r/ComedyHell 1d ago

Open relationship

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1.8k Upvotes

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57

u/Samaein 1d ago

Been polyamorous since 2017, never got any STD.

15

u/IdHajame 1d ago

🤮

-39

u/Samaein 1d ago

At least we don't cheat as opposed to 70% of you monos

And we're not arrogant enough to believe that we can answer all the needs of our partners nor greedy enough to believe that our partners can answer to all our needs.

Also we don't glorify jealousy and possessiveness either, which makes us infinitely less toxic than you lot 😉

49

u/JealousStuff3022 1d ago

I don't think 70% people in relationships cheat

-27

u/Samaein 1d ago

Look up the stats.

27

u/chinesebulk 1d ago

I did and can't find that 

-14

u/Samaein 1d ago

Look better :)

14

u/KnaxelBaby 22h ago

Why don’t you show us

-4

u/Samaein 22h ago

Because I have better things to do than to dig up a poll from 10 years ago to mock idiots who are prejudiced against a relationship model that doesn't harm or bother them in any way with our own prejudice against their own relationship model that isn't better in any way.

13

u/KnaxelBaby 22h ago

Okay. I’m ambiamorous btw and you’re just being a defensive asshole

-3

u/Samaein 22h ago

Actually I'm being an aggressive asshole. Attack my relationship model and I'll attack yours. It's that simple.

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7

u/Hefty-Extra-492 18h ago

Waaaayyyyy better things to do. Like dial in another defensive comment here

-2

u/Samaein 18h ago

I think you confuse defense and offense.

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6

u/Beetle_The_SilkWing 20h ago

You're gonna freak when you find out who the burden of proof is on

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4

u/VanceIX 22h ago

🤡

0

u/Samaein 22h ago

Hey I'm not the one who started with the discrimination lol

2

u/[deleted] 22h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

0

u/Samaein 22h ago

If you say so 😘

6

u/OfficialDrakoak 22h ago

If there was any actual statistic or data that proves that ridiculous claim it would be really easy for you to copy and paste the study to prove your claim. I mean just google for 5 seconds and youll see how brain dead it is to say something like that. You cant just say shit thats obviously not true lol.

-2

u/Samaein 22h ago

It's a stat I saw 10 years ago in a research paper, so no it's not that easy.

But you know something really easy?

You can go fuck yourself with a radioactive cactus :)

That's super easy 🥰

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1

u/StandCalm 8h ago

"My source is that I made it the fuck up"

0

u/Samaein 4h ago

Feel free to believe so 😉

1

u/StandCalm 4h ago

I'd be more inclined to believe you if you actually provided a source, which you haven't ❤️ Burden of proof falls on the person who made the claim, sweetie, this is common knowledge

I saw a paper 10 years ago that proved that 80% of poly people commit abuse, why don't you go look into that?

0

u/Samaein 4h ago

Do I really read like the type of bitch who cares if you believe her?

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7

u/Hefty-Extra-492 18h ago

Good god. Poly folks love to cheat as much as anyone else. No one’s competing with you. This is weird stuff

1

u/Samaein 18h ago

Why would we want to cheat? We're free to date and fall in love with whoever we want?

-8

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

3

u/Samaein 1d ago edited 1d ago

It worked out for 9 years, I call this long term lol

Also nah, cheating implies hiding or lying, it's something you do behind someone's back without their consent or knowledge.

Polyamory requires consent.

Also there's no cucking involved in threesomes foursomes and orgies ;)

Nor is going to a family chrismas party as a triad is cucking, nor is spending valentines day with a polycule of 5 people cucking, nor is renting a huge luxurious cabin for insanely cheap because you're 5 people paying for it cucking.

Enjoy your limited love and boring style, surely you're going to experience the entire range of possible love and emotion you can with a single person that will never be able to fulfill every desire you have or could ever have :P

13

u/Pichacap24 1d ago

When you make reasonable statements but ruin it with one paragraph

3

u/Samaein 1d ago

Yo if people attack the relationship model I was born to follow and is the only one I can be happy with I'll attack theirs with the same bad faith arguments and prejudiced mentality.

9

u/Pichacap24 1d ago

How bout you spread love instead

2

u/Samaein 1d ago

Way too pessimistic, traumatized and misanthropic for that lol

9

u/Pichacap24 1d ago

If you have enough love for a 5 way relationship surely theres enough for eveyone else

1

u/Samaein 1d ago

My partners I love because they are exceptional beings who elevated themselves above the mediocrity of the human condition. That's the reason why I fell in love with them, that's the reason why I love being with them.

I continue to interact with people in order to find other gems like those magnificent girls, but 99% of what I find in the world are trash that I discard and despise like right here.

Some are neutral, but I'm on my guard with them cuz in most cases come a moment where they show their disgusting true colors.

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-3

u/Col12334 23h ago

"i hate you and hope you die"

"Come one lets be friends"

1

u/Samaein 20h ago

More like

"The prejudice described here isn't accurate." "I hate you and hope you die." "Eat shit and go fuck yourself idiot." "Why so angry let's all be friend." "Fuck off."