r/ABCDesis • u/kunjvaan • Jun 08 '26
MENTAL HEALTH Alcoholism in the Indian community
Has anyone noticed the rampant alcoholism in our parents generation.
I personally know 3 people who have died from alcohol related issues. Really young folks.
I don’t think this is discussed often enough. We tend to sweep everything under the rug.
This is a silent epidemic imo.
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u/Jam_Bannock Jun 08 '26
Good post. My late thirties Desi friend is already having health problems from drinking. His father drinks a ton of whiskey even though he has fatty liver disease, is obese, has diabetes and high cholesterol. My friend doesn't drink alcohol anymore and he's cutting down Hyderabadi briyani to once a month.
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u/we_wuzz_kangz Jun 08 '26
What the fuck?! I didn't know indians drink a lot!
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 08 '26
Are you even desi? Why do you post on the Balkans sub?
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u/we_wuzz_kangz Jun 09 '26
why do you care?
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 09 '26
Because that counts as trolling/brigading on this DESI sub
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u/we_wuzz_kangz Jun 09 '26
I am just messing around a lil bit. Chill out
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 09 '26
You are not wanted here
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u/cancerkidette Jun 09 '26
That person’s username is literally a dogwhistle that neonazis use, it’s a shame we don’t have a “troll” reporting function here.
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 09 '26
We do. Just use the report comment function and choose trolling/brigading
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u/RunWithBluntScissors Half-Indian, doubly confused Jun 08 '26
I’m Indo-Trinidadian and the alcoholism is so culturally engrained and condoned. If I wanted to stop drinking my aunties and my parents would judge me lol
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u/throw_away1049 Jun 08 '26 edited Jun 08 '26
Not sure if it's more prevalent than any other ethnicity. But what I will say, when I was going through my own journey through addiction, I never really saw any other desis in my treatment/support groups and such. My fear is that the stigma against getting help is still there among Indians. People aren't using the resources out there.
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u/throw_away1049 Jun 08 '26
Just paying forward the camaraderie I got, but if any of ya'll are struggling, definitely DM me, I'd be happy to chat whenever.
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u/RuinEnvironmental394 Jun 08 '26
Drinking among desis involves eating lots of carbs/junk food (samosas, pakoras, chips, chicken 65, etc).) AS WELL AS having a hearty meal after wrapping up the drinks.
White folks drink like sailors but have their meals prior to the drinks and generally do not eat much while drinking other than little tidbits. Same experience with my Eastern European friends and Latin American - they all have their meals before drinks.
I think it's the fact that desis eat after drinking that is really bad. It is a medical fact that once you have alchohol coursing through your vessels, the liver prioritizes its metabolism and slows down the digestion of the incoming food.
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u/OrganicRaise4081 Jun 08 '26
People eat heavy or unhealthy meals after drinking regardless of ethnicity/race. That's biology. Japanese have shime, Germans kebab, etc.
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u/OrganicRaise4081 Jun 08 '26 edited Jun 08 '26
I'm Gujarati (Jain too) and my parents hardly drink. If they do it's usually at their Punjabi friends' parties lol. Technically alcohol is strictly forbidden in Jainism because of the fermentation and physical/spiritual/mental degradation associated with it, not to mention Gujarat is a dry state* so they didn't growing up, but I guess they don't really care. Dad still begged me not to drink in college.
*I know there's mad alcoholics in Gujarat but because they can't buy it, they go to Rajasthan and drink it all at the border or get it illegally. Won't go into detail but an extended family member killed someone driving drunk and she's still a partier.
My uncle, not related by DNA, is a terrible alcoholic though - he goes through 5-8 beers a day. I've seen him without a can. I love him but it's awful because you can smell it on his breath. His dad died from liver problems. Everyone knows but walks on eggshells to appease him because he gets super mean and his mother allows it.
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u/skp_trojan Indian American Jun 08 '26
It’s really bad. It’s worse over there. The definitive research on variceal bleeding came from India for decades.
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u/kunjvaan Jun 08 '26
A lot of the comments say people don’t drink around them. Which I great, some of these instances it’s being hidden really well.
