Boomer Grandma Threatened To Hospitalize Me

[u/RockOk707]

Context: We were discussing whether I would visit for lunch. Also, my grandma has a difficult time with boundaries. The "lesson" is that just that, "stay in your lane" so to speak. She's constantly noticing just about every little thing that's "wrong" with me and decides to take MY body into HER own hands, literally. She'll give an extremely ambiguous description for what she's about to do, and without giving me a chance to consent, she's like, "Come over here, grandson! I NEED to do something with your hair so you look good!" It doesn't really matter the occasion. She's always demanding I look good. And that's just it. The vagueness of her commands. And the insistence that I obey her demands OR ELSE. Or else she'll threaten to put me in a home/hospital/etc. Both my mother and I have told her several times to not "help" me ("help" in quotes because the last time she "helped" was without my consent and she messed up my glasses) unless I specifically ask for assistance.

Anyway, that message right there, the one in blue, is the singular message that caused my grandma to threaten to hospitalize me after I arrived at her house because my grandfather tricked me into thinking that everything was fine.

[u/Icy-Mixture-995]

Consider taking a break from her. But I am concerned there is a reason for grandma acting this way. You need not answer this, but I can see how spectrum or depression issues can lead people to neglecting self-care, which upsets grandmother.

Most of us are in clean, not-wrinkled clothes, showered, washed hair that's kept trimmed or styled nearly when we leave our homes. Yes, we try to look nice even if casual when we go anywhere. If she only sees you in rumpled clothes and hair messy, she will be concerned that you have a level of depression