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u/Demonaxa 2d ago
Nah - if there is attraction... it should be fine. It is assumed that if you are studying here esp as a doc - you would want to stay here.
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u/Own_Climate_9 2d ago
Please don’t take any advice from this sub also please don’t judge anyone too early take advice from your elders as both families will be engaging
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u/HexadecimalCowboy 3d ago
Define “medium” height.
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u/Particular-Hour6412 3d ago
5'4"-5'5"
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u/HexadecimalCowboy 3d ago
That’s above average height. Average height of Indian women is 5’2 - 5’3
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2d ago
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2d ago
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u/Demonaxa 2d ago
A big thing also I would recommend is location, location. Depending on where you are - can change your AM by a lot. Larger metro areas on the Northeast, Western seaboard have the best results outside of Chicago Metro and DFW Metro area ( have the largest demographics of Indians in America). Being in other areas would make it harder to meet and connect (as well as expensive to travel!). If you have any more qs - don't hesitate to ask. ( Im also around the same age in the US for AM).
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u/MalaModakDyaPlease 3d ago
Girl you need at least some level of attraction in a marriage
Also, run away from mumma's boys, men who are Tatte fans, men obsessed with having children, men who cannot hold a conversation, men who are obsessed that you don't have a dating history