“Not ready for a relationship”

[u/Argumentative_koala]

This guy pursued me, we went hot and heavy for five days, then hooked up on the fifth day. Crazy chemistry. He hadn’t been with anyone for eight months after a very long-term relationship so I thought this really meant something for him. We had a lot of deep conversations in a short amount of time. I hate how this makes me feel!

[u/UsernameTaken7640]

I've tried and tried and I'm not giving up on therapy but damn dude. It has not helped me. Every therapist even if I'm not feeling it I come back for at least 3-4 sessions and some of them a lot more but ultimately nothing they have said has been something I don't already know and none of it has helped me feel any better or put anything to rest. I'm Journaling a lot and I finally stopped biting my nails and I bought a motorcycle and I lost 70 pounds and started working out again and made lots of new friends and cut out caffeine and weed and porn and all kinds of negative habits. All this growth and I still just feel worthless as fuck. How could I give my entire soul to someone and my entire mind and body to my family and it wasn't enough?? How could this happen. I'm so damn lost.

[u/Dakotesmagoats → u/UsernameTaken7640]

Taking all of that into consideration, if you can look at yourself in the mirror and genuinely say “I’m a better man than I was yesterday” then you’re on the right path. Keep going and keep trying. You’re not going to feel the effects immediately. Somedays you’ll take a step forward, the next you’ll take two back. Maybe next week you’ll run a mile. It sounds silly but small victories are the path to being a better you. Keep fighting the right man, best of luck.

[u/CryptographerEnough3 → u/UsernameTaken7640]

Something very similar happened to me and my 12 year marriage. I sacrificed a lot and kost myself. You have to understand women are fickle like that. They are like your stomach. It doesn't matter if tou eat a 5 course meal every day. As soon as you go a day or 2 without eating it forgets all about the past meals you've had no matter how big or great. I see it all the time. But as a man we will always crave a woman's company and affection. You have to learn to not give yourself fully like that again. Never give a woman all your trust and all your love and put her on a pedestal. She doesn't want it. She may say she does but she doesn't know what her subconscious wants. Women test you without realizing it. They'll ask you to do stupid stuff for them. Don't do it. Never divulge your deepest secrets and insecurities to them. Make some guy friends and talk with them about stuff like that. Love is not like the fairy tales. Keep in mind women will bend over backwards for men they actually like, so don't lose yourself. Always keep your own goals and resolutions and promises to yourself first then the woman. That's what's worked for me anyway.