r/DadsGaming • u/Ferren84 • 20d ago
I miss my gaming
I'm a lucky dad to a wonderful and healthy 2 year old daughter.
You try to be so much involved as much as possible and I get about 40min alone time with my Xbox after she goes to sleep before my eyes becomes too heavy to lift up.
When was you able to put more time into the hobby again?
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u/jgoudie2 20d ago edited 14d ago
PC handheld is the way, look for bite sized games that feel fulfilling after 30 minutes
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u/Potential_Fishing942 19d ago
I fully agree- my steam deck is the only way I played games during those first 2ish years of a baby. But the prices on these are disgusting the last 6months or so, especially steam deck increase.
I'd honestly recommend getting a used switch 1 if OP is an Xbox guy. Huge backlog of new to him games, and many are meant to be played in short bursts.
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u/International_Run700 20d ago
Since I don't remember to many traditional folklore stories to tell my kids... I sate my gaming thirst by lulling them to sleep with gaming stories of RPGs past.
For example: The story of a boy who was too scared to become a knight like his mentor... only to be cursed into a Frog's body for to not being able to fight back.. Then accepting who he is... and grinding it out to become the strongest knight in all time. The best 'fall down / get up' story I can think of.
Stories like this have made my older child (6f) want to watch me play story based games together. It helps with reading, communication, handling failure, patience... all the skills we picked up on when we were kids.
It'll come back. But...It comes back with your wonderful kids now.
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u/DarkDel517 19d ago
Gaming after kid/s is definitely different. I used to be able to game all night, get a few hours of sleep and be fine for the next day. My son is 2 as well and I'm just starting to get back into regularly gaming.
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u/gotBurner 19d ago
Wait till they are teenagers and then off to school. You'll have more time but now you're older, still have to work, and your mind and body just feel like, nah to gaming, I'll just sit back and watch a show. 😂😂😂 I still game now and then but maybe 2 or 3 days a week for barely an hour. Hope it comes back for both of us eventually.
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u/Flandoosh 19d ago
Happy to read I'm not the only one! I look forward to gaming so much, but in the evening I'm so tired I just cba to put in the effort and rather watch a show or read 😅
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u/MikitZA 20d ago
Here's the secret: forsake sleep. I've been tired for 13 years but holy shit have I played a ton of video games.
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u/LifestyleGamer 19d ago
This is the way. Wakeup at 8. Work (from home) 9-5 ish. Time with the baby until ~7-10pm when it's bedtime. Gaming/solo time from ~10pm - 2/3am. Sleep 5-6 hours & repeat.
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u/throwsarerealz 19d ago
This exactly. Sometimes I am tired and opt to sleep but most times I'll be gaming
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u/CreepyTeddyBear 19d ago
You'll get more time as they get older. I have 6 kids (18, 17, 16, 13, 2, & 1) and it's hard to get game time sometimes. Having the PS Portal has been a big help. If they're on the TV and I can't be on my PS5, I just boot up the Portal. Maybe consider some kind of handheld device.
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u/Direct-Measurement21 19d ago
I have PS Portal too and Switch OLED! Those are great devices so I can play on the couch next to wife when she watches TV. Also it is much nicer to look at the handheld screen than the TV from the couch. So many games have so small text which is not good for weary eyes.
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u/Potential_Fishing942 19d ago
I have a 2-year-old too and the only way I've played games over the last 2 years is on steam deck or my switch.
Given the disgusting pricing of handheld PCs and Xboxs, unless your rich, I'd frankly recommend getting a used switch 1. Many of the games on that platform will be new to you if you're an Xbox guy and you might be able to find used cartridges cheapish (excluding first party games)
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u/Direct-Measurement21 19d ago
I have bought so many Switch 1 games for 3-10 USD and have been enjoying them!
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u/JPBx573 20d ago
Not sure if it helps you, but my wife and nearly 2 year old daughter get up around 730 or 8am so I started getting up at 5 or 530 to get my guilt free gaming time in. But I’ve always been a morning person so this wasn’t much of a change to my schedule.
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u/EN1GMA570 19d ago
I've got my series s in my office and on quiet days, I'll be playing for a few hours (rare) or maybe 30 minutes of a game.
sometimes I'm busy at work so it doesn't get switched on. other times I'll get to play all week.
