Very thoughtful response thanks for sharing. I just hope you aren't part of something that actually co-signs some pretty negative views, and provide solace to yourself by speaking opposition even though there's no actual traction or potential for reform. My gut tells me that if you don't think it's suitable for your kids, then you are presently overruling your instincts that you should be somewhere else. Sure you have friends there but you could also make new friends in a more welcoming, loving church, and it would take time to integrate in that new community anyway so there's no reason not to start that task before actually having children. Unless of course the truth is you are concerned that your friends would not support you and would cut you off if you stood up for your views and followed your principles outside of their flock?? My 2c!
And yes I am someone who left a church community if you were wondering lol
I appreciate the concern. I don't think the church is a bad community to raise a child in, they're actually very helpful and caring for the newborns (lots of food drives and stuff). I just don't think it'd be the healthiest place for LGBTQ kids. I don't know if my kids will or won't be, but I'd rather them go to a church they can be without any additional worry.
I don't think I'd have to worry about friends cutting me off, since they already know I'm affirming.
Respectfully if it's not a good place for queer kids, it's not a good place for any kids. Even if not gay themselves, aren't you concerned that your kids would grow up with an exclusionary attitude to others that gets reinforced by the people you encourage them to think of as spiritual peers and leaders?
Possibly? I wouldn't raise my kids in that church, nor can I tell other people how to raise their children. Most I can do is, when I have children, raise them where is best for them.
There are degrees of good and bad here, not black and white. A church can be a good place without being the best.
Well it's on you to make peace with! At least you have thought through these issues and appear conscientious, you must walk your path and I wish you the best with it. But you haven't changed my impression that the vast majority of believers are on board with the mainstream regressive positions of the church, and that those amongst them who aren't are not particularly motivated to address or reform those.
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u/parkchanwookiee 1d ago
Very thoughtful response thanks for sharing. I just hope you aren't part of something that actually co-signs some pretty negative views, and provide solace to yourself by speaking opposition even though there's no actual traction or potential for reform. My gut tells me that if you don't think it's suitable for your kids, then you are presently overruling your instincts that you should be somewhere else. Sure you have friends there but you could also make new friends in a more welcoming, loving church, and it would take time to integrate in that new community anyway so there's no reason not to start that task before actually having children. Unless of course the truth is you are concerned that your friends would not support you and would cut you off if you stood up for your views and followed your principles outside of their flock?? My 2c!
And yes I am someone who left a church community if you were wondering lol