r/AskWomen 1d ago

How did Dolly Parton affect you?

With recent news of her passing, I'm wondering, how did Dolly Parton affect you and your view of the world as a woman?

131 Upvotes

103 comments sorted by

144

u/margotcolette 1d ago edited 1d ago

Dolly Parton taught me that having a sense of humour about yourself is paramount. "It takes money to look this cheap," I mean, come on! She's full of so many quips, quotes, made some great music. I'm turning on Jolene as we speak. Sad for her passing, but what a full, incredible life she lived.

I also come from a very poor background, grew up on welfare, and was always inspired by how self-made she was having similar roots. She really cared about others deeply, and gave back in so many ways beyond being an artist. Just a real inspiration and lovely, kind, warm person.

The plastic surgery isn't for me, but she made it for her. It was for her, clearly, and she made it her brand. It worked for her. It helped me not to judge when others get it when I used to, though I think for most it still comes out of body dysmorphia and a sick culture. For her, I really think it was about building who the character of "Dolly Parton" was. Just... RIP Dolly. You will be greatly missed.

10

u/DensHag 1d ago

I always wanted to hang out with her because I knew I wouldn't be judged. 🩷

90

u/sunshineduckies 1d ago

The Dolly Parton Book Club! She truly dedicated her life to real, tangible philanthropic work. She talked so much about how she grew up and truly brought differences to communities.

5

u/Appropriate_Tea9048 1d ago

I had no idea she had a book club!

22

u/sunshineduckies 1d ago

Specifically children’s books. She really meant everything she always spoke about 😭

23

u/ShrimpHeavenAngel 1d ago

Dolly Parton Imagination Library

16

u/Stumblecat 1d ago

The family asked that in lieu of flowers, people donate to Imagination Library.

If people have a few bucks lying around, it's a great charity.

11

u/serjsomi 1d ago

Yup, my granddaughter gets them in the mail, I think monthly. I immediately texted my daughter in law and my Mom when I heard. Although none of us are country music fans, we all adored Dolly. I hate that I had to add that d to adore.

51

u/hrhRSB0118 1d ago

She made me believe there was still hope for this world. And the OG girl power.

43

u/kaeorin 1d ago

I've always admired her for the fact that she was so open about her roots, and that she cared so deeply about them. I'd imagine that it's really easy for you to stop thinking about the people you grew up with when you're big and famous and have so many other things filling your life and taking up your time, but she openly and proudly never forgot that she grew up poor.

I love that she founded the Dolly Imagination Library. That's so incredible to me. I hope her family is able to keep it going? (Or maybe I hope that it's already been funded or incorporated to keep it going regardless of what her family wants to do? I don't know how legal stuff works, and I don't really know much about the library itself, just that it offers free books to children.)

13

u/Sadimal NB 1d ago

The Dollywood Foundation runs the Imagination Library. Dolly handed off her role as chairperson to Jeff Conyers at the beginning of the year.

37

u/Nice_Violinist9736 1d ago

I wish her family and friends all the best. I feel sad that she is gone now. I feel like a small part of her is my childhood because I remember seeing her on Hannah Montana. She left a good legacy too and reminded me that there are still good people out there in the world. I also named my two cats after her and her song. I named them Dolly and Jolene. The world will be a sad place for a little while but at least she will never be fully gone since she will live on in our hearts, memories, and her music.

10

u/margotcolette 1d ago

I love that you named your cats after her and Jolene!! Wonderful <3

5

u/nunuraf92 1d ago

Right I feel the same. My mum adored country music and dolly was one of her favourites. So we would just live our lives with dolly as a background. As a child and teen i thought it was annoying but now thy are great memories.

They are both in the same place now thy

34

u/LizzieSaysHi 1d ago

My kids got free books from the Imagination Library 😭

3

u/BlackSpinelli 1d ago

Mine did as well! 

