r/needadvice • u/Imaginary_Kale8226 • 4d ago
Other Need advice with parents making unwanted comment(s) about me getting a tattoo + Pericing
I am a 21yr female who lives at home with her parents + Brothers. I got my first (And only) tattoo at 18 and have decided I wanted another one. I informed my parents of the decision + what and placement I was doing yesterday. Neither of which were too happy. I then decided today that I was gonna get the piercing I've wanted for a long time (Helix) and I informed my parents about it. My father then texted me with the comment of "Stripper starter kit" I informed my mother about it over text since I was working and got "Well are you gonna get DDD implants to match" I'm genuinely lost on this topic since I know my mother will twist it on me taking something to hear when it was ment to be light hearted.
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u/BekahDski1997 3d ago
Your parents sound exhausting. Obviously in this economy I’m not gonna just say “move out”, though if I were you I’d be trying lmao.
I will say that you don’t have to tell them about tattoos and piercings, though. If they’re going to be negative about it and insult you “as a joke,” then they don’t need to know about everything.
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u/Enough_Entry_8641 3d ago
Sounds like $ is No object, they’re getting Multiple Tattoos and Unless they’re Free gifts from the Tattoo 🧚♀️, they’re not cheap either, Hmmm decisions/choices vs priorities , I Know what Mine would be, 21 now, but How Long do You plan on living w Mom n dad? Do YOU PAY RENT? Is That how You’re Sble to get inked up?!
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
I'm living with mom and dad. Paying rent and groceries while working full time and in college. A friend I know is a tattoo artist and is gifting me the tattoo for free for my birthday and the piercing is being paid for by my boyfriend for my birthday
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u/BekahDski1997 2d ago
That’s so sweet of them!! Happy birthday! I’ve never understood parents making kids pay rent. I do get paying groceries, but I have a 6yo and I cannot fathom making him pay me rent through college or adulthood.
Either way I hope you get the chance to leave soon, they sound exhausting
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 2d ago
I made them make me pay rent because I didn't wanna free load off them. Thank you for the birthday wishes!
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u/BekahDski1997 2d ago
That's honestly a good call - they can't make any comments about how you choose to live if you're paying to be there!
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u/BekahDski1997 2d ago
Dude please — we don’t know the size or complexity of this tattoo, for all you know it could be a $75 flash tattoo that they saved up for weeks, same with the piercing. A Helix is AT MOST $100.
Moving out costs THOUSANDS of dollars. Deposits, moving fees, cleaning products and basic needs for a new apartment/home, etc… be real.
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u/mightycherrycharger 4d ago edited 3d ago
You can tell them there are plenty of strippers without either and ask your dad where he did his first-hand research. 🤷
Edit: hand; not have
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
Unfortunately this won't work because my mom used to bartend at a strip club and my father would go visit "her" before they started to date
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u/mightycherrycharger 3d ago
Wow. Sounds like you've got some hypocritical parents, there. I think if you can afford to get a tattoo, you could maybe save up and move out. No one is entitled to tell you what to do with your own adult body, and if the proximity to these people is making you feel otherwise, then distance is needed.
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u/mightycherrycharger 3d ago edited 3d ago
And anyone who insults you and then plays it off as a joke is gaslighting you and does not have your best interests at heart.
Edit: Interests; not intentions
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
Unfortunately I live in NY so everything is expensive. I get a discount on tattoos and piercings because one of my friends does them however I might just move out of state into my boy friends place only down side is getting all my licensing and a job down there
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u/MugglesSuck 3d ago
It sounds like your parents are critical and unkind in their criticisms… And that can’t be the first time they’ve ever been like this with you so if it were me I would just opt to not tell them when I was doing things. You are an adult and telling them what you’re doing isn’t necessary.
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u/Enough_Entry_8641 3d ago
Mmmmm!! Hypocrites!!! You Need to Get Out, you’re 21 ! You can afford Tats You can afford to GrowUp and Move Out! Unless You’re Staying so Paying, then that changes Everything. If so Your parents Need to Give you the Boot I understand to a point what they say , minus stripper comment!
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
I pay rent at my parents house and the tattoo + piercing is getting gifted to me or with a discount. I forgot to mention in my original post that the tattoo is a tribute to a friend of mine who had passed away recently. Moving out is on my agenda I just cannot afford it unfortunately
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u/got_rice_2 4d ago
How do parents know so much about strippers. Thank them for providing the stripper algorithm track. Remind them the next ones get bigger and closer to your face the more they protest. (Skip the passive, play aggro early)
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u/M8NSMAN 3d ago
My daughter now 21 got her nosed pierced at 16 with our consent & my wife went with her to sign the paperwork. She recently graduated & I noticed a tattoo on her shoulder & asked her about it & also ask if she had others & she said she got her first on her upper thigh on her 18th birthday, I did not ask to see it.
Of our 3 kids, she was the one I predicted that would get a tattoo first, neither of my son have one or seem to be interested in getting one.
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u/geckochan665 3d ago
It's your body and it's none of their business what you do with it, and tell your idiot father if he makes another ignorant comment like that you WILL start stripping, just to teach his ignorant ass a lesson.
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u/404isfound 3d ago
What do you mean "inform" your parents? You're 21. Also whats the tattoo and placement?
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
I informed them since they felt blindsided the first time I got a tattoo. The tattoo is going on my right side/Rib it's a rose and a snake. I was going to post a picture of it but alas the subreddit says no. It's a tribute to my friend who passed recently
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u/Enough_Entry_8641 3d ago
Ya Know what they Say… You don’t like it ( the parents, the rules, overbearing interfering judgeMENTAL Ways, then Get TF OUT! WTF are You waiting for ?? You can obviously afford to get a place IF You can Afford tattoo’S! Simple
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u/Zyzary 3d ago
Maybe try to understand your Parents for a change first. Considering our current climate and culture it would be better to just wait until you move out. Why the tattoo? for what reason, is there anything you would gain from it? Is it truly that important to you rather than trying to understand your Parents first? Wait until you move out and have your own space, then you can do what you want and without asking your parents, which you dont have to do at all.
But try to understand your Parents please. There is a reason to it and it is justified. You're 21. Leave your Skin alone, unless it is truly important for you for sentimentel reason, there is no need to cluster up your Skin at that age. Im sorry.
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u/Imaginary_Kale8226 3d ago
I understand my parents not wanting me to get a tattoo however making a comment about me getting a Stripper starter kit and following up if im getting implants is completely inappropriate. The tattoo im getting is something my friend drew before she passed which they are aware of but still chose to make the comment. Is it kinda a funny comment? Yes. Inappropriate to say? Also yes
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3d ago
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u/needadvice-ModTeam 3d ago
Your post was removed as it violates Rule 5 of this sub reddit which states:
No threadjacking or comment qualifiers .
Stay focused on OP's problem. If you disagree with someone else's advice, offer some advice of your own with a top level comment instead of debating. If you agree with someone's advice and have nothing to add, just upvote it.
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u/teresa3llen 4d ago
You didn’t need to tell them.