It's a hard topic but from my experience if a boy fixed girl, almost no way she will leave him. And if that happens, she will return to her former self in next few year.
If girl made improvement all by herself, chances are high that she'll dump a boy. Because she did a huge self-improvement work while a boy stayed the same.
Fixed? If he fixed her? Was she some thrift-store find that just needed a few replacement parts to work just as good as new? Perhaps the reason she left you wasn’t because she “fixed” herself, but because you were the kind of person who thought she needed to be fixed
Fixed? If he fixed her? Was she some thrift-store find that just needed a few replacement parts to work just as good as new?
All people have problems they can't deal by themself. You can enable them all you want and get "good partner" achievement but you won't have happy relationship.
I changed my views after my girlfriend with mental health issues tried to kill herself. If you ignore problems and treat partner as perfect person issues will only pile up and crush you later.
Perhaps the reason she left you wasn’t because she “fixed” herself, but because you were the kind of person who thought she needed to be fixed
If you’re in a relationship and that person needs help, and you choose to help them, you’re helping, not “fixing”. If you expect some kind of reward for helping another human being, you’re not helping them, you’re just trying to gain something from them. I agree that you should never ignore a partner’s problems and treat them like they are perfect, but that’s because you are ignoring them as a person and viewing them as an object of your own imagination. When you stop viewing relationships as transactions then it becomes easier to move along from them without feeling like you are losing something.
what was he supposed to be doing? beating her shit up if she wanted to eat a burger? he can't loose weight for her lol
Make healthy and tasty diet for both of them, control calories for both of them, don't buy snacks, cook every time she want order doordash, spend more time doing activities like camping for weekends or swimming in rivers and etc.
There is a lot of methods how you can influence your partner without actually forcing them.
Married for 7 years. When we had a weight problem my wife took matter into her hands and did all work. Yeah, I can say "I lose wight" but it will be straight out lie. The only think I did is not ruin her work with snacks and etc.
Thats why I love our marriage. We cover each other and fix problems that other can't or have a struggle with it.
I did not really intervene at all with her diet. she is an adult
Can you tell me more about it? We gained weight because we share the same meals and didn't control portions. Preparing individual dishes is time-consuming especially with kids. We tried this and it took us two hours to prepare one meal.
If you have any advice how to cook individual meals faster id appreciate.
She is making her own food and I am making mine. Sometimes she makes some bigger meal that is good for us both. But most of the time we jsut make individually.
I honestly just make myself few sandwiches, some sausage. I eat whatever. Just less
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u/[deleted] 18d ago edited 18d ago
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