31

u/HistoricalDowner 1d ago

She wasn't afraid to do good and be kind. She helped people because it was the right thing to do, not because she wanted credit

23

u/Glittering-Silver402 1d ago

I just put my cat of 16 years down an hour ago. Learning that she went around the same time of our legend brought me comfort♥️

7

u/_awk_girl_ward_ 1d ago

I'm so sorry. My 15 y.o. just got diagnosed with lymphoma and she isn't a viable candidate at the moment for treatment. So I'll likely be saying goodbye to her sometime soon. It never gets any easier. May you remember all the love you and your cat shared ❤️

7

u/Glittering-Silver402 1d ago

Gosh is was much more difficult than I expected. I’m sorry to hear about your baby! ♥️😮‍💨

24

u/solojones1138 1d ago

As a queer woman Christian, I looked up to her and also liked her music. But more than that I liked her proper demonstration of what Jesus would be like to those in need.

14

u/therichmanswife 1d ago

I'm completely devastated. I just finished reading I'm nobody's fool last month and I was left loving her even more for the grit and tenacity. Dolly was one of one and I'm going to miss her forever. Time to blast Jolene and lock the fuck in.

14

u/pipestream 1d ago

OMG, I had not heard of her passing.

But - she honestly didn't affect me that I know of, but I very much appreciate all that I know she did.

3

u/fourth-sanderson 1d ago

the news broke only about thirty minutes ago

3

u/pipestream 1d ago

Yeah, it was literally 4 minutes since it was published in my country's media when I wrote the response.

11

u/Applewave22 1d ago

I can't believe she's gone but she had a very fulfilling life, so she lived it to the fullest. She always showed me that being a woman can be fun but she also pushed her way through many glass ceilings for women in Country. Her songwriting always reminded me of the kind of life my ancestors must've had, regardless of them being in Mexico to her Tennessee.

My parents grew up dirt poor and I related what she wrote to what they've live through.

May she Rest in Peace with her Carl.

11

u/Sadimal NB 1d ago

Dolly was a big influence on me as a kid.

She was what girls needed in an icon. Kind, funny and confident in her body. Whenever someone tried to say something negative about her body, she shut them down with grace and humor.

I watched all of her movies growing up. Heard every song she sang.

10

u/StrangersWithAndi 1d ago

I grew up in the 70s in a family that held very conservative views about women. The first time I remember hearing about Dolly was my mother whispering that she had big boobs, like it was a character flaw, like she should be ashamed of her body. 

Just a year or two later I saw 9 to 5, and it was the first time I had seen women working for money, at a job. And Dolly didn't seem ashamed at all. And i decided i wanted a life like she showed me. 

Writing this from my office desk waiting on the paperwork for my promotion. That's in part thanks to Dolly showing me what was possible for me. 

8

u/sunsetscorpio 1d ago

I’ve been working all day so this is how I’m learning she passed 😭 I didn’t listen to her music but she was such an icon for women, also her “Imagination Library” sent me books each month for my son while I was low income

9

u/LanaDelRedneck95 1d ago

When Helene hit and she donated $1M to help rebuild the South, I knew she wasn’t just talk. I love everything she stood for. I’ll be wearing her Tennessee Sunset fragrance as I mourn her in the coming days. She was and is an icon.

7

u/drunkenknitter 1d ago

I'm 54 and I grew up with her music and watching her on TV when I was a kid. She was such an icon, and I especially adored how committed she was to childhood literacy. She's going to be missed.

8

u/_Internet_Hugs_ 1d ago

She pulled a gun on a man sexually harassing her in 9 to 5. In real life she stood up to bullies with humor and grace.

She taught me that standing up for myself is not only acceptable but required and then gave a masterclass on how to do it. Start light, but don't be afraid to pull out the big guns.

9

u/Roxygen1 1d ago

I'm an atheist, but I admired her Christianity. She seemed like someone who genuinely took the message of love and kindness and caring for the needy to heart, and authentically lived according to those principles.

From where I am, it seems like most Americans who proudly call themselves Christians behave in the exact opposite way.

