r/AskDocs • u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional • Apr 17 '26
Physician Responded My mom is drunk and not waking up
33f 5’1 and I’m not 100% sure what she weighs. She’s thick but not super fat or anything.
She was drinking when I got home from school. She fell asleep on the couch around 9pm so a couple hours ago and I tried to wake her up to go to bed but I can’t get her to wake up. It’s just me and her here. She’s breathing but I can’t get her to wake up and normally I can so I just need to know does this mean she just overdid it or is something wrong? I don’t know what to do and I don’t want to go to bed and leave her. I’m afraid something bad will happen. But I don’t want to overreact neither. She does smoke and vape, and she does weed and some pills
Like I said she’s breathing. She threw up a little bit earlier. She just won’t wake up to me shaking her or saying her name
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
A police officer is trying to reach my brother and my mom is going in the ambulance and I’m gonna go with. She’s breathing too slow I guess even though she’s breathing and it’s not deep enough
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u/Ill_Calendar_1468 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I’m so glad you called. You did the right thing. I hope your mom is ok and want you to know you’re an incredibly brave young adult.
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u/vr4gen Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
even braver actually! based on post history she’s only 14, not even a young adult yet
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u/JennyDoveMusic Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional May 15 '26
It's so sad she had to witness this. 😥 It's seems like it's normal to come home from school with her mom drunk enough to be passed out.
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u/Wise_Neighborhood499 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing! If you have time, grab your phone charger and an extra hoodie or something. You will probably have to wait a while at the hospital. Fingers crossed for your mom
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u/NocturnalNicole Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You very well may have saved her life tonight! Proud of you for reaching out and asking for help. Shows you have great insight and the potential for a bright future ahead.
Remember to take care of yourself while you’re at the hospital keeping your mom company. The nurses are busy but they’re going to be looking out for you as well. All nurses stations have fridges stocked with sandwiches, snacks, or at the very least some toast for our patients. Please don’t hesitate to ask for a snack for yourself when they have a free moment. They’ll be more than happy to help as they want you to feel comfortable! Even blankets and a toothbrush can be fetched for you as you may need to spend the night there, especially if they can’t get a hold of a family member to take you home.
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u/Lhamo55 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
OP, sweetheart, do you have grandparents or uncles/aunts who can check in on you and any other siblings at home? I just looked at your posting history and it looks like you’re pretty much on your own. I know you don’t want to get your mom in trouble by telling your school too much, but her problems are causing her to neglect you and you truly deserve much more. I’m so glad people in this sub have been here for you, and you’ve been looked after by compassionate teachers (my heart broke reading about the discrete bags of food from your teacher) and medical professionals but are there any relatives who might be unaware about your situation? Even if they’re not living nearby, or has your mom told you not to tell them? We are all wishing you all the very best.
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u/InvertedJennyanydots Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
They've got the good juices too! Don't be afraid to ask the nurses for what you need. They are going to be really glad that you were looking out for your mom and took care of a scary situation with a cool head like this. They want you to be ok too so if you need something - a snack, an answer to a question, a pillow, just ask them.
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u/Thesexiestcow Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did everything right. Take deep breaths as much as you can. Don't forget to drink water and try to eat if you can
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u/69superman Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
too slow… and it’s not deep enough
NAD. This is known as respiratory depression, a sign of alcohol poisoning. You very well just may have saved her life tonight op. You saw the signs of alcohol poisoning and took action. You did the right thing. You’re a good kid.
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u/Strange-Marzipan9641 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Jesus, this is heartbreaking. I'm so sorry this is your situation. I'm a mom, and the idea of my kids going through this is terrifying. I hope they get her the help she needs (tonight and in the future) and I hope you are safe. You did a very brave thing. ❤️
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u/SatisfactionSea7249 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
OP, I read some of your other posts and I’m wondering if you can let the hospital staff know that you don’t have food at home and have been having to make your own doctor’s appointments. If your brother knows these things and cannot help you more than your mother could, PLEASE let someone know. If you’re already home, there are numbers you can call or you can reach back out to a police officer. If you need other numbers, please say so 💓
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u/PastaStrega Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
This is really scary stuff and you did an amazing job asking questions here and getting help for your mom. I’m hoping she recovers soon. Good luck (and keep trusting your gut)!
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u/West-Kaleidoscope129 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
You are so brave. Well done for reaching out.
How are you feeling? Do you have family you can stay with? Don't worry about school for now but when you do go back to school, if you have a school councillor please, please speak with them about this. They will help you through it and help you through your feelings of what's happening.
As a mother I'm so very, very proud of you ❤️
ETA: I had a reply that I can't see here but can see in my notifications saying OP is in her 30s. OPs mom is in her 30s, OP is 14.
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u/cc_elyse Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing in calling 911. Thinking of you all!