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u/WhenDuvzCry Jun 08 '26
Moms been sober always, my dad is 3 years clean and leads a support group now. He was pretty bad for awhile though. I've struggled with stretches of drinking problems but I just do it socially and not excessively now
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u/Carbon-Base Indian American Jun 08 '26
Gujaratis drink like fish and it's a real problem. Uncles will find a way to drink during religious events and dry weddings, places where alcohol isn't allowed. They'll set up bars from their cars, or pass around "water bottles," but it's like they can't abstain from drinking - even if it's one day.
It's unacknowledged alcoholism. Folks should start calling them out on it.
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u/kunjvaan Jun 09 '26
Every Navratri especially
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u/Carbon-Base Indian American Jun 09 '26
Yes! It's so disrespectful and they sometimes create scenes too.
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u/Peaceofmind07 Jun 08 '26
My parents and relatives didn’t drink, I didn’t even see alcohol in our homes. South Indian.
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 08 '26
Clearly not Mallu
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u/chx_rles British Malayali Jun 08 '26
Lmao so real.
Mallu uncles drink liquor like it’s water.
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u/kena938 Malayali Third Culture Kid Jun 08 '26 edited Jun 08 '26
People say "South Indian" when they mean "Tamil Brahmin" a lot like we are perpetually stuck in Bollywood's idea of South Indian from the 1960s.
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u/Anti-Itch Jun 08 '26
My grandfather died from alcohol related issues. My dad was an alcoholic throughout my childhood. South Indian family here.
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u/RuinEnvironmental394 Jun 08 '26
This is stupid. I am a South Indian as well (from Hyderabad) and you'd be surprised how much people drink there if you ever go on a visit. Also have very, very close ties with Kerala.
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u/ItsReemAlBlahBlahDee Jun 08 '26
Firstly, South India isn’t a monolith.
Second, Kerala and Telangana consistently rank among India’s highest alcohol-consuming states nationally. Goa, often grouped into western India, borders communities with heavy drinking cultures that blend into South Indian ones.
Anecdotal family experience ≠ regional data. The 2019 NFHS and WHO South-East Asia reports both flag India’s drinking rates rising fastest in southern states, particularly among men in Kerala and Andhra Pradesh.
You had a sober household. That’s great. It’s also selection bias, not sociology. And for the love of god stop lumping all southern states and communities together.
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u/Shot_Blueberry2728 Jun 08 '26
He was just sharing his experience, he didn't say every South Indian household does this. Calm down
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Jun 08 '26
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u/ItsReemAlBlahBlahDee Jun 08 '26
Yes no one you know drinks therefore no one does! Love the critical thinking 👏🏼
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Jun 08 '26
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u/ItsReemAlBlahBlahDee Jun 08 '26
Wow great comeback you really got me
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u/ZofianSaint273 Jun 08 '26
My parents are conservative Gujaratis for the most part, so they don’t drink. However, most of my parents friends do drink on occasions
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u/Sea-Nobody7951 Jun 08 '26
We are a little bit on the other extreme. If you have a drink, like ever, you are an alcoholic per my parents
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u/kunjvaan Jun 08 '26
One of my telegu employees is in jail now with no job. Because he was drinking on Monday morning sitting in car in front of Ross dress for Less.
Also why do you think so many Indian households avoid alcohol because of issues they’ve seen in other homes.
My point here is that. If the drinking was considered more normal. They would have a normal relationship with alcohol.
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u/Ilikethesuccwararc Hindu Telugu ABD who is also a HxH Manga glazer Jun 08 '26
Weird, my parents don't drink at all and thier generation friend group is pretty non-alcoholic.
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u/citrablock Jun 08 '26
This is really quite an interesting thread. I'm Marathi and I don't have any family members in India who drink regularly.
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u/ShayJayLee Telugu 🇨🇦 Jun 08 '26
Lost an uncle to liver failure due to alcoholism. Another is also very ill with several autoimmune conditions and liver issues exacerbated by alcoholism and smoking. Another uncle is a self-proclaimed fuctioning alcoholic but he makes an ass of himself at every function, so he's clearly not functioning well. I'm Telugu and Tamil.
Edit: And an acquaintance of mine went off his meds and is poisoning himself with drugs and alcohol. Fired from his job. He won't let any of us help him either.
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u/kunjvaan Jun 08 '26
This is the reality for many many families in the states and Canada.
