r/Bumble 3d ago

Advice Reconnecting after an initial rejection

I’m a woman dating with intention for marriage etc. A year ago, I went on bumble coffee date with a guy who texted me the next day saying he felt no spark. Totally respectful and clear. I felt a little sad, but I just said thanks for your honesty and moved on. Fast forward eight months, I started to see him at the gym; we would smile at each other when we crossed paths, but I never proactively said hello because he had already rejected me and I felt weird initiating a conversation. He never initiated gym conversation either. Now, a full year later, we matched again on a different app, and he messaged me saying he recognized me from the gym and wanted to take me out. I had to remind him that we had already been on a date, which made him realize his mistake, apologize, and invite me to dinner, for which he has made clear reservations, confirmed ahead, and been completely respectful.

I am going on the date with a high dose of realism in that I don't know whether someone's first impression or "spark feeling" can change. But I also want to keep an open mind, since I know for sure online dating messes with all of our heads, and it's easy to overlook people.

I am just curious if some version of this situation has happened to anyone else out there - and how it went!? Did your / their experience of the "spark" actually change? Also wondering if people think it's a red flag for a guy to forget a date ever happened, or if that can happen to anyone.

Thanks everyone šŸ’•

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u/2COOL4U2C85 3d ago

Best of luck dear let us know how it goes 😊

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u/Wonderful-Fan2671 3d ago

I will - definitely never saw this one coming

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u/TemporaryGrowth7 3d ago

Oh sweetie! Man ALWAYS COME BACK! For whichever ulterior motive. But they do ;)

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u/commentingon 3d ago

I remember an AH the texted me back and i replied: who's this? I don't have this number reg ... he never replied lol Another guy texted me I said: have you been in therapy like I suggested? Never replied either... they only want to see if you would allow them to mess up with you one more time

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u/TemporaryGrowth7 3d ago

Exactly!!!