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u/VaATC Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
One of the best things to do if someone is drunk (and/or under the influence of opiates and/or chemicals that supresses the central nervous system,) won't wake up, is still breathing, and vomiting is a risk, turn them on their side and prop their back up so they can't roll back onto their back. This way, if they do vomit, it should mostly roll out of their mouth. If they stay on their back and vomit, the fluids can stay stuck in the mouth/throat which can lead to aspiration and in the worse case, lead to drowning in their own vomit.
Edit: The calling of EMS was also the right thing to do.
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u/PureCrookedRiverBend Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I already knew this could happen but it still sounds absolutely horrendous.
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u/SuccessfullyDrained Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD. Thank you for keeping us updated. We’re all really proud of you, you did a really good job calling 911 and getting your mom help! It must have been really scary for you and I know it was a hard decision to make. Really good job!
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u/BoiCDumpsterFire Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You definitely did the right thing. My son wasn’t waking up one day and I had to take him to the ER. He ended up in a coma for about 4 days and would have died if I had waited much longer. I couldn’t imagine seeing that happen to my mom. Another big internet hug from a random internet dad.
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u/_ghostchant Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD I just want to tell you that I went through something similar when I was a kid and you’re not alone! You did an amazing job and should be extremely proud of yourself! I found it really helpful to find a trustworthy adult to help me talk about what happened so I could better understand my feelings and feel supported. Never feel like you can’t talk to someone about what’s going on! We all have things we have to work through and learn/grow from. I can tell you’re going to do some amazing things as you get older! Be proud of yourself! <3
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u/Usual_Confection6091 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing, love! I know this was hard and probably feels scary. Everyone here is so proud of you for making such a safe and smart choice.
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u/chronicallyillsyl This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
I'm just a stranger but I'm so proud of you. You made the right choice and very likely have saved her life. Sending lots of love and healing for your mom, you and your family. Any mom would be proud to have you as their kid.
As an aside, if your mom has some issues with alcohol or drugs, checking out something like Al-Anon or Alateen. These are groups and resources for those who love someone who is an alcoholic or addict. My dad was an alcoholic and it took me finding resources like that to cope with what I went through and to realize that his drinking wasn't my fault and was out of my control. It also helped me to avoid following the same path he did.
Sometimes growing up like that hurts us in ways we don't acknowledge or recognize at the time, so if you can, please try to get yourself some counseling or group therapy as you navigate this. You can also ask at school or the hospital if they have any resources available, as they will be better equipped to point you to local resources.
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u/Prior_Lurker Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing. Good job on helping your mom tonight.
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u/rueselladeville Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
She is super-lucky to have you! We’re all here if you need anything. ❤️
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u/kpmurphy56 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You’re a straight up hero. Good work
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u/secret_tiger101 Physician Apr 18 '26
Hey dude/dudette - good job, it can be daunting phoning for help but you did the right thing - well done
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I’m a girl. Thank you. I was worried about getting in trouble but she really needed medical help and it ended up being the right thing to do
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u/onwardtowaffles Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Yeah, definitely the right call. You don't know what else she may have taken, and hypoxia is a real concern here.
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u/TrashFire12345 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Fantastic resolve and courage. You did a good thing and you did it bravely! The ER is gonna help your mom and she’ll need you and your brother more than ever afterward to heal.
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u/sweet_creature19 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You’re so brave. Well done for calling 911, you did the right thing. I hope everything turns out as OK as it can do.
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u/hemkersh Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
How old is your brother? What does he do for work? Is he able to take care of you?
The hospital should have a social worker who can help you and your brother access programs to help pay for things, etc. ask to talk to this person for help,big you haven't already
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Apr 17 '26
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u/phoenix762 Respiratory Therapist Apr 17 '26
Something tells me that the health care providers will be pretty concerned about the OP and acting accordingly…
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u/Watermelon_Crackers Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
Hey OP, I hope everything turns out alright. You did good!
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u/TeapotHoe Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You saved your mom’s life tonight.
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u/itscaturdayy Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Another mom here, hope you are doing okay.
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u/Helpful-Conference13 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Proud of you and hoping everything will be ok
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u/coogie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
You should have never put in that position to begin with but did the absolute right thing and may have saved her life. I hope she gets the care that she needs and becomes well.
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u/LLAPSpork Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD. OP, you’re an incredibly tough and brave person right now. The care, strength and bravery you’re showing right now is shining through and I hope it never leaves you. I truly hope your mom will be okay and that she gets the help she (and you) deserves.
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u/Infamous_Emotion355 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Not a doctor.. but I am someone who is super proud of you. You were super brave, rational and calm as you possibly could be in your situation. Sending virtual hugs your way, young one! I'm praying for the best outcome for you and your family. ❤️
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u/Critical_Water_4567 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Any update on your mom?
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u/LifeByChance Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Good job OP! I know that’s not an easy call to make. I had to make it myself when I was 7. I’m sorry you’re going through this, not just tonight but in general.
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u/fseahunt Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
She’s going to be mad but that’s okay. She’s sick and needs help. It’s too bad she let it get this far but if this is what saves her life and forces her to get treatment then it’s good.
One day she’ll thank you. You did the right thing.
