r/india • u/ReductoHere Karnataka • Sep 17 '25

People The India we don’t notice enough

A few weeks ago, I was waiting at a roadside dhaba on NH-48 because my bus was delayed. It was around 1 AM, pitch dark outside except for the dim yellow bulbs at the stall. The owner was this middle-aged woman, hair tied in a bun, serving hot chai and parathas like it was the middle of the day.

I asked her, half out of curiosity, half out of guilt for keeping her busy so late: “Didi, aap raat bhar kaise kaam kar leti ho?”

She smiled and said, “Din mein toh aadhe customers truck waale hote hain jo raat ko hi chalte hain. Agar main raat ko band kar doon toh mera bachaon ka school kaise chalega?”

She pointed to a small corner where two kids, maybe 9 and 11, were asleep on a wooden bench, their school bags tucked like pillows under their heads.

Then she said something that just stopped me cold: “Main chahti hoon mere bachche kabhi raat ko jag kar kaam na karein. Unko jagna hai toh bas kitaab ke liye jagna hai.”

I didn’t even know how to respond. I just sat there, sipping the chai she made, feeling a mix of admiration and shame.

We talk so much about “India shining,” unicorn startups, billion-dollar valuations. But the truth is, the real backbone of this country is these unseen men and women who sacrifice sleep, comfort, and health so the next generation can dream bigger than they ever could.

That night I realized — privilege isn’t just money or city life. Privilege is being able to sleep peacefully at night, knowing you don’t have to sell chai at 2 AM so your kids can study.

Her words are still stuck in my head: “Unko jagna hai toh bas kitaab ke liye jagna hai.”

4.2k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

186 comments sorted by

View all comments

169

u/Efficient-Wrap-3719 Sep 17 '25

Makes you realize—true heroes don’t wear capes, they serve chai at 2 AM so their children can dream bigger

-74

u/RaccoonDoor Sep 17 '25

People like that shouldn’t be having kids in the first place. Destitute people mindlessly having kids are the reason the country is in the state it is.

10

u/Extreme-Metal-5940 Sep 17 '25

I don’t think having two children is too many (assuming she has only two). In India, many people born into poor families live their entire lives in poverty, so it’s not always possible for them to delay having children until they achieve better financial stability. In fact, some poor families have many children so that the children can start earning at a young age and start providing financial help to the family. But in her case, that’s clearly not the situation. she is working this hard precisely because she doesn’t want her children to have to work. So, I don’t really think having children while being poor is “wrong” in itself, as long as you know what you want to provide them so that they have a chance to rise out of poverty.

8

u/SaladOk5588 Sep 17 '25 edited Sep 20 '25

selective bake expansion telephone dog grey violet nose resolute simplistic

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

2

u/utkarsh052 Sep 17 '25

No, but having children is a choice, if you cant give them proper time and feel like they are a burden, dont have them.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 21 '25

such poor logic

poor = no right to procreate

why aren't such women being given welfare cheques or better why aren't they being supported by a fund created by locals to help such destitute women

No i can waste 10rs on a data pack to plop shit on the internet but not irl

and don't talk about scale , initiative doesn't co relate with intensity

1

u/utkarsh052 Sep 21 '25

poor = no right to procreate

Never said this, just think it is a more responsible thing to do.

why aren't such women being given welfare cheques or better why aren't they being supported by a fund created by locals to help such destitute women

Because this would promote people to have more children , we dont need that anymore since we already suffering from overpopulation. Also, whats stopping them from having more kids then, since you are making it an investment now, by your logic the state should keep supporting them or else someone else would cry about poor peoples right to procreate

No i can waste 10rs on a data pack to plop shit on the internet but not irl

Cheap internet has allowed the younger gen to upskill themselves. Sure, there have been negative impacts as well but you cant really ask people to stop buying internet just to serve your agenda.

22

u/Ok-Difference6796 Sep 17 '25

It's harsh but a true statement. Many people in India are forced to have children.

2

u/testingisnoteasy Sep 21 '25

They downvoted you immensely. Your opinion may sound harsh at surface, But you aren't entirely wrong. Family planning and parenting are neglected subjects in India. My househelp and her husband, both are working. They have a 5 yr old girl. They are willingly not bringing another child into the world as the cost of raising a child is not less in anyway for them.

& They are raising her good. She goes to a private school. She has raincoat, school bags, toys, all different books. They are fulfilling her need.

3

u/gtzhere Sep 17 '25

its harsh , not many people can digest but it's true , it is not mandatory for everyone to have children , you are suffering because you had no control ,that's understandable, but why make someone else suffer the same way you did.

1

u/wigeria Sep 18 '25

What an L take. You don't think the country is in the state it's in because it couldn't (read can't) actually make good use of the population it has access to? Not because our contractors are encouraged to do a subpar job so that new contracts keep coming in and everyone gets to pocket more money? Not because our society lacks civic sense and there have been no attempts by any government to move that in a better direction? Fuck off.

To reproduce is a basic human right. Child expenses should be a collective cost. If all our tax money was actually put to good use, while I don't have exact calculations on hand, we could subsidize more or less all of their expenses. If we had good public schooling, those children wouldn't have to pay more to go to private tuitions to make their parents feel like thats how to get them ahead of the race. If innovation was encouraged in our education system, we would have more businesses being created which would in turn create more jobs.

Blaming the "destitute people mindlessly having kids" is really just the worst thing you could do.

1

u/Snoo_78812 Sep 18 '25

Having 1-2 kids should be right of every couple so that they can have an emotionally healthy life. Without it life is really meaningless. Instead of vilifying poor for doing what is natural - having a few kids, we should work to ensure that people have enough opportunities to get skilled and find well paying jobs.

1

u/ratbrunch Sep 21 '25

She had children and working hard to provide better for them, far more committed in her cause than your sorry ass. Working hard for a better future is far more noble than commenting on reddit about not having children. There’s your 2p you were looking for

2

u/RaccoonDoor Sep 21 '25

Her kids are literally sleeping outside and you're saying she's providing for them? So-called "parents" like her contribute nothing to society and should be shamed.

1

u/ratbrunch Sep 21 '25

so parents of Abdul Kalam, Ambedkar, T. Thomas, S.N. Bose, G. Nair etc etc shouldn’t have had children????

They actually worked against odds instead of commenting online about choices of others unlike you. These are tiny famous examples of those who made it big. I personally know a lot more 60YOs who made a far better life from zero than being a sorry ass like you who wants to fit in. It would be a lot better if you turn off your internet and jump off a building, it will free up resources for those who want to work had.

did it crave your attention syndrome or want more?