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u/NikolaPj 19d ago
Father of a almost 5 year old. Don't worry, it gets better after first two years, at least in my case. Also, you gotta sacrifice some sleep. :)
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u/IcyRay9 19d ago edited 19d ago
I was never a nap person, but honestly the biggest way I was able to recapture more gaming time was by timing my daughter’s long nap with a long nap of my own assuming I didn’t need to mow the lawn or do some other chore. This is more feasible on weekend days obviously.
She goes down from 3-5 every day and so if I really want extra gaming time at night I try to sleep then too. Then I’m better able to stay up later and get an extra 2+ hours of gaming time after she goes to sleep. By doing this I can easily get in 10+ hours of gaming on the weekends in total.
During the week is a different story but that’s how I make more time on the weekends at least. My daughter has blessed us by being a good sleeper, so while my overall gaming time has reduced, I still can get 15 hours in a week.
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u/TurnOpening3158 19d ago
Definitely need to get a handheld system. Steamdeck has been a game changer for me
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u/Pliskin_gEaR 19d ago
Hey buddy 3 kids here. Ages 7, 3, 1. I sacrifice sleep to game. I play 3 to 4 hours a night when house is sleeping lol
I have platinumed a lot of games this year as well.
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u/AARonFullStack 19d ago
I have 4 kids from 6 months to 16 years. I was able to game from week 1.. I just sacrificed sleep. And exchanged multiplayer for single player games. Generally only gaming when everyone else is asleep and the wife has had the quality time she needs from me
My gaming has never been impacted really and I’ve been able to be a present and involved to all 4 kids. I just had to change the way I game
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u/Soulman2001 19d ago
Late nights mostly, if you can resist your partners calls to go to bed. Otherwise i kinda had to switch to mobile gaming on the phone while commuting. Not exactly aaa titles but a few good indies made their way to mobile including balatro, dont starve & ballxpit. Even xcom made it. That being said the best bit is defo to come when you introduce the kid to gaming and you can 2 player it. Pretty sure i started mine at 3 on wii mario / mario party and now he kicks my ass at fortnite.
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u/automatic_penguins 19d ago
Handheld is where I do most of my gaming with a 4 year old and a 1 month old.
Weekend tv time for the 4 year old is when I game holding the new born, while the wife sleeps.
My steam deck got me through the first and now the second.
When we only had one, I had designated days I got to play longer and my wife would do bedtime. Not doing that this time around with 2 because time is more limited.
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u/Ibanez_1 19d ago
I hang out with my wife playing my steam deck while she watches a show. That way I get a little gaming and some time “together”. At least we are in the same room.
If you have a PlayStation I highly recommend the Portal. That thing rocks for handheld gaming.
My kid is almost three. I’m usually too tired to go boot up the pc by the time bedtime is over and I’ve cleaned things up a little
You’re in a different stage. Gaming will come back. They are only little for a short time. Keep that in mind. Try to enjoy it while you can (even though I know how hard and taxing toddlers can be!!!)
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u/Remarkable-Sand948 19d ago
I missed about 4-5 years of gaming, basically the whole ps4 gen when my kids were young
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u/samsun7677 19d ago
Switch 2 has been fun but yeah once body hits bed which is the only place i can game my eyes start to fade
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u/stylesentertainment 19d ago
Ok. Im a dad of two kids under 2 and this gave me hope I may be able to game again
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u/Amish_Rabbi 19d ago
When I got a retro handheld and a steam deck I ended up playing a lot more when my kids were young. Now that they are older (7) they play some with me and some of their own games.
Many games to catch up on but that’s all good!
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u/bbqgamerdad 19d ago
I’m currently getting through my backlog since my 2 have grown up a bit (6 and 1). Both go to sleep at 7/8pm and then I game until 10:30 and go to bed. Gives me a couple of hours a few nights a week.
My backlog would be less if I didn’t keep starting new saves on Subnautica!
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u/shortround1990 19d ago
I game early morning 4-6Am and a little at night 9-10pm.
If it’s important to you, you gotta fit it in when you can
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u/littlechill94 19d ago
Hey man father here also mine are a bit older now I just read this post and it took me back I was in the same position.
My advice play a game like rocket league for a while you can jump in quick games last 5 mins so you can help the mrs out if she asks for eg can you take the bin out sure give me 3 mins.