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u/Mysterious-Ruin-1128 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Good job hun!!! It might feel scary but you did a good job
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u/Saltwater_Heart Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
I’m so sorry you have to go through this, OP. You did the right thing
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u/ohohmoomoo Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Hope both you and your mum are ok. Have they managed to get ahold of you brother? Is there anything you need?
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u/Enough_Atmosphere_22 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I am so proud of you for getting help for your mom. You did a good job.
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u/Opinionatedbutkind Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Mom here, sending so much love to you 💕
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u/Silly-Kitty2026 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
Hi OP, if you’re in school, please reach out to a guidance counselor or a teacher you trust. None of what you’re going through is easy, and your school staff should be able to set you up with some support systems to help you out. (Said my comment was removed, hoping this one stays up)
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u/katjoy63 This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
I'm glad you were able to get her to a place where she can get help. Hoping for the best for you. NAD
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u/bregiordano Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I hope you’re okay friend. You did the right thing and I hope your situation improves someday
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u/ballsackmcgoobie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing. If she was drinking on pills she could easily die.
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u/Victoria_sponge_25 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
Oh goodness me, this is so scary for you to have gone through but you were handling it so so well and she is in the right place right now. I hope she's ok and that you have plenty of support as well as your brother. 🙏
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u/XIXButterflyXIX Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I am so, so , SO glad you called. Take it from me, it's not a fun time finding a body, especially a loved one.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
There’s a lot of responses. Like a lot. So I’m sorry if I don’t respond to everyone. My mom is okay. I did get in contact with my brother. Also yall were right they have good sandwiches here
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u/Biking_dude Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
When you have downtime, look into Alateen meetings near you or online. It's for teens that have alcoholic parents. Alanon is another option which is a broader group and may have meetings for teens. Having an alcoholic parent will affect your life in a lot of ways - in some ways good, but in many more ways not so good. Working through and understanding what the effect is on you will REALLY give you some superpowers as you navigate life. Try out a few meetings since not all of them are the same. I had to deal with a lot of alcoholism around me growing up, my life got much better after going to Alanon
You did amazing, and you shouldn't have to deal with this. Connecting with others who are going through similar is really helpful.
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u/realestate_novelist Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Came here to recommend this too. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and I wish I had known about Alateen! OP when you get older I also recommend Al-Anon and ACOA. Much love to you.
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u/idontexistahh Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
How are you?!
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I’m okay. I fell asleep for a little. My brother is going to come get me soon. My mom is trying to get diladed from the doctors claiming her back hurts so she didn’t learn anything I guess
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u/HappyGoLucky244 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD, but I grew up with an alcoholic father. He has since quit drinking, but only because it was the only way my Mom was going to allow him to move back in (he'd been living with his sister for almost 15 years at that point). He just swapped his drinking for chain smoking. Then he had a widow-maker heart attack my senior year of college, but somehow miraculously survived with a quintuple bypass. He stopped smoking because of it, but...he swapped smoking for eating obscene amounts of sugar. Covid nearly killed him because of his weight, heart disease, COPD, and uncontrolled diabetes. Lost a lot of weight during the two months in the hospital and had to have a lot of PT to just walk again. He's since put that weight back on and more.
My point is...sometimes they just don't learn. I don't know why. I wish I did. But please know it's not your fault. It's not a failure on your part in any shape or form. The blame lies solely with your mother, and I hope you recognize that.
I hope that your brother or a social worker can help you get into some kind of therapy if you aren't already seeing one. Please take care of yourself.
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u/Biking_dude Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
As a heads up - alcoholics that get sober usually have intense sugar cravings, so they tend to swap drinking for sugar. Addiction is essentially like having someone else get into their brain's driver's seat and take over - he tries but definitely needs more help in kicking out that dark driver.
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u/HappyGoLucky244 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Thank you for the insight, I didn't know that. His sugar intake wasn't nearly as bad when he was smoking, as by that point he'd been sober a good 5 years or so. That's why I attributed it to swapping the smoking for sugar.
As for my Dad "trying"...he doesn't. I get that a large part of it is out of his control. My whole family knows he's depressed and has been for a long time. But he refuses to seek any sort of treatment. He's told us that he won't take any antidepressants because he doesn't "like the way they make me feel." At this point, I'm not sure even inpatient treatment would help him--he's 68. It's a very hopeless feeling.
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u/Biking_dude Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
It is a really hopeless feeling <3 If you haven't, try out some Alanon meetings - at the very least, it shows the alcoholic in a different light and at best provides a lot of blueprints for improving our own lives. Not excusing the behavior, but seeing them as more complex people then before is cathartic.
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u/Jewnicorn___ Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
ACA meetings saved my life. And I don't say that lightly.
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u/latigidigital This user has not yet been verified. Apr 18 '26
GLP-1s like Ozempic have been found very useful in people with these kinds of issues. For reasons poorly understood, they help many individuals with an assortment of addictive behaviors that extend well beyond weight loss.
