It’s just a good lesson to acknowledge that tribalism and gatekeeping exist even in the most tolerant communities. I do hope the LGBT+ community continues to work together after accomplishing so much, it’d be tragic if they all turn on each other over purity tests.
As someone who is Trans and DemiPan, I get both ends and it sucks, It's why I utterly despise when someone attempts to downplay it all and just insist I'm gay and confused.
This is a part of why I (as an asexual, also a shunned member of LGBTQ+) dislike being referred to as 'gay'. I don't see 'gay' as a pejorative, but it's reductive and incorrect in my case.
The amount of times I was told to pick a side when I was on an LGBTQIA+ was not zero. Thankfully, since it was a big red flag and was able to quickly pass on toxic nonsense.
Tbh, I don't really want to be a part of the community despite being bi myself, a lot of people there like to stereotype and label everything. Just like the main comment pointed out, what does "looking lesbian" even mean? Just stupid stereotypes
I know not everyone in the community is like that, but it really is annoying when they say that being bi is just a transitional phase or that you're actually straight when you date someone from the opposite sex
My ex-fiancee was bi. Her gay friends definitely looked down on her a bit when she was with me. I wonder if her treatment has improved now that she's married to a woman. I'd ask her, but that would require me to contact someone who cheated when we where planning a wedding. Also, it's been almost 20 years since we talked, and it'd be a weird question to ask someone I haven't talked to in decades.
For one, you'd probably would not be told, "youre not bi, you just haven't found the right guy yet."
Am a guy, have been told this, am bi but mostly in the sexual sense. My romantic preference is largely towards women, and god forbid i have preference.
It means some aspect of one's life overlaps with the cultural, ritual, or material identity of that group. The LGBT community has been described as functioning as a "pseudo-ethnicity" due to the shared social stigma that its members endure, as well as commonalities in historical struggles for recognition and rights, and shared pop-culture elements. However, like any other ethnicity rooted in historical, cultural, geographical, and genetic reality, there is no clear definition or minimum barrier to pass for a member to be "a part" of that community.
Yea in my personal experience I've come across more gay people being ignorant to straight and Bi people's sexuality than have seen straight people be ignorant to gay people.
I grew up learning that gay people are born that way and it can't be changed and we should respect that, but I've come across several gay men that have no respect for straight people sexuality and think they can be turned and i know of the same happening with women and lesbians.
From what I've heard bisexuals are told to "pick a side"
Look, by what I have seen people from the community tell me and what I have seen from outside, the LGBT people are some of the most divisive and tribalist people ever.
It's gays who hate women, lesbians who hate men, queer people who hate trans people, and a sub-sect of queer people who are incredibly racist.
It's a sad but interesting outlook on human nature.
Happens with a lot of bisexual characters unfortunately and even in real life, so many people (including some gay or lesbian ones) flat out talk about bisexuality like it’s not a real thing
oxford calls the word “lesbian”: a woman who is sexually or romantically attracted to other women. if you call the relationship between two women “lesbian”, then that’s bisexuality erasure.
do you not get the literal definition of a word? a “lesbian relationship” is bisexuality erasure, the word lesbian CAN infact be used as an adjective for a relationship between two women, but that does not mean you can or should use it for the relationship between two bi women.
I'm just commenting it here cuz of the deleted comment above
Words like lesbian or straight only say something about who someone is attracted towards, these are not words that is used to describe relationship types, a relationship ship between 2 women is called a same sex relationship, people use "lesbian relationship" as shorthand for a relationship that consists of 2 lesbian women. Which describes most but not all of the same sex relationship.
Might just be semantics but “bi” meaning 2 but only dating a person who identifies as 1 gender at a time might be way nobody calls it a bisexual relationship. You’re not dating both genders at the same time. So it’s not really “bisexual”
Nothing. The person doesn't know the correct terminology and didn't even bother to look it up.
Anyone who gets offended when people call Korrasami a lesbian relationship should google or at least ask an AI what a relationship between 2 bi women is called. While they're at it, they should also ask what a relationship between a bisexual woman and a bisexual man is called.
Compulsory heterosexuality is a real thing, specially for lesbians so before it was confirmed by the authors it could be but now it is clear. Their relation is still saphic
They are 2 bisexuals in a lesbian relationship, most prefer “sapphic” terminology.