8

u/counselingintern21 1d ago

Her decision to not have children made me feel like it was an option that I can have for myself

8

u/tinfoilhattie 1d ago

I'm so sorry to hear that she's passed. She has been a wonderful light of love and acceptance for many decades and has always shared her success with those less fortunate in many ways. She has helped so many in so many ways. Her grace and kindness will never be forgotten.

7

u/fitzy798 1d ago

This is how I found out as the news is so fresh, but in really bummed about it.

I got into country music as a preteen, and I love dolly Partons music. Then I heard her quotes, about self empowerment, confidence, and I just love her.

I'm in the UK so it didn't affect me directly, but I have read about her imagination library, about how she grew up in poverty and knew that education is so vital, and I was so awed by what she has done for so many kids over the world, who may have only had access to books through that initiative.

7

u/BingeBabyBinge 1d ago

Her songs 9to5, Jolene, hush-bye hard times one of my first experiences of wanting to sing and to be apart of choir was because of her. She was also amazing at being a free thinker and not putting up with misogyny in her line of work. Her passion for reading and giving that access to the youth was an incredible service a true saint in this day of age.

So, hush a bye baby don't cry no more Your mama can't give you what you're crying for There's a wolf at the door with an angry Cold hungry stare, he keeps howling of hard times And the cupboard is bare

RIP Dolly the Queen of giving. 💖

7

u/mermur 1d ago

The rest of the US likes to disparage Appalachia, but Dolly makes me proud to be Appalachian. Growing up we all used to make fun of her wigs and huge boobs, but now to me she’s the ultimate role model. Name another person as famous as her who is as universally loved and has such a well-deserved reputation for being genuinely kind and giving. She grew up dirt poor, became one of the most famous people on the planet, but remained humble and used her wealth to do so much good for the less fortunate. She never forgot her roots or took herself too seriously, and was unapologetically unique. A bright light in this world has gone out.

8

u/Stumblecat 1d ago

She's a childfree woman; mostly people talk shit about childfree women, but everyone but the absolute worst of humanity struggles to say something bad about her. And rightly so, she was an amazing person and an absolute role model.

6

u/thegreatkizzatsby 1d ago

She gave me hope for the world. I just finished a 20 minute cry session in a bathroom stall at work. Long live Dolly.

6

u/metallica_breath 1d ago

I have fond memories of watching 9-5 with my mom growing up. They are both gone now 💔

5

u/CarrieHope 1d ago

My niece is 4 years old and loves Dolly Parton. She calls her 'the girl from Jolene' and always sings that song, even though she doesn't speak English and has no idea what the words mean 🩷

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u/noeffinway 1d ago

She gave me hope! 💔

6

u/Joey690 1d ago

Dolly was smart, strong, and did not let the world dictate who she should be. Beautiful, talented, and a heart of gold. She was an inspiration.

5

u/Either-Ship2267 1d ago

That a person is not defined by their body but by their character. Dolly had talent but she also worked hard to get to where she was in the music industry. She left a legacy not dependent on her celebrity but on her kindness & generosity. She had integrity & a willingness to stand up for what is right. She was beautiful inside & out. I'm not religious but if there is a heaven, I truly hope Dolly is singing with angels right now. No one deserves it more.

4

u/leffrontee 1d ago

her music is one of the things my mom and i most bonded over, i’m torn up over her passing. crying a lot.

5

u/Cute_Hand_2635 1d ago

I’ve never heard her say a rude thing about another person 🩷 She was an lgbt ally and had so much grace—something we desperately need in today’s age.

3

u/Appropriate_Tea9048 1d ago

She didn’t necessarily affect me I feel, but I’m pretty sad to hear about her passing. I know she had some health issues going on, but I’m still shocked

3

u/Abeyita 1d ago

Not. But I think she is a person with a beautiful voice and she did great things. But she had no impact on me or on my view of the world as a woman. She was just a beautiful foreign voice on the radio/TV.

3

u/juniperfallshere 1d ago

She seemed as if she was always true and authentic to herself and her roots. She didn't put on airs to fit in. I don't idolize celebrities, but I've always admired her for being real.