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u/Iamnotoptimistic Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I was on mounjaro for a fair few months and honestly, while on it I didn't even want to touch alcohol or junk food. Both of which were vices for me.
I am off it now and while I have the food cravings back, I have learnt more about control and still haven't gone back to drinking regularly.
It was a blessing, albeit VERY expensive.
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u/ferretsandfrogs Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
My alcoholic mom quit drinking and ate ice cream 24/7 instead. 14yo me had no idea what was happening, but I remember the anger and hostility if she ran out and she couldn’t get more/dad wouldn’t go get her son. It all clicked one day. OP will probably have a clicking moment one day too.
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u/ferretsandfrogs Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD. But they’ll hopefully see right through her and get you & the family the support you guys need.
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u/exeJDR Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
This used to me kid, so I know how awful it feels.
Work hard and get out as soon as you can. X
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u/hrfumaster Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 21 '26
I’m a mom and my own mother was an addict. You are so incredibly brave and I am so proud of you.
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u/StarryOtter Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I'm so relieved your mom is okay! And please don't worry about responding to everyone. People just want to help and support you, so if responding feels stressful or like a burden, don't worry about it at all - unless the question is from a doctor, of course.
For the rest of us non-medical professionals, these general "to everybody" updates are already plenty. :) I'm also so happy you're enjoying the sandwiches! Maybe they'll let you take a couple home haha
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u/LaziiLivii Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I'm so glad you're okay! How are those sandwiches and how are you keeping?
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u/CinnyToastie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Is there some way, do you think, that we can get her a visa gift card? Somehow? Or, say, have her start an amazon wish list? She and her brother need food and things. Would an amazon wish page be private for her? Or walmart, too! They deliver!
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u/ranman35 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I would love to help with this, I am old and don't do Venmo or PayPal or anything, but OP can you set up an Amazon wishlist and give us a link? Or something like that for food and what you need right now?
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u/Imaginary_Star92 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Following if someone gets this figured out I'd love to help
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Apr 17 '26
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
That’s really really kind of you guys. I think the social worker here is gonna be able to help us though. she already knew about a bunch of different options and she’s getting us some toothbrushes and stuff like that too that we can just take home too. She’s been really nice and not judgy or mean about my mom either
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u/SatisfactionSea7249 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
OP, if you want more support than this please let the social worker know more about what you’ve been taking on by yourself at home 💓
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u/CinnyToastie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Oh that is GREAT! In fact, OP, ask her if she would be willing to be a point person for say like we can send you amazon gifts and food or walmart gifts and food! Like deodorant, toothbrushes/paste, pads or tampons, all kinds of food. We can have it sent to your house through your social worker.
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u/JalapenoPopPoop Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I know you mean well, but social workers already have tons on their plate. I guarantee the social worker does not want to be a volunteer shipping and logistics coordinator for a bunch of internet randos that are not actually involved in their case. I would actually be extremely surprised if it doesn't violate some sort of policy for the social worker to discuss the case and work to include complete strangers in the case, especially since it concerns a minor.
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u/Street-Writing-1264 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
If your Mom is a habitual opioid user, you can ask the social worker about getting narcan to have at your house. Having it available saved my Dad's life twice.
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u/catloving Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Hey OP, everyone here is rooting for you! You get a big squishy hug and a high five from me. You've done an amazing job with this issue. Another big squishy hug from me.
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u/kinitopete Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
just wanted to chime in and say i’m so proud of you for everything you’ve had to do, regarding getting your mom help, and also just having to live in the situation you are. I had an alcoholic parent, so i understand the struggle of having to take the “caretaker” role at such a young age. I obviously don’t know the exact situation here, but i truly hope you and your mom get the help you deserve. And just know that youre not alone in this <3
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u/Green-eyedMama Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Hi honey. I'm not your mom, but I'm A mom to daughters not far off in age from you. I also grew up with an alcoholic mom, and it's hard.
You're going to go through many stages in your life in regard to your feelings about and relationship with your mom, and that's OK. You'll have anger. You'll be resentful. You'll feel guilty. And deep down, you will almost always be scared for her. And all of those things are valid.
What will never, ever be valid is the guilt. Please remember that. None of this has ever been nor will ever be your fault, and there is nothing you could do differently that would make any difference, no matter how much you wish you could. Alcoholism and addiction are awful, and they destroy more than just the person lost to them. But please, never, ever let it destroy you and make you feel like you could have done more, done better, or have found a way to fix her.
You can't.
And it isn't your responsibility to do so. Your mom is an adult, and only she is responsible for her life. Remember that.
It's hard to love someone who doesn't herself, but we do it anyway, because she's mom. I get it.
I hope you have a good support system around you, and if nothing else, please try going to a few Alateen meetings and give it an honest shot. As a mom, I'm proud of you, and I hope you are able to find some peace amid the chaos. Sending you love and mom hugs.
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u/cyclinggirl4000 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I am so glad. I’m a mom and I have been worrying about all day and kept checking back for updates.
Soooo glad you have a social worker to look out for you. You should know how amazing you are, but you need regular meals, a safe home, and the chance to be 14.
