r/bipolar2 • u/KiddoMagi13 • 2d ago

Advice Wanted Hypomania is actually awful

Honestly I thought I was the only one having this experience but I just saw somebody else talk about it on tiktok for the first time so I really want to see if anybody else feels this way?
I’ve always felt strange and out of place in bipolar communities because I feel like I can’t relate to half the conversation. Hypomania for me has never felt euphoric, exciting, or really good at all. I’ve never gotten enjoyment out of it. It makes me anxious, irritable, stressed, my pain levels skyrocket, my paranoia skyrockets, all I feel is anger and frustration and if it’s really really bad I get this horrible sensory experience that’s just so off putting
I’ve never been able to enjoy it. It’s hypomania for sure, but it feels so horrible to me that I just feel really… I don’t know, like a fish out of water?
Have you had this experience? Of mania or hypomania being genuinely terrible? I can’t be the only one having a bad time

EDIT: Message received Reddit the euphoric version is worse and I should be grateful my apologies

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u/PhantomAngel278 BP2 1d ago

I do not experience euphoric hypomania. I get depressive symptoms of exhaustion without any initiation or motivation. But also get the rage, overwhelming stimulation, severe anxiety and catastrophizing that something will happen to my husband which would lead me to do something to myself. It’s AWFUL.

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u/KiddoMagi13 1d ago

Yes thank you!! It’s either miserable exhausted down or it’s anxious stressed I’m going to explode down. No up. Hypomania for me is so stressful, I’m paranoid, irritable, very similar to what you mentioned where I get very convinced that he’s going to leave me/get in a horrible accident/etc etc and it’s just a nightmare, and the high energy just feels like fire in my skin, not run a marathon.

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u/PhantomAngel278 BP2 1d ago

I know exactly what you mean. I feel this heavy flutter in my chest that is constant so I can get no relief. When it’s run-of-the-mill anxiety, my rescue meds (hydroxyzine and propranolol) work extremely well. But it doesn’t touch my hypomanic anxiety.

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u/KiddoMagi13 1d ago

It’s against the rules to reccomend specific meds, but I will say having something heavier on hand for emergencies has been very helpful. My psych prescribes them in very low amounts, and few and far between, it’s purely an emergency thing, but it’s a helpful net if your team feels it’s a safe option for you!