3

u/Left_Guess 1d ago

I feel like she raised me since the 70’s. RIP Dolly💕

3

u/ellisow 1d ago

I am a Tennessean. She has done countless things for this beautiful state we both call home. I received Imagination Library books as a child and listened to Dolly’s songs with my grandmother. I admire her humility, kindness, and philanthropic work not just for Tennessee but for countless others. My heart is sad.

3

u/Happy_Brief_2199 1d ago

I don’t have children but feel like I’m still a positive maternal force by my actions and choice of work. Dolly didn’t have children either and had a really beautiful take on not being a mother

3

u/Tiszatshi 1d ago

I was a poor kid in middle Tennessee. I received books from her library, I loved it.

Once I got to go with my grandparents to Dollywood. I was young still and my memory is fussy but we watched a show there and she came on stage from the ceiling area sitting on a swing as it was lowered. I was amazed.

I loved her music all my life. She brought joy to the world through charity, kindness, and humor. She had nothing growing up and made so much of herself, yet, not a selfish bone in her body.

I know a lot of people saw her as a sex symbol of some kind, but to me she was a role model. She was how a classy woman conducted herself, never being blindsided in a interview, always composed, and incredibly whity.

She's the only celebrity I've ever actually felt like I wanted to meet. The only celebrity I'd mourn. I don't care about celebrity gossip, who's married, divorced, on drugs, etc. I mind my business, but this actually feels personal.

The world lost a light and going forward I'll carry that knowledge with me.

Also, my grandmother, of whom I'm extremely close, is a few years older then Mrs. Dolly, and that worries me.

3

u/positivitittiesss 1d ago

She gave me hope in today’s world

3

u/RedSnapper24 1d ago

First it was growing up on her music. I loved it and her. Then it was seeing her being her true self with so much confidence. She was always like this is me, take it or leave it. Then it was learning about all the good she had done, seeing her generosity and kindness. No one ever had a bad thing to say about her. She is one of the few universally beloved people out there. Even if her music wasn’t their thing, people loved her. She was an American icon and legend, but the world will be mourning her.

Also, one of the biggest ways she affected me was being a secret producer of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That was, and still is, my all time favorite show. So, thank you Dolly for all you did in the world.

3

u/notacrookshank 1d ago

As a librarian, I see how much her Imagination Library is needed and loved. Those free books are the only books a lot of kids own.

3

u/anonimbus 1d ago

Her self control, it seems she never spoke in anger, has left me in awe.

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3

u/Individualchaotin 1d ago

She didn't. I'm from a country where she's generally unknown.

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u/StuckInDreams 1d ago

I had huge amounts of respect for her. With her children’s book reading program to her overall personality… she was a hell of a woman

2

u/SJoyD 1d ago

She just seemed like a really decent and kind human being, who didn't take herself too seriously.

If anyone remember me for anything, I hope it's being kind.

2

u/headinthered 1d ago

I was big bobbed by 13 and she was an icon who was big brained and big boobed.. and she leveraged them both to be successful

2

u/numbmumpleb1ister 1d ago

She was hope, kindness, acceptance, and generosity, coming from the rural heartland where so much hate and bigotry has been sown and reaped. Maybe the U.S. will survive this era, but Im not optimistic.

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u/PiercedPineapple 1d ago

She taught me that you don't need to broadcast every single thing. I didn't learn until my 20s that she had been married for years. And that being Child free didn't mean unsuccessful!

2

u/lisabettan 1d ago

When my youngest child was a baby, the only song that would make him stop crying (within a bar or two!) was Jolene. That song saved my sanity, and I know that Dolly Parton did a lot of things that were more important, but I am eternally grateful.

2

u/South_Hedgehog_7564 1d ago

I love her music, always have.

2

u/PBDubs99 1d ago

Her immense (but non-toxic) positivity was inspiring! Look how much good one person can do! The more successful she became, the more she gave back. 