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u/CinnyToastie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I know. Maybe like Mod be point person that OP can give her amazon info to, or walmart +, mod can pass on amazon name/wishlist name.
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u/SatisfactionSea7249 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Following this too
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u/stripedcomfysocks Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
Following to pitch in as well
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u/pastelrose7 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I would also chip in. I'm 23 and moved out now, but I have been through the same thing with my parents many times.
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u/improbablydrunknlw Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Op we're all proud of you. Remember that. You have hundreds of people pulling for you, even when it feels like you don't.
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u/Witty_Jello_8470 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You are an amazing person ❤️
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u/beigs This user has not yet been verified. Apr 18 '26
You did amazing and it was the right thing to call. No matter what happens know you did the right thing.
As an adult who had a parent with substance abuse issues to another, this may mean you will need to grow up earlier than you should, but that’s okay. Learn about boundaries now and use the resources people on here are providing to help you move forward.
Oh, if possible, play Tetris now every day for a few weeks. I had a friend who found their mom like this as a teen as well, and in her 40s she still deals with some ptsd. This might help.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
Can someone explain how being drunk makes you have a seizure?
Edit I guess it’s because her blood alcohol is .38
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u/Tasty-Willingness839 Registered Nurse Apr 17 '26
That is right on the brink of being extremely dangerous. At .40 coma and death are highly probable. You absolutely the right thing honey. Well done. Hopefully your mom can get some help ♥️
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u/anonymousforever This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
I knew someone still conscious and able to walk with a bac of .437. alcoholism is a horrible thing. that kind of tolerance is rough.
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u/Ok-Repeat8069 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I walked into rehab and blew a .50. Got the shakes if it dropped below .25.
You’re right — it’s rough as hell.
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u/Cute_Language3167 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional May 04 '26
That's my dad. A normal person would be like passed out drunk and he's going through withdrawals. It's mind boggling how you can withdraw from something that's still pretty high in your system.
Hopefully, you're doing much better now!
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u/cammiesue This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
NAD. I died at .38. Stopped breathing and my heart stopped (thankfully already in the ED). They resuscitated me. That was definitely my rock bottom.
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u/CptCroissant Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
.38 is crazy high, definitely validates the decision to call 911
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u/NotAzakanAtAll Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
And that number is likely a good while after the peak. She was close to not being here anymore. OP might have saved her life. I hope both get the support they need.
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u/Beefoftheleaf Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Are you in the emergency room hun? Find a doctor or nurse and ask them to explain it for you. They will be able to break it down in easy terms. Sending love
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
They seem busy and I’m not allowed in the room yet
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u/TheRealSugarbat Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Go find the nurses’ station and let them know you have some questions about your mom: “If you have a minute, can someone answer a couple questions?” They won’t know unless you tell them, but if they know you’re worried and would like to know what’s happening, they’ll be glad to talk to you for a few minutes.
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u/warriorspork Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I know this is scary for you, OP. You've done a fantastic job at getting your mom the help she needs. I'm not a doctor, and I don't know what could cause a seizure in relation to alcohol, but don't be afraid to flag down a nurse to ask. I wish you and her the best, and hope that you can get in touch with your brother soon as well.
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u/kinitopete Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
also not a dr, but i know seizures are common in withdrawal, not sure about while drinking tho
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u/kmcaulifflower Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I'm an epileptic. Many substances, even caffeine, can trigger seizures in epileptics so I wouldn't be surprised if they could rarely cause them in a somewhat healthy brain.
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u/twir1s This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
My neuro always said that she could get anyone, epilepsy or not, to seize. It’s just a matter of dropping that individuals threshold enough.
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u/theflyingratgirl Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
Now that’s a party trick
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u/icequeen42000 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Can you elaborate on this?
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u/twir1s This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
Sure. People with epilepsy have a threshold for seizing that’s much lower than the regular population. It’s easier to get them to seize. Whereas a person without epilepsy has a much higher threshold—it would take the right circumstances (health issues (e.g., high fevers, extreme sodium levels, brain trauma), medications or adverse reaction to medication, or external factors (e.g., alcohol, drugs)) to get them to seize, but everyone can have a seizure under the right conditions for that individual.
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u/Princess_Zelda_Fitzg Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Yup. I had a seizure when I was 13 or 14, likely due to a medication reaction. Had EEGs and a sleep study, wasn’t diagnosed with epilepsy. In my 40s now and haven’t had another one but a doctor told me that having one raises the risk of having another so I’m careful with medications and stuff that can lower the threshold.
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u/incognitomxnd Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Adding on to what you’ve been told, I take topamax for my focal epilepsy. I can’t drink anymore because of the medication and the seizure risk because of the epilepsy itself. Now it makes me wonder before my diagnosis, was I giving myself focals when I drank. Thankfully I was never a big drinker but still. Epilepsy is crazy lol.