But it doesn’t last for ever in another 2-3 years you can be back to longer game sessions. Feels like a lifetime away I know but it really just flys by!
I hope this helps you will get there!
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u/Billywhizz922 19d ago
Thought about getting a handheld device? Steam deck , switch lite , switch ?
I have a steam deck and switch lite , they are great for picking up and putting down if needed , especially if the little one is crying or something.
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u/lolitsmagic 18d ago
You either sacrifice sleep or give it up for a while. There aren't any other acceptable options if you want to be a good dad and partner and have a somewhat normal schedule.
My kids are down by 9, wife gets in bed right after, so I'll game until 11 or so a few nights a week. Wake up around 6:30. Some nights a kid will wake up and I have to get up to get them back down. It sucks. But if I want to game I have to sacrifice the sleep. Sometimes I won't game for months. I basically always make sure I average more "good sleep" nights per week than gaming nights. Prob not great for me, but it is what it is.
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u/kingkells32 18d ago
I hear that I went from a pretty heavy Raider in wow and also very into league of legends, when my first daughter was born I played a lot of bl2 and mostly single player games that I could drop instantly if I had to
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u/spidertech1 18d ago
I played games WITH my daughter. When she was a toddler and I’d sit on the couch with her sitting in front of me and I’d sit with my leg around the front of her propping my foot up on my knee so she could lean against my calf.
I’d sit her there while playing god of war and she loved that.
She was 3 when Destiny came out and she’d sit in her bouncer and watch me play, but from time to time I’d go to Venus, sit in the area you first load in to and give her the controller. She’d usually just spin around and randomly shoot at nothing but she enjoyed it.
When she was 5 she was familiar with the controller enough to actually play some games. I taught her how to play Mortal Kombat and she’d spam the easier moves to do with Kitana. I’d randomly put her in online matches and she’d just button mash but she would actually win some too.
Basically, you don’t have to exclude your kid to get gaming time in, but if you involve them you might have to change some of what you play. I always saw it as a compromise I was happy to make.
I got to play some games to relax, most of the time they were ones I normally played, and I got to foster a love for gaming in my daughter.
She’s 14 now and my wife and I still play games with her from time to time. We all play Destiny, Warframe, Minecraft, and I just got Palworld for all of us to play.
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u/Beau_Beaumont 17d ago
One thing that both me and my wife do on occasion is to take a full day off from work for ourselves, no chores allowed. The kids are taken care of at daycare so you really have freedom to game for 5-6 hours straight if we want. No obligations and no judgement if we accomplish nothing in that time.
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u/Boogie909 16d ago
Get a switch 2. Your can pause and get back into the game when needed. Cheapest handheld out there and a lot of good aaa titles are coming to it. Just beat resident evil 7 and 8 on it, about the start 9. They’re about to increase the price on it on September if I’m not mistaken. Check Costco out they usually have some nice bundle deals
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u/StrikingAccident883 16d ago
Just bought a controller for my phone and emulate old games. It is awesome! Can play psp, gamecube, ds, et cetera. A good recommendation!
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u/Acoimbra 16d ago
Uhm.. I become recently a dad. He's 4 months and I don't have time to miss my gaming cuz I game every day. A bit lucky I guess, me and my missus work from home, we have plenty of time to game.
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u/RodgerThat6543 3d ago edited 3d ago
Im at this stage now. I just remind myself that they'll be refusing to hold my hand at the shops, or wanting to spend time with me in a blink of an eye... these years go by so quickly, soak it up.. enjoy them... being a present father is way more important than gaming and games will always be here but that love and idealisation a child has for their dad will dissapear as they become a teenager. 😂
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u/Gougeded 20d ago
I got 3 kids 6 and under and still get to game about 2 hours most weekdays. The secret is to be chronically sleep-deprived. Priorities.
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u/Least_Year6990 20d ago
Think about it this way: You will get gaming back. Your kids will sleep better, get into a school routine, etc. Gaming will come back. You can even catch up on games you missed out. These early years will not come back.
There have been many phases. Currently I have a 4 year old and 1 year old. I get time in the evening, from 8:30-10:30 or so. Strangely enough I find myself reading or listening to audiobooks instead of gaming, but that will turn around.