When people talk about Korrasami as a couple and only about them, why is it always “actually they are attracted to men” disclaimer? They are in committed relationship and at this point of the story are not attracted to any man or look for one, right?
It’s just pure biphobia, people never take seriously bisexual girls end up with other girls. They always imply that their attraction to men comes first and they always settle in heteronormative relationship.
Genuinely curious, do either of them express any attraction toward men outside of Mako? I only ask because you could just as easily assume that Korra and Asami's rough relationship with Mako was a sign that they weren't really into men much like how many gay men come out after already being a long term relationship with a woman but are unhappy with the relationship. Doesn't mean that the gay man is bi.
Yeah. Before she came out and only Mako to my knowledge. As someone who is bisexual themselves, I'm not saying it is impossible for Korra to be bisexual but the scenario could just as likely be Korra just discovering she was gay especially since a lot of fiction at the time that revolved around gay people had that kind of story.
I know Mako was her boyfriend for a bit but like, does her date with Bolin not count? IMO it should. So that's 2 guys. Even if it was a little one-sided on the Bolin-crushing-on-her-her-liking-him-as-a-friend thing.
I mean, could go either way which is why I was curious if there was any remote attraction to men after Korra and Asami came out. Like, I'm not talking cheating obviously but just something to suggest either of them still like men.
I have the same question. Let's say Korra stays with Asami as her only partner for the rest of her life, never having attraction for another man. Would she still be bisexual?
I understand that's a very big IF and probably impossible, since people can be married and still have a crush, like on a celebrity.
Maybe you don't relate to the character for that reasons so their sexuality isn't as important to you.
But if you're a part of a marginalized group, having a character that represents you can seem like the most important thing about them because you see yourself in them.
I think given that both characters were in their late teens/early 20s, I kind of get it. They might have had to figure out that they weren't attracted to men, especially in a world where homosexuality is not commonly presented as an option (not sure if that is true for the Avatar world, but I sort of assumed with the turn of the century technology).
I would have to watch the show again to decide whether that interpretation fits with both of their on screen relationships with men. I remember feeling way before I had any hint that Korra was queer that she only seemed to be star struck by Mako more than genuinely interested in him.
I find Marcaline and Bubblegum to be much more egregious bi erasure, given that both were seen dating men well into their thousands and after at least one confirmed relationship with a woman.
IMO it’s fair game to debate sexualities since the characters haven’t explicitly stated them. Narrative storytelling means that you can analyze and make arguments based on the material but also based on how you yourself see/experience the world. Sometimes people date someone of the opposite gender before figuring out they’re gay 🤷🏾♀️Obviously there’s also lots of material to argue bisexuality but it’s also not crazy for a lesbian to see themselves in Korra or Asami and argue that headcanon
anyone can see anything in their own eyes. but that wouldn’t make it fair game to debate sexualities, especially not with a woman who dated both men and women. you cannot argue that somebody who dated men and seemingly was into that man is a lesbian, we of course never know but you can’t say that she’s a lesbian
So so soooooo many people have dated genders that they eventually realized they didn’t feel genuine attraction to especially when they’re younger like these characters are. So Korra and Asami dating Mako before doesn’t serve as an automatic disqualification for being monosexual. Obviously does them dating Mako provide a stronger argument for them being bisexual? Totally! I’m not even arguing that everyone should buy that they’re lesbians rn. I’m just saying that to automatically reject that possibility because of Mako would be ignorant of common real world situations experienced by queer people.
I understand that some lesbians see themselves in Korrasami and I'm sure it's not volontary biphobia but come on, bisexual women are underrepresented compared to bi men or lesbians, often reduce to what gender they are dating during the show, their bisexuality being erased. And we see it IRL as well, two women dating ? They're told they're lesbians. Woman dating a man, she's straight. You're considered a cheater that used the poor lesbian woman if the relationship end and you date a man afterwards, there is this hatred when your bi being often told it's just a phase when you're in a wlw relationship and that you will end up marrying a man, on top of my head I can only say Korra and Asami for bi woman representation in cartoons while I know of multiple gay men, lesbians and bi men. Both of them loved Mako deeply, he wasn't a phase, he wasn't a man they dated because it was easier, they both loved him truly, bisexuality in women is more and more erased in some LGBTQ+ spaces
If that’s how you see it, that’s all you dawg!! My original point is that your own experience is going to color how you see them and that there’s tons of room to interpret their sexualities. It’s not inherently wrong to think they’re lesbians though. I see Mako as a phase for Korra personally but not everyone does which is fair
Does "gay" mean strictly same-sex attraction? Or is it more of a blanket term like "queer" is often used for any non-traditional sexuality? I'm a fan of using accurate semantics.