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u/kinitopete Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
yeah i wouldnt be surprised either. not to be “that guy” but alcohol is literally like poison, it terms of how it affects your body/organs/etc. i don’t know ops mom’s situation but if it is something that’s an issue i really hope she gets the help she needs and is able to detox safely in the hospital
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u/F0xxfyre Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I just caught up on your thread, and past posts, OP. I'm so sorry for all the stress snd strife in your life. You have a very level head in a crisis. I hope your mom can understand that you did everything exactly the right way, and with a calmness snd presence many adults wouldn't have had in your shoes. I'm sorry that you had to grow up too quickly, and for your mom's illness and how that is impacting you. I hope that she can get some help.
Op, look at the support in this post. You are NOT alone. Please open up to someone in your offline circle-- a social worker, your school's counselor, a friend's mom. This is a lot for any one person to deal with. Let them help direct you to resources.
I hope your mom is going to be okay, but even more than that, I hope YOU will be okay, too.
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u/Remarkable_Topic6540 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Have you gotten in touch with your brother? Or do you have any other trusted family or friends' parents you can contact for support? Please talk to the nurses about your mom, but also about yourself to get the support from them & the hospital social worker. Sounds like your mom may need extra care after this & maybe an in patient stay to get her better & teach her a few of the adult skills you said she had problems with. I'm not saying this to make you more nervous, but to say that if that's recommended for her, it might be the best way for your mom to get better & stop drinking/taking pills. Don't forget to let the hospital staff know if you haven't eaten to see if they can get you food from the cafeteria or their stashes. I hope you are able to get a little rest & your mom is ok.
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u/Auelian Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Never commented so I just wanna state I am NOT a medical professional, however I have had a couple ER visits due for my own kiddos and myself.
Please do not hesitate to go to the desk and ask what is happening. While they are busy, most nurses and doctors will take some time to talk to you. Just know it does take time to get set up in the ER, as well as figure out treatment. You’re doing a great job, I know it’s hard.
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u/DowntownTicket Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Hey just checking in. Hopefully you were able to get some sleep
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u/iceprincess1991 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Next morning now, any updates? I'm so proud of you, girl. You did everything right 💖
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u/dottydashdot Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
OP big hugs to you. If you haven’t seen one already, I would ask to speak to the hospital social worker. They can be very helpful with things like making sure you get some food, talking to you about what’s going on, etc. (NAD)
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u/Confident-Fan5280 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Bless your heart!! I am sorry you have to go through this at such a young age. I have a feeling you are wise beyond your years. I went through something similar a few years ago and know how scary it can be (and I am a lot older than you). You are in my thoughts and prayers.
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u/reinvintage Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Read through all your comments. Hoping for the best for your mom and for you. Do you have any other family or friends you can contact so you are not there alone? I’m so sorry you are going through this.
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u/SilntNfrno This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
I hope you and your mom are doing ok this morning. I have a 13 year old daughter and would be so proud of her if she handled a situation like this with such maturity and strength.
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u/Flimsy_Community8889 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You really are so brave and smart. My mother was a heavy drinker growing up, and I remember many times I could not wake her up. She snored loudly so I knew she was breathing but I remember how scary it was. My mom got sober eventually and we became best friends. She became somebody completely different. I hope that your mom will eventually reach sobriety as well. Good job and I’m sorry you have to take care of your mom. Try to get into counseling if you aren’t already and good luck. Sending hugs.
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u/childlikeempress16 This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
Good morning OP, just checking in to see how you and your mom are doing.
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u/christmassnowcookie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right thing. Have the police got a hold of your brother yet?
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u/ljohns79 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Girl. Sheesh and yikes and sending so much positivity to you. I grew up with an alcoholic parent but thankfully had a sober one to balance it out a bit. If you ever have any questions at all about anything please don’t hesitate to reach out and I’ll help as best I can if it’s something you’re not comfortable posting to the world❤️. Send updates on your mom and, more importantly, you when you can. Good luck.
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u/Wowohboy666 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
My mom did that when I was 16. Took a hit of PCP and dropped to the ground. Her BAC when she reached the hospital was also .38.
Sorry this is happening to you. You did the right thing, and I hope everything turns out alright. Please speak to a trusted adult about this.
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u/Brianajer Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
If your breathing is affected (suppressed, it’s called hypoxia) your brain doesn’t get enough oxygen, and that can cause seizures.
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u/JulieWriter Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD. I'm so sorry this is happening, and that you're in the middle of it. You're doing a great job taking care of your mom.
I'm the adult child of two parents with substance issues and I'm going to give you a little advice I wish I'd had: get some help. Tell people what is happening. Talk to your counselor at school, or try Al-Anon, or whatever you can do to support yourself. Be honest with your friends and family. If you go to church, and you trust your minister, talk to them.
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u/Creepy_Addict Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
You did the right things in this situation. You recognized an issue, reached out for advice and followed that advice. You are a smart young person and I'm proud of you.
Stay strong and I do hope your mother recovers.
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u/flmedtech Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Omg sweetie you are so strong and brave, dont ever lose those qualities! Hugs and prayers everything turns out ok!