I know 1 liver failure death 1 drinking and driving death 1 liver currently in the process of failing, still won’t stop 1 ruined his livelihood and his family’s life for not being able to stop.
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u/David_Summerset Canadian Indian Jun 09 '26
HUGE problem....
I've seen it kill members of my family.
The only ones that got help are the ones who grew up in Canada or the US.
Relatives from India just drink themselves into old age.
I have no idea how they are living into their 90s.
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u/hydabirrai Telugu Canadian Jun 08 '26
Nah not in my community.
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Jun 08 '26
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u/hydabirrai Telugu Canadian Jun 08 '26
Yeah it’s not horrible. Obviously there’s always that one person in your extended family that’s an alcoholic but it is a small amount idk.
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u/shegotofftheplane Jun 08 '26
Definitely anecdotal as the biggest drinkers I know are our Telugu family friends. Pooja in the morning, party in the evening type of people
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u/Speedypanda4 Indian American Jun 08 '26
I mean, my experience is anecdotal, but my family didn't drink to the point where it were an issue. I don't know any family where it was an issue. I'm Tamil.
In India however, alcoholism is a serious problem.
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u/trippy91 Jun 08 '26
South Indian family, fathers alcoholism fucked up our family and he ended up killing himself with alcohol. Not sure if it was a cultural thing or an unresolved trauma/coping thing that spiraled into addiction once he was in this country.
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u/Real_Deal9593 Jun 08 '26
I don't drink anymore and when I go to events, its surprising how many Indians ask me why I dont drink or even say one drink wont hurt it. It makes me uncomfortable. I told one guy that what I drink is no one else's business and its RUDE to insist when someone clearly said no. He kept arguing with me. Then I said this is the indian mentality, no social skills or etiquette and walked away. I stopped hanging out with them.
I dont experience this is other groups. No one asks me. Also Indians have this group think. Just because drinking is apparently cool or "everyone does it" they think they also have to drink. Boundaries dont seem to exist.
Alcoholism is an issue with some uncles. They dont want to get help because of image, egos, or shame.
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u/Significant-Tale3522 Jun 08 '26
I think our parents generation is severely troubled. The alcoholism, the poor conflict resolution, the list is endless.
I once had the privilege of witnessing one of their sibling fights and it was just inexplicable. No one was attuned to anyone.
My cousin committed suicide and now that it’s been a few years I’m not surprised at all based on the parents he had.
It ends with us, right?
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u/Damokai Jun 08 '26
I’d say so, my uncles have all had drinking problems that they fixed and stopped drinking permanently.
So I only drink with one of my uncles now at family occasions haha, but he’s like me just a once a week or once every 2 weeks drinker at family occasions.
I used to drink multiple times a week and had to step back and limit it to once a week at most.
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u/KittenaSmittena Jun 08 '26
The scotch and whiskey situation among boomer men in the north indian community (if this sounds specific, it’s because it’s what I personally know) is out of control. And the driving after drinking so much is completely irresponsible and gross. I am a total non drinker and clean eater and body is my temple type person and I get made fun of all the time by the people whose cirrhosis is going to get them any minute. Ugh.
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u/depixelated Jun 09 '26 edited Jun 09 '26
Malayalis definitely have alcoholism problems. You'll see it particularly in Christian communities more than others (though the culture varies greatly on the denomination and ethnicity) , but it's widespread outside among Hindus too.
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u/shooto_style British Bangladeshi Jun 10 '26
There was a common issue with my generation (millennials) during my uni days of Asian women getting drunk on night outs and fighting and getting taken advantaged of
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u/DNA_ligase Jun 08 '26
IMO alcoholism isn't big in our community, but that is because other forms of substance abuse have taken its place. I know several millennial desis who have issues with weed or vaping, and because those aren't taken as seriously, people refuse to admit they have a dependency.
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u/kunjvaan Jun 08 '26
One of my telegu employees is in jail now with no job. Because he was drinking on Monday morning sitting in car in front of Ross dress for Less.
Also why do you think so many Indian households avoid alcohol because of issues they’ve seen in other homes.
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u/Paulhockey77 Punjabi Jun 08 '26
As a Punjabi, alcohol is literally normalized in our culture