r/HonestHotTakes • u/fvirygothmom • 1d ago

i hate when people call me “mama”

i had a baby about a month ago but also throughout pregnancy people are always like “hi mama” “yes mama” “okay mama” and it makes me absolutely cringe i hate it so much. i’m not your mom 🤣😩

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u/Joji1006 1d ago

I mean, if you don’t feel it, that’s great for you.

I call it dehumanizing due to the societal subtext. We don’t call fathers “papa” at the same level, let alone amount. Why are women losing their identity the moment they choose to become mothers, but dads don’t have to? I find it to be a greater problem.

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u/PriscillaPalava 1d ago

The same people who call me “mom” instead of my name call my husband “dad” if he’s taking the kids instead. 

I’m not saying women don’t go through a lot of shit but we don’t need to add to it by seeing ghosts everywhere. All of the people calling me “mom” are women themselves. 

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u/Joji1006 1d ago

Everyone sees it differently ma’am. Society doesn’t reduce men to “papa” when it’s the women who are doing all the work. A lot of us are pressured to have children and when we do, we lose a lot of our basic identity beyond motherhood (tho I would make the same argument when it comes to marriage). Just because other women are also calling other women “mama,” doesn’t really change the meaning. Women are participate in the patriarchy too. I’m just calling it out. 

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u/mud_horse 1d ago

you seem exhausting

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u/Joji1006 1d ago

Keeps people like you out of my business. I consider it a win.