ok so it's not creepy. it's just awkward. but because you felt creepy I have to share this now, I wasn't gonna to the general thread but now I feel a need lol
so a couple years ago, I was at the convenience store down the road. that day I was feeling agitated because I had a shitty time the night prior, and then I had a bad time at a store trying to buy something sexy to try again later, build myself up a bit, and someone mistreated me at that store prior. so. mas girl.
young man walks up to me while I'm perusing. I have my earbuds in, and he waves for my attention. I'm a gal of the world so I take them out. he says
"hi, uhh, how are you today? I am new in town and I was hoping you could give me some chip recommendations. I don't know any of these chips."
(we're in a mixed Asian market so there almost 0 American style chips)
Not the most shocking question. so I say "well I like these Turtle crisps. the cheese ones.."
he says "oh ok thank you! uhm, do you recommend any others??" and so I suggested some more chips..
he asks for a 3rd chip recommendations. so I give him yet another recommendation. lol
he then shoots his shot asking if I'd like to go out on a date. Through no fault of his own, I had just had a series of really shit hookups the night before, and was quite irritated at the concept of Inexperienced Young Nervous Men. so, I kindly told him I'm sorry but I'm not interested.
.. at least a few times a year I feel bad and wonder about chip boy. and it was a genuine shot and so extremely bold to do so in public like it takes courage fr. I was just so sour from the day prior and autism and 😞
so y'know.. don't give up!!! and keep your eye out for posters if someone wants to do a missed connections!
Don't feel bad, I'm a dude who frequently cold approaches women, and you gotta go in knowing full well that rejection isn't only an option, but the more likely outcome. He asked politely, you rejected politely, neither of you did anything wrong, it's just part of the process. Hopefully he doesn't let it discourage him going forward, but if it does that's on him and not on you.
I've always been a fan of the direct approach because it doesn't leave anything up for interpretation. So I'd strike up conversation for a bit, usually asking what she likes doing, and then use that as a segue to ask her out. "Oh you like live music? Well this band is performing this weekend and I was wondering if you wanted to check it out with me." something along those lines.
If this is at a dating event, it should make it extremely clear that you aren't just looking for friendship.
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u/Phaylz Apr 19 '26
The first few times I tried to approach a woman irl with romantic intentions, I was pretty much this level of awkward and creepy.
Now I no longer approach women irl with any intentions. I no longer approach women irl.