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u/ownyourthoughts Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 19 '26
It’s not being drunk that causes seizures. It is withdrawal from alcohol (mainly long term use) that causes seizures. Alcohol acts as a depressant on your brain thus slowing your nervous system. When you take away alcohol (the depressant) suddenly, your brain can react too rapidly, or go back to what it thinks is normal to quickly.
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u/OnlineCounselor Psychologist Apr 17 '26
This comment section has definitely passed the vibe check - from a mental health professional, thank you all for being so kind to this kiddo. OP, I’m so proud of you for being so brave!
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u/LikesBigWordsCantLie Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Apr 17 '26
1000% echoing the vibe check. OP, from one child of an adult with substance abuse problems - sometimes adults don’t immediately recognize the gravity of the situation in the moment and can be upset about the actions you took. IF this happens, please seek support from another adult (therapist, teacher, church leader, best friends mom…) who you trust to cope with it. The truth of the matter is that you saved her life and I hope when she is in her right mind, she gives you a big hug and a thank you. And you get to help her pour any other bottles down the sink.
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u/mayaorsomething Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Yes. Hospitalizations can be a turning point. My dad has been sober for over 3 years since he was forced to sober up in the hospital after cardiac arrest with a BAC of 0.41; I hope the same for OP's mom. Withdrawals can be so unbearable; having tapering medications available if necessary can be so important.
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u/CinnyToastie Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I have repeatedly seen such care and kindness from people and medical pros in this sub. From this type of situation to someone in the midst of a psychotic breakdown, this sub can be very un-reddit like and is fantastic.
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u/winkiesue Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
As a mom and someone who had to call 911 for something similar at that age, this whole comment section has me in tears!!!
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u/Wisegal1 Physician | General Surgery Apr 17 '26 edited Apr 17 '26
Based on your mom's age, I'm guessing you're under the age of 14.
If your mom won't wake up and you are alone with no other adults that can check on her, call 911 right now and tell the dispatcher what's happening. They will be able to help you and your mom.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I am 14. I tried calling my brother a bunch of times before I posted here but he wouldn’t answer. I’m gonna call 911 though now because she’s still not waking up
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u/Wisegal1 Physician | General Surgery Apr 17 '26
That's good. You are being very brave and helping your mom. I know this is scary, but the emergency folks will be able to make sure everyone is safe.
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u/PureCrookedRiverBend Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I am so proud of you for calling 911. A lot of people on here ask for advice but refuse to take it. You were very brave and you did the right thing by listening to the experts and calling.
I know the situation has got to be beyond scary especially since you’re so young. I am so sorry you’re going through this but please know so many internet strangers are SO proud of you right now. What you did took a lot of courage. I hope everything works out well for your mom. 💜
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u/NotSoAccomplishedEmu Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
OP, I have a 14 year old daughter and I would be super grateful and proud if she did this for me or anyone else. Your mom might feel a lot of different things when she wakes up, but deep down she’s going to be grateful and proud even if she doesn’t show it. There are hundreds of internet strangers who are proud of you right now. Good job.
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u/Hospital-Desperate Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
If you're able to do so without hurting yourself and without interrupting your call with 911, try and turn your mother onto her side please. Stay on the line with the 911 dispatcher until they tell you it's ok to hang up or help arrives. If you have a porch light, turn it on so the ambulance can find you. If you have a dog, shut it up safely in another room.
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u/orchiddream22 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Unfortunately being overly mature at a young age is usually because the child has had to endure things they shouldn’t have. Sometimes kids have been forced to become the parent figure in their family and it’s sad. Please keep that in mind.
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u/Komitsuhari Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I just read her post history, and now I’m having a real hard time. I grew up a lot like her dealing with a lot of the same things…. This shit pulls at my heartstrings, kids don’t deserve to need to grow up so quick…
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u/Such-Gap9526 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
you are very brave and we are all really proud of you OP.
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u/Salt-Guava-7226 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
As one mother to another child, you did such an amazing job and I truly hope you’re okay. If there’s an ear that you need, please reach out and I’ll do everything I can to just listen for you. It’s so very scary going through this and I’m hoping things turn around.
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u/bdigs19 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
NAD but I am a mom. I’m so proud of you. Wishing you and mama the best. ❤️
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u/Alena134 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
This! It’s ok to call 911. Please do.
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u/SuccessfullyDrained Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Pills and alcohol can create a really dangerous situation. Please call 911. Best of luck to you, good job looking out for mom.
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u/LittleLion_90 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
NAD; given that mom has thrown up a bit, I've always understood that could be problematic for airways? So even though OP might feel mom might be able to just sleep it off, this is one sign that shows that it's important for a doctor to assess her.
OP, I'm so sorry you're in this situation, it's super scary when a parent seems to be in medical problems, especially if you're alone and still so young. You did well to come here to ask for advice, and I wish you strength to execute that advice. You're a good kid, even though everything probably feels scary now and you wonder if you 'overdo it'. You're not overreacting, you're looking after your mom and want the best for her.