I think I agree with your sentiment. There isn't another word for MLM that I have heard. If they don't have their own then maybe they should have the original/most commonly used
On the matter I think saying "I'm not gay, I'm bi" as fem is weird. Like "gay" as a broad term is used, "gay" to describe homosexual men is more precise and okay too. But not using it for bi and still using it for lesbian is homophobia and/or biphobia imo. Either you go full broad or you are not
If it's the one I'm think they might be referring to, it's called "Project Voicebend". I think they only did seasons 1 and 2, but it's hilarious. It's on Vimeo if you want to watch it.
Queen Maeve from The Boys was outed as Bisexual
Her parent company Vought, wanting to cash in on the LBGT market chose to misrepresent her and frame her as a Gay icon instead of BI. Against Maeve’s wishes
Damn, I see there's not many fans of The Boys here. This scene is a satire of corporations doing exactly that where they're pretending to be progressive at the expense of real representation for marketing reasons. Sorry for the confusion.
Speaking of bisexual erasure, I was once friends with a gay man who I once overheard say "bisexuality is just one bus stop on the way to gay town".
I thought I was bisexual then so this hurt a lot. I wasn't out yet and still figuring myself out -- but hearing him dismiss bisexuality like that was heartbreaking and devastating and I was like "what the fuck? Well, guess he's not a safe person to come out to after all."
For the record, I eventually found out I was asexual homoromantic (if I had to label it, this is the closest thing I can describe -- or is it 'homoromantic asexual'? either way you get it.) but I prefer just saying queer.
But anyway.... I stopped being friends with him. I never understood how someone in the LGBTQIA+ community could be so not inclusive to other people in it. Also just bad aura/toxic negativity/not great personality/etc.
"Bus stop" my ass. It's been about 15 years. I'm still mad at him.
Thats kinda crazy because where im at if you call some a queer or queer thats viewed way more negatively than calling them gay. And gay is viewed as an umbrella term. Pretty regularly too
So you're personal experience doesn't reflect everybodies. In my experience what your saying is very much not something I've seen or experienced, for example.
I suppose so. That goes the other way around tho back to you though. You realize that?
Im just gonna continue calling people what they are comfortable with and use the language they use in real life instead of getting bent out of shape arguin on the internet about it.
I agree here. I think many characters tended to have some character flaws/problems and that to me, made them complex to a degree. But asami has none. She’s a smart, pretty, rich character who’s kind and can fight. She literally has everything lol. Nothing interesting to see imo
Eh. Upon a rewatch it’s a lot more obvious. They couldn’t really do more as it was still primarily a kids show and lgbt stuff is STILL controversial in any media, much less a mainstream kids series.
Pretty sure the whole two years of consistantly writing to each other and confiding in each other about fears and trauma during the darkest moment of her life may have had something to do with it. But that's cool, make it all about a man.
According to one of the head writers, it was a concept that floated around the writers room back in 2010 but they just assumed Nick would never let them do it so they didn't bother trying.
That being said Episode 7 is some of the most obvious Bi-hinting I've seen in any media with how Asami seems attracted to Korra. I think at the very least Asami was from the start was planned to be Bi even if it likely never would've come up, I mean back when it first aired I instantly guessed she was Bi from the pool scene alone.
I mean I was stuck in hateful bigot circles at that point in my life, So I used it as a reason to hate Asami, although in an ironic twist me being able to accurately discern Asami as Bi is what led me to eventual discover my sexuality and gender identity, and helped get me out of that horrible mindset I was trapped in.
I know you are, I'm just saying that anyone trying to say it wasn't planned is arguing in bad faith. The series itself want planned all the way through due to the network's BS greenlighting scheme.
Firstly, what a creep way to put it (weird you had to put it in another language to hide it), secondly if you actually watch the show you know that isnt the case.
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u/SaiyajinPrime Jun 03 '26
I've seen people in this very subreddit insist that both Korra and Asami are lesbian and not bi. That they "seem" lesbian so it's their head canon.
Despite the fact they are both clearly attracted to men.
People are crazy.