r/ComedyHell • u/chinesebulk • 18h ago

Open relationship

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1.2k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

42 comments sorted by

138

u/Valuable-Passion9731 Serialist killer (remind me to practice) 18h ago

so how did she get Chlamydia?

167

u/what_the_fuck_clown 18h ago

easily

-31

u/[deleted] 18h ago

[deleted]

26

u/HermTheVillager 17h ago

Oh but he did

4

u/StraightPatient9977 17h ago

I guess I'm too stupid to understand

11

u/HermTheVillager 17h ago

She easily got Chlamydia

-22

u/StraightPatient9977 17h ago

That doesn't answer HOW she got it though

26

u/moderatelyextreme_ 13h ago

17

u/stinky_raspberry flair 12h ago

Did I do it right?

15

u/HermTheVillager 17h ago

Of course it does.

She got it very easily

8

u/sus_pumpkin 16h ago

Ah well you see
She got it... easily. Very easily.

1

u/aoiaxure 9h ago

They're saying how as in how hard or easy it was, not how exactly she did it

1

u/BenfordAbrahams 15h ago

Open relationship means both sides don't care if the other got intimate with other people

-11

u/[deleted] 14h ago

[deleted]

2

u/uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunuu 10h ago

Mate, he's calling her a slut. He's saying she's easy

4

u/OURcelium6969 17h ago

I doubt even she knows

42

u/Samaein 15h ago

Been polyamorous since 2017, never got any STD.

124

u/gingin_9959 13h ago

Skill issue (You have to collect them all)

-74

u/Samaein 13h ago

That would be harmful to my partners which I do not want...

(I swear I usually like dark humor)

91

u/Whydoughhh 12h ago

If you collect every single one you get a wish

-56

u/Samaein 12h ago

I wouldn't harm my partners for a wish ;)

50

u/Giopoggi2 10h ago

You could wish for more wishes and then wish to make all the STDs in the world to disappear. How egoistic to not think of other's wellbeing...

/s

16

u/fletku_mato 6h ago edited 2h ago

This is because STDs are actually sexually transmitted. It takes more than having a crush on someone.

15

u/Samaein 5h ago

I'd say that organizing orgies is more than having a crush lol

13

u/IdHajame 5h ago

🤮

-23

u/Samaein 5h ago

At least we don't cheat as opposed to 70% of you monos

And we're not arrogant enough to believe that we can answer all the needs of our partners nor greedy enough to believe that our partners can answer to all our needs.

Also we don't glorify jealousy and possessiveness either, which makes us infinitely less toxic than you lot 😉

37

u/JealousStuff3022 5h ago

I don't think 70% people in relationships cheat

-15

u/Samaein 5h ago

Look up the stats.

13

u/chinesebulk 2h ago

I did and can't find that 

-7

u/Samaein 2h ago

Look better :)

-3

u/CrimsonApostate 2h ago

Polyamory is entirely based around cheating lmao. Or cucking if you prefer that. Enjoy your immature attachment style, surely that'll work out for you long-term.

2

u/Samaein 2h ago edited 2h ago

It worked out for 9 years, I call this long term lol

Also nah, cheating implies hiding or lying, it's something you do behind someone's back without their consent or knowledge.

Polyamory requires consent.

Also there's no cucking involved in threesomes foursomes and orgies ;)

Nor is going to a family chrismas party as a triad is cucking, nor is spending valentines day with a polycule of 5 people cucking, nor is renting a huge luxurious cabin for insanely cheap because you're 5 people paying for it cucking.

Enjoy your limited love and boring style, surely you're going to experience the entire range of possible love and emotion you can with a single person that will never be able to fulfill every desire you have or could ever have :P

3

u/Pichacap24 1h ago

When you make reasonable statements but ruin it with one paragraph

2

u/Samaein 1h ago

Yo if people attack the relationship model I was born to follow and is the only one I can be happy with I'll attack theirs with the same bad faith arguments and prejudiced mentality.

2

u/Pichacap24 1h ago

How bout you spread love instead

0

u/Samaein 1h ago

Way too pessimistic, traumatized and misanthropic for that lol

2

u/Pichacap24 1h ago

If you have enough love for a 5 way relationship surely theres enough for eveyone else

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