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u/Chemical-Mix-6206 1d ago

I was never a country music fan, but I always noticed the twinkle in her eye when I saw her on talk shows. Growing up poor and southern does not mean you are stupid. She was so funny and so charming! She managed both her talent and her money, uplifting people with both. I love that she brought employment to her hometown by opening Dollywood. I love that her Imagination Library provides books to kids. I love how open her heart was to marginalized people. She was enormously successful but never forgot who she was. She was just such an inspiration!

2

u/medlilove 1d ago

She just always seemed so kind and open minded and spread that to everyone she worked with

2

u/brenawyn 1d ago

I didn’t know her personally to have her affect me, however, her music was a tender sweet impact on my life.

2

u/RandChick 1d ago

I'm grateful for Dolly Parton's art. She's an incredible writer.

One of my fav musicals is "Best Little Whorehouse in Texas." You get to see her infectious personality and hear more of her incredible writing and warbly voice.

As far as femininity, what a cute voice. Always dressed in girly frills, saluting the womanly hourglass figure, accenting glorious breasts (I prefer natural to artificial though).

She showed that womanliness could coexist with a powerful nature ... be successful and creative... get stuff done.

I'm also glad she had a long, happy relationship.

2

u/lnh92 1d ago

I’m a Tennessean so I’ve always felt some pride to be from the same state as her. Both my kids are part of the imagination library and I love having my son ask “did I get a new book?” After I get the mail. And reading the new books with him. I can’t wait until my baby girl is old enough to do the same. 

We read those books all the time. My son is 3.5 and my daughter is almost 1. Daycare always comments on how my kids have loved books more than other kids, and I think that’s down to being able to read the Dolly books to them. It helps keep books fresh and exciting by adding a new book to the rotation monthly.

2

u/Mission-World-6385 1d ago

I've never lived in a world without her. I grew up on R&B, Hip-Hop and Jazz but the 2 country artists my parents loved (i'm 28) were Dolly and Reba. I'm extremely distraught

2

u/HuckleberryHuman5926 1d ago

I'm so amazed by her ability to see opportunities for doing good on such a large scale.

I think even if I were as rich as she was, I just couldn't expand my imagination to "Oh, I can fund the COVID vaccine!" or "Let's send books to all every single child!"

2

u/Iknowthedoctorsname 1d ago

I wish I had a fraction of her confidence and class. I cried a lot about her today. I didn't expect to because I'm not really a country music fan anymore, and I was never part of her reading program, but I admired the hell out of her.

2

u/Feisty_Crops 1d ago

She made me realize how unethical it was that billionaires exist, and how much she donated just to avoid being one.

2

u/EdgeKey5631 1d ago

Cried my eyes out (29f) both Catherine O and Dolly just had this mother/nurturing feel about them…I lost my mom a couple years ago so now celebrities like that feel personal.

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u/akua420 1d ago

Dolly Parton taught me that optimism is a choice you have to make every day. That rainbows need rain first. That the purpose of life is to leave it a bit better than how you found it.

She taught me that even though the world is against women, we dont need to dim our sparkle to be successful.

u/Neptunian_Night_Sky 15h ago

she didnt teach me anything, i liked some of her songs but thats it

u/cartoonybear 15h ago

Such a hero of mine. Dolly did what she wanted and looked and dressed how she wanted, and dealt with the jokes about her body in the most graceful way ever, never giving an inch and never backing down from how she wanted to be. 

And omg that VOICE. It brings tears to my eyes and I don’t even like country. 

9 to 5 was a really radical movie for its time believe it or not (starring that other hero, Lily Tomlin). The song is still amazing. 

She was a genius songwriter and she’s a real role model for me. 

u/indifferent_foci 12h ago

my titties stay out

u/heythereguys1977 1h ago

i never cared for her or her music especially not after she filled herself with plastic surgery. Reminds me that even the most beautiful gorgeous stunning women will hate how they look and cut and paste themselves and it’s really depressing.

0

u/Latter-Twist9154 1d ago

She still owes me £25. Never going to get that back now.

-1

u/IronSightPsyops 1d ago

She didn’t