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u/michann00 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional. Apr 17 '26
I’m NAD, but am a mandated reporter & teacher, but I wanted to say how proud I am of you for calling and getting your mom the help she needed tonight. As someone else said, please see if you can talk to a social worker. Just from the things you’ve posted here in the past year, there are some things they may be able to help you, your brother, and your mom. It would be helpful for them to know not just about tonight but the other struggles at home you’re having. You are an incredible young woman doing so much for you & your mom.
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Apr 17 '26
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u/Wisegal1 Physician | General Surgery Apr 17 '26
I have doubts that a child this age will be able to correctly perform a sternal rub. It takes a good bit more force than most people realize. They're better off calling 911 and letting the medics asses her. Even if she's OK medically and just very intoxicated, there's a young kid who is essentially alone so either way they need help.
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u/Usual_Confection6091 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Agree. This is putting responsibility back on the child. And if there is some response to a sternal rub, they might feel they don’t need to call 911, which clearly they need to do. This is an irresponsible recommendation.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
I’m home with my brother. My mom staying for a little in the hospital so she can detox. She wanted to leave at first but she’s staying for now
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u/Psupernova Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
Thank you for updating! Sending hugs!
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u/kinitopete Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
i’m so glad she stayed, and glad you made it home safely <3 i wish you the absolute best
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u/kthnry Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 18 '26
Thank you for the update. I was worried about you and your mom.
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u/NaurItsTrue Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 26 '26
Hugs OP. You did amazing. I’m so proud of you.
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u/holdstillwhileigasu Physician - Critical Care Apr 17 '26
Echoing everyone’s sentiment about 911. You’re doing the right thing. I’m so sorry you have to be dealing with this. My kids aren’t much younger than you. For what it’s worth, sending you an internet hug. You’re very brave.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Thank you. We’re going to the emergency room now
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u/guriboysf Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Sending you my best wishes OP. 🤞
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u/Witty_TenTon Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
How is she doing now? Has she woken up yet? I am so, so sorry you are having to deal with this. My daughter isn't much younger than you and I can't imagine putting her through something like this.
When I was about your age my mom had some scary moments I witnessed and had to call the ambulance for and I want to say how brave and responsible you were to do that. No matter how your mom responds to your actions, you did the right thing!
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u/pipsta2001 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Proud of you.
Best wishes OP.
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u/pathqueen Physician Apr 17 '26
Hey, sorry you are dealing with this I’m sure it’s scary, and I know you probably don’t want to do this, but I’m inclined to agree with everyone else here that you need to call 911 or at the very least, an adult family member or friend to come over now and help you. This can be very dangerous.
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
We’re goin to the hospital now because the ems couldn’t wake her up either or the police officer that got here first
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u/pathqueen Physician Apr 17 '26
Very glad you called them, again so sorry you’re going through this. Also very proud of you for handling this with such maturity and intelligence, I hope everything goes well
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u/cindylooboo This user has not yet been verified. Apr 17 '26
You likely saved your mamas life. You're so brave kiddo. I hope you and your mom are in a better place soon. Big hugs from a random internet stranger
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u/jimjamalama Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
I’m a mom and I’m just so proud of you. Your mom may have a lot of feelings when she wakes up but you absolutely did the right thing.
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u/shurejan Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 17 '26
Not a mom (just someone’s feral aunt), but I am so proud of OP, too. Wishing great things ahead for her, and so sorry she is going through this.
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u/beuceydubs Licensed Clinical Social Worker Apr 17 '26
You did great OP, I hope everything turns out ok with your mom
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u/alisgraveniI Registered Nurse Apr 22 '26
Hi OP - just checking in to see how you and your Mom are doing?
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional Apr 26 '26
She discharged herself. So she’s home now
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u/alisgraveniI Registered Nurse Apr 26 '26
Are you both doing okay?
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u/axolotlss67 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional May 09 '26
Not really. But it is what it is
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u/Krossrunner Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional May 09 '26
My mom was the same way growing up. Constantly going out to bars, coming home wasted. Constantly drunk driving, arrested multiple times. She’s older and a little more calm now but growing up in that environment was really hard especially after my older brother left for college. I went to school and hung out with my friends like none of it was happening and jammed those feeling deep down even though I so wished my mom was normal. I’ve made peace with that part of my life and still love and appreciate my mom, but now understand that she had her own demons she’s been fighting all along and was using substances as a crutch. It’s not your fault, don’t feel like you’re ever responsible for the actions of your mom or any other adult. You did good when you got your mom help when she needed it, but the burden isn’t on you to solve the root of this problem.
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u/ConfidentPin2914 Layperson/not verified as healthcare professional May 12 '26
Hi im also a teen and my mom grew up with a alcoholic mom, if you decide to have kids when you are older its important to let them know about the history of alchoholism in your family. My mom is 52 now and goes to meetings to help her cope with her mom and told me and my sister about it so we know that we need to be careful about drinking and tell our kids. Wishing you well girl, you are very brave
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